by Harte, Marie
“It’s Ian.”
“I know.” Jack cursed again. “I need Gavin back. I need you on the floor. And I need you available for missions, and more than just work for Stallbridge. I might have a few independent contracts coming our way.”
“Outstanding.” Aidan liked the thought of real-world operations. But this time, for something more than a stupid book. “So that book we got back. It’s that important?”
A closed look came over Jack’s face. His eyes flashed with something Aidan couldn’t read. “So I’ve heard. Look, I gotta get back. Hurry up and heal, fix your pathetic private life, and I’ll see you Wednesday morning, sharp.”
Jack left without another word.
“My life’s pathetic? He should talk,” Aidan murmured. He glanced at Gavin, so at peace, and sighed. Hell. He loves the unlovable—me. And I think—hell, I know—I love him. Where the hell do we go from here?
GAVIN WOKE UP with a doozy of a headache. He blinked up at the ceiling in Aidan’s bedroom, not sure what the hell had happened. One minute he’d been floating with Aidan in the air, in his arms. He remembered a lot of talk about love, and how Aidan couldn’t feel that particular emotion for anyone. Then Gavin had put his foot in his mouth and told Aidan how he felt.
Stupid, stupid, stupid.
He didn’t know why he thought he had all the answers. Hell, he’d gotten lucky on a case, had a little too much confidence, and suddenly, he knew everything. He groaned, praying Aidan wouldn’t kick him out for either his arrogance or for dropping them both. He still wasn’t sure how he’d gotten down, naked, and into bed.
“Good. You’re awake.”
A glance at the doorway showed Aidan, dressed as usual in jeans and a button-up shirt that accentuated his broad chest. He smiled, a brilliant grin that took Gavin’s breath away.
“Uh, yeah.” Gavin cleared his throat and tried to build a wall, so Aidan wouldn’t know how pathetically in love he was.
“You took two darts, and we weren’t sure how long you’d be out. But Doc Cannon said the drugs weren’t harmful, just put you to sleep.”
“Huh?” Gavin sat up, and the sheets fell to his waist. He felt uncomfortable and vulnerable, especially since Aidan had no problem staring. “I need to piss.”
“Lovely.” Aidan shook his head. “The bathroom is open. Use whatever you need. I’ll wait.”
Gavin shot out of bed and used the facilities. Then he took a long, hot shower, soothing aching muscles he hadn’t known he had. After drying off, he brushed his teeth, feeling like himself again. He didn’t have clothes with him, but he didn’t want to leave wearing only a towel. He was already at a disadvantage when it came to Aidan. Being half-naked wouldn’t help. When he spied Aidan’s dark blue robe, he had his answer.
He exited and found Aidan waiting for him, sitting on the edge of the bed.
Aidan turned at the sound of Gavin’s feet slapping on the hardwood floor. He stared, and the hint of a grin turned him from dark and sexy to beautiful. Gavin swallowed hard. “Can I have some clothes? My bag should be in the other room.”
“No.”
“No, it’s not in the other room? Or no, I can’t have any clothes?” When Aidan just kept staring with that odd smile on his face, Gavin lost his patience. “What the hell is your problem?” He felt a blush creeping across his cheeks and stopped in his tracks.
“You’re hot. You know that?” Aidan laughed when Gavin blushed harder.
“Shut up.”
“And so damn cute.”
Aidan smiled at him again, and Gavin wondered if he’d fallen into another dimension, where the impossible happened on a regular basis. Aidan complimenting him and smiling weren’t normal. Appreciated, but not normal.
“You don’t remember anything, do you?”
“About what? We were in the air, and then nothing.” And I was telling you how much you love me. I’m such a dumb-ass.
Aidan shook his head. “You missed all the fun. Samson Ruelle was here, in the bedroom.”
“You’re kidding.”
“Wish I was. Fucker knocked you out and tried to down me. Then, ah, we kind of got into it. I nailed him just as Jack and the others came barreling in. Samson had a dozen buddies with him surrounding the house, who are now in custody. Samson, unfortunately, didn’t make it.” The flat meanness in Aidan’s eyes spoke volumes.
“Don’t ask me to be sorry about that. Because I’m not.” Gavin clearly remembered how that freakish giant had been all over Aidan. And the abuse Aidan had suffered at his hands still made Gavin want to pound him.
