Anchored

by Hoffmann, Tracey

  Alex looked across at Patrick and nodded. “Yes, that’s where we need to start. Are you okay to answer some questions, Mia?”

  Mia’s mind screamed no, she wasn’t okay. How could this be happening to her? The inner turmoil turned her stomach and she gripped the edge of the seat, hurting her hands. Mia blinked back the burning in her eyes. Lord, give me your peace—guard my heart, my mind—please. Mia straightened her shoulders and nodded.

  Alex took out a dictaphone and asked if they were okay with his taping the conversation. Everyone nodded and Alex switched it on.

  “Did your mother have any similar incidents occur with her car? Letters left on the windscreen or in the letterbox? Vandalism that you can remember?”

  “Someone egged mum’s car once, does that count?” Her eyes widened at the thought of the connection.

  “Yes. Can you remember when this happened?” Ian asked.

  “Not really. Not long before she died. My parents argued about it.” Mia frowned.

  “What was the argument about—do you remember what was said?” Ian scribbled in his notebook and his eyebrows ran together as he frowned.

  “I suppose it must have been about what happened. Mum wanted to call the police but Dad played it down. Then he went outside and cleaned the car.”

  Ian tapped his pencil for a moment, then looked across at Alex and indicated with his hand for him to continue.

  Alex nodded. “Have you noticed any unfamiliar cars around the area, either parked or driving by?”

  “No, I don’t think so. Have you Terri?” Mia asked her friend.

  “No.” Terri answered.

  “Gentlemen, what about you?” David shrugged his shoulders and turned to his brother. “Patrick?”

  “No, can’t say I—hang on a minute, I do remember a car. Remember the time Terri and Mia came for dinner? You guys left me to tidy up the mess and I watched you leave from outside. Just as you turned the corner a car across the road turned on its lights and followed you. I didn’t take too much notice of it at the time.” Patrick rubbed his hand over his eyes.

  “Can you remember anything about the car—model, color?” Alex asked.

  “Give me a minute. I should be able to pull it out of my memory bank.”

  David mentioned how Patrick would be sitting at a café storing details of what was around him. He’d later pull these details up for descriptive scenes in his books.

  “White Nissan Pulsar.” Opening his eyes, Patrick’s mouth lifted at the corners.

  “Are you sure?” Alex asked.

  “Yes, definitely, white Nissan Pulsar,” Patrick stated confidently.

  “Do you remember if the driver was in the car when Mia and the others left or did you see the person get into the car?” Alex’s eyes narrowed as he asked the question.

  “I would have noticed if he’d opened the car door and got in. He must have been sitting in the dark!”

  “Mia, have you noticed a white Nissan Pulsar anywhere you’ve been?”

  Shaking her head, Mia nibbled on her lower lip. “I don’t pay attention to what model car people drive.” Smiling, she titled her head. “I can tell you what color they are though.”

  Alex swiveled in his chair and smiled back. “I need you to write me a list of anyone you know with a white car.”

  “Okay.”

  Ian reached over and flicked off the Dictaphone. “Mia, is it possible for you to lay low for a few weeks? Take some time off and move in with your uncle?” he asked.

  Mia frowned, frustrated that her life was not her own. Her jaw ached and she flexed her chin. “If you think it’s necessary—yes.”

  Ian gave Mia a smile. “Two weeks would give us a small window of time to check some of the leads without having to put surveillance on you.”

  Mia’s lips tightened and her gaze swept them all. “All right. But if the person is serious about killing me—they could find me no matter where I go.”

  Chapter 33

  Jonathan placed the plate in the dishwasher. He’d been making an effort to clean up and felt better for it. Robert was coming over. Jonathan struggled to understand how Robert could forgive him, let alone care about him. He hadn’t told anyone he’d made the decision and met with Jesus. Somehow he wanted to keep it to himself for a while. It wasn’t that he didn’t want them to know, but it was all so new to him.

  Hearing the car arrive, Jonathan opened the door and for the first time noticed the trouble Robert had with his leg. He frowned as he watched him shuffle awkwardly up the path.

