Raunchy 3

by T. Styles

  She looks like she wants to dispute but I beg her with my eyes. She nods and I say, “Thank you.” I really mean it.

  I run my hand softly over his hair and kiss him gently on the forehead. When I remove my lips, you would’ve thought I was about to eat his face off, the way she snatches the baby out of my arm. I’m quiet. I’m broken. I’m hurt.

  After he’s taken from me and placed into a glass box, I roll over and cry. “Do you have anyone to care for the child? Any next of kin?” The doctor asks. Fuck you. “Mam, I know this hurts but with you being incarcerated, if your baby makes it, we need to know what you want done with him.”

  I think of Jayden and the whorehouse she’s running out of Concord Manor. I think about my sisters and how they’d probably fry him before giving him any love. I think about how I don’t even know who the father is. “No. I don’t have any family. If he makes it, I’ll put him up for adoption.”

  She gasps. “Miss, are you sure? As sickly as he is, even if he survives, he’ll need the love of his family to pull through.”

  I can’t hear her anymore. There’s one question I must know. “Is he HIV positive?”

  “Yes.” She says softly. I weep. “Mam, are you sure about adoption?”

  I fucked up his world before it even has a chance to begin. I won’t hurt him further by being his mother. “Yes, I am.”

  She shakes her head and says, “If you say so. I’ll bring in the paperwork later.”

  I plummet deeper into depression with the birth of my son. So deep that I can see hell. I can touch it if I try hard enough. Life for me is over and I welcome the day when I don’t have to breathe anymore. I hope it comes sooner than later.

  MADJESTY

  THE HOLE

  This place is dark and cool. Not much light is here with the exception of the candles on the opposite wall from us. I’m sitting on the floor, leaning up against the wall with a box of shrimp fried rice in my hand. Spirit is to my left and Gage is to my right and they’re tearing into the chicken wings.

  Since I got up with them we spent a lot of time in this abandoned building in D.C. that they called The Hole. We stayed here even though after we left Mr. Mercedes house, we were up about two thousand dollars apiece. But I didn’t want to give anybody my money for a hotel room because right now all I wanted to do was drink and stack my paper. In case I found my baby and had to take care of him.

  It’s fucked up how we came up on the money, by being in the presence of a murder-suicide but it wasn’t like we pulled the trigger. We just made the best of a tragic situation. After his girlfriend killed Mr. Mercedes, right before she killed herself, we wiped the house and the car down of our fingerprints and decided to get away together. We’d been together ever since.

  Spirit and Gage were the ones who told me about The Hole and tonight I would be meeting the rest of their friends. They’re real hush-hush about their circle and I think most of them are on the run from something or somebody. For instance I found out that Gage hitchhiked from New York to be with her boyfriend Wicked. Although Gage’s face lights up whenever she talks about him, it’s obvious that Spirit doesn’t fuck with the relationship. After we shared a bottle of henny, I found out why one night.

  We were sitting in a diner, busted when Spirit said, “Gage, Wicked is my boy, but you know he never gonna do you right. He treats you like shit and I know he hit you before.”

  “That’s a lie.”

  “You know it’s not. Plus he fucked with everybody in the family and he does it in your face at that.” Spirit continued. I wasn’t sure if he liked her for himself, or if he just wanted her away from Wicked. “Stop taking up for him. It’s not necessary when you’re with me.”

  “You always saying stuff like that but you not the one who’s with him. I love him, Spirit, and if you’re my friend you’re going to have to respect that. He makes me happy and I’m in D.C., because he brought me here. Had it not been for him, I would’ve never met you.” She paused, drinking her Coke. “Don’t make me choose between you and him because it won’t be you.”

  Spirit seemed sad. “I would never do that to you. You’re the closest person to me in the family and I don’t want to see you hurt. And the nigga Wicked will hurt you.”

  I found out that day that family to them was the same thing as a gang to me. Except they had a father, a mother and kids, which I think is way too weird. But since I didn’t have a life anymore, I had time on my hands to humor them. To see what they were about.

