Secrets of the Heart

by Al Lacy

  Loretta kissed him on the cheek this time and said, “It’s the sunshine on your hair. Some people say heaven’s angels have a light around their heads. The light is called a halo. That’s what your blond hair looks like when the sun shines on it.”

  Caleb wrapped his arms around her neck and kissed her cheek, saying, “I love you, Mommy. You’re the best mommy in all the world, an’ I love you with all my heart!”

  They held on to each other, then Loretta said, “Mommy’s got to go to the kitchen and peel some onions, potatoes, and carrots for supper.”

  As she stood up, Caleb looked at her swollen middle. “How long is it till my baby brother is gonna be born?”

  Loretta winced as a sharp pain ran across her back. “Just about four weeks, honey. But Caleb…”

  “Yes, ma’am?”

  “I’ve told you many times that it could be a little sister. I know you want a little brother to play with, but you can play with a little sister, too.”

  “But not cowboys an In’ians. Only boys play cowboys an In’ians.”

  “But you would love the baby if it turned out to be a girl, wouldn’t you?”

  “Uh-huh. Only I know it’s a boy.”

  Loretta smiled to herself. “Are you going to stay outside or are you going in the house with me?”

  “Could I help you fix supper?”

  “I’m sure I can find something for you to do.”

  “Okay. That’s what I’ll do.”

  Caleb took his mother’s hand as if to help her through the door. Just as they stepped inside, Hilda said, “I’m all through for the day, Loretta. I’ll be going now. Hello, Caleb.”

  “Hello, Mrs. Jensen,” the boy said politely.

  “Thank you, Hilda. You sure do a wonderful job. Has your arthritis been bothering you today?”

  “Quite a bit, honey,” said the gray-haired woman, rubbing her right arm and shoulder. “I sure hope you’ll be able to take over the household duties shortly after the baby is born. I’m not going to be able to do it much longer.”

  “There’s no reason I can’t,” said Loretta. “Once the baby’s born, I’m sure I can handle it.”

  “I’ll help her, too,” put in Caleb. “I’ll take care of my little brother so Mommy can do the housework an’ the washin’ an’ stuff.”

  Hilda glanced at Loretta, who shook her head and looked at the ceiling.

  “I know you’ll be a great help to your mother, Caleb,” Hilda said, patting the top of his head.

  “I sure will! I’m gonna teach my brother how to play cowboys an’ In’ians, too!”

  Hilda did a quick calculation and realized that Loretta was now better than a month past the time in her pregnancy when she’d lost the other two babies. “I’m glad you’re doing so well, honey,” she said. “Looks like you’ll go full term on this one.”

  “I’m very encouraged,” Loretta said, smiling. “Everything’s going to be all right this time.”

  Tom Harned arrived home at suppertime and was greeted with a big hug by Caleb, and a hug and kiss by his wife.

  During supper the Harneds talked about the new baby and Hilda’s worsening arthritis. Loretta assured him she could handle the housework once the baby was born.

  When the meal was over, Tom helped Loretta do the dishes and clean up the kitchen. He was just drying the last dish when there was a knock at the front door.

  “I’ll get it, honey,” he said.

  A man and woman in their midthirties stood on the front porch. “Mr. Harned?” the man said. “Yes.”

  “My name is Bruce Humbert, sir, and this is my wife, Laurie. I have just become pastor of the church here in town. Laurie and I are visiting everyone in Virginia City to get to know them.”

  Tom reached out and shook hands with both of them. “Please, come in,” he said. “My good friend Hank Mitchell and his wife, Donna, are members of the church. Hank told me a new pastor was coming.”

  As Tom closed the door behind the Humberts, the preacher said, “The Mitchells told us about you and your family. They were especially wanting us to visit you.”

  Loretta came into the parlor with Caleb, and Tom introduced them to the Humberts.

  The preacher smiled and ruffled the boys hair. “I like the name Caleb. Its a Bible name.”

  “We named him after one of Loretta’s uncles,” Tom said.

  Everyone sat down, and Laurie turned to Loretta. “When’s your baby due, Mrs. Harned?”

  “In just about four weeks.”

