Finding Valor

by Charlotte Abel

  Acting on instinct, he bowed his head and kissed the top of hers. “Shh…babe. Don’t cry.”

  Channie pulled back and gazed up at him. Her tears enhanced the gem-like sparkle of her emerald eyes. “You called me ‘babe.’”

  He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Is that okay?”

  She sucked her lower lip into her mouth and nodded. “You used to call me that all the time.”

  Josh’s gaze locked onto her full, moist lips. He’d never wanted to taste anything so badly in his entire life. “I remember.”

  “You do?” Her hopeful expression stabbed him with guilt. “What else do you remember?”

  Josh would have given anything to have been able to tell her what she so desperately wanted to hear. “Can we go sit down somewhere, so we can talk?”

  “I shouldn’t let you stay.” She bit her lip and squeezed her eyes shut.

  Josh could see the internal struggle play out on her face.

  She opened her eyes and searched his then leaned around him and called out to Hunter. “We’re going inside for a little bit. Could you keep an eye out for Momma?”

  “That’s the plan.” Hunter pushed off from the tree he’d been leaning against. “Take your time. I’ll keep watch while y’all get reacquainted.”

  Channie tugged on Josh’s hand, leading him inside her rustic, but clean, cabin. The first thing he noticed was the hum of energy in the air. Magically enhanced potted plants hung from the rafters and occupied every corner, but there was very little furniture. Nothing but an old plank bench under the window next to the front door and an obviously homemade table and chairs next to an old-fashioned, cast-iron stove. The kitchen looked like something out of an old Clint Eastwood movie. The hand pump bolted to the counter next to the sink meant no running water and the soot-coated lanterns meant no electricity. Josh found it hard to believe that people still lived like that.

  Channie didn’t even glance at the chairs in the kitchen. She let go of Josh’s hand and climbed a ladder into an open loft.

  He felt weightless as he followed her. The first thing he saw when his head cleared the top rung, was Channie’s bare feet hanging over the edge of a rustic pine bed.

  Her gaze travelled the length of his body as he climbed into the loft. She patted the space next to her.

  Tendrils of gold light floated out from both their chests as a purple mist surrounded them. Love and lust. Josh’s face burned. This was it. He was going to lose his virginity…again.

  But, Channie’d asked him point blank if he remembered her and instead of answering, he’d dodged the question. She deserved to know the truth before this went any further. “Channie, I don’t remember much…about us.”

  She bit her lip then closed her eyes and nodded. “Hunter told me.”

  “What did he say?”

  “He said that you didn’t remember me, but that you still loved me.” Channie cupped the side of his face with her palm and stroked his cheekbone with her thumb.

  Josh’s chest glowed brighter, but instead of the pain that usually accompanied it, all he felt was desire. Another whole-body tremor shook his frame. If the mere touch of her hand on his face had the ability to turn his bones to water, steal his breath and render him speechless, what would happen when they actually had sex? Spontaneous combustion? He wanted to touch her, too, but his hands were shaking. “I remember bits and pieces. I remember kissing you by the side of the road and what you gave up to break the curse.”

  Channie’s lips parted as a tiny gasp escaped her mouth. She let go of his face and pressed both hands over her heart. Beams of gold light flickered between her fingers. “You shared that memory with me three days ago, through our bond.”

  Josh smiled as he remembered. “It was the most amazing thing. I was at the Lucky Pie having dinner with Mom and Elijah and thinking about you…and that kiss.”

  His gazed dropped to her mouth. He wanted to kiss her so badly it hurt. Who was he kidding? He wanted to do a lot more than just kiss her. The proof of that was growing more uncomfortable by the second. He stood up and walked to the window, surreptitiously adjusting himself. He picked at a piece of splintered wood on the windowsill.

  “I was thinking about how scared you must be and wishing that I could reassure you…that I could let you know how much…” Josh ducked his chin, but his entire head, including the back of his neck, was on fire. There was no way to hide the fact that he was blushing like a girl. He wished he weren’t so insecure. Magic warmed his gut, but refused to alleviate his anxiety. Channie’s my wife. She already knows how I feel. Just spit it out already!