  That day at the diner didn’t change how Gage felt about Wicked, but it did give me an idea of what I was in store for. It’s also the reason I’m nervous about meeting the rest of the crew tonight.

  After Spirit and Gage came back with the money we’d stolen from Mr. Mercedes, they were able to buy antibiotics from a place in Virginia for Fierce, one of their members who was sickly. The rest of the family made the trip to Virginia to get the stuff and Spirit and Gage hung back with me. Their crew had been gone for four days and I wasn’t sure how I felt about them coming back and seeing me in their spot.

  “I see you look nervous,” Spirit says, slapping his hand on my shoulder. “You gonna love the family though. We wouldn’t have you here if we thought otherwise.”

  “He’s right, just remember to never, ever, ask people about their past unless they’re ready to tell you on their own. We’re here because we have a life we want to run away from. Things that haunt us in our sleep.” She cries again. Why is she always crying? “That’s why we adopted new names and abandoned our old ones.” She wipes her tears away and grabs a chicken wing.

  “How do you want us to refer to you?” Spirit asks. “A bitch or nigga?”

  “I’m a nigga, so I’d prefer to keep it like that.”

  “You got it.” He laughs.

  “Ok, so what name you gonna go by?” Gage says.

  I think about it for a few seconds. There’s something fly about leaving the past in the past and starting all over. But I think my real name reflects how I feel and where I am in my life. I haven’t slept in a bed in weeks; I don’t have a home and the only thing that stays fresh on me are my sneaks and my underwear. I’m angry all the time. “Mad.” I nod. “I think I’m keeping Mad.”

  “If you like it I love it.” Spirit says.

  ****

  We just cracked opened another bottle of Hennessy when Wicked, White Boy, Fierce, Daze and Killer walk in with a white girl who seems out of place. She has red hair and she’s wearing a white dress that looks like she just left the prom. A little dizzy, I use the wall to stand up, brush off the back of my pants and ready myself to greet the squad. They embrace Gage and Spirit without acknowledging me. It’s cool though.

  When they’re done Spirit says, “Wicked, I want you to meet one of the realest niggas I know.” He walks him over to me and I reach out to shake his hand. He doesn’t accept.

  Wicked is a white boy with a baldhead and dark gray eyes. “Cool tat.” He says pointing to my right hand. “Who’s Cassius?”

  “My son.” I look down at the tattoo which reads, ‘Cassius Phillips Lost But Soon Found’.

  “That’s hot.” He doesn’t ask more questions about him. “I heard it’s because of you, we had money to help our friend.” He pulls over another kid who’s very scrawny. “This man right here.” He taps him on the back. “Fierce, say hi to the person responsible for saving your life.”

  Fierce seems shy but he manages a, “Hi,” along with a weak wave. He’s a black kid who looks timid.

  “What it is,” I say waiting for the rest of the introductions. I pull my cap over my eyes.

  Spirit continues, “This is White Boy,” when a black kid as dark as an Opal Stone steps up I’m thrown off. “But we call him WB.”

  “Don’t worry about it, buddy.” He laughs I guess picking up on my facial expression. “I get that most times when people meet me. Since I’m extra dark and I tell people my name is White Boy, I always throw them off.” His energy is infect
ious and I like him immediately.

  “Now this is our father, Daze.” Spirit continues. A black teenager steps up and he looks a little older than everybody else.

  “Welcome.” He says to me, although I don’t believe he means it. “This is the mother of our family, her name is Killer.” Killer is a beautiful light skin girl with heroin tracks up and down her body…not just her arms. “She’s the love of my life,” and he points a finger into my chest, “and she’s off limits.”

  I step back and all of them hang against the walls looking at me. I’m sipping some Hennessey until I see Gage’s face. She’s focused on her boyfriend Wicked who is in another world with his new friend. “Who’s the white girl?” Spirit asks. “She hasn’t been introduced yet.” Wicked’s arm hangs over her neck and he’s whispering in her ear.

