A Love Like Ours

by Micalea Smeltzer

  Ollie looks at Liam. “There’s not a glitter bomb in here, is there? Because I’m already fabulous enough without glitter coating my body.”

  Liam laughs and shakes his head. “No glitter. Open the fucking box.”

  Ollie shrugs. “Well, since you asked so nicely.” He holds the box out to me. “Together?”

  I nod. I reach for the blue ribbon and tug until it falls into the sand at our feet. Ollie peels a corner back and then I rip a piece of the paper off. Ollie discards the rest until we’re left looking at a plain white box.

  “Do you want to do the honors?” he asks.

  I shake my head. “No.”

  He lifts the lid off and pushes aside white and blue tissue paper until he holds …

  “Plane tickets?” he asks, looking from the two pieces of paper to Liam. He squints, looking at them, and then exclaims. “To Peru?”

  “Peru,” I exclaim, reaching for the tickets.

  Machu Picchu is one of the top five places I’ve said I want to see before I die.

  Ollie hands me the tickets, and I inspect them, finding they do, indeed, list Peru as the destination.

  “Oh, my God,” I murmur.

  Liam clears his throat. “I want you both to know that you mean a lot to me, to us—” he squeezes Ari closer to his side “—and we know this last year hasn’t been easy. This is our gift to you. A chance to get away for a while, see the world, do all the crazy stuff that you guys have always talked about doing.”

  I look at Ollie, and he shakes his head, speechless for once in his life.

  “Is this really happening?” I ask softly, daring to let myself feel hope for the first time in a long time. Hope that I might be able to reclaim that carefree, bubbly girl I was before I was shot and lost my baby.

  “It really is.” Liam smiles. It’s still weird to see him smile so easily because I’d grown so used to the stone-faced prick he was before Ari. Don’t get me wrong, he’s never been a bad guy but he wasn’t always the easiest to be around.

  “Do they have Cheetos in Peru?” Ollie asks suddenly, cracking a grin. “Because you know I need my Cheetos.”

  Liam laughs and lets go of Ari, coming to stand beside Ollie. “I’ll make sure you have enough Cheetos to survive.”

  “Excellent, they’re more valuable to me than oxygen.” Ollie sobers then, no longer able to keep up the charade of class clown. “Thanks, man,” he says, and I swear there’s a catch in his voice like he’s getting choked up. “This means … a lot. More than you know.”

  Liam claps Ollie on his back. “You’re my best friend, I’d do anything for you.”

  “Stop getting all mushy and give us the cake,” Brady calls out, the crowd now dispersing since the gift has been opened. Music pumps from the speakers and it begins to feel like a real beach party.

  “Oh, yeah.” Liam grins. “The cake.”

  Ari moves aside and we get our first look at the cake.

  “Holy fucking shit.” Ollie dissolves into a fit of hysteric laughter. “That’s the greatest thing I’ve ever seen.”

  The cake has been crafted to look like a bag of Cheetos.

  Don’t get me wrong, Ollie loves his Cheetos, but I think anymore it’s become a bigger joke between him and Liam than anything.

  I shake my head. Guys are so weird.

  “I have the candles!” Jeremiah calls out above the sounds of the crowd. I look over my shoulder to see him pushing his way through the bodies. He stuffs his hands in his pocket and pulls out the pack of candles. “Thirty, right?” he jokes.

  Ollie smacks the back of his head and Jeremiah’s dreads sway.

  “I kid, I kid.” Jeremiah pushes his glasses back up his nose. “Twenty-four, I know.”

  He places the candle in the cake and I stand beside Ari. She holds a water bottle to her chest and her eyes shift around uneasily.

  “Are you okay?” I ask her.

  If there was anyone that was affected worse by what happened, it’s Ari. Her horrors started years before that night.

  She nods, forcing a smile. “Crowds still make me a little bit nervous,” she admits. “I know he’s gone, but I can’t seem to get the fear out of my head that he’s going to appear.”

  I give her a sympathetic smile. “I’m sorry. I’m … uh … here for you, you know.”

  She winces. “I should be saying that to you. I’m sorry I’ve been so suckish. To be honest, I didn’t really know what to say to you. I still don’t.”

