Finding Your Heart (A Town Lost in Time Book 1)

by Bess McBride

  “What?” Leigh exclaimed. “What do you mean?”

  “I have no guarantee that Harry’s pneumonia is not infectious. I do not think it is, but I cannot guarantee it. Rosanna is a new mother with an infant. Both should not be exposed to the disease. Will not.”

  “Oh!” Leigh said. “Of course. That makes sense.”

  “But what if I were to see him?” Nancy asked. “Wouldn’t I bring something back to the baby?”

  “No,” Jeremiah responded. “If Harry were infectious, it would not be transmitted so indirectly, but only through him. It is likely that we would have succumbed by now, but we have not. Still, we cannot take chances with an infant or the infant’s mother.”

  Jefferson looked as if he felt a bit out of place, and Leigh wondered if he wished he hadn’t joined them. She hoped not.

  “I’ll have to think about it,” Nancy finally said, rising. She looked down at Leigh. “Let me go get Rosanna, Will and the baby so you can meet them.”

  “Thank you!” Leigh said.

  Nancy nodded and went into the house. Leigh followed her progress, then turned back to see both Jeremiah and Jefferson watching her, as if trying to gauge her reactions.

  “Well?” she asked.

  “Well, what do you think?” Jefferson asked in a hushed voice. He leaned forward in his chair. “Was meeting her as satisfying as you hoped?”

  Leigh smiled so widely that her cheeks hurt.

  “Oh yes! Oh yes! She looks just like my mother!”

  “Excellent!” Jefferson said, his own smile mirroring hers. “I am so pleased for you.”

  “I am sorry that we cannot coax her daughter to come down to Kaskade, but perhaps if Harry recovers, that might be possible.”

  Jeremiah’s intent study of her face unnerved Leigh. It was as if he was trying to read her mind, as if her feelings mattered a great deal to him.

  “I understand completely, Jeremiah. Besides, Nancy hasn’t agreed to come down to see her father.”

  “I thought I detected some wiggle room there,” Jefferson said.

  Leigh nodded. “I did too. Isn’t she just beautiful?” She let out a long sigh.

  “Yes, she is,” Jeremiah said. “You are the spitting image of her.”

  Leigh heard the compliment, and she caught her breath. She put a hand to her warm cheeks and looked toward the door.

  Nancy pushed open the screen door. Two people followed her out. Well, three if one counted the sleeping baby in Rosanna’s arms. Leigh jumped up. Rosanna looked just like her mother and just like Leigh. In a world where Leigh felt she had lost everything—her parents, her husband, her home in 2018, even her sanity—she had found her family, people who looked like her, people who had given her life.

  “Oh, mother! She is one of us, isn’t she?” Rosanna said in a lovely warm voice. Reddish-brown curls framed her face, and she looked at Leigh with blue-and-white speckled eyes. Her pink gingham dress was reflected in the baby’s quilt. Leigh stared at her great-grandmother Jane, a baby wrapped in her mother’s arms.

  Rosanna moved forward to hug Leigh with one arm.

  “Hello, cousin Leigh,” she cooed.

  She appeared to have none of her mother’s brusqueness, but Leigh loved them both already.

  “It’s so lovely to meet you. This is my daughter, Jane, and this is Will, my husband.”

  Leigh had focused on the women so much, she had almost forgotten that Will Ferguson was her second great-grandfather. Tall, slender and tanned, he towered over everyone. His thick handlebar mustache didn’t cover his grin. He seemed pleased that Rosanna and Nancy had met a cousin. Leigh knew he was quite unaware that he was meeting his own great-great-granddaughter.

  “Hello, Will,” Leigh said, sticking out her hand for a shake. She wanted to hug him, but dared not.

  “Any cousin of Rosy’s is a cousin of mine,” he said. He surprised Leigh by wrapping an arm around her shoulders and giving her a quick squeeze.

  Out of the corner of her eye, she caught Jeremiah’s expression. He smiled widely, seemingly pleased at the outcome of their visit.

  Jefferson smiled as well, but he probably didn’t realize how deeply Leigh was affected by her family’s welcoming. She herself hadn’t realized how she would feel. True, she had been nervous about meeting them, about possible rejection, but Leigh hadn’t understood how very lonely she’d been. She had been lost, and suddenly she felt at home. That she had found her roots in the past only made sense.