  “My bad,” he says with a smile, “we found this beauty at the train station on the way back. She was alone and crying after her fiance’ stood her up at the alter. We took a vote and everybody agrees. We like her so we’ll keep her.” Gage is standing behind me and I hear her crying softly. Not caring about his girlfriend’s feelings, he claps his hands together. “Since we got the formalities out the way, let’s party.”

  An hour later there was weed, liquor and other drugs I stayed away from circling around The Hole. Everybody seems lighter and I feel like I’m in a different world. They told me that they only use the building on certain days, because the police usually run them out every chance they get. When I asked where they go during the times they can’t stay there, Spirit’s response throws me off.

  “Underground. We call it the Catacombs.”

  ****

  When I wake up my head is banging. I feel like its about to explode and I think once again, I’d overdone it. When I look around I see everybody is still asleep. Since I don’t know where the bathroom is, I grab my Jordans and put them on. I don’t care how long I’ve gone without taking a shower, when it comes to keeping my tennis shoes and my underwear fresh, I don’t fuck around. When I’m done, I stand up to try and find a bathroom. Once on my feet, I see the white girl with the red hair laying on the floor, with blood all over her dress and face. Her legs are wide open along with her eyes. She’s as dead as MC Hammer pants.

  “Spirit.” I say in a low voice. He doesn’t move. “Yo, Spirit, get the fuck up.”

  He finally shifts and when he does, I point in the direction of the girl. “What the fuck!” he says scrambling to get off the floor.

  His response wakes up everyone else and they all scream after seeing her body. Daze walks up to her, places his hand on her neck and says what we already know. “She’s not breathing.” He looks at all of us and shakes his head but then his eyes rests back on me.

  He walks to my direction and says, “What’s that on your shirt?”

  “What?” I look down and I see blood all over my hands and clothes. “Wait a minute…”

  “What you do to her, man?” he looks like he wants to hit me.

  “I…I don’t know.” I wasn’t even interested in her.

  “What do you mean you don’t know?” He persists. “She’s dead and you have blood all over your clothes.” This has happened to me before. All I can think is damn; I picked a hell of a time to go into the Drunk Zone.

  GUCCI

  CAUGHT UP

  Gucci gropes her boyfriend’s dick when he pulls up on the side of Concord Manor. She just finished tonguing his asshole, while he jerked off in the back of his car after a movie. He parks. “You are so fucking sexy. You know that’s how you got me, with that pretty ass face of yours,” Tito says to her. “Your pussy is good but when I look into them eyes, my dick gets hard every time.”

  She blushes. “Thank you, baby, whatever I can do to keep you I’m on it.”

  “I don’t think you can take all the credit for that, your mother had something to do with it too.” He pauses and rubs her hair. “So when we gonna get that place we talked about, Gucci?” He strokes the side of her face. “I’m tired of having to share you with this bitch.” He nods at the house. Although Tito wants to live with Gucci, it’s not because he loves her. She’s been tricking out on him since they first got together.

  “I’m working on it right now, trust me. The moment I get a few more of her clients, we’re out of here.” She kisses him on the lips and suckles his tongue like a lollipop. “And then we’ll get to have the life we always wanted. And maybe even a baby.” Yeah right, bitch. He thinks.

  While she talks to her boyfriend in the car, Sugar passes to approach Concord Manor. She goes to the door, takes a deep breath and knocks twice. She’s been worried sick since no one has been able to get a hold of Madjesty. It doesn’t take long for a girl to open the door that she recognizes from school. “Ain’t your name Passion?” She points. “I think we go to high school together.”

  Passion rubs her arms rapidly like its freezing. “So…who’s asking?”

  Sugar senses her attitude and backs down on the pleasantries. “I’m sorry, my name is Sugar. And I’m looking for Madjesty, is she here? Or has anyone inside heard from her?”

  Passion grows angry. Madjesty was the love of her life and since she’d been rejected recently, she plummeted into drugs. So a bitch coming to the house asking where she was did nothing but worsen her mood. “What do you want with Madjesty?” She looks the pretty girl with the red glasses over. Madjesty would fuck her for sure. She thought.