  I shrug and wave a hand dismissively. “I’m over it.” She eyes me in disbelief. “Okay, maybe not over it, but I’m as okay as I can be. Something living on the streets taught me is that we can’t dwell on the bad things. We have to move past it. Obsessing over it isn’t going to change it or make it better.”

  “I really am sorry,” she says again, softly.

  I reach for her hand and give it a small squeeze. “I know.”

  It’ll be a while before either of us is truly okay, but I have no doubt we’ll get there in time.

  The candles are lit then, and everyone begins to sing “Happy Birthday”. Ollie holds his hand out to me and I let him pull me against his side. I laugh when we collide and he tucks me against his side.

  Sheltered.

  Cared for.

  Protected.

  Ollie is my safe haven in a world filled with violence and hate. He shows me that there are good people in the world.

  He blows on the candles, making a big production of it because this is Ollie, and then promptly smacks a sloppy kiss on my lips. I laugh, pushing his shoulder.

  “What?” He smiles innocently. “I wished for a kiss, it came true.”

  “You’re such a goof.” I shake my head, but I’m grinning.

  Liam grabs a knife and starts cutting into the cake. There’s food for everyone to eat, but everyone seems more interested in skipping straight to dessert. That’s fine by me.

  Liam hands the first piece to Ollie and a second to me along with forks.

  “You fuckers can cut your own cake.” He points to everyone else with the icing-covered knife, then promptly stabs it into the middle of the cake before walking off.

  I exchange a look with Ari before we both laugh.

  Ollie and I make our way down the beach, looking for a quiet place to sit by ourselves. We haven’t even had the chance to talk about the fact that we have tickets to Peru. We’ve talked about traveling the world together since we were sixteen, but they’ve always just been dreams. You have to have a lot of money to do something like that, and it might be only one place, but it’s a start.

  I plop into the sand, and Ollie sinks down beside me with a grunt.

  The ocean crashes against the sand and the sun begins to go down, setting the water ablaze.

  I take a bite of cake, swirling my tongue around the fork so that I’m sure to get every bit of icing. It’s the best part, after all.

  Ollie digs in his pockets and pulls out the tickets, holding them between us. “Peru,” he whispers. “I can’t believe we’re getting out of here. We need this.”

  He squints out toward the water and my heart pangs. Ollie’s been so strong the last ten months, but I know it hasn’t been easy on him, either, and in moments like this, I can see just how heavy the burden has been on his shoulders.

  “Yeah, we do,” I agree. “It’ll be fun.”

  We used to do all sorts of crazy things—living in Malibu there are plenty of things to do and anything that’s not here is not that far of a drive, but lately, we’ve both been opting to stay home instead of going out. It’s not us and I want to see us find our way back to who we used to be before the accident.

  Despite everything life threw at us at a young age, we still loved life, but losing the baby dulled that love we had, and it makes me sad. I don’t think our baby would want that—he or she would want us to be who we are, and in our hearts we’re crazy, fun-loving, adventure-seeking weirdos.

  “The tickets say we leave Wednesday,”
Ollie says, putting them back in his pocket. “Joe’s going to be pissed.” He chuckles, referring to his boss at the bike shop.

  I snort. “Joe’s always pissed.”

  Ollie shrugs and takes a bite of cake. “This is true.”

  He smiles over at me and I laugh, wiping away orange icing from his lip.

  I finish my cake and set the paper plate aside, drawing my legs up to my chest. “This is going to be good for us, isn’t it?” I ask, glancing over at Ollie.

  Ollie looks down at me, a small smile tugging on his lips. “Oh, yeah.” He reaches over and wraps a piece of my blond hair around his finger. He rubs his thumb over the piece. “We’re going to do all those things we’ve always talked about.”

  I lean my head on his shoulder, soaking in the warmth of his body. “Like climb a mountain?”

  I feel him nod. “Yeah, and snowboard with a Yeti.”

  I laugh loudly. “Oh, my God.”

  “And play cards with Big Foot. I also plan on taking the Loch Ness monster for a ride—not that kind of ride,” he adds like I need clarification.