  Jeremiah’s blue eyes sparkled, and Leigh could have sworn he had tears in them. She looked up at Will.

  “Thank you,” she finally said in a tight throat. “Thank you so much! It’s wonderful to meet you all!”

  Leigh looked down at the sleeping baby, and Rosanna opened her arms.

  “Do you like babies? Do you want to hold her?”

  “Oh, I don’t know if I can,” she said, throwing Jeremiah a silent inquiry.

  “Yes, of course you can.”

  “Yes, please!” Leigh took Jane into her arms and cradled her. A tiny wisp of dark-copper hair peeped out from under her bonnet. Leigh looked up at her great grandparents.

  “Thank you for being so welcoming,” she said.

  “Well, if I were that welcoming, I’d had you into the house,” Nancy said with a crooked smile, “but it’s a rare sunny day here, and this is the best place in the world. Turn around and you can see Mount Rainier from here.”

  Leigh turned, and indeed there was the top of the snow-capped volcanic mountain. Fields surrounded the house, allowing for an unimpeded view.

  “This is beautiful! I’ll bet this house stands for a hundred years or more.” She threw Jeremiah and Jefferson a knowing look.

  “Well, it’s sturdy enough. I sure hope it does,” Nancy said. “Let’s all sit down for a moment.”

  Everyone complied, sorting themselves out into various chairs. Leigh offered Rosanna the baby, but Rosanna insisted she continue to hold her, and Leigh was happy to comply.

  Nancy spoke as if she was the matriarch of a family meeting. She was, in fact.

  “I told Rosanna about you and my father. She’s never even met him, but she thinks I should go down and see him.”

  “I do,” Rosanna said. “I would go if I could, but I guess Dr. Cook here says that I shouldn’t.”

  “No, it would not be wise for you, and most definitely not the baby.”

  “I understand,” Rosanna said.

  “I love my daughter,” Nancy said, swallowing as she looked at Rosanna. “She’s smart as a whip. If she thinks it’s time to mend fences, then I’ll do it. We’ve got the new baby, and maybe it is time to let the past go.”

  Tears slipped down Leigh’s cheeks, and she wiped at them before they fell onto Jane’s sweet chubby cheeks.

  “Thank you,” she said. “Thank you.”

  “I’ll come down tomorrow,” Nancy said. “Will can drive me down.”

  “Harry will be so pleased to see you,” Jeremiah said.

  “Just as long as you all know that I’m doing this for Rosanna, for Jane, so that we can bury all this bad blood. I’d been thinking about it for some time now, but couldn’t get up the gumption to go down to Kaskade and see Harry.”

  “We understand,” Jeremiah said. He gave them the directions to his house, and Will repeated them, committing them to memory.

  Jane opened her eyes. Slate blue as most baby’s eyes were, the irises already contained the white flecks that the Johnson family shared. She smiled briefly at Leigh before seeing her mother, at which point she started to wail. Rosanna laughed and took Jane from Leigh.

  “I’d better take her upstairs and feed her,” she said, rising. “I hope to see you again soon, cousin.”

  Leigh rose, feeling it was up to her to make the move to leave.

  “We should go. The minister’s wife is looking after Harry while we’re up here.”

  The rest of the group stood up, and Rosanna gave Leigh another hug before going into the ho
use.

  “See you tomorrow,” Will said, turning to follow his wife inside.

  “I’ll see you tomorrow too,” Nancy said. She folded Leigh into a hug and released her before saying goodbye to Jeremiah and Jefferson. She waited on the porch while they returned to the buggy and Jefferson’s horse.

  Jeremiah maneuvered the buggy around, and Leigh waved at Nancy one final time. She felt a sense of emptiness in her arms now that Jane had been returned to her mother.

  Leigh mused aloud. “You know, I never knew what the expression ‘my arms ache to hold a baby’ meant before now, but I feel it. I feel the loss of the baby in my arms.” She looked over her shoulder to see Nancy still watching them make their way down the lane toward the road.

  “I thought I didn’t have a maternal bone in my body. It’s not that I didn’t want kids, just that I didn’t know that I wanted kids.”

  “I am confused,” Jeremiah said. “Are you saying that you do want children?”