  “Hey, Jon.” Robert came up to him and grabbed him in a bear hug.

  Laughing to hide his embarrassment at the show of affection, Jonathan shoved Robert away.

  “Have you spoken to Mia?” Robert asked.

  “No.” Jonathan felt the old jealousy rare up. “But obviously you have,” he sneered.

  “Let’s get this out in the open. I never understood what caused the gap between you and Mia. I tried to get her to talk to you when she was younger, but you and I both know why she didn’t.”

  Jonathan’s head slumped and he gave a heavy sigh. Robert was right, Mia couldn’t trust him.

  Running a shaky hand through his hair, Jonathan met Robert’s stare and blurted out. “This isn’t easy—I find the truth attacks me, shames me—I want to crawl into a hole and hide.”

  “Hiding doesn’t work. The truth is with you wherever you go.” Robert’s eyes bore into his and Jonathan tried to hold his gaze, finally shifting in his seat and nodding.

  “You’ve been hiding your whole life, man—come clean, get free.”

  “Easier said than done. Things I did as a child to cover up how hurt I was—like being angry, have become normal for me. Its no excuse, I know, but it’s like I automatically think this way.”

  “Mmm, hiding in anger.” Robert scratched his chin. “You can change. It’s a choice you have to make.” Robert clapped his hands. “Well, the key in my opinion is to stop being so self-absorbed. It’s not all about you, mate. Time you started thinking about others, me for instance. I could use a hand on the weekend with some yard work. How about it?”

  Jonathan’s mouth fell open. Robert had never asked him for help.

  “Close that mouth before you swallow a fly. What’s it going to be—you going to give me a hand or not?”

  “Sure, I’d like to.” Jonathan’s lips curled and his eyes lightened. Robert nodded.

  “Jon, Mia had her car tires slashed and it looks like someone’s been following her around.”

  “Are you serious? Is she all right?” Jonathan felt the lightness he’d been beginning to feel disappear. His skin tightened over his forehead and he rubbed at the pulse throbbing in his temple.

  “Yeah, I think she’s okay. She seems to be taking it in her stride. She also got a threatening letter, which the police think is linked to the tires. They’ll probably come around and see you. I’m expecting a call from them too.”

  A flush covered Jonathan’s face and he swore softly. His hand messed up his hair and his eyes snapped back to Robert.

  Robert’s eyes narrowed. “Do you know something?”

  “Margaret got some stuff done to her car and was also threatened. I talked it down. Told her it was just some prankster. We had an argument about it and then neither of us brought it up again. It wasn’t long after that, that she died.”

  “We need to tell the police. It could be connected”

  “I hope not.” Standing, Jonathan began to pace.

  “Who would do such a thing? I can’t imagine Maggie having an enemy, and Mia wouldn’t hurt anyone deliberately.” A worried frown drew Robert’s eyes together.

  Jonathan stopped pacing. Why had he played it down? He’d thought it was Judy—he’d wanted to cover his tracks. She wouldn’t be capable of murder. Maybe the eggs, but this?

  He gripped his stomach as his muscles tensed. Moving back to his seat he sat down and looked across the lounge at Robert. He needed to tell him.
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br />   “Robert, there’s no easy way to say this and it may not be connected—but if it is I need to tell the police.”

  “What? Tell them what?” he asked wearily.

  “I got involved with—I had an affair.” Keeping his eyes on Robert to gauge his reaction, Jonathan waited.

  “You had an affair?” Robert hissed out a breath. “Is there no end to what you’ve done?”

  The sound of Robert slamming his hand on the table made Jonathan jump. Bile rose in his throat as he acknowledged his sin.

  “How could you!” Robert scampered out of his chair and paced around the room.

  Jonathan could hear him taking deep breaths and was stunned to see Robert’s lips moving silently. The man was praying. Jonathan’s eyes flooded and he looked away. A tight knot settled between his shoulder blades. He glanced up as he heard Robert move.

  “Can you tell me about it?” Robert asked.

