Enlightened

by A. L. Waddington

I reached over and took Jackson’s hand in mine and looked over at Jenna. “I just want you to be happy for me. For us.”

  Jenna came over and sat back down beside Kyle. “What about college? You know if you get married your parents aren’t going to pay for it. And what if you get pregnant?” She slowly shook her head. “Birth control isn’t a hundred percent,” she pointed out as if I wasn’t aware of that.

  “I promise you. She will go to college and graduate. I will take care of that. And as far as having children, that is between us. However, I can tell you that her education is every bit as important to me as it is to her.” Jackson leaned over and lovingly kissed me on the cheek.

  “I seriously doubt that,” Jenna mumbled and Kyle elbowed her in the ribs.

  “I am sorry that you doubt my sincerity. I love Jocelyn more than I can explain.” Jackson laughed a little and looked over at me. “You know, I thought I would be having this conversation with your parents. Not your friends.”

  “Aren’t you lucky? You get to have it twice!” I smirked.

  “Yeah. Lucky me,” he grimaced.

  “Kyle, Jenna was not supposed to tell you about this. We want to keep it quiet for now because we figure everyone else is going to react much the same. Therefore, we want to wait until spring break before announcing our engagement.”

  I knew Kyle wouldn’t breathe a word, but now that Jenna was so against us, I only hoped she could keep her mouth shut for once in her life.

  “Fine, but aren’t you going to at least tell Caitlyn and Hilary?” Kyle looked surprised.

  “Not yet. We don’t want the entire school to know because once Ethan gets wind of this, my parents are going to attack,” I laughed.

  “Point taken.” Jenna finally laughed.

  ***

  Robert and Emily returned shortly before seven o’clock with armloads of groceries. Robert hollered at Jackson that there was more in the car and both guys went out to retrieve them. Jenna and I joined his parents in the kitchen to help unpack everything.

  “Is there a party at your house this evening?” Emily inquired, putting her perishables in the refrigerator.

  I looked over at Jenna who busted out laughing. We had both forgotten that everyone was congregating at my house for the evening.

  “I can’t believe this. Kind of, I guess. A few of our friends were coming over to hang out.” I shook my head in disbelief.

  “I had forgotten all about that,” Jackson remarked as he entered the kitchen and placed more bags down on the counter.

  “Forgot about what?” Kyle asked, coming in behind him.

  “Everyone was meeting over at my house to hang out tonight,” I answered.

  Kyle started laughing. “So that’s why there’s so many cars. Who’d all you invite?”

  “Caitlyn, Zak, Cody and Hilary, plus us four. Why? How many people are over there?” Dear God what has Ethan done now?

  “About six, I think,” Jackson answered.

  “Wonderful, guess we’d better head over.”

  “Excuse me, Jocelyn,” Emily spoke up. “I got those things we discussed earlier if you want to come by tomorrow evening for dinner and we can start sorting through them.”

  “Wonderful,” I gave her a big hug. “Thank you, for everything. I really appreciate it.”

  The four of us headed over to my house to discover that my idiot brother had invited several of his friends as well. My parents were held up in the living room watching television and didn’t look all too thrilled about hosting a house full of teenagers.

  My mother hollered at me as soon as we walked in the door. The other three headed on downstairs while I approached my parents. Neither appeared to be in a very good mood.

  “Did you invite all these people over and then take off to Jackson’s?” she asked.

  “Not exactly.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” My dad was clearly annoyed.

  “After practice this morning it was suggested that since all of us were broke that we hang out here this evening and watch movies. But I only invited my usual group. I am not responsible for the rest of the people down there. That’s all Ethan.”

  “Jocelyn, you know we don’t mind if your friends hang out here. That’s why we finished the basement for you kids. But we would appreciate it if you would at least be considerate enough to clear it with us first before you decide to host a bunch of people down there.” She used her scolding voice making me feel like a four year old.

  “I’m sorry. It won’t happen again,” I apologized to them.