  “Yes, I believe I do. Someday.”

  “How did it feel to hold one of your grandmothers in your arms?” Jeremiah asked.

  “Surreal. But mostly just wonderful. I loved Jane instantly...for being an adorable baby, for being my great-grandmother.”

  “I cannot imagine how it must have felt.”

  Leigh crossed her empty arms over her chest.

  “Is it time for lunch, Jefferson?” she asked.

  “I am starved!” Jefferson answered, riding down the road beside her.

  “Me too!” Leigh exclaimed, still buoyed up by meeting her relatives. “I was just telling Jeremiah that holding Jane made me think that having a baby wasn’t a half-bad idea. In fact, I rather liked it! Okay, I loved it. I see it in my future.”

  “Ah! Better you than I,” Jefferson stated. “I do not see myself as a father. I might make a good husband, but children seem to require a lot of care. I am not at all certain fatherhood is in the cards for me.”

  Leigh thought fast. “Well, I hate to point out the obvious, Jefferson, but if you marry, how are you going to avoid fatherhood?”

  “There is that question, is there not?” Jefferson smiled again. “Right now though, I am debating what I shall order for lunch.”

  Jefferson deflected the question successfully, and Leigh studied him. For such a warm and good-natured man, his ambiguously negative response about children, though congenial enough, surprised her.

  Chapter Seventeen

  The following day, Jeremiah heard a commotion at the front door, and he emerged from his office to see Nancy and Will being ushered into the house by Leigh. The look of elation on her face was evident, and his heart swelled at the sight of her happiness.

  Since her arrival in Kaskade, he had seen her laugh, had seen her angry, confused, irritated, even amused, but he had not seen a warmth in her “robin’s-egg eyes” until she discovered Harry and ultimately his daughter and granddaughter. That she had craved the love of family was obvious. It was also clear that she had not realized how much she had missed being part of a family.

  Jeremiah had not struggled overly much with such yearnings. He could not remember his mother, and although he missed his father’s company, he knew his father had enjoyed a fulfilling life. If he had to examine why he had not pined for family, while Leigh quite obviously had, he surmised that Mrs. Jackson had filled the void for him. She had been with the family since he was a child, and he had come to rely upon her as a member, a relative.

  “Come in! Come in!” Leigh said enthusiastically. “Gran—”

  Jeremiah froze in the hall.

  “Nancy! Will! Come in,” Leigh corrected herself.

  At that, Jeremiah moved forward to welcome them. “Yes, please come in. Would you like to see Harry right away, or do you have time for tea or coffee?”

  “Can you stay for lunch?” Leigh asked. “Mrs. Jackson asked if you were staying for lunch today. I didn’t know if you could, so she went ahead and made enough food for all of us.”

  Nancy smiled, though she had a wary look in her eyes. Jeremiah did not believe it was on Leigh’s account but was probably the anxiety of seeing her father after so many years.

  “Sure, I could use a cup of coffee,” Nancy said. “I haven’t been down to Kaskade in years. I remembered it as being closer.”

  Jeremiah ushered the group into the parlor. Mrs. Jackson appeared in the doorway, and introductions were made.

  “Could you bring us some coffee, Mrs. Jackson?”

  “Of course.” She looked at Leigh. “Did you ask your guests if—”

  “I did. You are staying for lunch, aren’t you?”

  Nancy looked at Will, who shrugged.

  “Sure, that would be nice. Thank you.”

  “Good,” Leigh and Jeremiah said at the same time. Mrs. Jackson nodded and left the parlor.

  “This is a pretty grand house,” Nancy said. “I knew Kaskade had a few grand houses, but I never thought I’d be sitting in the parlor of one.”

  Jeremiah smiled. “My father had it built. It is home.”

  “And you are the only doctor in town?” Will asked.

  Jeremiah had already noted that he was a quiet man, not necessarily cowed by Nancy, but accommodating of her. Perhaps out of love for his wife, or maybe he just loved his mother-in-law. It had been known to happen.

  “Yes. My father was a doctor before me. Sometimes I wish I wasn’t the only doctor. I am often called out to the logging and fishing camps and little settlements that aren’t large enough to warrant a name.”

  Will nodded.

  “How is Harry today?” Nancy asked.

