Still Wifey Material

by Kiki Swinson

  This is a work of fiction. All of the characters, organizations, and events portrayed in this novel are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.

  Still Wifey Material. Copyright © 2008 by Kiki Swinson. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews. For information, address Melodrama Publishing, P.O. Box 522, Bellport, NY 11713.

  www.melodramapublishing.com

  Library of Congress Control Number: 2007943731

  ISBN-13: 978-1934157107

  ISBN-10: 1934157104

  First Edition: November 2008

  10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

  A Novel by Kiki Swinson

  Starting Over

  (Kira Speaks)

  After two long weeks of unnecessary drama, and of mourning the deaths of Quincy, Rhonda, and my grandmother, Nikki and I made up. She took the death of my grandmother pretty badly, though. I was broken up about it myself, but Nikki and my grandmother grew very close after my supposed death. Having to go on in life without my grandmother was going to be a very difficult journey for her, which was why I suggested that she and I move to Houston, Texas. She was kind of hesitant at first, but after I told her how cheap the real estate was there and that we could open up a brand new hair salon and make plenty of money, she jumped at the opportunity.

  While I got on the phone with a real estate agent, Nikki put in for a transfer with her probation officer, Maxine Shaw. Maxine gave her some static in the beginning, but ended up approving it. I tied up the loose ends with the salon and sold everything. I hit Rhonda’s mother off with a little cushion for the kids, since they were my godchildren, and packed my bags. After saying our goodbyes to Nikki’s parents, we were out of there.

  Life in Houston was a bit different. There were a lot of people with dough living out there, and if they didn’t have any money, they looked like they did, so I had to step up my game. I purchased a beautiful twenty-five-hundred-square-foot brick home in the gated community of Sonoma Ranch Estates with three bedrooms and a huge backyard for less than one hundred seventy-five thousand dollars. I went to the nearest Lexus dealership and traded in my old Lexus for a 2008 Matador Red Mica LS 460 with tan leather interior. The shit was so hot, and not only that, but I looked good in it. Nikki must have had the same thoughts as me, because she pulled out her checkbook and stroked a seventy-five-thousand-dollar check to the same salesman I used, so she could buy the exact same car I bought. Hers was black with gray interior. They even threw in a set of custom rims. You should have seen her face after she handed the check to the man. It was like she was trying to prove something to me.

  After the salesman took her money and left to speak with his sales manager to process her deal, I pulled her aside and asked her where she was going to get the money to cover the check.

  “Why are you worried about it? I got this,” she replied, and then she smiled and started to walk away.

  I grabbed her arm. “Why you got to walk off? This is serious. These salesmen ain’t got time for games. They are expecting every number you wrote on that check to be in that account,” I warned.

  “And it is,” she said, getting frustrated. “I took two-hundred-thousand from Syncere’s stash while he was locked up. That’s why the nigga tried to kill me.”

  “Oh really?”

  “Yep, I sure did,” she said with a smirk. “All the shit I took from him, I deserved every penny.” And with that said, she scooted toward the accounting office.

  I stood there in disbelief because in all honesty, I didn’t buy one word she had said. She was one timid-ass bitch, and I knew how afraid she was of Syncere, so she would not have taken anything from his crazy ass. Besides, right before we left Virginia, there was some talk on the streets that Quincy had been hit up for a large sum of cash either before he got killed or right after. Since Nikki told the police that she was the one who found his body tortured to death, I figured she had to be the one who clipped him. When I asked her about it a while back, she denied it, so I left it alone and didn’t bother to mention it to her again.

  If you wanted my opinion, I could have cared less if she took his money, because I had my own. As a matter-of-fact, between the five-hundred-thousand-dollar insurance check I got from Ricky’s death, the one-hundred-fifty-thousand-dollar insurance check I got from a policy I took out on my grandmother years ago, and the little bit of money I got from selling my business, I was going to be set for a while.