  I giggle and sit up enough that I can press a kiss to his jaw.

  “Thank you for always being so uniquely you.”

  He grins down at me. “You aren’t sick of me yet?”

  “No.” I shake my head. “I love you too much.”

  “Good.” He lowers his head, kissing me slow and deep, stealing my breath in the process.

  When he pulls away, my brain is foggy.

  Sobering, he says, “I can’t believe Liam did all this for me. For us.”

  “Liam can be kind of a prick,” I hedge, “but he’s a prick with a heart.”

  Ollie laughs. “Truer words have never been spoken. The guy wants everyone to hate him, but it’s kind of impossible not to like him.”

  “I heard my name!”

  We both look up to see Liam, Ari, and Frieda—the dog—making their way toward us. Liam clutches two beer bottles in each hand. When they reach us, he holds out two to us.

  Ollie grabs them and hands me one of the beers. I pop the top off and take a sip, trying to hide my cringe. I’ve never been able to make myself like the taste of beer.

  “It’s your party,” Liam comments, sitting down beside Ollie, “and you’re not even participating.”

  Ollie frowns. I know what he’s thinking—this time last year the two of us would’ve been the life of the party.

  But things change.

  Ollie shrugs and takes a swig of beer, stalling for time. “Just … processing the surprise, that’s all, man.”

  Liam frowns. “You’re okay with it, right? I don’t want you to go if you’re not into it. I wanted it to be a surprise but I probably should’ve asked first,” he rambles.

  “Dude, it’s fucking amazing.” Ollie grins. “No worries there. We’ve wanted to go to Peru for a long time.”

  “You guys want to go everywhere,” Liam reminds him.

  Ollie laughs. “Yeah, well, everywhere requires more funds than we have at the moment. One day, though.”

  Ari clears her throat. “I hope you guys have fun. Send us pictures when you can.”

  “Don’t you worry, I’ll be blowing up our Instagram,” Ollie assures her. “Spam of my face, everyone wins, because who wouldn’t want to look at this?” He clutches his jaw and strikes a pose.

  I giggle and Liam shakes his head.

  “No one wants to look at your face,” Liam tells him.

  Ollie mock-gasps. “You’re just jealous because I’m the hot one of the bunch.”

  Liam shakes his head. “More like the weird one, but whatever makes you feel better.” He claps Ollie on his shoulder. “We’re heading back.” He points to the gathering. “Are you guys good here?”

  “We’re fine,” I assure him.

  He doesn’t look like he believes me but he stands and brushes sand off his shorts. Ari gives us a small smile and an awkward wave before following Liam, the dog trailing beside her. She got Frieda soon after the accident and she’s supposed to help her cope with her PTSD. She also goes to therapy twice a week. Ollie told me that Liam said she might only have to go one day a week soon, which would be great news.

  Once Liam and Ari are out of sight, Ollie says, “Come here.”

  I look at him questioningly and he parts his legs, motioning me to sit in-between them. I climb over his leg and position myself with my back against his chest so he can rest his chin on top of my head. The sun sinks some more, almost completely gone at this point.

  “The only thing sure in this world is that the sun is going to set every evening and rise every morning—that’s it. Nothing else in this world is guaranteed.”

  He wraps his arms around my body, and I scoot forward a little bit so I can recline against him more.

  “There’s one other thing,” I say, tilting my head back to look at him.

  “What’s that?”

  “That I love you.”

  He chuckles and taps his finger against my nose. “How could I forget?”

  He lowers his head, and his curls tickle my neck. “God, Tal,” he murmurs. “I could’ve lost you.”

  My heart pangs. He doesn’t talk much about that day—I think it’s easier for the both of us to brush it under the rug and pretend it didn’t happen. But it did and it left a scar on both of our hearts.

  I reach my arm up, curling it around his neck and my fingers thread into his hair.

  “You didn’t,” I whisper. “I’m still here, and I’m not going anywhere.”

  Ollie bites his lip, and it’s then that I see the tears pooling in his eyes. “I’ve never been more scared than that day I got the call you were in the hospital—and we’ve been through some pretty shitty stuff.”