  Josh lifted his gaze to the window and studied Channie’s reflection in the warped glass. It was easy to read the hope, as well as the trepidation, in her expression. He took a shuddering breath and whispered, “I wanted you to know…how much I love you.”

  She joined him at the window then put a hand on his shoulder and gently turned him around. She wove her fingers through his hair and pulled him closer until her forehead pressed against his. “I love you, too.”

  With his face angled towards her chest, it was impossible not to stare down her blouse. The soft curves of her breasts rose and fell with each breath. Josh slammed his eyes shut and tried to distract himself by continuing the story. “Anyway…while I was thinking about you, this bolt of gold light shot out of my chest. It’d been glowing and pulsing ever since I woke up, but this time was different. It was so intense it nearly knocked me out.”

  Channie slid her soft cheek against his.

  Josh’s eyes flew open and once again his gaze locked onto the swell of her breasts. They were married. There was nothing wrong with enjoying the sight of his wife’s body…so why did he feel like a such a perv?

  Her hot breath tickled his ear. “Kiss me.”

  The memory of their very first kiss in Heritage Park slipped past the barrier in his mind. He hadn’t even known her name but the desire to kiss her had overwhelmed him. He hadn’t been able to control himself then, and he didn’t want to now.

  A growl-like groan vibrated deep inside his chest. Josh dug his fingers into Channie’s hips and yanked her body against his. He froze just before crushing his lips to hers. His whole body flushed with shame as he remembered the way he’d attacked her mouth like a wild animal. He could blame that first, wild kiss on magic. She’d used a spell to make him kiss her. But there was no excuse for his current behavior. He loosened his grip and stepped back. “I’m sorry.”

  Her eyes glistened as a pink glow spread across her face. She ducked her head, hiding behind the curtain of her hair. “You must think I’m a brazen hussie.”

  “What?” Josh blinked and shook his head. Brazen hussie? “No. Of course not. You remember me…us.” He sighed. “I’m so afraid I’m going to screw this up.”

  “That’s impossible.”

  “I had a flashback of our first kiss.”

  “You already told me. Don’t you remember?” The skin between her eyebrows puckered, creating twin creases. “We just talked about it.”

  “No, not that one…our very first kiss…the one in Heritage Park.”

  “Oh.”

  Josh rubbed the back of his neck. “You didn’t like the way I kissed you then.”

  “That’s not true.” Channie peeked at him from behind lowered lashes. “I enjoyed the kiss. Until the chastity curse ruined it.”

  “I thought you’d hit me with a taser.” Josh smiled.

  Channie covered her face with her hands. “I was so embarrassed.”

  “You were? I was afraid you were going to report me to the cops or something. I was so ashamed for coming on to you like that. And then I just ran away. I should have at least tried to apologize.”

  “It wasn’t your fault.” Channie lowered her hands from her face, revealing a crimson blush. “I used a come-hither spell on you.”

  “According to Hunter, magic can’t make you do something you don’t want to do. There’s no excuse for the way I
tried to eat your face. I wish I could take it back. I wish our first kiss could’ve been like the one in Oklahoma…when we broke the curse.”

  “That was a good kiss.” The corners of her full lips parted in a shy smile. “And we’re sort of starting over.”

  Josh’s heart beat so hard, he felt it in his throat.

  Channie’s eyelids fluttered closed as she lifted her chin.

  He cupped her cheeks in his palms and sighed at the feel of her smooth, soft skin. He slid his trembling fingers into her hair and tilted her head to the side. He couldn’t believe this beautiful creature wanted him to kiss her. Blood roared behind his ears as he leaned in and brushed his lips across hers. Once, twice, then lingering on the third pass. Even with his eyes closed, he could still see the golden glow pulsing all around them, through them, flowing in and out of their bodies, mixing their energy, strengthening their bond.

  He relived the memory of their epic kiss as their hands, lips and hearts recreated it in the moment. It was even more amazing than he remembered.

