Life Or Something Like It

by Annie Lyons

  ‘Here you go. Oh are you on Twitter?’

  ‘Thanks,’ said Cat taking her coffee. ‘Yes, I use it a lot for work. It’s great.’

  Claire smiled. ‘I’ve never really go into all that. Don’t have the time with the kids to be honest.’

  ‘I can imagine,’ said Cat. ‘Four kids must keep you busy.’

  Claire looked surprised. ‘No, I’ve only got Izzy and James. That’s quite enough for me!’

  ‘But what about…’ Cat wracked her brains for the names ‘…Daisy and Finn?’

  Claire laughed. ‘They’re not kids, well Daisy is but Finn’s her uncle. He looks after her. They’re coming along today but Finn’s always late.’

  ‘Oh I see,’ said Cat, feeling wrong-footed.

  Claire grinned at her. ‘Don’t worry, you’ll love Finn. All the mums do. To be honest, if I wasn’t married I’d be very tempted.’ She gave Cat a sly look. ‘Are you single by any chance?’

  Cat gave a little cough. ‘Yes but – ’

  ‘Ladies? Sorry I’m late. What have I missed?’

  Claire gave Cat a nudge as they both looked up into the grinning face of a scruffy man with a mess of hair and an unkempt beard. ‘This,’ she said with grin, ‘is Finn.’

  For the second time that day, Cat experienced an acute sense of déjà vu as she shook Finn’s hand and was struck by how cool his touch was. ‘Hey,’ he said, regarding her with a smile. ‘I think we may have met before. Did you ever get that snot off your jeans?’

  Cat looked into his pale blue eyes, which were glittering with amusement, and an unwelcome recollection came to mind. He was the show-off who had appeared to sit in judgement of her at Ellie’s birthday party – the one who was happy to sit on the filthy floor with a group of small children and expected everyone else to want to join in. He had that all-knowing air of someone who thought that everyone else had missed the point. Cat found it highly irritating now as she had done then.

  Claire laughed. ‘Oh you two already know each other, do you? Well then, that’s a good start.’ She winked at Cat.

  ‘We only met briefly at Ellie’s birthday party,’ said Cat with a cursory smile.

  Finn clutched his heart as if he’d been shot. ‘Oh wow. Talk about dashing a guy’s hopes. And there was me thinking we had something.’ He gave Claire a mischievous grin. She giggled like a schoolgirl and Cat bristled with annoyance. She could see how this man would provide a pleasant diversion in the life of a stay-at-home mother – a little bit of banter and low-level flirting – but really, she found his smug confidence plain annoying. He was like the cock in a farmyard full of hens and for Cat the emphasis really was on the word ‘cock’.

  ‘I need a wee,’ said Ellie, wriggling her way over to Cat.

  ‘Me too,’ said Izzy brightly.

  ‘And me,’ said Daisy.

  Cat was almost grateful to be given the opportunity to leave Finn’s company but it was Claire who leapt up. ‘I’ll go,’ she said. ‘You two stay and chat.’ She emphasised the last word with a nod and a raised eyebrow.

  Cat kept her eyes fixed forwards to where Charlie and James were playing football. She noticed Finn glance over at her but didn’t feel the need to make eye contact. She would be having words with Andrew. Cat knew how his mind worked and she could bet he’d had an idea to do a little casual matchmaking whilst she looked after his kids. Why did the world have to pair all the single people off? Why couldn’t it mind its own bloody business? She felt her phone buzz with a call and gratefully extracted it from her handbag. She smiled as she saw the caller ID. She made an ‘excuse me’ face to Finn, who gave her a casual nod in reply.

  ‘Hi, Jesse,’ she answered.

  ‘Hey, Kit Kat. How are you?’

  ‘Itching to get back to work to be honest.’

  ‘Yeah, of course. I understand and we miss you a lot. Listen, I don’t really want to talk about it over the phone. Can you come to dinner tomorrow night?’

  ‘I’d love to.’ Cat smiled. Tomorrow was Friday night and she would officially be off duty. She longed to see Jesse too. She missed seeing him every day.

  ‘Great. Can you come to the house say around eight-ish? I think Alex is going out so we’ll be able to talk properly.’

  ‘Absolutely.’

  ‘Cool. Can’t wait to see you, Kit Kat.’

  ‘Me too,’ she said. ‘Bye.’ She finished the call and turned back to Finn. ‘Sorry about that. I had to speak to my boss.’