  “I’d be very happy to help you in any way I can when the baby comes.”

  Loretta smiled. “I just might take you up on it.”

  “Please do. I really mean it.”

  Tom looked at Humbert appraisingly and said, “Loretta and I know that Virginia City has been tough on preachers. From what Hank and Donna have told us, the last two got so discouraged they just gave up and left town. Do you think you can take the rough treatment the miners will put on you, Pastor Humbert?”

  Humbert grinned. “I’m willing to try. I’ll preach the gospel of Jesus Christ and do everything I can to get the people of this town saved. Death comes to all, and eternity’s beyond that. I want to keep as many people from going to hell, and take as many with me to heaven, as I can.”

  Neither Tom nor Loretta commented.

  Humbert went on. “Hank and Donna told us they’ve talked to both of you about salvation.”

  “Yes, they have,” said Tom, “but we don’t look at it like the Mitchells do.”

  “How’s that?”

  “Well, Hank and Donna say we have no chance to go to heaven when we die unless we repent of our sin and open our hearts to Jesus Christ.”

  “And how do you look at it?” Humbert asked.

  “Loretta and I believe that we’ll go to heaven when we die because we’re good, honest people, and we live moral lives.”

  “Are you sinners?”

  “Well…yes. We don’t always do everything right.”

  “What about your sins? Is God going to let you into heaven with your sins on your record?”

  “Well…I…uh…”

  The preacher pulled a small Bible from the inside pocket of his suit coat and said, “Mind if I read to you what God says about it?”

  Tom glanced at Loretta, then turned back to the preacher. “No, go ahead.”

  Humbert read several Scripture passages describing mankind’s sinful condition. Then he said, “Mr. and Mrs. Harned, the apostle Paul tells us in the book of Romans that the gospel of Christ is the power of God unto salvation to everyone who believes it. And in 1 Corinthians Paul gives us God’s definition of the gospel, when he writes that ‘Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures; and that he was buried, and that he rose again the third day according to the scriptures.’

  “Jesus literally died and was buried. But a dead Christ could save no one. He broke the bands of death and came out of the tomb. He’s alive to save all who will believe and repent of their sin and put their faith in Him alone to save them. In the gospel there’s not one mention of our good works or religious deeds such as baptism, communion, church membership, and the like. The most righteous deeds we can perform are filthy rags before God. There’s no way we’re going to live good enough to get ourselves to heaven. Salvation is open to everyone who will put their faith in Jesus and Him alone to save them.”

  “Pastor,” Tom said, “the Mitchells have shown us this before, and we understand it, but Loretta and I will tell you, as we’ve told Hank and Donna, you have your way of believing about God, and we have ours.”

  Bruce Humbert’s heart was heavy. “But our way of believing is based on the Word of God, Mr. Harned. What’s yours based on?”

  Tom blinked and looked around for a moment, then settled his gaze on Loretta as he said, “Just how we feel, sir. The gospel trail’ simply isn’t our cup of tea. But I’ll tell you what I’ve told Hank over and over again. I appreciate your caring enough about us to give us y
our point of view.”

  Pastor Humbert returned his Bible to his coat pocket and said, “All I can do is ask you to think on what I’ve shown you from the Bible and invite you to come to church and listen to me preach. Will you do that?”

  “We’ll think on it, Pastor,” Tom said. “And who knows? Maybe one of these days we’ll pop in and surprise you at church.”

  Humbert rose to his feet. “You folks have been very kind to listen, and I thank you.”

  Laurie moved to Loretta’s side and said, “Mrs. Harned, please let me help you if there’s anything at all I can do after the baby comes.”

  Loretta struggled to her feet and smiled at Laurie.

  “I’ll do that, Mrs. Humbert. And thank you.”

  SUNRISE STREAKED ACROSS LAKE MICHIGAN in sheets of vivid colors under a buttermilk sky, tinting the city of Chicago a reddish gold.

  Peter Stallworth opened his eyes as the brilliant colors streamed through the bedroom windows. Kathleen was stirring next to him, making little sounds that indicated she was coming awake.

  Peter rolled out of bed and padded to the closest window. He stood in awe at the glory of the sunrise and turned to see his wife blinking her eyes as she tried to focus on him.