  This flashback didn’t give him any extra energy. Or maybe it had and the real-life kiss consumed it and then some. It left him weak-kneed and dizzy. He pressed his lower back against the wall to keep from sinking to the floor.

  Channie threw her arms around his neck and pulled him in for another mind-blowing kiss. There was nothing chaste about that one. Her mouth parted with a whimper, inviting him in. He traced her lips with his tongue before darting past her teeth. She tasted like lavender and honey. Salt and sunshine.

  He had no idea how long they kissed, but his back and neck ached from his hunched posture. He spread his legs in an effort to lower himself to her height.

  Channie pressed a quick kiss to his mouth then leaned back and took his hand. She led him back to her bed and tugged him down beside her.

  Josh’s nerves returned with a vengeance. He focused on the magic behind his navel and tried to force another flashback…I want to remember sex with Channie. It didn’t work. I need to remember. I have to remember! Come on! Nope. Nothing. No more kisses. No wedding. No wedding night. “Channie, I—”

  She pressed a finger against his lips, silencing his protest. “Sh…don’t think about it. Just…let me love you.”

  Josh swallowed three times before he managed to croak out a single word. “Okay.”

  “I can see your heart jumping through your shirt.”

  He nodded, no longer able to speak at all.

  Her pupils dilated as she slid her hot little hands under his t-shirt. “Take it off.”

  Josh reached behind him and grabbed a fistful of fabric then pulled his shirt off over his head. Now what? He handed it to Channie.

  She tossed it over her shoulder then straddled his hips.

  Holy crap!

  She lifted the star sapphire off his chest and examined it. “What’s this?”

  “It’s an old family heirloom.” Josh was grateful for the distraction, but he had to keep Vince's identity a secret.

  “Your mother gave it to you?”

  “Does it look too feminine?”

  “It matches your eyes.” She replaced the stone then traced every muscle on his chest and abs, but stopped when she reached his navel. “Is this okay?”

  “Uh-huh.” His voice sounded like a strangled frog.

  “Do you want to take my shirt off?”

  Josh’s gaze instinctively dropped to her chest.

  Channie laughed softly then unfastened the top button of her shirt.

  She must think I’m a total dweeb. Josh lifted his hands and gently brushed her fingers aside. It took him twice as long to unbutton her shirt as it should have. But he felt a little more confident when he noticed she was trembling, too. Her skin felt like silk under his palms as he slid her shirt off her shoulders. His gaze locked onto her plain, white bra.

  She blushed and crossed her arms over her chest.

  Josh averted his eyes. “Sorry.”

  “No. It’s okay.” She lowered her arms. “I don’t know why I’m suddenly so shy.”

  Josh lifted Channie’s shirt back onto her shoulders without touching her. He kept his gaze locked on her beautiful face. “We didn’t have much time to progress…physically, before our wedding night, did we?”

  Channie shook her head. “The Book of the Dead gave us a deadline. We had to marry before the next full moon.”

  “Maybe we should take things a little slower this time?” He should probably hand in his man card for suggesting that. But he wasn’t sure how to move forward, at least not without looking like a complete idiot. Besides, Channie needed to feel loved, not just desired, right?

  She crawled off his lap and sat down beside him.

  “Come here, babe.” Josh slid his arm around her back and guided her head to his shoulder. “Let’s just cuddle for awhile.”

  ~***~

  Channie sighed as Josh pressed her head against his shoulder. She wanted to do a lot more than just cuddle—but Josh obviously wasn’t ready for more. She needed to be patient. And it did feel good to just lie in his arms and feel the beat of his glowing heart against her palm. Just the sound of his voice and the lemon and sandalwood scent of his skin comforted her. No, it was more than just comfort. He nourished her very soul. But it was selfish and dangerous to let him linger. Tears stung her eyes. “Josh, you need to go.”

  “No, I don’t.”

  Josh had never shown much concern for his own safety. She’d have to appeal to his sense of honor to convince him to leave. Even before he’d gotten his power-name, he’d never been able to ignore a threat to others. “What do you think Momma’ll do to Hunter if she finds him lurking on our property?”