  As far as Nikki was concerned, she had a few plans of her own. None of them had been brought into manifestation, but she kept reminding me constantly of how she wanted to open up a salon of her own, so it wouldn’t be long before she decided to branch off and do her own thing. Speaking of which, a few days after Nikki and I rode away from the dealership with our new whips, I stumbled across the perfect location for my salon while I was cruising around the uptown district of Houston. Since it came at a really good price, I snatched it up the very next day. It only took us about a month to open the shop, which I named Creative Images, and we rented out two of the other four booths we had to some well-established hair stylists from the area.

  That was the easy part. The hard part came after we finally opened the salon’s doors. Stylists from other salons in the area started hating on us because we took their clients. When I tell you that the chicks out there were vicious, believe me! A lot of those hoes had a lot of mouth. In fact, there were three loudmouthed Nigerian chicks who braided hair in a shop right next door to us. They were always getting into it with Nikki about the parking spaces outside, since we only had eight parking spaces in the side lot that we all had to share. It seemed like every time Nikki and I turned around, their customers were taking up all the damn spaces.

  One day I made a trip over there and had a few words with the owner, Sophie. Sophie was one ugly bitch, but you wouldn’t be able to tell her that. She wore traditional African clothing and wrapped her hair like she was a goddess or something, but she was ghetto as hell.

  When I walked into her shop, everybody, including all five of her clients, turned to face me. It was no secret why I was there, so I walked over to Sophie, threw my hands in the air, and said, “I know you know why I’m here.”

  Sophie’s big, Amazon-looking ass just stood there with a handful of synthetic braiding hair in her hand and gave me the stupidest expression she could muster. She tried to act like she had no idea why I was there, so I played along because if she wanted to act stupid, then I was more than willing to treat her that way.

  “Who in here drives a white Ford Explorer and a blue Toyota Camry?” I asked.

  “I drive the Camry,” one client yelled out.

  “I’m driving the Explorer,” one of the Nigerian hair braiders said.

  “Well, y’all are going to have to move them because I have a couple of customers at my shop that don’t have anywhere to park.”

  Both women sighed heavily as if I had just interrupted them, but they got up and grabbed their car keys from their handbags. I smiled at them both and said, “Thank you.”

  On my way out I heard Sophie mumble something under her breath and then everybody laughed. Her English was really off, but I still understood some of the shit she said. As much as I wanted to turn around and ask them what was so damn funny, I told myself that it would be a waste of time. I held my head high and kept it moving. In this day and age, you couldn’t always feed into drama, especially with the hoes over there, because Nikki and I were from out of town and we could not get caught up in their bullshit. Moreover, we had more business than they did, so the tension be
tween my front door and theirs was thick enough to cut with a knife.

  About two weeks ago, Alana, one of Sophie’s stylists, arrived one morning and saw Sophie’s husband trying to holler at Nikki. When Sophie got wind of it, she walked into our shop and immediately wanted Nikki to tell her what her and her husband’s conversation was about. Nikki stood her ground and told Sophie that she was the wrong person to be talking to.

  “What do you mean, you are the wrong person? Weren’t you the one smiling in my husband’s face?” Sophie asked, irritation stamped across her broad face.

  “Sweetie, I smile in a lot of cats’ faces, so you’re gonna need to step to him about this one,” Nikki retorted. She turned her back and walked to our back office.

  Sophie said a few things in her native language and stormed out of our shop, which was fine with me because she got the hell out of my face. After she left, I walked back to our office and screamed at Nikki about fucking with that bitch’s husband, because I didn’t travel all the way out there to create a whole new set of problems. And I let her know this shit too.

  “What the fuck is up with you and that bitch’s husband?” I yelled. “You know I’m not trying to get into unnecessary drama! So, you need to correct that bullshit and do it like yesterday!” I warned.

  “He came on to me first!” Nikki protested.

  “So what!” I sighed heavily. “You see how stupid she’ll act behind him, so back the fuck up and get your own man!”

  “Come on now, I don’t even like that ugly-ass nigga!”