  ‘That was your boss?’ said Finn surprised. ‘I thought it was your boyfriend.’

  ‘No-o,’ said Cat quickly. ‘He’s not my boyfriend.’

  Finn raised one eyebrow. ‘But you’d like him to be?’

  Cat regarded him with a frown. ‘I’m sorry, I wasn’t aware that I’d ordered a psychologist.’

  Finn grinned. ‘Apologies. I do that sometimes. If you don’t want to talk about it, that’s cool.’

  Cat folded her arms and studied her phone. ‘I do not want to talk about it.’ She flicked to her Twitter feed and started to read.

  ‘So Andrew told me you work in PR but that you’re taking a little break,’ said Finn.

  Cat looked at him, expecting more judgement, but the question appeared to be genuine. ‘I made a mistake.’

  ‘We all make mistakes,’ said Finn. ‘What did you do?’

  ‘I was involved in the Diaz launch,’ she said, glancing up at him ready for a reaction. Finn looked blank. ‘You know, Alvarro Diaz? The footballer?’

  ‘Of course,’ said Finn. ‘He’s one of the best attacking midfielders in the world.’

  ‘If you say so. Well you know that coffee company launch that went spectacularly wrong?’

  Finn was squinting at her now. ‘No.’

  Cat was amazed. ‘How could you not know about that?’

  Finn shrugged. ‘I like football but I don’t really care what the footballers get up to. Was it bad?’

  ‘It was very bad,’ said Cat. ‘And I had to step down from my job but hopefully not for long.’

  ‘I’m sorry to hear that,’ said Finn.

  Cat could tell that he meant it and decided to be civil. ‘So you look after your niece, do you?’ She couldn’t hide the surprise in her voice.

  ‘Do you find that hard to believe?’

  ‘Well I suppose it’s unusual.’

  ‘I love it,’ he replied. ‘It helps out my sister, Ronnie, while she’s at work and I get to have all the fun.’

  ‘Good for you,’ said Cat. ‘I love my job too.’

  ‘And what about this temporary arrangement?’

  Cat gave a little cough. ‘It’s proving to be an education.’

  Finn laughed. ‘You’ve just got to relax and go with it.’

  Cat was irritated by the insinuation that she wasn’t able to do this but their conversation was interrupted by the return of Claire and the girls.

  ‘Turned out to be a bit more of a lengthy visit than I’d hoped,’ she said cheerfully. ‘How about we find somewhere for a picnic, maybe on the patch of green outside the playground?’

  ‘Yay, picnic!’ cried Ellie.

  Cat went to grab the picnic bag but Finn got there first. ‘Allow me,’ he said with a smile, walking towards the gate. ‘Boys! Food time!’ he cried. Cat noticed with secret envy how Charlie and James nodded and followed without argument.

  Claire nudged Cat as they walked behind. ‘So-o, what do you think? He’s gorgeous, isn’t he?’

  Cat didn’t want to get into a debate about the relative merits of this man. ‘Absolutely,’ she said flashing her best PR smile.

  They spread two large picnic blankets under a large oak tree and the adults started to unpack the food. Cat opened the bag Andrew had prepared and peered at the sandwich fillings.

  ‘I think there’s tuna or cheese,’ she said to the children.

  ‘Isn’t there any ham?’ asked Charlie.

  Cat could see this was another test and she wasn’t really in the mood. ‘No. T
here’s cheese or tuna,’ she said firmly.

  ‘Swap you,’ said Finn, holding out his sandwich to Charlie and smiling at Cat.

  ‘It’s okay, Finn,’ said Charlie, his neck flushing pink.

  ‘Seriously, mate. I’d rather have cheese.’

  ‘Are you sure?’ asked Charlie.

  ‘Yep. Here you go.’

  ‘Thanks,’ said Charlie.

  Cat should have probably been grateful for this intervention but in truth she found it annoying. She ate her own sandwich in silence whilst Claire and Finn chatted. Ellie and her friends munched happily on their sandwiches. When she had finished, Ellie came and sat very close to Finn.

  ‘Hey, Miss Ellie. I haven’t had a chance to talk to you today. How’s tricks?’

  ‘Tricks are fine, thank you, Finn. Do you like my Auntie Cat?’

  Finn glanced up at Cat, his eyes sparkling with amusement. ‘Well I don’t know. What do you think?’

  Ellie thought for a moment. ‘She’s actually okay. She took us to a really nice restaurant yesterday but I was sick.’

  ‘Oh that’s a shame.’