  “Shep’s out there too, so it’ll be the two of them against her.” Josh frowned as he chewed his lower lip, obviously fighting Valor’s influence. “Besides they’re looking out for her. She doesn’t know they’re here. Hunter and Shep have the advantage.”

  “Is it fair to let them risk their lives so we can cuddle?”

  Josh’s energy field glowed with guilt and grief. He sighed and let his hand slide down her back. “You’re right.”

  He’s leaving. Channie’s hands seemed to have a mind of their own. They refused to let go of Josh’s shirt. This is what you wanted. Let him go.

  How many times had she given him up, knowing she’d never see him again? The first time was when she’d thought he’d gotten Kassie pregnant. Then again when she thought the Book of the Dead was demanding she marry Hunter. And the last time, when she’d bound herself to Momma with a death pledge, trading her life for his.

  She’d gladly die to save him, but she didn’t have the courage to watch him leave again. She drank in his musky scent as she pressed her mouth to his. His stubble scratched her face, but she cherished the sensation. She traced the ridges of his muscular chest then slipped her hands around his neck, holding him in place.

  He moved his hands to her wrists and tugged. “You aren’t making it easy for me to go.”

  He’s really leaving. Channie’s cry of grief sounded like a wounded animal.

  A wave of calm washed over her. Apparently Josh also remembered how to cast a be-calm spell. She slumped against his side.

  He pressed a kiss to the top of her head. “I won’t go far. I’m going to join Hunter and Shep. We’ll protect you.”

  “No!” Panic fought against the be-calm spell. She forced the words past her numb lips. “You have to leave. Momma’s too strong. You can’t save me. All you can do is save yourself. Go home, Josh. And take Hunter and Shep with you.”

  “If you know me at all, you know I can’t do that.” Josh cast another, more powerful, be-calm spell on Channie. She fought it, but it was too strong. Tears leaked out of the corners of her eyes as he tucked her into bed. He pulled the covers up, under her chin then leaned in close and whispered, “I’m sorry.”

  ~***~

  Hunter and Shep tried to talk Josh into going back inside to be with Channie, but his cons
cience wouldn’t let him. He kept in constant contact with her through their bond, but since she was unconscious, all he got was something like white noise. He checked on her in person every half hour and cast another calming spell on her around two o’clock when she mumbled his name. He resisted the overwhelming, and constant, urge to touch her. He’d lost the right to do so when he’d knocked her out.

  But when he heard Vince drive up a little before sunrise, he slid one arm under her knees, the other behind her back and lifted her onto his lap. Who knew how long it’d be until he saw her again? He held her against his chest until Hunter climbed into the loft.

  “Do you need any help getting her down?”

  “I’ve got her.” Josh stood up and shifted Channie over his shoulder, fireman-style. “Just stay below me, in case this ladder trips me up.”

  Josh took his time and made it down without any problems. He carried Channie outside and laid her on the sleeping bag in the back of the Rav4. He didn’t like the idea of Channie making the trip without wearing a seatbelt, but she was unconscious, not asleep. The shoulder harness could cut off her air supply and suffocate her without ever waking her up. He brushed the hair off her forehead then pressed his lips against hers.

  It was a long trip, so he cast one more calming spell on her. But that time, he used the sapphire to magnify and enhance his magic. “Stay asleep until you’re inside the safe house. Do what you must to stay alive, but know in your heart and mind that escape is impossible.”

  Magic surged out of his chest. Exhaustion took its place. He leaned against the side of the car, too weak to stand on his own.

  Vince grabbed Josh’s arms. “What did you do?”

  “The spell?”

  Vince nodded.

  “I used the sapphire and ordered her to stay asleep until after she was in the safe house.”

  “That was stupid.” Vince frowned at Josh. “Not only is that an open ended spell—which explains why you’re drained—but Channie won’t be eating or drinking anything if she’s unconscious. I can’t set up a safe house overnight. You need to amend the spell.”

  Josh couldn’t believe he’d done something so stupid. He took one of Channie's hands in his. “Wake up enough to take care of your bodily needs, but remain sedated. As if you’re sleepwalking.”