  “All right. Now go join your friends. And clean up the mess when they leave.” My father returned to his paper obviously still not happy about the impromptu party.

  I was stunned by the time I reached the basement. Now I understood why my parents were so upset. There must have been at least twenty people milling about. Some playing pool, others dancing like morons by the jukebox, and others lounging on the sofas talking over the noise of the television and music.

  My eyes quickly scanned the room for Ethan. I finally located him over in the corner talking with a blond girl whom I recognized from school, but didn’t know.

  I stormed over to him angrily and grabbed his arm. “What in the world were you thinking?” I demanded.

  “What? You invited your friends over so I invited some of mine,” he shrugged.

  “And I just got yelled at because you didn’t get permission for this mess. And my friends know how to behave themselves. Look at this place! I’m not cleaning this up, Ethan!”

  I left him with his jaw hanging open to locate my group of friends amid the crowd of blurred faces. The seven of them were huddled in the corner talking amongst themselves.

  “Why didn’t you tell us there was a party here tonight?” Caitlyn asked teasing.

  “I didn’t know myself.” I rolled my eyes in disgust.

  “What’ll you guys want to do?” Hilary asked.

  “Leave,” I answered.

  “And go where?” Cody asked.

  “Anywhere. I don’t care. Just not here,” I responded.

  “We could go over to my house and watch a movie,” Jackson offered.

  “What about your parents? Won’t they mind?” Hilary asked.

  “Let me check.” Jackson took out his cell and began texting.

  He turned back around to face us with a big grin. “All set. My parents would be happy to have us all.”

  “Fabulous. Let’s go.” Caitlyn clapped her hands together and headed for the stairs with the rest of our group following right behind her.

  ***

  Jackson and I curled up once again on the sofa in his living room. The rest of our friends were all coupled off and relaxing. Emily set out drinks, chips, and dips for us before she and Robert disappeared into the study.

  Zak riffled through the Chandler’s DVD collection in the family room bookcase hollering out different suggestions hoping that something of a consensus could be met amongst the eight of us. Anything remotely feminine was universally booed by all four of the men while all the action and fantasy were given thumbs down by us females.

  “Oh. Fabulous! I love this movie!” Zak jumped back up and ran over to the Blu-ray player.

  “What did you put in?” Cody tossed a throw pillow in Zak’s direction.

  “Back to the Future.”

  “Sounds good.” Cody leaned back against Hilary.

  “Can you imagine how cool it would be to travel through time?” Caitlyn asked the room.

  “I wouldn’t go back to when my parents were teens,” Zak replied.

  “Me neither,” Hilary concurred.

  “I agree,” I stated.

  Jackson tightened his grip around my shoulder and smiled slightly. He looked utterly at ease in this world of mine.

  The movie started and the room went silent. The only sound was the occasional crunch of a chip or a sip of soda.

  “I don’t know it might be fun,” Jenna piped up. “I think it i
s funny the way the mom tells her children she never drank, called a boy or sat in a parked car with a boy. Then Marty finds out she wasn’t exactly as innocent as she wanted her children to believe she was.” Jenna wrinkled her nose.

  Jackson and I both stifled a laugh as Caitlyn responded, “Yeah, my mom wants me to think she was so innocent when she was a teen.”

  “Can you imagine seeing the 1980s firsthand? That would be so cool. They had great clothes and the music was so cool,” Hilary added.

  “Who cares? Gee whiz. Hush up. We’re trying to watch the movie.” Cody glared up at her.

  “Oh shut up. You’ve seen it before.” Hilary playfully shoved him off her lap.

  “Hey!” Cody hollered when he hit the floor.

  “Will you both shut up?” Zak threw a blanket at them on the floor.

  “Hey. Thanks.” Cody picked it up and snuggled back into Hilary who giggled, wrapping her arms back around him.

  “Seriously. Where would you go if you could travel through time and go anywhere you wanted?” Jenna asked the room.

