Savage Saviors: The Complete Boxset (Savage Saviors MC)

by J. C. Allen

  I blushed at that, feeling both a twinge of jealousy at the thought as well as a mighty wave of sorrow for Derek. Knowing how things turned out made such a happy story into a bitter tragedy.

  “Maggie woulda liked ya,” Matty said, extending an olive branch of sorts. “An’ I think she’d agree that yer exactly what Derek needs.”

  “Th-thanks, Matty,” I said. “I think… well, I feel better knowing that.”

  I wasn’t sure that I believed that entirely. Someone who had been there from the start wasn’t likely to take kindly to a newcomer, especially when said newcomer had literally come off of the streets and from a rival club, even if said rival club had produced nothing but heartache and pain.

  But damnit, I needed all of the confidence boosts I could get right now, no matter how flimsy and ungrounded in reality they were.

  “Roost,” he said. “An’ it’s no prob.”

  “You said I could call you Matty.”

  “Sheeit, yer right,” he said, as if fully regretting the moment.

  Our food came and we once again fell into a silence, but this time, it was a slightly less contentious internal one. My mind didn’t battle with me as much as before, and my depression didn’t have as strong a grip as before. I couldn’t pretend that I was back to normal—no such thing would occur until Derek and I had made peace in some fashion, but at least compared to five minutes ago, I felt much better.

  Sometimes, you need friends instead of a boyfriend, I thought with a grin.

  When Matty had finished his fifth biscuit and God knows how many strips of bacon, he patted his belly and looked at me with a grin.

  “Hey, I gotta go downtown to pick up some supplies after brunch. Ya wanna join? There’s a few cool little shops ‘round there ya might like. Might be good for ya to get away some.”

  “That would be nice,” I said with a smile, immediately realizing I could use the opportunity to get Derek a gift—a sort of reconciliation offering, even if I wasn’t even sure if I had done anything wrong. I just knew things overall were wrong, and I wasn’t going to let that continue.

  If anything, it could be a way of saying “I know what your life is like.” Like Derek, as it turned out, I hadn’t grown up with many friends, and I wished I had someone like him growing up. Even though Matty seemed to occupy the role of a friend, I couldn’t help but see a paternal connection, and even I felt like I was being “adopted”—for lack of a better word—by the jolly gay giant.

  But it was far, far better than being cooped up in that apartment with nothing.

  I found myself hoping all over again that things with Derek would turn out alright. I was too in love with my new life and everyone in it to have to go back to square one.

  I followed Matty out to his bike and admired the fresh paint, realizing I did so only in contrast to the beat-up state that Derek’s bike was in. I felt a little guilty about that—to say nothing about riding with Matty, which in itself felt like an odd form of cheating—but given the chance to get Derek something, I suppose I would “cheat” to show my loyalty.

  “Hop on, Eve,” Matty commanded.

  “You used to having someone on your bike?” I said out of curiosity.

  Matty shrugged, as if the question didn’t matter. But I thought about how Derek had answered that question, how he had said yes, there had been others. For Matty to not say it…

  Suddenly, my curiosity took on the target of a new person.

  “Matty?” I asked just before I got on. “Why don’t you have someone in your life?”

  “Me?” Matty said, as if stunned that someone would actually ask him such a question. “Well, I’m married to my work, I guess.”

  It was the least convincing answer I had ever heard Matty give. I felt a little concerned about straying into personal territory, but for how we’d bonded ever since Derek had gone into the coma, I felt like it was an issue I could broach… with some care.

  “Really? I’m sure you could find someone nice. There’s a few gay bars in the area even, have you been to any of them? I—”

  “Don’t ya be worrying about my love life,” he said sharply, ending that conversation right there. “I’m fine with how I am.”

  I bit my lip, hoping I didn’t offend him. I didn’t want to lose one of the small list of allies I had in my life.

  Which was a crazy thought—it wasn’t like one bad question would suddenly ruin everything that we had. It’s not like Matty would make me a blacklisted member of the Savage Saviors because I’d asked an innocent question.

  Right?

  Just the fact that I was having these self-doubts… the past few days were weighing on me heavily. Chuck, Derek, the things being hidden from me with the Saviors…

  “There was somebody,” Matty said, snapping me out of my thoughts. “But when he found out what I did for a livin’, well…he didn’t want nothing to do with it.”

  “I’m sorry for that, Matty,” I said, squeezing his shoulders reassuringly.

  Matty, for just a second, almost looked emotional.

  But it only lasted a second, because he quickly put his sunglasses on, coughed, and revved the engine alive.

  “Yer a good girl, Eve,” Matty said. “C’mon. Let’s get yer butt to a mall.”

  We moved through the streets with more caution than Derek had ever demonstrated—it was pretty obvious who was the older of the two based on driving styles alone. Not that Matty was exactly safe, per se, but I didn’t fear a spill-out or head-on collision like I had with Derek my first few rides.

  He turned the bike onto another street, pulling to the side and parking the bike so quickly I felt I had barely gotten a feel for his bike. It felt good between my legs—was that bad to say?

