Dark Longing_A Novel of the Dark Ones

by Aja James

  “I love him you know,” she admitted out loud, and the confession loosened something within her.

  “That’s as it should be,” Mama Bear agreed.

  “But I think he hates me, or at least he should.”

  “Hmm,” came the circumspect reply.

  Inanna replaced her teacup on the tray, leaned back in her chair and closed her eyes. “I’ve wanted him for what seems like forever.”

  Mama Bear’s silence only prodded her to go on.

  “I feel like he’s always been a part of me. I’ve watched him and yearned for him from afar for so long… but he doesn’t know me at all.”

  She let out a burst of breath, a laugh that was half a sob. “I hardly know myself when I’m with him. I wanted him, so I took him.”

  Mama Bear maintained her silence, though the small slurping noises she made as she sipped her tea were strangely comforting.

  “And now we’re in this together and there’s no turning back.”

  “Do you regret your choice?” Mama Bear finally bestirred herself to ask.

  “Never,” Inanna replied immediately, resolutely.

  “Then the answer is simple, my dear,” Mama Bear declared, as if Inanna had actually asked her a question. “You must only look forward. The past cannot be changed, even should you wish it to. Nurture the love in your heart. Cherish the man with everything you have. If nothing else, for the next time you are sitting in that chair telling me that you have no regrets.”

  Inanna opened her eyes and looked directly at her friend, her support.

  Wise eyes looked steadily and empathetically back at her, ancient yet timeless.

  “Every so often, the Balance shifts, the Way is lost, and Devastation ensues. In this time of darkness, the Light-Bringer will rise and deliver us from lies.”

  —Excerpt from the Ecliptic Scrolls.

  Chapter Ten

  Sophia lay on her stomach on the top bunk of the double she shared with Aella.

  Her guard and real-life Amazon sat cross-legged below, communicating online through a secure channel with the Shield, the Pure Ones’ home base, currently located in Boston, Massachusetts.

  Sophia could hear the furious tapping on Aella’s MacPro, and once in a while her friend would huff a held breath, whether in exasperation, alarm, or relief Sophia didn’t know.

  Cloud had gone out earlier to rendezvous with two of the Chosen on a mission. He was also planning to meet up with their human Chevalier who had gone deep undercover in the fight clubs.

  Sophia felt frustrated that she couldn’t help much—as usual. She felt certain the vampire Queen of the Greater New York Hive, Jade Cicada, was much more purposeful and effective. Honestly, her legend preceded her.

  Jade Cicada was known in both the Pure and Dark worlds as one of the most beautiful women of all time, past and present—and likely future as well. She was sometimes capricious, sometimes deadly serious, and always awe-inspiring. She ruled her realm with a velvet-encased iron fist; those who strayed did so at their own risk, for her punishment was swift, irrefutable and inescapable.

  Sometimes, though, she liked to toy with her prey, give them a long leash, before closing in on the kill.

  Now Sophia, on the other hand, was none of those things. Half the time she didn’t know what was going on around her, and the other half she wasn’t of much help when she did clue in. She didn’t rule anybody with anything, although through some twist of fate (the Goddess had a strange sense of humor), she was chosen to be the Queen of the Pure Ones. All of them.

  And she wasn’t even one of them—yet.

  Depending on one’s perspective, she was fortunately or unfortunately still a human, with all the human vulnerabilities, fragility, foibles, but also with one major advantage. She didn’t technically have to obey the one Cardinal Rule.

  Not that she’d ever toed the line. You never knew if there was an addendum to the Zodiac Scrolls with fine print that obliterated that technicality.

  Sophia had a Pure soul. One day, could be soon, could be in the next life, though she suspected that those around her suspected that it would happen in this life, else why bother putting her on the figurative throne—she would have her Awakening and join the ranks of the Pure Ones.

  So she wasn’t all that interested in toeing the line, given what she knew of the consequences, in case the fine print on the Cardinal Rule included the likes of her.

  The Dozen, her intimate circle of protectors and advisors, tried to enable her to lead the semblance of a normal teenage life. When she wanted to do this exchange program in NYC with Columbia University, they quickly devised a way for her to do so, while keeping her safe and efficiently dealing with situations like the one that was currently brewing in the vampire world.

  It was just another brief chapter in their long, often turbulent lives.

  Sophia had a lot to learn.

  She navigated her iPad to download some new songs while she multi-tasked some research for the Ancient Persian Civ paper that was due on Monday and kept tabs on her progress in Hearthstone: Heroes of Warcraft, her earphones plugged into the device.

  Suddenly, a song started playing automatically in her ear, and an icon on the screen showed that it was downloading into her synced devices—phone, pad and pod.

  The melody and words caught her attention immediately. It also had an additive accent from background drums that seemed to inject the song’s rhythm directly into her heart.

  A webchat popup flashed in a corner of her screen with the words:

  “I have missed you, lovely Sophia. Have you missed me?”

  Sophia inhaled a startled breath and held it, lest the popup disappear and the words were a hallucination. She quickly looked down at Aella, saw that the Elite guard was preoccupied, and settled back against her pillow, focusing 100% on the webchat.