  “Oh, I don’t know. That’s a hard one. Would we still know everything we know now?” Zak looked over at Jenna.

  “Ummmm…yes. I suppose so. Why?”

  “Because that makes all the difference in the world.” Zak shifted his position and his face took on a serious look. “See, if you knew everything you’ve learned in our history classes about the wars, famine, and misery suffered by our ancestors it would be hard to pick a time in history you’d want to see.”

  “That’s true. Knowing what we do about the Revolutionary War, the Civil War, the World Wars, Korea and the Vietnam War…” Kyle’s voice trailed off as he got lost in his own thoughts.

  “I love the beautiful gowns the women wore in the mid nineteenth century, like the ones from Gone with the Wind.” Hilary added.

  “Can you imagine how hot those gowns must have been during the summer? Especially in the South with no AC or electricity? It would have been miserable.” Caitlyn turned toward Hilary.

  “Yeah, I’m not so sure I would want to live or even visit that time period,” Zak added. “The Civil War literally tore the country in half, even families in half. I wouldn’t want to live through that.”

  “Yeah, me neither. The Revolutionary Era couldn’t have been any better,” Cody remarked.

  “At least the World Wars weren’t fought on American soil,” Caitlyn stated.

  “Maybe not the battles, but we had internment camps here for Japanese citizens and immigrants. There were a lot of things going on here because of the war. Granted, not as much as what the country went through protesting Vietnam, but still our country was turned upside down,” Jackson informed the rest of us.

  “I suppose so.” Hilary turned toward Jackson. “I guess there really isn’t a time in history that is without its own conflicts.”

  She was quiet for a moment while she and the rest of us tried to think of a time period that wasn’t wrought with some kind of misery or other.

  “What about right after the Civil War? That was a fairly peaceful time period. Oh. What did Mrs. Ulbright call it? The Industrial Era,” Hilary said.

  “You’re forgetting about Reconstruction. The South was a complete disaster after the war,” Jackson explained.

  “Okay fine, then I would stay in the North,” Hilary laughed. “But it would have to be in the fall or spring. The summer would be miserable and so would the winter.”

  “You’re not picky are you? What if you couldn’t pick the time period and just ended up some place in history? What would you do then?” I inquired.

  “Do everything I could to get back home,” Zak immediately responded.

  “That depends on where I ended up and what my social status was.” Jenna tilted her head with a slight grin.

  “You are such a snob,” laughed Kyle.

  “I am not,” Jenna declared. “I just wouldn’t want to be a maid or shopkeeper or farmer’s wife.”

  “Like he said. Snob!” Caitlyn giggled.

  The eight of us settled back down and became engrossed in the film. It was the perfect escape from all the worries and headaches that were waiting for me just around the bend. I wanted to enjoy these precious moments of tranquility with my friends because something in my gut was screaming at me that these days were about to abruptly end.

  CHAPTER 8

  Sunday, November 10, 1878

  I SLOWLY OPENED MY EYES determined to forget the images that were now burned upon my retinas. I wanted desperately to physically scrub them off my brain and erase everything I had seen since that first night. I climbed out of bed and threw on my robe. I splashed some cold water from the basin on my face trying to shock my brain into focusing on something else. Anything else.

  I sat down at my vanity and toweled off before picking up my brush and running it through my hair. My crowning glory was dull and lifeless and in dire need of being washed. But I didn’t care. I numbly went through the motions. The image staring back at me in the mirror resembled nothing of the face I once knew. It had been replaced by a thinner, paler version with heavy eyes surrounded by blackish purple puffy rings. Tears silently dripped down my cheeks yet I felt completely void of all emotion.

  I picked up the blanket off the window seat and sat back down in the same spot I had spent the previous day. However, today, the cool air creeping between the panes felt amazing on my hot skin and was a welcome friend on my exhausted soul.