  In any case, I moved off the bike, handing him the helmet and looked around. The strip mall consisted of a few small local shops, including a video game store, a clothing store, a parts store, and a small bakery.

  “I’ll be over there,” Matty said, looking at the mechanic shop. Wonder why he’s not going to the Saviors shop.

  Ohhhhh….

  “That shop there,” he said, looking at the clothing shop before I could dig further into what sort of activities he would be doing at the mechanic shop. “They might promote themselves as clothes, but they gotta whole ton o’ cool knick-knacks if you wanna check ‘em out.”

  “I think I will,” I said. “Meet me there when you’re done?”

  “Will do,” he said, heading towards the parts shop.

  Some mysteries are just best left unsolved or unanswered. You want in on the biker’s life? You have to know what you need to know and what you don’t need to know. Whatever he’s doing there is his business, Eve.

  Don’t go nosing around. You know, like you did with Derek’s notebook and stuff.

  Sigh.

  Make it right with a nice gift.

  Taking a deep breath, I headed inside the shop, deciding that I’d buy something that meant just as much as the bird pendant he’d gotten me on the first date.

  Of course, that was easier said than done, but that didn’t mean it couldn’t be done.

  While the shop did have a good amount of clothes for sale, the other half of the store sold a myriad of random stuff. I began to look around, wondering if I would be able to find anything for Derek here.

  As I made my way to the last aisle, in fact, I began to lose hope.

  I hadn’t even realized how much I wanted to find something to give to Derek. I wanted to be able to show my thanks, wanted to see the familiar smile I’d grown to love as I handed over whatever it was that I’d found for him.

  Face it, Eve. Things are only going to get worse. You’re lost. You did something to cause him to distrust you and you deserve it.

  I remembered Derek’s cold eyes and shivered again. I closed my eyes, willing myself to relax. I didn’t know what was going on with Derek and I didn’t have any right to assume anything.

  Things will be fine when I get home. I k
now it.

  Right?

  Finishing down the aisle, I sighed, not able to find anything. Typical. I headed out, seeing Matty stepping out of the parts store. He seemed to see something on my face and moved closer.

  “Ya okay? Somethin’ happen?” he asked, looking around as he did.

  There was a violent edge to his scanning gaze, and I realized that I wouldn’t want to be a person caught in that radar. Really, any radar from any Saviors.

  That’s why they’re named as such.

  “I’m fine,” I said, which was true in the context of what he thought it meant… but… “I think I’m just tired. Rough night worrying about Derek and all. I think I’m going to call an Uber and get home. I’m sure you’ve got to get back to work.”

  Matty looked at me with that familiar cocked eyebrow, as if telling me “I know ya full of it.” And I was—I was full of doubt, self-loathing, and a real fear that I was losing the only stable thing in my life. I feared that my inability to even do a tenth of what he did would spell my doom.

  And it was nothing Matty could help me with, nor was it anything I felt like he should know of.

  “Ya sure?” he said with a frown. “It’s not a problem fer me to drop ya off at home.”

  “I said it’s fine,” I said with a bit more venom than I intended. “I need a bit on my own, anyway.”

  There was something to Matty’s face in that exact moment that somehow made the bottom of my stomach drop even further. It looked like… recognition? Surprise?

  Why would he show recognition, anyways?

  Unless he had had a similar conversation and heard similar words from Derek… in which… case…

  “Alright, be careful though.”

  It’s not caution I’m worried about right now.

  “I will be.”

  I watched as he sauntered over to his motorcycle. He kept looking back at me, concern filled his face. I offered him a fake, reassuring smile as I pulled my phone out. I called for the ride.

  The ride was there ten minutes later and I slid in.

  “Just to confirm, going to 155 W. Main Street?”

  I was about to open my mouth to say yes.

  But… was I really going to give up that easily?

  Was I really going to just say that because I couldn’t get a gift for Derek that easily, I was just not going to get him anything at all?

  The man loved his whiskey and gin.

  “Yes, but,’ I said. “Let’s make a pit stop at the nearest liquor store.”

  Admittedly, it was nowhere near as personal a gift as the necklace Derek had gotten me. That was a necklace I still wore even now—a bottle of liquor could go by in a single night. But I was, unfortunately, desperate to make peace.

  Even though I wasn’t sure peace needed to be made. I was just a bit crazy.

  “You know the meter runs—”

  “That’s fine,” I said dismissively.

  The driver shrugged and began driving me home, stopping at a liquor store en route. I hurried in, went to the whiskey section, and grabbed an expensive bottle of Johnnie Walker, not even blinking at the price. The man knows his drinks. He’ll appreciate it.

  I was in and out of the shop in less than five minutes, though that was more because I was so eager to see Derek and try and make things right, not because I wanted to save money on the Uber ride. The driver finished the route quickly and dropped me off.

  Nervously, I approached the elevator, feeling a little nervous about how Derek would react. Would this look like a bribe? Or a gift? Would he like it, or dismiss it? I knew he was too kind to outright mock me or get rid of it, though of course because I thought of that, I began considering it as a possibility.

  The doors opened, and I stepped forward.