  ‘Yes it was. Do you think you might want to marry my Auntie Cat?’

  Cat nearly choked on the remainder of her sandwich and Finn laughed. ‘I think it’s too soon to say but probably.’

  Claire grinned at Cat. ‘Good for you, girl.’

  ‘I’m glad my future is all sorted then,’ said Cat shaking her head.

  ‘You should be. I’m quite a catch,’ joked Finn.

  After lunch, Cat went to buy more coffee and ice-creams for the children. When she returned, she noticed that Finn had joined the boys in a game of football. He had also picked up her beloved Kelly bag to mark the goals. ‘We needed some goalposts,’ he said with a grin. ‘You don’t mind, do you?’

  It was said as a challenge. Charlie was watching her with scowling expectation. She couldn’t refuse. ‘Okay,’ she said. Never mind about marrying him, she was starting to hate this man.

  They ate their ice-creams quickly and went back to the game. The girls had picked handfuls of daisies and were attempting to make daisy-chain bracelets. It made Cat falter for a second as she remembered making them as a child; why did every innocent activity she undertook with the kids bring back a forgotten memory? She sat a little distance away and watched as Claire showed them how to thread one stem through another. Cat closed her eyes and let the sun wash over her for a moment. She felt someone standing quite close to her and opened her eyes to see Ellie’s friend Daisy holding out a neat little bracelet of flowers. Cat hesitated for a second, so the little girl shoved it under her nose.

  ‘I made it for you,’ she said seriously. ‘You looked sad and I thought you would like it.’

  Cat was amazed and touched. ‘Thank you, Daisy. That’s very sweet of you.’

  ‘I made you one too,’ said Ellie, pushing her way forwards.

  ‘And me,’ squeaked Izzy.

  Claire laughed. ‘Nice to be popular, eh?’

  ‘Yes,’ said Cat, her voice wavering a little. ‘Yes it is. Thank you, girls.’

  ‘S’okay. Come on!’ cried Ellie as they skipped back to Claire.

  Cat felt flustered by her reaction and decided to distract herself by checking her phone.

  ‘You’re a slave to social media, aren’t you?’ said Finn jogging over, picking up a water bottle and taking a deep gulp.

  ‘I’ll have you know that social media is the thing that makes the world go round,’ she said.

  ‘Is it indeed? Isn’t it just for needy people with low self-esteem constantly searching for some meaning in their lives?’

  The comment was teasing but it made Cat bristle. ‘Actually, it’s very useful and necessary. It has helped people start revolutions and change the world.’

  ‘Oh right.’ Finn grinned. ‘How many revolutions have you started then?’ he quipped before jogging off to join the boys again.

  Cat was furious. She could honestly say that she’d never met such an irritating man in her life before. She stared back at her phone. Today was the day of the Paradise Rivers perfume launch and her feed was awash with comments from supporters and trolls. The reality TV star was trending and if she had been at work, Cat would have been delighted with this result. Today, however, she felt dissatisfied. She threw her phone to one side and turned her attention to the boys’ football game. Charlie had just scored a goal, shooting the ball past James. Finn cheered and gave him a jubilant high five. Cat found his exhibitionist chumminess with the kids beyond annoying. She couldn’t believe the magnetism he seemed to have over people. She liked Claire but she could honestly say that she wouldn’t be in a hurry to meet up with Finn again.

  At that moment she noticed a small dog running towards them. She watched in horror as it made a beeline for her handbag. The world seemed to move in slow motion and Cat couldn’t act in time to prevent the horror of the dog firstly sniffing and then lifting one of its tiny back legs before neatly peeing all over her prized possession.

  Charlie and James fell about laughing. To his credit, Finn did shout at the dog and shoo it away but even he was suppressing a snigger as he carried the offending article back to Cat.

  ‘You might want to wipe this,’ he chuckled.

  ‘Oh no!’ cried Claire, rushing over with a packet of wipes. ‘That looks like a nice bag. Was it expensive?’

  ‘Yes, yes it was,’ said Cat weakly as she observed the urine-soaked green leather.

  ‘First rule of looking after kids,’ said Finn cheerfully, ‘never bring or wear anything that you aren’t prepared to take home covered in urine, poo, vomit or a combination of all three.’

  ‘I’ll bear that in mind,’ said Cat through gritted teeth.

  On the way home Ellie declared it to be ‘the best day ever’, and even Charlie seemed cheerful.