  Tears escaped Jonathan’s eyes. Guilt surrounded him, spoke to him, told him he was the worst kind of man.

  “I can’t tell Maggie I’m sorry.” He gulped for air. “I can’t tell her I loved her and regret every minute. I got trapped with this other woman. She wouldn’t let me go.”

  “What do you mean, she wouldn’t let you go? If that’s the case then she’d still be around, wouldn’t she?” Robert shivered and shouted. “Are you still seeing her?”

  “No, I’m not. But it wasn’t long ago I told her it was over. Every time I tried to break up with her she would threaten to tell Margaret. I couldn’t stand the thought of losing Maggie so I played her games.”

  “How long, Jonathan?” Robert asked in a sad tone.

  “Since before Mia was born, to after Margaret died.” He did nothing to stop the flow of tears.

  Robert slumped. His hand rubbed over his chin and he gave a deep sigh. “Did Margaret ever suspect?”

  “There were times when she must have. When she stayed with your parents after Mia was born she knew I’d been seeing another woman. She made me promise it was over. I promised, but—it—got complicated.”

  “Do you think this woman could be the person who slashed Mia’s tires?” Robert said through clenched teeth.

  “I don’t know. I told her it was over and I haven’t seen her since.”

  “Has she phoned or tried to make contact with you?”

  “No.” Physical pain pulsed through Jonathan’s chest and he pushed his hand at the ache over his heart.

  “Do you think she could have killed Margaret?”

  “No, I can’t believe she’d do that. I’m going to the police to tell them everything I know about her. I have to go right now.”

  “I’ll come with you.” Standing, Robert placed his hand on Jonathan’s shoulder. “I forgive you. I can’t say I understand any of this. God loves you, man. You have to accept this.”

  Chapter 34

  Jonathan felt tension coil down his spine. The detectives had relentlessly pummeled him with question after question. His shoulders slumped and he dragged his feet heavily down the corridor towards Robert. He didn’t believe Judy was the one threatening Mia. Sure she was angry with him, but to kill Margaret? No way.

  His face scorched with shame and his head dropped further as he recalled the disgust on their faces when he’d blurted out that he’d sexually abused Mia.

  They’d acted immediately on his confession, leaving him in a secure room while they visited Mia. He’d waited four agonizing hours until they returned to release him.

  Mia hadn’t pressed charges and Robert had waited for him.

  He felt baffled by their response. A thick lump swelled in his throat as Robert walked beside him to the car. Jonathan expected a barrage of questions from Robert and turned towards him.

  “How do you feel?” Robert asked.

  Jonathan’s eyes closed briefly. “Guilty.”

  Robert nodded. “You’ll get over it. Come on, I’ll drop you home.”

  When they pulled up outside his house Jonathan turned to Robert. “You okay?”

  “No.” Robert slammed his hand on the steering wheel. “I can’t stop thinking about Maggie and how you betrayed my sister. Just get out of the car, Jonathan.”

  Opening the door Jonathan wearily pulled himself out of the car. He bent down and looked in at Robert. “I understand. I’m sorry.”

  ~~~

  Jonathan’s body felt heavy and tired as he sunk into a lounge chair and shut his eyes tight.

  “Lord, can you tell Maggie I’m sorry. I wish I could turn the clock back. How can a man like me—” He felt choked and unable to continue.

  Breathing heavily, he allowed his thoughts to move where words were too difficult.

  God, I’m so worthless, yet you love me. I know it’s true but it’s so hard to let go of what I’ve done. I deserve to be dead instead of Maggie. I deserve to be punished for what I did to Mia. How do I live with this guilt, this shame?

  Jonathan moved to the window. Who did he think he was anyway? Had he just once thought of Margaret when he was with Judy? He didn’t deserve a second chance. His hands spread out on the glass and he leaned his forehead between them. The cold seeped into his skin and he shuddered and moved to pull the curtain.

  Face the fact Jonathan—you’ve earned the right to be called a creep!

  He could see the faces of his wife and daughter beseeching him to love them. Why hadn’t he been able to accept what they offered?

  “Lord, I can’t do this.”

  Son, my blood has freed you from condemnation.

  “What do you mean? I don’t understand.”

  Jonathan waited for an answer but silence filled the room. He needed to know what this meant.

  Looking at his watch he saw it was 10:00 p.m., was it too late to phone Robert? There was no way he could sleep with this question running through his mind.

  Going into the kitchen he picked up the portable phone and went back into the lounge and sat down.