  “Are you back in Boston, Ere?” Sophia typed with two fingers on the iPad keyboard that asserted itself. That she ignored his question was a given. It was almost a ritual for them.

  “Actually, no,” he replied. “I am in the City.”

  Sophia could scarcely dare to believe it. A shot of joy bubbled within her like champagne. Just to be safe she asked, “As in New York City?”

  “Yes,” came the one word answer that all but made her squeal in delight.

  “I’m here too,” she managed to keep the exclamation mark out of the sentence. “I didn’t get the chance to tell you that I’m here on a study exchange program for a month.” Although, why she’d take the initiative to tell him and why he’d expect her to were mysteries for another day.

  “How is the Ancient Persian Civilization class at Columbia? Do take copious notes so we can see what it takes to add it to the curriculum next year.”

  Ere had been her teaching assistant for one of her classes in the Fall semester.

  “Wait, how did you know I was here at Columbia? How did you even figure out my web ID?”

  From the moment she met him, Ere enjoyed surprising her by showing up when least expected, sending her hand-written letters and mp3s. Saying outrageous things to turn her lobster red in mortification.

  “I have many skills,” was the answer that told her nothing at all. “Do you like the song?”

  Sophia had it on repeat so she could quickly memorize it. She’d memorized all of his songs. Or rather the songs he shared with her.

  She concentrated on the lyrics now even as he typed them line by line in the webchat:

  “Time Machine” —by Jason Chen

  In my head I’m going back through all the little stupid things I said

  And I’m trying to figure out the moment I lost my head

  A combination of sentences that put us in the red, in the red.

  Something inside me pushed to be right

  Until I found myself too far gone.

  If I only had a time machine

  I would take you back to the moment

  That you fell in love with me,

  A
nd stay there forever.

  Don’t you know that I’d do anything

  To make you understand,

  Understand that you are everything, to me

  If I only had a time machine.

  Love was the only thing that was ever between us,

  Now you’re miles away and I’m missing your touch

  And the pain inside is just getting to be too much, way too much.

  Something inside me had to be right

  Until I found myself in the wrong, so wrong…

  If I could go back, admit I was wrong

  I would take it all back and you’d still be mine.

  Sophia never knew why he chose the songs he did to share with her. When she had received the first one back in fall, she thought maybe it had some sort of message in it for her, but try as she might, she couldn’t figure out what it was, because the words didn’t reflect anything recognizable in their brief “relationship.” She decided that he just liked the singers or melodies and wanted to share an enjoyment with her.

  And obviously the lyrics. He always wrote out the lyrics for her even though she could have easily Googled them online.

  “Jason Chen,” she wrote, “I haven’t heard of him before.”

  “He rose to popularity singing on YouTube.”

  Ah. It was so easy nowadays to put content on the Net, and a few talented and/or lucky individuals changed their whole lives for the better because of it.

  “The version of the song I sent you is a remix on a lower key,” Ere continued to type.

  “I like it a lot,” Sophia responded. “In this version the singer’s voice almost sounds sort of like yours.”

  She blushed after she wrote that last bit, hoping he didn’t pick up on the feelings that accompanied those thoughts. She liked Ere’s voice, as she’d just implied.

  A lot.

  It was one of the most attractive things about him. And there were sooo many to choose from.

  “Alas,” he teased, and she could almost hear his affected sigh, “I do not have the talent for singing.”

  “But you have many other skills,” Sophia teased back, recalling his earlier words.

  “I do indeed,” was the reply. “Perhaps one day I shall show you.”

  Sophia’s fingers paused on the keyboard.

  Was he flirting with her again? She could never tell. A, because she didn’t have experience in this sort of thing and B, she was never clear-headed and objective where Ere was concerned anyway. Just concentrating on not making an ass of herself took all of her brain power.

  “But it is late,” he started to write.

  Sophia interrupted before he could finish his sentence, “What are you doing right now?”

  Online silence greeted her inquiry. Had he already logged off?

  “I am thinking of you, lovely Sophia.”

  Abruptly, Sophia thought of the Pure soul she sensed in him from the moment they had met. “Would you be able to meet me here in the City?” she asked rather daringly.

  Their encounters had always been orchestrated by Ere thus far. But why shouldn’t she initiate contact, Sophia thought defiantly. It wasn’t as if she were chasing after a guy she crushed on—she didn’t have the self-confidence and nerves to do that. She was just doing her job helping to recruit more Pure Ones for their cause.

  Another long silence made Sophia gnaw on her nails, which her Guardian Ayelet found to be a disgusting habit, unfit for the Queen of the race, though she only sighed in begrudging acceptance whenever she saw Sophia do it. As mentioned, her caretakers tried to let her have a normal teenage human life.

  “Do you like to dance?” Ere finally asked.

  Sort of, Sophia thought to herself. She liked moving her body to music, especially if it had a Latin beat, but that didn’t mean she was any good at it, which the question usually implied.

  “A little,” she replied to manage expectations, “is there a club nearby you want to go to?”

  “There is.”

  “Is it for twenty-one and under?”

