SEAL of Approval

by Jack Silkstone

  “I’m not exactly sure how to take that.”

  He smiled. “Trust me, it’s a good thing. You’re the best thing that’s happened to me… and Axe, in a long time.”

  They reached the crest of the canyon and paused to take in the scenery. Mike dropped his pack on the ground and handed her a water bottle.

  “You know, I could be a total princess. You’d have no way of knowing.”

  “That’s what we’re here to find out,” said TJ over the covert communicator lodged inside Mike’s ear.

  Given the tiny device only had a range of a few hundred yards, he glanced around hoping to spot him. However, TJ was an experienced sniper and a master of camouflage, he wouldn’t be seen.

  Mike glanced at his watch. It was a little past midday. “You OK to step it out? We’ll make the peak in time for sunset and be back down before it gets too dark.”

  Smiling, Ali glanced back over her shoulder. “Sounds good.” She held up the bottle of water. “ You sure you don’t want me to carry something other than this?”

  “Nah, I’m good.”

  “Big strong SEAL and all that.”

  “Not at all. I’m just happy following your butt up the hill.”

  Mike’s comment was rewarding by a puking sound in his ear. Clearly his flirting didn’t impress TJ. Ali rolled her eyes and powered up the hill, leaving him in her dust. “OK, so that was cheesy,” grunted Mike as he stepped off after her.

  “No shit,” added TJ over the radio.

  ***

  It took them nearly three hours to climb to the peak of Mount Otay. When they finally reached the top they were greeted with a spectacular view across the Mexican border. Mike wiped the sweat from his brow as he dropped the heavy daypack on the ground. Ali had set a surprisingly fast pace up the mountain and, carrying the gear TJ had given him, Mike worked hard to keep up. His T-shirt was drenched in sweat and his legs were aching from the steep ascent.

  “Wow. You can literally see for miles.” She pointed at the spectacular vista stretched out before them. “That’s Mexico, right?”

  Pulling a fresh bottle of cold water from his pack he tossed it to her. “Right. I’ve gotta say, you’re fitter than half the guys on team.”

  She snickered. “As if. But, do I pass the princess test?”

  Mike raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

  “Come on.” She shot him a cheeky smile, stepped closer to him, put her hands on his hips, and kissed his sweaty cheek. “It’s pretty clear that you bought me up her to test my mettle. You’re not looking for another princess, are you?”

  “Not a chance.” He covered her lips with his.

  “You guys are making me sick.”

  This time it was Rick’s voice that startled him, transmitting through the tiny radio lodged in his ear.

  Mike made a point of prolonging the kiss for the observer’s sake. When they finally broke, he scanned the terrain around them with a critical eye.

  “What are you looking for?” asked Ali.

  “Squirrels, sneaky squirrels.”

  Rick chuckled in his ear and whispered. “That’s sneaky, secret, squirrel to you Romeo. And don’t bother looking you ain’t gonna find me, bro. I’m like a ghost.”

  “We need somewhere to set up our picnic and wait for sunset.” He pointed to a rocky outcrop with a flat patch of sand in front of it. “How about over there?”

  Mike hadn’t had time to inspect the pack TJ had given him that morning. The Chief had assured him it contained everything he needed for a romantic hike. He took out a blanket and a cooler bag filled with a selection of cold meats, biscuits, fruits and cheeses.

  As he offered her a cracker with a slice of cheddar, she whistled. “Wow, I’m impressed, sailor.”

  “So am I,” he mumbled.

  “OK Romeo, time to initiate phase two of the operation,” said Rick in his ear. “I need you to excuse yourself for a trip to the little boy’s room and head twenty yards down the hill, due east.”

  “Fine,” he mouthed.

  Ali was gazing at the horizon as she ate.

  “Hey, babe, I’ve got to duck off to the little boy’s room.”

  “You mean the little boy’s boulder.”

  “Right,” he said with a chuckle. Circling the outcrop, he started off into the scrub. After what he estimated was twenty yards, he stopped. “I’m here. Where are you?”