  He tucks his head against my neck and I feel his body begin to shake.

  I untangle myself from his hold and turn around, sitting in his lap with my legs wrapped around his waist. I take his face between my hands and brush his shaggy hair from his eyes.

  My beautiful, funny, weird, and quirky boyfriend never cries.

  Not when we lived on the streets.

  Not when we went to bed with empty stomachs.

  Never.

  “Oliver,” I whisper and his lips quirk at my use of his full name. “I’m not going anywhere.” My voice grows even softer, and my eyes flick down to his lips and back. “The whole time I was lying on that floor in the restaurant, all I kept thinking was, ‘You can’t leave Ollie and the baby’. I fought to live for you. For both of you.” I brush my fingers over his right cheek. He swallows thickly and a tear escapes from his eye, sliding down his cheek and onto my hand.

  I’ve never spoken to him about that time I spent in the restaurant playing dead from my gunshot wound. I think he’d like to pretend that I wasn’t aware of what was happening, but I knew. I knew. “I’m too stubborn to ever leave you, so I’m afraid you’re stuck with me for the long haul.”

  He laughs then. “I like the sound of that.”

  I press my forehead against his and then I kiss him.

  I’ve kissed Ollie a thousand times since we’ve been together, more I’m sure, but every single time still feels new and different. I still get excited butterflies in my stomach, and that right there tells me I’m with the right person.

  “Come on.” I stand and hold my hand out to him. “We have a party to attend. I hear the birthday boy is smoking hot.”

  He laughs again and stands, taking my hand and entwining our fingers. “That so? I’d love to see this handsome bloke.”

  “You can’t miss him,” I say, my feet sinking into the sand. “He’s really tall, and tan, with super curly, blond hair.”

  “Sounds hot. I wonder if he’s single.”

  “No, sorry, I’m pretty sure he’s taken.” I grin.

  “Darn.” He snaps his fingers together. “You got my hopes up.”

  “Sorry.” I pretend to pout.

  Most of the party-goers dance to the music whil
e a few stand around a bonfire drinking.

  I pull Ollie toward the dancers, my hips already beginning to sway to the rhythm of the song.

  Ollie laughs when I take his shirt between my fingers, tugging him into the crowd.

  I turn around suddenly and he places his hands on my hips. I wrap my arms around his neck and we dance together, smiling and laughing.

  It feels like old times, and for the moment, the weight of the world doesn’t press upon our shoulders.

  “I hope you’re hungry; Kyle was feeling extra generous and tossed in an extra burger,” I announce, breezing into the bike shop.

  I work at a burger joint by the beach, and the bike shop Ollie works at is right across the street. On the days I work I always bring him food on my lunch break.

  It’s basically a tradition now.

  Ollie sits behind the counter, looking through a magazine filled with bikes.

  “Starving,” he answers, looking up.

  I head around to the back of the counter, taking the extra stool beside him. I place the paper bag on the counter and begin pulling out our burgers and fries.

  “Where’s Joe?” I ask.

  “Out back getting high. Like always,” Ollie answers, shoving a handful of fries into his mouth.

  I laugh. “How that man can manage to hang onto this business is beyond me.”

  “He wouldn’t without me,” Ollie answers. “The dude would forget to pay his taxes, let alone his electric bill.”

  I shake my head. Joe, the owner of the bike shop, is in his sixties with long, gray hair that looks like it hasn’t seen a brush in years, and a beard that’s almost as wide as it is long. He also always wears these awful Hawaiian shirts.

  Ollie unwraps one of the foil-wrapped burgers and lifts the bun. Wrinkling his nose, he says, “Ew, pickles, this one is yours.”

  I laugh as he slides the burger toward me with a disgusted look on his face. “Oh, come on, you know you want one.” I lift the bun off and pick off one of the pickles, dangling it in front of his face.

  He squirms away, nearly falling off the wooden stool. He grabs the counter and manages to recover himself. “Nope, sorry, but none of that nastiness will ever pass through these lips.”

  I shake my head and pop the pickle into my mouth. “Mmm,” I hum. “Delicious.”