  ~~~

  Robert absently rubbed his leg and rested his head on the back of the chair. He was acutely aware of his anger as he tensed and released his fists.

  How could Maggie have loved Jonathan? She deserved better. His fingers drummed the top of his unopened Bible. He didn’t want to open it. How could he look past everything Jonathan had done, and love him? This question pounded his head and heart.

  Robert jumped when his mobile phone vibrated on the table beside him. He picked it up and saw Jonathan’s number. His thumb quivered over the stop button and he frowned.

  Shaking his head, he answered. “Jonathan.”

  “Sorry to call so late. Can I ask you something?”

  “Yes.” Robert knew his voice sounded abrupt, but he was listening, wasn’t he?

  “I know Jesus has forgiven me and I accept this. I was talking to Jesus and he said, ‘Son, my blood has freed you from condemnation.’ What does this mean?”

  “You’ve been talking to Jesus?” Robert hunched forward and flexed his jaw.

  “Arr—sorry. I was going to tell you, but thought I’d wait until things settled down a bit.”

  Robert’s eyes well up and his head lowered in shame. Jonathan had received salvation and he felt nothing. Had he even prayed for him?

  “Have you told Mia?”

  “No. I will. I want to come to grips with it somehow. I don’t feel I deserve to be forgiven. It’s like Jesus says I’m forgiven, yet I feel so ashamed.”

  “And you say God said His blood has freed you from condemnation?”

  “Yeah. What does that mean?”

  “Hang on while I look something up.” Robert thumbed through the pages of his Bible until he found what he was looking for. He started to read the words, then stopped. “Go get your Bible so we can read it together.”

  “Right.” Robert heard the phone clank and waited.

  “I have it.”

  “Open it to the book of Romans.”

  “Where’s that?”

  “It’s afte
r Acts. Go to the index and look up the page number, that’ll be easier.”

  The sound of ruffling pages brought the beginning of a smile to Robert’s face.

  “Romans, now where?” Jonathan asked urgently.

  “Turn until you get to Romans 8. There will be an eight on the page.”

  “Yes, got that.”

  “Can you read me what it says, Jon?” Robert heard Jonathan clear his throat and felt his shoulders relax.

  “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death.”

  “Do you understand what that means?”

  “Just tell me, will you? I can see what it says—no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus and I know that means me. But I can say it, read it. But I don’t feel it.”

  “Brother it’s like this; Jesus died for you, his blood was shed for the forgiveness of your sins. This verse tells us that his blood also offers us protection from any form of condemnation!”

  “Protection?” Jonathan marveled at the words.

  “Yeah. As I see it, you have been forgiven and that’s it! You are forgiven. Who tells you you’re not good enough?”

  With a sob in his voice Jonathan answered. “Me. I’m so ashamed of what I’ve done.”

  “It’s not only you, mate, it’s the accuser. Satan will want to destroy you. You need to understand that all your sins are forgiven. Jesus has restored you to himself. You can confidently go into the throne room of God because you have been made righteous through the blood of Jesus. Do you get it?”

  Jonathan sniffed. “Jesus’ blood has removed my sin! Completely!”

  “Yes.” Robert spoke quietly.

  “Wow. When Jesus died he carried the shame of what I did? That’s not fair, it should have been me.”

  “And me.” Robert said softly.

  “Even though I’m forgiven it doesn’t change what I did.” Robert heard a catch in Jonathan’s voice.

  “God forgives you, man, but you stuffed up big time with your family. We still have to pay the consequence of sin here. If Mia charged you for assaulting her—you’d go to prison.”