  He nearly leapt out of his skin when a bush in front of him materialized into a figure. It was Rick, dressed in a shaggy sniper suit.

  He grinned, revealing brilliant white teeth through the camouflage. “Hey, bro.”

  Mike shook his head. “Seriously, you guys are children.”

  “I know, isn’t it awesome.” A packet of Starburst appeared from under his camouflage and he offered one to Mike.

  After the uphill climb, sugar was exactly what he needed. He took the candy, unwrapped it and chewed. “So, what the hell’s TJ got planned now? I think Ali’s proven she’s no princess.”

  “Eh, so she climbed a hill. Let’s see how she goes with sleeping rough on a mountain.”

  “Why in god’s name would she do that?”

  “Because you’re going to feign an illness.”

  Mike shook his head. “She’s a vet bud, which is a type of doctor. She’ll see right through it.”

  “Not when you’ve got real symptoms.”

  He frowned. “Rick, what do you mean by symptoms?”

  “You know, fever, stomach cramps, dizziness.”

  “And why would I have them?”

  Rick grinned sheepishly. “Don’t blame me, this one’s on TJ.”

  Mike glanced at the Starburst wrapper he was rolling between his fingers. His stomach gurgled. Suddenly he didn’t feel well. “You sneaky motherfucker.”

  “Bro, it’s for your own good.”

  “You’re a dead man.”

  “Hey, at least this way you don’t have to pretend, because pretending is lying, Mike. And that’s bad.”

  “Mike, are you alright?” Ali called out from behind him.

  He turned to see where she was. When he looked back, Rick was gone. “You guys have taken this too far.”

  “Don’t worry. We’ll be here watching over you like guardian angels, essé,” transmitted Ernie, confirming that he was also part of the conspiracy.

  “Hells angels more like it.” As Mike ascended the slope he spotted Ali standing near the peak wearing a concerned expression.

  “There you are.”

  As he got closer she frowned. “Mike, are you OK?”

  His vision went blurry. He collapsed to his knees “No, I’m not feeling–” Projectile vomit spewed into the sand and he slumped to all fours. “Screw you, Rick.”

  ***

  The next half hour was a blur of throwing up and shivering as Rick’s concoction played havoc with his intestines. Thankfully, Ali wasn’t put off and helped him back to their picnic site where she propped him up against a rocky outcrop. She never left his side as she tried to get him to keep down water. After half an hour he was feeling slightly better but still couldn’t stand. He wanted to curl into a ball and die.

  “Mike, did you eat anything dubious in the last twenty-four hours?”

  “Define dubious,” he croaked.

  “Seafood, dairy or chicken?”

  “Um, all three.” He managed to sit up and drink some of the water she offered him.

  Ali found a medical kit in the backpack and handed him two aspirin. “This will help with your fever.”

  He took the pills before checking his watch. “It’s getting late. I don’t think I’m going to be able to get off the mountain before dark.”

  Ali wore a concerned expression as she glanced up from her phone. “Mike, I don’t have any cell coverage. Do you?”

  He managed to hand her his phone without vomiting.

  She checked. “No bars. Do you want me to run down now and get help?”

  He shook his head. “No.
The path is treacherous and it’ll be dark before you get halfway. Plus, I’m terrified of the dark, so there’s no way you’re leaving me here by myself.”

  Ali laughed. “Come on warrior, you’re not afraid of coyotes and wolves are you?”

  His eyes went wide. “You’re shitting me. There are wolves out here?”

  “Of course. I get at least one dog a week that’s been badly mauled.” She rose and started collecting dried branches from the surrounding bushes. “We’ll make a fire. It’ll keep them away.”

  He struggled to get to his feet and help. Another bout of dizziness and vomiting hit him.

  “Hey, you need to rest up. If we have to spend the night here, that’s fine. The temperature won’t drop very far this time of year. Plus we’ve got a space blanket and plenty of water.” Ali made a fist-sized pile of dried grass and placed the sticks she had collected next to it. “Do you have a lighter?”

  Mike shook his head and groaned. “Is there one in the pack?”

  “No.”