  “I shall make sure you get in,” he promised.

  Cloud and Aella would not let her go alone, Sophia knew, but maybe she could convince them to give her some space when they came along. Maybe she could even get only Aella to escort her. The Amazon knew how to fit in no matter where she was, though she would never be one of the crowd.

  Sophia thanked her stars Dalair wasn’t the one guarding her in NYC, even as she worried and wondered how and where he was.

  “When and where?” she asked Ere.

  “I’ll message you later,” was his final reply. “Good night, Sophia.”

  Sophia turned off her iPad and switched to her iPod, lying back on her bunk and squirming under the covers.

  Before long, she was asleep, Ere’s song playing on an endless loop in her ears.

  *** *** *** ***

  When Inanna returned to the Pure Ones’ apartment, after connecting digitally with the rest of the Chosen, Cloud and Aella were sitting at right angles to each other on the sleek modern sectional in the living room, heads together in what was obviously a serious conversation.

  Their heads raised as one when Inanna entered and they got to their feet.

  “Nothing amiss, I hope?” Inanna inquired. “Or rather more amiss than it’s been.”

  “The fight clubs have gone underground—figuratively this time,” Aella responded, a slight furrow in her brow. “All of their usual channels of communication, marketing and recruiting have gone silent.”

  “Our human Chevalier on the inside is the only lead we have right now,” Cloud continued. “But I was not able to make contact with him as planned, which is a grave concern. I was, however, able to ascertain that he’s still alive.”

  Inanna nodded, taking the information in, combining it with what she knew.

  “Our Queen has dispatched the Chosen to at least freeze the progress the network has been making if not destroy it. Ryu was tasked with shutting down their virtual network, but his first priority was to infiltrate their system to see what their next moves might be. I don’t believe it’s his efforts that have led to the inactivity we are witnessing.”

  Aella shook her head in agreement. “They know we’re getting close.”

  “Closer than perhaps we realize ourselves,” Cloud said. “Maximus and Anastasia have made inroads with the mafias and gangs involved. Half of the factions are likely to back out after the visits we have paid them this night. But no one seems to know who the orchestrator may be. We were not able to track down the Russian head—his second-in-command revealed that his leader was traveling internationally, specific whereabouts unknown.”

  “Tristan and Ayelet are on their way to intercept him,” Aella added, referring to two members of the Pure Ones’ Royal Dozen. “Anything else you can share on your side?”

  Inanna gave them a rundown of Jade’s missions for the Chosen.

  “Devlin’s hunt seems to be key,” Aella mused, folding her arms. “The female vampire you encountered could be a central link.”

  “I believe so,” Inanna said. “We also have Gabriel.”

  The two Elite guards visibly straightened with alertness.

  “He’s still dealing with the transition, so he’s likely suffering from blackouts and memory loss, the human remnants and vampire side of him battling for supremacy. But once he’s stable, he might remember important clues about the other fighters, the spectators, even the vampire who bled him.”

  It was almost unnoticeable but Inanna sensed rather than witnessed the undercurrent of exchange between Aella and Cloud.

  “What is it? What are you not telling me?”

  Aella sighed. “I would rather be certain first rather than add to the confusion,” she said with some reluctance, “but suffice it to say that Gabriel might be more than meets the eye.”

  That would not surprise her, Inanna thought. She had sensed something special in Gabriel when she bumped into him six years ago at the hospital
on Christmas Eve. She just didn’t know what it was.

  All she knew was that his fate was inextricably entwined with hers. She had merely sealed it with the turning.

  Inanna hesitated before asking, “How is he?”

  Aella looked at Cloud and confirmed, “We haven’t seen him since our powwow hours ago. You were with him last.”

  “I heard him go out after two, shortly before I left for the rendezvous,” Cloud interjected, making both females regard him sharply. “He has taken my leather jacket and boots.”

  Before he finished his sentence, Inanna had exited the apartment in a blur of movement.

  In his current condition, Gabriel was extremely vulnerable and in a world of pain, both physical and psychological.

  She needed to find him before someone else did.

  *** *** *** ***

  Gabriel didn’t bother to close the jacket he was wearing over his naked chest. It was more to make him less conspicuous as he walked aimlessly along the riverside rather than a cover to shield him from the elements.

  After all, he did not mind the cold.

  The boots he borrowed from Cloud protected his feet from lacerations as he walked over rocks and glass right on the edge of the bank, but he could easily have done without them.

  What were a few more wounds compared to the ones he’d sustained already and was still healing from? And besides, his speedy recovery time in his new state of being should take care of any sores on the bottoms of his feet before they rotted off.

  Gabriel huffed a dark humorless chuckle.

  Maybe he shouldn’t test his healing abilities. After all, if his feet did rot off, he’d have to endure eternity on inconvenient little stubs.

  Where was this new wellspring of morbid humor coming from, he wondered carelessly. Maybe he was turning over a new leaf. So much for his ascetic training with the Shaolin monks. The peace and tranquility he experienced there seemed like eons ago.

  He’d always been a tightly controlled person. Simple. Sober. Temperate. Now he was the direct opposite of those adjectives.