  Mimi came in a little while later and exchanged pleasantries. She began changing the sheets quietly and cleaning up my room. The whole time she was busy I kept my eyes shut and rested my head against the cold window. My entire body ached, my head hurt, and I never wanted to move from this spot. I was so thankful that she worked as silently as she did.

  Mimi placed her hand gently on my shoulder when she finished her work. “How ya feelin’, child?”

  I opened my eyes and looked up at her. “Not very well.”

  She put her hand over my forehead. “M’goodness child, you’s burnin’ up! Let’s get ya back to bed.”

  She wrapped her arm around me and helped me over to my bed. “You stay’s right here, I’s be right back.” She tucked in the covers around me before she hurried out of my room.

  Seconds later I heard her voice and that of both my parents on the stairs and then they all got louder before the three of them came bustling in my room.

  “I’s know she’s gotta bad fever, Dr. Timmons.” Mimi started wringing out a rag in the basin.

  My parents sat down on my bed on either side of me. My mother started brushing my hair out of my face with her hand and smiled down at me. “Sweetheart, what is wrong?”

  “Does it hurt anywhere?” my father asked before I could answer my mother.

  “My head is killing me and my stomach hurts.”

  Mimi handed the rag to my mother who placed it across my forehead. I winced a little from the cold. All of a sudden I was freezing to death. My teeth started chattering uncontrollably and I wanted to push the rag off my head but I knew my mother would just put it back.

  “Patrick, she is burning up. What is wrong with her?” I could see the fear in my mother’s eyes.

  “Probably influenza.” My father glanced over at my mother whose hand immediately went up over her mouth.

  “Mimi, go on downstairs and tell everyone that Miss Jocelyn’s room is restricted. I do not want Miss Olivia or anyone else near her room until I know for sure what she has,” Father ordered in a firm voice.

  Mimi stepped out the door and closed it softly behind her. My eyes drifted from my father’s face over to my mother, who looked like she was ready to cry.

  “There is no need for that now, Annabelle. I am being overly cautious for Miss Olivia’s sake. Whether she has an ordinary cold or influenza, we need to keep everyone from being exposed.” He placed his hand on my mother’s arm to reassure her.

  My father instructed Mother to retrieve his medical bag and some fr
esh water for the basin. She nodded and left the room silently. He turned his attention back to me with a grim smile. “You know something, Jocelyn. I believe you have worked yourself up into feeling so poorly.”

  I scrunched my eyes up at him. “What do you mean?”

  “I think you have gotten yourself so upset about these night terrors that you have made yourself sick from worry. I know you will not talk about them with anyone, but you really should. They are obviously having more of an impact on you than you are letting on.”

  “They scare me,” I replied softly, feeling silly and childish.

  “What is it about them that frightens you so much?”

  “Many things. It is too difficult to explain.”

  “Can you try?”

  “I would rather not.”

  There was no way I could confide in my father about such things. He would certainly think I was crazy if I spoke about moving picture boxes, the strange clothes, the people, and my strange emotional attachment to them.

  “Jocelyn, you know that dreams, even night terrors, are our mind’s way of dealing with problems that we do not want to face in reality. Perhaps your dreams are trying to tell you something. Maybe there is something that you do not want to accept or deal with that your mind is telling you it is time to take that extra step.”

  “It is not like that, Father. I cannot explain to you what it is, but I can see what you are saying.”

  “I know you have been avoiding Mr. Jackson lately. Do they have something to do with him or your marriage?”

  “Sort of. I guess. In a way, but not directly.”

  “Have you tried talking with him about them?”

  “No. He has repeatedly asked because William has a big mouth, but I have told him nothing. He would not understand.”

  “You do not know that unless you have tried. Besides, it is not like you to give up on something without even trying,” he pointed out.

  “I know.” I looked towards the door at the sound of approaching footsteps.

  “Then I suggest you should and soon. Otherwise, you are going to go on feeling very poorly,” he whispered quickly before my mother reentered my room.

  ***