  He watched her open the medical kit and inspect the containers inside. “We do have potassium permanganate though.” She continued rummaging through the kit. “If there’s something with glycerin in it, we might be in business. Ah, huh. Jackpot!” She held up a bottle of hand sanitizer.

  “What are you going to do with that?”

  “Watch and learn.” She opened a dressing and placed it on the ground. Then she tipped some of the potassium on it as well as a squirt of hand cleaner. Using a twig, she blended the two compounds. The mixture erupted into flame and she added kindling to it. In no time she had a small fire burning.

  “Where did you learn that?”

  “I went through a survival show phase. It was a bit of an addiction.”

  Mike’s laugh turned to retching. “Seriously, I’m impressed, and a little bit emasculated.”

  “Hey, you rest up. When you’re feeling better we’ll walk out.” She wandered a few yards from the fire to collect more branches. “Oh and who’s Rick?” she asked over her shoulder. “When you were sick you kept abusing some guy called Rick.”

  “He’s a buddy of mine. I’m pretty sure it’s his cooking that did this to me.”

  “So we’ve got Rick to blame for a night out under the stars with you and the contents of your stomach.”

  “It would seem that way.”

  As the sun dipped below the horizon, Ali snuggled in next to him with the space blanket wrapped around their shoulders. With their little fire crackling in the cool evening air, they were actually very comfortable.

  “It’s so pretty out here,” said Ali as the first stars appeared in the sky. “I don’t think you should be so harsh on Rick.”

  “Yeah, we’ll see about that.” Mike slipped his arm around her back as he scanned the mountain landscape for any sign of his team-mates. “You’re all in the shit,” he mouthed.

  “You’re welcome,” responded Rick from the darkness.

  Mike subtly pried the device from his ear and buried it in the sand under him.

  “You OK?”

  “Yeah, I had a bug in my ear.”

  “You’re not having a great time up here, are you tiger?” She passed him a bottle of water.

  He rinsed his mouth. “It’s not that bad. I’ve got you here with me.”

  She patted his cheek. “You’re so sweet when you’re not puking all over the place.”

  “Oh, you had to bring that up.”

  Ali laughed. “I see what you did there.

  “I’m sorry, it just came out.”

  She snorted. “Right, no more. Topic change, how many kids do you want?”

  “Wow, trap a man on a mountain and hit him with the big ones.”

  “That’s right, handsome. You’re a captive audience.”

  “Well, I definitely want kids. But not while I’m still in the SEALs. I’m not missing out on them growing up, like my dad did.”

  “You said he was Navy?”

  “Yeah, I didn’t get to see much of him.” Mike took another sip of water. “Don’t get me wrong, he was a great father, when he was around.”

  “Is he still alive?”

  “No, cancer got him.” He handed the bottle to her. “What about you? Want kids?”

  “Three, a boy and two girls.”

  “You’ve got all this worked out, haven’t you?”

  “It’s a girl thing.”

  They sat silently gazing out over the mountains. The stars shone brightly in a cloudless sky, the lights of Tijuana sparkling along the coast.

  “You sure you didn’t plan this?” she asked, snuggling into him.

  He was thankful the darkness hid his face. “No, why would you ask that?”

  “Because this is about as romantic as it gets.”

  Chapter Twelve

  The squad was already assembled in the briefing room when Mike finally arrived at work. In the corner of the room, stood a whiteboard with his name on one side and Ali’s on the other. Under her name they’d written a list of attributes: flexible, endurance, problem solving, nurturing, not a princess.

  Under his name they’d written a single phrase: pukey whiner.

  Rick was the first to spot him. “Morning, Bear Grylls, how’d you sleep?”

  His lip lifted in a snarl. “You know exactly how I slept, douche bag.”

  Ernie snickered. “Looked pretty cozy, all snuggled up with your princess charming.”

  “Yeah, she rode in on her big white horse and saved your ass,” added Rick.

  “You guys are bastards. I’m going to pay you back for this, and when I do–”

  “Hey, Romeo,” interrupted TJ. “There’s no harm done. In fact, not only have we tested the mettle of your future wife, but we also brought you two closer. The crucible of adversity has forged a bond between you that will not easily be broken. What more could you want?”