A softening on Aidan’s face warned him to hold his mental shields tight. “You’re not reading me again, are you?”
Aidan coughed. “Ah, no. Not really. I mean, I’m not trying to, but you’re kind of broadcasting. Loudly.”
“Shit.”
Aidan chuckled. “Hearing you curse is too funny. You look so sweet, and then that mouth opens up.”
“Fuck you.”
Aidan laughed harder.
Gavin didn’t know what to make of this man. Aidan seemed so open, so, well, friendly. He watched with longing, wishing he could keep his lover like this all the time.
Aidan tapered off and sighed. “You’re going to make me say it. I know you. You like making me verbalize.”
“Big word, Blondie.”
Aidan shot him the finger. Finally. Some normalcy.
“I remember everything you said to me, and what I said to you.” Aidan’s voice grew deeper. “It’s hard for me to open up. I’ve never shared as much with anyone as I have with you. The others, they don’t know the circumstances around my father. And the other stuff.” The abuse.
“I’m not going to say anything. I’d never tell.”
“I know.” Aidan looked at him with the deepest, brownest eyes, and in them, Gavin thought he saw love. “You didn’t mention my mind-warping abilities, for which I’m thankful. But Jack knows. And Ian hinted a time or two.”
“How does Jack know?” Gavin narrowed his gaze. “You used it to kill Samson, didn’t you?”
“In a way. Actually, I manipulated his mind. I don’t normally do that, as it takes a lot of energy. And frankly, I don’t want anyone looking at me like I’m a total freak.”
Gavin grinned. “Too late.”
“Dick.” But Aidan’s smile removed the bite, because he knew Gavin considered him no such thing. “Look, you can’t tell anyone what I just told you, or what I’m about to tell you. I was sworn to secrecy on this.”
Yet he would share with Gavin? Pleased and making no effort to hide it, Gavin nodded and took a seat next to Aidan on the bed. He leaned forward. “What?”
“Well, when Jack rushed into the room, he looked like Tyler, Kerr’s other right-hand man. I mean, the guy wasn’t in disguise. He was Tyler. I thought he was going to kill you, so I did what I had to do. Except it wasn’t Tyler, as I found out when Jack literally shifted shape right there in front of me.”
“Holy crap. Jack can change his appearance?”
“Apparently.” Aidan let out a breath. “But you can’t mention it.”
“I won’t.” His mind buzzed. “Damn. That’s incredible.” Then something Aidan said penetrated. “Wait. You were afraid Tyler would kill me? What about you?”
Aidan shrugged and glanced away. “I pretty much figured it didn’t matter. I was flaming out, so why not go out with a bang?” He glanced back at Gavin, and to Gavin’s shock, his eyes had filled with tears. “Knowing you loved me made it all worthwhile.”
“Jesus, Aidan.” Gavin moved closer and cupped Aidan’s face in his hands. He wiped away a tear that trickled over that smooth, stubborn cheek. “Don’t cry. I love you. It’s unconditional.” He smiled, knowing how to get to his lover. “I mean, if I can love you when you’re an arrogant dickhead who’s always telling me what to do, then I can pretty much love you all the time, you know?”
Aidan’s snort of laughter was a balm to that part of him that hated seein
g Aidan hurt. Gavin knew it would take time before Aidan could come to feel the same for him, but he was a patient man. He could wait.
“When we touch, I read you, especially when you want me to,” Aidan said quietly as he stared into Gavin’s eyes. “I don’t need time, not to tell you how I feel.”
Gavin’s heart raced, and he slowly removed his hands from Aidan’s face. But Aidan caught them and placed them against his heart. “I’m not an easy man. I like things done a certain way, and yeah, I get off on being in charge in bed.”
Gavin could feel Aidan’s nervousness and just stared, amazed Aidan might be going where Gavin desperately wanted him to go.
“I felt so much more for you than I should have, right from the beginning. You deserve more than me. You’re smart, intelligent, handsome, and let’s face it, you’re hung like a horse.”
“I prefer stallion.” Gavin smiled.