  “Well, tell him that the next time he approaches you, because we don’t need that bitch running over here every time she finds out he was in your face. We are running a business here, so we do not need the drama.”

  “Yeah, a’ight,” Nikki said and went on about her business.

  That day was pretty upsetting for me, so upsetting that I had to take a time-out to pop two Tylenols because I had gotten one bad migraine. God knew that when I got a migraine, it damn near killed me, so I made it my business to keep the tension down between Nikki and those Nigerian chicks.

  On another note, I still had to get my doctor to diagnose the real reason why my migraines started. I kept telling the son of a bitch that I got shot a while back and that might be the cause, but he kept telling me some other bullshit. At that point it really didn’t matter, just as long as he found me the right medication to contain that shit before I went off the deep end.

  ***

  Later that night, Nikki and I decided to eat at the Applebee’s restaurant on Loop 610 West, which was only ten minutes away from our house. While we were being escorted to our table, we passed three cats at the bar. All three of them were handsome in their own little way. You could tell by their mannerisms and loud, boisterous chit-chat that they were average dudes. The one at the end of the bar tried to get us to chill with them, but we declined. After we were seated, the guy from the bar who invited us to sit with him walked over and paid us a visit.

  Nikki saw him coming. “Oh, Lord, here comes your boyfriend,” she mumbled.

  I looked up, and there he was, approaching our table. To prevent the guy from feeling awkward, I smiled and greeted him after he said hello.

  “Why y’all eating alone?” he asked.

  I took a look at him from head to toe and when I tell you that homeboy looked good enough to eat, believe me, he did. He had to be every bit of 215 pounds and about six feet three. He was stacked up in all the right places, and was kind of handsome. He reminded me of the NBA basketball player Carmelo Anthony with his long cornrows. The guy wore a dark blue, button-down shirt with a small RocaWear logo stitched over his heart and a dark blue pair of RocaWear jeans. The crisp white Air Forces he had on his feet made him look like a young boy with new money.

  “Eating alone gives us time to catch up on some girl talk,” I finally answered.

  He smiled. “Well, that’s all good, and I’m gon’ give you your space so you can do that. But, can y’all beautiful ladies please tell me your names?”

  I smiled back and then Nikki and I both introduced ourselves. He told us his name was Jamal and that he and his other friends lived in the area, so they decided to come out and get a few drinks.

  “What are y’all drinking?” Nikki interjected.

  “Well, I was drinking on a couple of beers. But my homeboys are sipping on some harder shit.”

  While Nikki and Jamal carried on their conversation, our waitress came over and took our order. As soon as she left, another one of Jamal’s friends came to our table. I was really not in the mood to entertain anyone at that point. All I wanted to do was sit down and eat in peace, especially after the day I had. It didn’t matter how I felt, though, because Jamal’s friend was coming over, and from the look on his face, he was confident that no one was going to stop him. I took a deep breath and exhaled. Be nice, I told myself.

  “How y’all ladies doing?” Jamal’s friend asked as he extended his hand first to me, then to Nikki.

  “We’re doing fine,” Nikki and I said in unison.

  “Is Jamal over here bothering y’all?”

  “No, he’s fine,” I said. Jamal was talking to Nikki, not me, so I was fine with it.

  “What’s your name?”

  “Kira,” I replied with disinterest, but he didn’t get the hint because he took a seat in the booth next to me. I immediately buried my head in my hands.

  “Hi, Kira, I’m Dexter. Are you all right?” He looked concerned.

  I lifted my head. “No, I think I’m coming down with a headache,” I lied.

  “Oh, I’m sorry! Would you like for me to massage your temples?” He reached for my head.

  I was utterly appalled, and my expression showed it. “No, I’ll be fine. Thank you.” I looked over at Nikki, who looked like she was about to burst into laughter.

  Dexter gazed back and forth between me and Nikki. “Did I miss something?”