  Mike, Rick and Ernie all stared at the craggy Chief in silence.

  “What the fuck, TJ. Have you been reading some Tony Robins shit or something?” asked Rick.

  Mike sighed. “As much as I hate to say it, he’s right. Last night Ali really came through for me.”

  “Steady on, brother. She’s through the first gateway, but we’re a long way from bashing a trident on her chest,” said TJ.

  Mike slumped into a chair. “What’s next then?”

  “A subject close to my heart,” said Rick.

  “Let me guess; some kind of gold digger test?”

  “Correct.”

  TJ flipped over the whiteboard to reveal a detailed list of actions and reactions. “Listen up, whelps, this is how it’s going down.”

  Mike held up his hand. “Stop. Can I please have one night off to take her out for dinner? You put her through hell, and she deserves a break.”

  “You sure she’s the one who needs a break?” asked Rick.

  Mike glared at him.

  TJ turned to Ernie, who nodded. “OK, tonight the GSC is on hold. But the day after, we’re back on schedule.”

  Mike nodded. Small wins were all that he was going to get at this stage.

  “Where you going to take her?” asked TJ.

  He shrugged. “I haven’t thought that far ahead.”

  The Chief fixed him with a stare. “You like this girl, right?”

  “Um, yeah.”

  “OK, an old buddy of mine owns a pretty good restaurant over in Little Italy. It’s called Just ‘n’ Thyme. I’ll give him a call and get you a table. He’s also got shares in the Old Ken cinema. Take the girl to see something nice.”

  Mike was a little taken back. TJ had just dropped the name of one of the most exclusive restaurants in the city. He knew that because Stacey had wanted to go, but they’d been booked solid for six weeks. “Thanks, TJ.”

  “No problems.” The veteran SEAL cracked his knuckles. “OK, so back to the plan. Mike, tomorrow night you’re going to cook for her, and then take the following day off.”

  Mike’s eyes narrow
ed. “There has to be a catch.”

  TJ grinned. “It’s a selection course. Hell yeah, there’s a catch.”

  ***

  As TJ briefed the squad on the next phase of the Girlfriend Selection Course the subject of their planning was chatting with her sister in the veterinary clinic’s waiting room.

  Leonie handed over a large coffee. “So, what the hell happened last night?”

  “You’re an angel.” Ali took a sip. “Where do I start?

  “At the beginning.” Leonie took a seat.

  “So, Mike took me on a hike up Mount Otay.”

  Her sister grimaced. “Really, that sounds about as romantic as dinner with Donald Trump.”

  “No. Actually, it was amazing. He packed a lovely picnic. The view was beautiful.”

  Leonie's eyebrows rose. “And let me guess, you stayed on the mountain all night making love under the stars.”

  “Not exactly.”

  “Oh god, what happened?”

  She sighed. “Mike got hit with a bad bout of food poisoning. He was vomiting and dizzy, the works. We had to spend the night out in the wilderness.”

  “What a nightmare.”

  “Not at all, it was kind of nice. I lit a fire and we talked until he fell asleep. By morning everything was fine.”

  “So, you nursed him all night. What can I say. Honey, you're a sucker for a wounded critter.”

  “I got the feeling that the whole climbing the mountain thing was a bit of a test.”

  Her sister grinned. “And you passed it with flying colors. So what's next? When are you going to see this super stud again?”

  “Well…” Her eyes sparkled. “Tonight, he’s taking me out to apologize for the mountain fiasco.”

  “Oooh, where you going?”

  “Just ‘n’ Thyme.”

  “Get out of town. How’d he get a booking at such short notice?”

  She shrugged. “I have no idea. Then we’re going to a rom com at the Ken Cinema.”

  “Girl, this boy is pulling out all the stops. You’re going to get yourself some sweet loving tonight, and I want all the juicy details.”

  “You're incorrigible.” She took another sip of the coffee. “Now, what's going on with you? How did the girl’s camp go?”