Aidan let out a breath, as if annoyed, but Gavin read his amusement. “Thing is, I never meant to let myself fall for you. I kept telling myself it was the case, that we had to trust each other because of the nature of our undercover work. But I feel for you, Gavin. You worked your way inside me, and you won’t go away.” Aidan frowned. “I tried, believe me. And I know it hasn’t been that long since we’ve been together. But I—” He paused, and Gavin waited. No way in hell he’d rush this. “I want you to move in here. I want us to be together. I mean, sleeping, eating, everything. I’m not an easy person to get along with, but I think you and I fit.”
“And?” Gavin tried to tamper his amusement. Aidan looked alarmed, but he wouldn’t release Gavin’s hands against his chest.
“Fuck.”
“I want you to say it.”
“Can’t you hear it?” “I love you, damn it.”
“Out loud, please.” Gavin wanted to jump up and down, exuberant that what he’d always been hoping for was almost his for the taking. “They’re just words, Aidan.”
“Not to me they’re not. Only one person has ever said this to me in my life. And she died a very long time ago.” Aidan’s breath hitched. “I love you.”
“You are absolutely beautiful when you’re scared. Never thought I’d say that.”
Aidan burst out laughing. “You’re such a little shit. No wonder I love you.”
“It gets easier every time you say it. Watch. I love you back, Aidan Marshall.”
Aidan leaned in for a kiss, and Gavin never wanted this moment to end.
When they parted for breath, Aidan added, “There’s just one more thing.”
“Yeah?”
“I want you to do something for me. You don’t have to, but I think it would help.”
“Anything.” And he meant that with his whole heart. “Aidan, I’d do anything for you.”
But holy hell, he’d never imagined what his lover would want him to do. Not in a million years.
Chapter Thirteen
Gavin stared down at the most bitable ass he’d ever seen. Aidan lay naked on his stomach, his legs and arms splayed, his body Gavin’s for the taking. Every one of those glorious muscles was taut, Aidan’s unease obvious.
“We don’t have to do this. I love you no matter what. And I like when you boss me around in bed.”
“Don’t worry. This is kind of a one-shot deal. I think.” Aidan’s voice sounded gravelly. “I just need to know I can handle this. Samson messed me up, Gavin. I haven’t been able to get him out of my head. I mean, I’ve handled plenty of cases dealing with scum, but none of them centered on me the way he did.”
Gavin stroked his back, not liking the way Aidan shivered. This was too soon, especially after Aidan’s confession. He would do his best to get Aidan into therapy, but he knew that would be an uphill battle. But there were things he could do that would ease his partner into relaxing and being at peace.
“I hear you, you know.” Aidan sounded amused. “I’m not that thickheaded.”
“Please. Next to the word ‘brick’ in the dictionary is a picture of your face.”
“Boy, don’t push me.”
Gavin snickered. “That’s rich. Right now, you’re the boy.” Gavin stroked his lover’s back and buttocks, loving the feel of such hard, firm flesh. “But I can’t do what you want. I won’t fuck you, Aidan. It’s not what you need right now. I’m not a mind reader, but I know there’s no fast and hard cure—no pun intended—for getting you over that trauma. I don’t want to add to it. But,” he said quickly to forestall Aidan’s arguments, “there are some things we could do to ease you into relaxing. I love your ass, and I’ve been wanting a taste forever.”
“Yeah?”
Gavin liked the hint of excitement he heard. “Yeah. So you just lay here and let me make you feel good. All for my Master.”
“Damn. You know that gets me hard. Are you wearing the collar?”
“Look.”
Aidan turned his head and saw the black collar he’d put aside for Gavin to wear. Not the one Gavin had used in California, but one Aidan told him he’d been saving for the right man. “You look sexy in it.” Aidan’s gaze moved to Gavin’s thick erection. “So fucking hot.”
He squirmed against the bed, and Gavin reached under him, not surprised to find Aidan huge and hard. “You too.” Gavin leaned down over Aidan’s back. “Now relax. I’m not going to fuck you. I’m going to make love to you with my mouth. Nothing but my tongue, okay?”
Aidan’s muscles relaxed. “You sure? I don’t care if you want to fuck me. Really. I love you.”
Gavin planted kisses on Aidan’s shoulders. “I know. You don’t have to prove it to me. I get it.”
“I won’t be a ball of joy to live with. I’m just warning you.”