  I tried to keep a straight face as I replied, “Sweetie, please don’t get offended, but I am not in the mood for a lot of chit-chat tonight. I am tired, and all I want to do is relax and eat my food in peace, if you don’t mind.”

  Dexter slid out of the booth and stood. “Damn, it’s like that?” he snapped.

  I shook my head in disbelief and turned my attention to Nikki and Jamal.

  “Fuck you, bitch! You ain’t all that, anyway,” Dexter said and stormed off.

  Shocked by his outburst, I turned back around and watched him as he headed back over to the bar. Nikki looked at me and said, “Did that whack-ass nigga just call you a bitch?”

  I chuckled a bit, just to keep from going off. “Yes, he did.” I was still looking in his direction.

  “Don’t pay him no mind,” Jamal interjected. “He’s drunk.”

  “He just disrespected my cousin, so do you think we care about that nigga being drunk?” Nikki snapped.

  “It’s OK, Nikki. Don’t get all worked up behind that loser! I mean, look at him, and look at how he’s dressed. Who wears tight-ass Levi jeans with a pair of Timbs and a white T?”

  Nikki burst into laughter, but Jamal didn’t think it was funny.

  “Come on, now, don’t diss my homeboy like that,” he begged.

  “Fuck your homeboy!” Nikki told him.

  Taken aback, Jamal got up from the booth and said, “Let me get away from over here before I curse your stupid ass out.”

  “Yeah, please carry your dumb ass away because if you think you gon’ curse me out, and I’m just gonna sit here and take it, you got another thing coming!” Nikki roared at him, rolling her eyes and giving him much attitude.

  “Yeah, whatever!” Jamal replied and walked off.

  “Whatever, my ass! Got the nerve to be walking around here, wearing a knock-off Movado watch like you paid a lot of money for it.”

  I grabbed Nikki by her arm. “Girl, don’t stoop to his level.”

  “I’m not, but can you believe those fools? Coming over here, invadin
g our space like they got it like that. What’s wrong with those idiots?”

  “Nikki, let’s just drop it. They’re back at the bar now, so let’s just enjoy our meal so we can get out of here.”

  “I don’t even want to eat here anymore.” She looked around for the waitress.

  “Whatcha trying to do, get our food to go?”

  “Yep. I am not trying to be in this place any longer than I have to.”

  I totally agreed with her. We finally got our waitress’s attention and told her we wanted our meals to go. She had our food packaged up and our check on the table in less than five minutes flat. Nikki and I were very pleased, pleased to the point that we tipped her ten dollars each before we left the restaurant. On our way out, Jamal gritted on us like a little bitch, but we ignored his silly ass and kept it moving. Niggas like him and that other clown Dexter were the type of cats that couldn’t take it when a chick dissed them and told them to beat it. They ran up on the right two chicks tonight, though. Fuck ’em both.

  On our way home, I stopped by the Texaco service station so I could pick up a couple packs of Tylenol to stop this headache I had coming on. Nikki stayed in the car while I went into the little convenience store. It only took me about three minutes flat to get in the store and out, so I was happy about that. Time was of the essence, and I was ready to go home and relax.

  When I walked back to my car, I noticed Nikki leaning out of the passenger window, grinning all up in this guy’s face. He was pumping gas only two feet away from her. He was tall and dark-skinned with high cheekbones. His features were very distinguished, and his accent immediately led me to believe that he couldn’t be from any other continent but Africa. Where in Africa, I couldn’t tell you, but I was sure Nikki knew.

  I settled into the driver’s seat. Nikki looked back at me and smiled, and then she took the liberty to introduce me to Bintu, her new foreign friend. I politely smiled at him and said hello. Bintu returned the greeting and stepped aside so that he could introduce me to his brother Fatu, who was in the passenger seat of Bintu’s car. Even though I couldn’t quite make out how he looked, I did notice that Fatu was extremely dark-skinned, even darker than Bintu with a set of white teeth, so I smiled at him too and said hi. Then I turned back around in my seat so that Nikki could continue her conversation with Bintu.