  “Kathleen,” he said, a lilt in his voice. “Come here and look at this!”

  The beautiful redhead covered a yawn, threw back the covers, and picked up her robe. Just as she reached the window, Peter took her by the hand and put an arm around her waist. “Set your peepers on that sunrise, honey!” he said.

  Its graphic beauty put Kathleen in awe. “Oh, Peter! Isn’t it marvelous!”

  “I’ve seen a lot of sunrises in my time,” he said, “but this one tops them all.”

  “I won’t disagree, but do you really want to see something beautiful?” She took his hand. “Come with me.”

  Together they moved into the hall and paused at the open door of the adjoining room. Four-year-old Meggie Stallworth lay in her bed fast asleep. Her long, jet black hair was spread in sharp contrast over the white pillowcase, and her perfect ivory complexion and long eyelashes capped off the picture of elegance and grace.

  Kathleen laid her head against Peter’s shoulder and whispered, “Now that’s beauty!”

  “She’s a living doll—the epitome of beauty, just like her mother.”

  Kathleen smiled and raised up on tiptoe to kiss his prickly cheek. “I’ll get breakfast started while you shave,” she whispered.

  She remained at Meggie’s door as Peter disappeared into their room. She gazed for a long moment at her daughter and thought of how much Meggie’s grandparents loved her, though they still barely tolerated the daughter-in-law who had brought Meggie into the world. Kathleen had learned to live with the situation, and she would continue to bear it for Peter and Meggie’s sake.

  The kitchen was a cheery place as the morning sunshine streamed through the sparkling windows. Kathleen hummed a lively Irish tune as she put breakfast on the table: buttermilk pancakes with lots of butter and maple syrup—one of Meggie’s favorite meals.

  Earlier, while the fire was heating up the stove, Kathleen had gone back to Meggie’s room and found Peter holding her in his arms. Father and daughter adored each other, and Kathleen was thrilled to see the love that had developed between them.

  Mother and daughter had a special relationship also, and it seemed their hearts were knitted closer with each day.

  While she poured coffee for Peter and herself and milk for Meggie, Kathleen thought of how happy the three of them were; she was grateful there was only one small cloud hovering over her world. Well, make that two small clouds. One was the Stallworths’ continued sour attitude toward her. The other was that she had not been able to conceive again. She dearly wanted to give Peter another child.

  She heard familiar footsteps in the hall and put aside the trouble-some thoughts.

  While they ate breakfast, Peter said, “Honey, I’ve been meaning to tell you, I think there might be a crack in the wall my parents have put up against you.”

  “Really? In what way?”

  “Dad has said things at the office about private conversations he and Mom have had. They agree you’ve handled the burden they put on you quite well, and a wee bit of admiration has crept into their attitude toward you.”

  “Oh, Peter, that’s good to hear,” she said, her eyes moistening with tears.

  “I’m thinking that maybe one day soon they’ll actually accept you as their daughter-in-law.”

  As Kathleen used a napkin to sponge away her tears, Meggie said, “Daddy, why don’t Grandma and Grandpa ever hug Mommy?”

  Kathleen flicked a warning glance at Peter.

  “Well, sweetheart,” he replied, “Grandma and Grandpa have some funny ideas. They think that since Mommy didn’t come from the part of town where they live, she doesn’t really fit into the family, so they have been slow to accept her.”

  The lovely child’s brow furrowed. She cocked her head to one side and said, “We don’t live where Grandma and Grandpa live, but they hug you and me, Daddy. Mommy lives here too, so why don’t they hug her?”

  “Meggie,” Kathleen said, “do you remember that today, while Daddy is at work, you and I are going shopping together?”

  The child’s big blue eyes brightened. “Oh, yes! You said you would buy me something, Mommy! What are you going to buy me?”

  Kathleen left her chair, bent over and hugged her daughter, then kissed her soft, smooth cheek. “If you’ll be real good, I’ll buy you something very, very special.”

  “What?”

  “Right now it’s a secret, but like I said, if you’ll be very, very good, you’ll know what the secret is when we get to a certain store downtown.”