Aidan had been telling him the same thing for several minutes, the worry there that Gavin would no doubt leave him soon. That Aidan would offer himself sexually just to keep Gavin around made Gavin hurt for him.
“I don’t need your fucking pity,” Aidan growled. “If that’s all you have to—fuck.”
Gavin’s fingers stroked along Aidan’s crack as he kissed his way down that broad back. “Easy. It’s not pity I’m feeling. God. I need you to feel what I’m feeling. Then I need you to fuck me hard.”
“Sure, baby.” Aidan groaned when Gavin’s mouth found his ass. “Whatever you want.”
“I want you,” Gavin sent him loudly enough to be heard.
“You have me. All of me.” Aidan ground his pelvis against the bed while Gavin nipped his ass, leaving stinging little bites all over that firm body. As he kissed and licked his way between Aidan’s cheeks, he reminded himself to take it slowly. He wanted Aidan to never forget today, and he wanted his lover to see how deeply Gavin felt.
“Tell me if any of it’s too much. I want you to feel so good, Master.”
Aidan liked “Master” even better than “Sir.” And Gavin wanted to do whatever he could to please his selfless partner. Knowing Aidan would have given his life to protect Gavin, just happy to be loved, moved him to be thorough, to show Aidan he deserved every bit of Gavin’s affection.
Gavin kissed him, then pried Aidan’s ass cheeks wider, exposing that pretty little hole. He licked, loving the taste of the man. Soap and musk and Aidan, all wrapped up in one sexy, adorable package.
“Not…adorable…” Aidan moaned as Gavin rimmed him with pleasure. “God, that’s fucking good.”
As Gavin continued to learn his lover, he stroked his tongue deeper, penetrating with short thrusts, careful to keep his mind free of anything but the love and desire he felt for Aidan.
Aidan’s breathy moans and gasps were more frequent while Gavin put more of his tongue inside. He stroked gently, purposefully slow, to build Aidan’s desire.
“I want you. I want to fuck that tight hole. I want to fuck your mouth,” Aidan rasped. “Shit, you’re good.”
Gavin smiled and continued to eat his lover, wanting to make it unforgettable. He ran his hands up and down the insides of Aidan’s thighs while he worked Aidan
with his tongue. And when he grazed Aidan’s balls, Aidan shoved forcibly into the bed.
Gavin wasn’t unaffected either. He was so hard, his slit wet. But he felt no urge to fuck Aidan. He hadn’t been lying. He wasn’t a top. He wanted a hard cock inside him, to ride him while he took his own pleasure from the orgasm building in his Master.
“That’s enough,” Aidan growled. “Get over here on your back. I need to love you.”
Not fuck you. Gavin eased up and found himself on his back, his legs spread and Aidan’s mouth over him in seconds.
“Oh, yeah. Master, please.”
Aidan was ravenous. He licked and sucked, devouring Gavin with need. “Come for me baby. Show me how much you love me.”
The orgasm hit Gavin hard, and he cried out as he gave himself to Aidan without thought, instinctively surrendering to his lover. To his love.
Aidan swallowed him, sucking every bit of cum from Gavin’s cock. Then he left Gavin on the bed while he rummaged through his drawer. He found lubrication and smoothed it all over himself.
“You’re huge,” Gavin croaked, staring dazedly at that monster in Aidan’s hand.
“You made me that way.” Aidan finished and wiped the rest of the lube on Gavin’s belly. “Now watch me come inside you.” Aidan tilted Gavin’s hips and eased inside his ass. He moved slowly, watching Gavin’s face while he joined them mind to mind and flesh to flesh. “You’re a part of me, baby. I can’t let you go.”
“Then don’t.” Gavin reached for Aidan and held on to his forearms on either side of him while Aidan rocked in and out of him. “Fill me up, Master. If it pleases you.”
“Oh, it pleases me.” Aidan’s forehead was beaded with sweat. “You’re so good for me, boy. So damn perfect.” Aidan continued to fuck him and leaned down to kiss Gavin. He lingered, thrusting with his tongue every time he pushed with his cock.
Gavin was lost in the ecstasy of his lover, his Master. Being taken, being given all that love and protection, the desire and affection balled inside his heart and refused to leave.