  “I’m one of her best friends and the last time I saw her, some guy name Shaggy was trying to kill her. And I really want to make sure she’s okay.” Passion shivers upon hearing the news, she has no idea the Jayden used a calculator for the situation. In other words, the problem was already solved. “Don’t worry,” Sugar responds, seeing her body language change, “we were able to hold him off but he got away before the cops came. He could be anywhere which is why we’re scared for Madjesty.”

  Her body relaxes. “I see,” she sighs, “I don’t know where Madjesty is.” Her voice lowers. “I wish I did though.” She looks behind her, steps out and closes the door. She doesn’t see Gucci approaching before she makes her next statement. “If you find Madjesty tell her that her sister has her son. And she says as long as she has him, she’ll never see him again.”

  Sugar’s mouth drops. “Are you serious? Can I see him?”

  Gucci hides in the bushes to ear hustle some more.

  “I’m very serious and you can’t see the kid. I would tell her myself but Mad hasn’t come back here since I last saw her a while ago. But please get the message to her. And if you find her, tell her I still love her too.” Sugar didn’t know about all of that, but if she found Madjesty, some of her message would get to her. She had what folks called, selective memory.

  When Sugar moves to her car, she sees Gucci in the bushes and smiles. Although Gucci gives her a grin, she can’t wait to let Jayden know that her precious little two-faced friend Passion has finally stabbed her in the back.

  ****

  Gucci marches into the house eager to tell everything she’s discovered about disloyal ass Passion. But when she gets inside, Jayden is sitting at the table with a no nonsense look on her face. A small burgundy cloth napkin is covering a pile of something she can’t see on the table, and a mallet used for crabs is on the side. Standing against the walls are all of Thirteen Flavors along with her crew, Queen, Na-Na and Foxie whose nose is red due to crying. The Young Guns are in the background, waiting for their queue from Jayden.

  “Hello, Gucci. I’ve been wondering when you were going to come into the house. Jayden crosses her legs and whips her hair over her shoulder. “Come over here. We’ve been waiting for you.”

  She walks closer to the table almost swallowing her throat in the process. “What’s up, Jayden?” She looks at her friends, trying to read their expressions. “Is everything good?”

  “I don’t know, you tell me.” Jayden stands up and smooth’s the sides of her red shirt with her hands, “are you not happy w
ith our arrangement here? Haven’t I treated you with respect despite not liking your sneaky ass? Didn’t I allow you to stay in my home, eat my food and use my water? I treated you better than that bitch you have for a mother and yet you continue to bite my hand. Even tried to set me up when Mrs. Sheers came over, by telling her Madjesty wasn’t upstairs, when you knew what it meant to me.”

  Suddenly Gucci knows what’s going on and she grows uneasy. Some kind of way she was ousted and it hurts thinking that it was a member of her crew. “Jayden, you know I love it here. Girl, I was just telling my mother how happy I am now that I live with you. I’m thinking about going back to school with you and Passion and everything.” Beads of sweat dance across her forehead. “If anything you been an inspiration in my life and I thank God every morning for you.” She’s laying it on thick and some people can’t bare to listen.

  Jayden giggles. “Is that why you steal from me? Because you’re so happy here? Because I inspire you?” She snaps her thumb and Queen and Foxie grab their friend forcefully. The way they grip her forearms hurt more than anything. She feels like they are being unfaithful which is what Jayden wanted.

  On Jayden’s command they pull her to the table and when she’s there, Jayden lifts the cloth napkin revealing a pile of broken glass. While Gucci was licking ass and nuts outside the movie theater, she was inside smashing a glass bottle into tiny fragments. Just…for…her.

  “I will give you credit, the client you stole from me says although your price was cheap and your services okay, you do have a pretty face.” Jayden runs her finger alongside her jaw before stuffing her finger in her jaws, opening her mouth wider. “Let me see if I can change your looks a little.”