  Later that evening, Cat sat in the garden with her brother, nursing a glass of wine. ‘So,’ he said innocently, ‘what did you make of Finn?’

  ‘Smug, irritating and a know-it-all,’ declared Cat.

  ‘Right,’ said Andrew. ‘So you quite liked him then.’ Cat stuck out her tongue. ‘Still. The kids enjoyed it and at least you didn’t have to deal with any vomit today.’

  ‘No just dog’s urine,’ she observed. ‘Anyway, things are improving. Ellie told me I was “okay”.’

  ‘Praise indeed.’ Andrew smiled. ‘Well I think you’re doing a great job, sis,’ he added, knocking his glass against hers.

  ‘I’m learning to go with the flow,’ said Cat.

  ‘Sounds like something Finn might say,’ observed Andrew.

  Cat frowned. ‘Don’t be ridiculous.’

  Chapter Six

  Cat paid the cab driver, adding a generous tip in recognition of the terrible Friday night traffic, and stepped onto the pavement, tucking the wine bottle under her arm. She looked up at the three-storey Notting Hill townhouse. The west London location had been the choice of Jesse’s wife, Alexandra, after she saw the movie of the same name and decided that if it was good enough for Hugh Grant and Julia Roberts then it was definitely good enough for Alexandra Lorenzo. Jesse had been desperate to make his supermodel wife happy and gave in quickly, despite the property’s impractical positioning for Hemingway Media’s east London offices.

  Even though she travelled the globe, Alexandra had a strong sense of home and had wanted to settle somewhere not too far from her family back in Barcelona. She also found the British reserve to be at odds with her passionate Spanish nature but Notting Hill had its own cosmopolitan identity where you could be who you were, particularly if you were rich. The house had been her project, not that she had broken a nail over it, but she had enjoyed working with the best architects, project managers and interior designers money could buy.

  Cat climbed the steps, rapped the heavy lion-faced knocker and took a step back. Warm light pooled out from the wide oak-floored hall as an attractive young girl dressed all in black greeted her with a smile.
r />   ‘Good evening. May I take your coat?’ she asked. Cat felt her insides sink. She’d thought this was going to be a relaxed Friday evening with her old friend but was starting to smell a rat.

  ‘Thank you,’ she said, stepping inside, putting down the bottle on the ornate hall table and slipping off her coat. She was glad now that she had decided to wear a dress.

  Huge photographs from shoots Alexandra had done for Vogue, Harper’s and Tatler lined the walls, along with the pictures of Jesse and Alexandra, which Mario Testino had taken as an engagement present. Cat looked at herself in the hall mirror, smoothing a stray strand of hair and checking her teeth for lipstick.

  ‘Cat, I am so glad you are here,’ cried Alexandra, emerging from a door to the left of the hall. ‘Is that a Diane von Furstenberg? I think I have it in green,’ she added, reaching out a hand to stroke the sleeve of Cat’s purple tunic dress as she casually kissed Cat on both cheeks and then once again for good measure.

  ‘It is. It’s good to see you, Alex. Jesse said you had to go out so this is a lovely surprise. I didn’t realise it was a dinner party though. I would have made more effort,’ said Cat, smoothing her dress self-consciously and glancing at the waitress.

  ‘Nonsense, Catereen, you look as stunning as ever,’ said Alexandra, who really did look stunning. She was wearing a low-cut figure-hugging catsuit made of red silk. Her mane of dark hair caressed her shoulders and her face was perfect: dark eyes, a delicate nose and plump kissable lips. Her feet were bare but her toenails were painted gold and her olive skin seem to glow with deep radiance. It was no wonder she featured every year in any poll listing the world’s sexiest women, usually in the top ten.

  Cat smiled. When she first met Alexandra five years ago, she had made a conscious decision not to be intimidated by her beauty. There was no point in Cat’s line of work. You were the facilitator and guide; these people walked a different path. Besides, she liked Alexandra. She wasn’t like some supermodels she’d met; she had a genuine side and always looked after those who mattered to her. She had bought homes for all her family and some friends as well. The fact that she was married to the man whom Cat loved was not her fault and, anyway, Cat knew that it was more the idea of Jesse that she loved. He was her archetypal ideal man and everyone knew that ideals rarely existed in real life. She was also genuinely happy for Jesse and Alex. They were her friends and she wanted them to be happy. ‘I’m afraid I only brought this,’ said Cat, holding out a cheap bottle of wine. It had been a joke for Jesse’s benefit – a reference to cheap plonk being the only thing they could afford as students.