  “Derek?” I said.

  On the couch, he sat there, staring at the ceiling.

  “Derek,” I said as calmly as I could. “I got you something.”

  He looked up at me, his expression difficult to read.

  “Are you OK?”

  I showed him the bottle of Johnnie Walker with a pleading grin.

  “You got me that?”

  He sounded surprised, as if he couldn’t believe it. I tried so hard not to take anything at face value and to let this scene play out, but damnit, my emotions were just too far over the place.

  “I did,” I said. “I thought it would help you with whatever’s going on.”

  He looked at it some more, examining it as a forensic specialist might look at a crime scene. He ran his hands over it, read the labels, and examined it such that I feared he’d just shove it back in my chest and say “do better.”

  “Nice,” he said simply. “Thanks.”

  He looked at me with some confusion—he looked like he wanted to smile and appreciate it, but he also just didn’t look like he could really enjoy it.

  “I, umm, I have to get going to the shop,” he said. “But listen, let’s enjoy this later, OK?”

  “OK…”

  He moved by me quickly, brushing past me, not even giving me a kiss.

  “Derek?”

  He turned.

  “Are we OK?”

  I had chosen the word “we” on purpose. I knew he wasn’t OK. I could pretend not to know that he saw my brother, but I could not pretend that that visit had affected him in some fashion.

  “We’ll talk later.”

  It was all he left me with, leaving the bottle of Johnnie Walker on the counter as he took the elevator down.

  “Derek…”

  Tears began to stream down my eyes as I realized the terrible truth—no answer might as well have been an answer of no.

  27

  Derek

  The fuck is wrong with you?

  I scolded myself as I took the elevator down, wanting to still be angry at Eve for everything that I had realized in the last twenty-four hours. I wanted to feel disgust for all of those times she had secretly gone out to be a hooker.

  But… what she had just done, I could not pretend was fake.

  Or… could I? What if it was a bribe? What if it was a cover for her having gone to be a hooker?

  As it was, I already had to go to the shop to discuss some business with Roost. It provided me a convenient excuse to get out and not have to have the talk I really dreaded. But it sure looked bad.

  I wasn’t ready to call it off, not until I heard her side of it.

  But boy…

  The evidence wasn’t great, no matter how much I wanted to believe otherwise. No matter how much I wanted to think that Chuck Kellerman was a lying piece of shit, it was hard to argue with photographic evidence.

  I roared on my bike and sped out to the shop, forgetting all of the promises I had made to myself about driving safer and being a good citizen. I mean, if Eve and I were about to split, then it was hard to say it was worth living, right? It wasn’t worth dying over, but the drive to live sure didn’t have much reason to be around any longer.

  When I pulled up to the rear of the shop, I saw Roost looking hot and red in the face. I didn’t see him like this often, and it told me something bad had happened—not a death, but something worse.

  “Roost, what’s—”

  “Tyler left.”

  “I’m sorry?”

  “Went to the goddamn Falcons.”

  Fuck.

  Fuck!

  Of all the ways the Falcons could hurt us the most, it was betrayal that stung like no other. Death was tragic, but permanent—the secrets of the Saviors went to the grave with their bodies. Attacks were just that—expected part of warfare.

  But defections, betrayal, Benedict Arnold types—those were the ones that could enrage both Roost and I to the point of breaking the entire store in half out of frustration.

  “Fucking asshole even left me a note at the hospital,” I growled.

  “Hidin’ his intentions, no doubt,” Roost said.

  Like Eve…

  Really, Derek, you’re just—

>   Damn straight.

  “This is just one of many salvos comin’ our way, Derek,” Roost warned. “This is what it looks like when the Falcon gets his head in.”

  “Goddamnit!” I roared.

  I didn’t much care if the entire shop heard. In fact, I wanted them to hear my rage. I wanted them to know how I felt about traitors and what I would do to them if they showed their face again.

  Let’s just say the punishment for Chuck was much less severe than what I would do to a traitor. The punishment I’d given the man who had almost killed Eve was close to it, but it was tough to know which was worse until I actually got there.

  “Life’s ‘bout to get ‘lot more mind-fucked,” Roost said.

  “Already is,” I said.

  Roost looked at me askance. Then his next words almost pinned me.

  “Ya alright with yer girl?”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “I had brunch with her today. She’s nervous, she’s worried ‘bout ya. She thinks some shit’s goin’ on.”

  “Well…”

  I sighed, thinking about what Chuck had said. I almost—almost—cracked and told Roost every fucking sordid detail that Chuck had told me, about all the photos that he’d given to me, all of the troubling truths that were presented to me.

  But they paled in comparison to a member of our club going to the most evil group there was. This was personal. That was serious business that had to be dealt with.

  “It’s fine. Just some stuff, but she bought me a bottle of whiskey. We’re good.”

  “What, today?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Huh, strange. Didn’t see her do that. Anywho…”

  Roost went on some bit about how Tyler’s situation would need to be addressed to the rest of the club—not that it was much of a secret—but that was the last thing I was thinking about.

  Instead, it was the final nail in the coffin of my relationship with Eve.