  Peter finished his coffee, and said, “Kathleen, you do remember that Derek Walton and Jack Ballard and I have to work late tonight?”

  “Yes, darling. You’ll remember to eat some supper, won’t you?”

  “Sure. It won’t be like your cooking, but well grab some supper at one of the cafés near the office.”

  “Did you say you’ll be home about ten-thirty or eleven?”

  “That’s right. So you kiss my baby daughter good-night for me just before she goes to sleep, and I’ll sneak into her room and kiss her when I get home.”

  “Daddy!” gusted Meggie, “I’m not a baby anymore! I’m a big girl. I’m four years old!”

  Peter reached over, gently pinched her round little cheek, and said, “Sweetheart, no matter how old you get, you’ll still be Daddy’s baby girl!”

  Kathleen and Meggie hugged and kissed Peter, waving at him as he drove away in the carriage.

  “All right, Miss Meggie,” Kathleen said, “let’s get this kitchen cleaned up so we can go shopping.”

  They arrived downtown at a little after ten o’clock that morning. Their first stop was at DeLand’s Department Store, Meggie’s favorite.

  “Mommy, is this the store where you’re gonna buy me my special s’prise? I’ve been good. I helped you clean the kitchen.”

  “Well…this could be the store where it is. Do you remember seeing anything in this store that you really, really wanted?”

  Meggie thought on it for a moment, then her eyes lit up. “A baby doll! The one with red hair like yours, and the yellow ribbon in her hair! Oh, Mommy, do I really get it?”

  Kathleen smiled and playfully touched the tip of Meggie’s nose. “Yes, you do. Can you remember where it is?”

  The child recalled the exact spot in the toy department where she had seen the doll, and she hurried through the store, leading her mother by the hand.

  Five minutes later, Kathleen and Meggie left the toy department with the baby doll in Meggie’s arms. Her face beamed as she cradled the doll and said, “What’s her name, Mommy?”

  “She doesn’t have one yet, honey. It’s up to you to give her a name.”

  “Awright. Her name’s Kathleen, like yours.”

  Kathleen stopped and loo
ked down at her daughter. “Honey, are you sure you want to give her my name?”

  “Uh-huh.”

  “Why?”

  Meggie looked up into her mother’s eyes and smiled. “‘Cause you’re my favorite lady person in all the world. Daddy’s my favorite man person in all the world, an’ if my baby doll was a boy, I would call him Peter. But she’s a girl, so I want to call her Kathleen.”

  The young mother bent over, hugged Meggie, and kissed her cheek. “You’re my favorite little girl person, and that’s why I bought you Kathleen.”

  “No, Mommy, I’m not a little girl no more, remember? I’m four years old.”

  “Oh, yes, I forgot. You’re my favorite big girl person!”

  “Thank you for buying Kathleen for me, Mommy. Thank you very much.”

  “You’re very welcome, honey.”

  Suddenly a voice from behind her called out, “Kathleen!”

  She turned to see Hennie Killanin rushing toward her, carrying a baby boy about a year old in her arms, and pulling a little girl by the hand who would be about Meggie’s age.

  “Hennie! It’s so good to see you!”

  The reunion between Hennie and Kathleen was sweet, and the mothers proudly showed off their children.

  Hennie had married Seth O’Banion, whom Kathleen remembered meeting at Hennie’s church when she’d heard Dwight Moody preach. At the time, however, Hennie and Seth had not been courting.

  “And what is your married name, Kathleen?”

  Hennie was shocked to learn that Kathleen had married into the wealthy Stallworth family, especially when Kathleen told her she had been the Stallworths’ cleaning lady.

  Kathleen spared Hennie the sordid details of the Stallworths’ disapproval of her as a daughter-in-law and simply said, “Peter and I are deeply in love, Hennie, and our beautiful Meggie makes our love perfect.”

  “Well, Kathleen, I’m meeting some friends in a few minutes, so I need to go. It sure has been good to see you and know that you’re doing so well. I hated losing touch with you after the fire…”

  “I know, Hennie, but that’s all behind us now. That’s not to say that I’ve forgotten my family… Oh, how I miss them, Hennie! Sometimes I wish—”