  “Excited and nervous about seeing you,” Jeremiah responded. “Did he say anything particularly to you, Leigh?”

  “The same. Like you said, he’s excited and nervous. I don’t want to speak for him or advocate for him. We asked you to come see him, and you did, and that’s all we can do. The rest is up to him, really.”

  “And Nancy,” Will offered in a practical voice.

  “I didn’t want to say that,” Leigh said with a crooked smile.

  Mrs. Jackson returned quickly with a coffee service and set it on the table in front of the sofa. She poured out cups and handed them out before leaving the room again.

  “So that is your housekeeper?” Nancy asked.

  “Yes, Mrs. Jackson. She has been with the family since I was a young child. I was just thinking yesterday that I have been blessed with her presence in my life since my mother died. I was very young when she died, and Mrs. Jackson filled that void for me.”

  Jeremiah caught Leigh staring at him, and he realized he had said quite a mouthful, revealing much.

  “Family is important,” Nancy said. “All types of family—cousins, in-laws, even longtime servants.”

  “I agree with you,” Jeremiah said. “With the exception of the word ‘servant.’ I have never really thought of Mrs. Jackson that way, and I realized yesterday that in a very real sense, she is family to me.”

  “What a nice thing to say,” Leigh said.

  “The doctor seems like a very nice man,” Nancy said. “So you’re working here for the doctor? In his office? Are you a nurse?”

  Leigh shook her head. “I haven’t started yet, but I’m going to as soon as Harry is better.”

  “She has started in that she is taking care of Harry, but no, Leigh is not a nurse.”

  “No, most certainly not,” she murmured.

  “I hear a story there,” Will offered.

  Leigh gave her great-grandfather an unusually affectionate, trusting smile. Jeremiah was surprised to hear her disclose information about her mother, her husband, Sam, and what she termed her “phobia” about all things medical.

  “Given all that worry, it’s surprising that you would take a job with the local doctor, especially a live-in job. Or are you two closer than you’re letting on?” Nancy asked.

  “What? Jeremiah and I? No!” Leigh protested hastily. “No, Jeremiah has been great to me, but
strictly professionally.”

  Jeremiah knew that wasn’t true, and it seemed clear that Will and Nancy suspected his interest in her was not strictly professional. He dropped his eyes to his coffee to contemplate his growing adoration of Mrs. Leigh Peters. A silence ensued, broken by Leigh, and he looked up.

  “If the good doctor were listening, he would agree with me. I came here without a job, and he offered me one.”

  “But how did you end up taking care of my father?” Nancy asked. “He’s your cousin as well, isn’t he? Or is he an uncle? Forgive me. I still don’t know the exact connection, though there is no doubt that there is one.”

  Leigh bit her lip. “Well...” she began.

  “It was entirely by coincidence. Given that Leigh was a recent widow and a newcomer to Kaskade, I offered her room, board and a small salary in exchange for help with appointments and bookkeeping. She graciously accepted. I could not have cared for Harry without her help. Some time after meeting Harry, Leigh discovered that they are cousins. I do not think she mentioned it to Harry, given that he was so ill.”

  “No, I didn’t tell him,” Leigh agreed. She met Jeremiah’s eyes with a look of gratitude.

  “I forgot, or maybe I didn’t hear yesterday,” Nancy said. “Where did you say you came from, Leigh? What brought you to Kaskade, of all places?”

  Leigh’s eyes blinked, and Jeremiah wondered if he should invent a story on her behalf. But she spoke quickly.

  “Iowa,” Leigh offered. “I lived in Iowa. After my husband died, I wanted to leave Iowa and move west. Doesn’t everyone?” She raised her hands in a quaint gesture and grinned. “I decided to visit Kaskade because I’d heard we had relatives in the area, but I liked it so well, I decided to stay for a while.”

  Jeremiah gave her an approving nod, and she lifted her chin and smiled at him. His heart rolled over.

  “And you came up to see us! We’re so glad that you did,” Nancy said with a broad smile.

  Leigh appeared to delight in Nancy’s welcome, and her eyes sparkled. She cast a blissful smile upon everyone in the parlor.

  “We are glad to have Leigh in Kaskade,” Jeremiah said in a husky voice. “She is a most welcome addition.”