Pop Goes the Murder

by Kristi Abbott

  “I’ll go warn her. Tell her to pack her things and leave town. She should stay away from Antoine until we catch Marie Parsons.” Dan shoved his chair back from the table.

  I doubted she’d do it. Her allegiance to Antoine was so extreme she wouldn’t leave him here even if her life literally depended on it. “I have a better idea.”

  “I’m all ears.”

  “Use me as bait.” If the killer was getting rid of people close to Antoine, there could hardly be a better target than me.

  “No.”

  “Hear me out.” The plan had burst into my head. I could see exactly how it should unfold.

  “No.”

  “Dan, it makes perfect sense. After that television interview and the coverage afterward, half the country thinks Antoine and I are getting back together already. It wouldn’t be hard to convince Marie Parsons that it was really true. You could be watching. When she comes after me, you’ll catch her and then this whole nightmare will be over.” And Antoine could leave town and I could go on with my life. We all could go on with our lives.

  “No.”

  “Dan, be reasonable.”

  He stood. “No,” he yelled. “I will not put you in danger. I will not use you as bait for a delusional psychopath. No.”

  Dan never yelled. He barely ever even raised his voice. He didn’t generally have to. He had that quiet command sense that made people stop and listen to him. Dario, Sprocket and I shrank back.

  He sagged. “I’m sorry. I’m tired. I shouldn’t have yelled, but no, Rebecca. Just no. Okay?” He took one last swig of coffee.

  Another possibility occurred to me. “Dan, did you rake the other day?” I asked.

  “Are you kidding? I’ve been so busy I’ve barely had time to go to the bathroom, much less rake.” He shook his head.

  “What about Haley? Was she raking?”

  “Have you looked at her lately? She can barely walk. How is she supposed to rake?”

  “Then who left the rake on my steps?”

  “What rake?” he asked.

  “The one that I nearly tripped over going down my stairs in the dark the other night,” I said. If Sprocket hadn’t growled at it, I never would have seen it. The stairs were steep. If I had tripped over it . . . Well, it might not have been fatal, but it certainly wouldn’t have been pretty.

  “Do you remember what color the handle was?” he asked.

  I shut my eyes. “Red.”

  “Ours is blue,” he said, his voice quiet.

  “Dan, I think it’s possible that Marie Parsons is already after me. I’m already bait. Let’s use that against her.” It made so much sense I couldn’t believe that Dan was hesitating.

  Dario waited two beats and then said, “She’s going to do it anyway. You might as well help her. At least that way she stands half a chance of surviving.”

  “Is that true, Rebecca?” Dan asked.

  I kept my face in Sprocket’s neck. “Probably, although not right at this very second.”

  “Fine,” Dan said, getting up and walking toward the door. “We can talk about it later.”

  Dario and I went back to work. Or as much work as I was able to do. My hands shook. My eyes blurred. I was a walking disaster. At one-thirty, Dario finally benched me. “Please go home? You’re making more work than you’re doing.”

  “That’s some tough love, Dario.” I knew he was right, though.

  He laughed. “It’s the best kind. I’ve got things here covered. Take a nap and be back by three thirty, okay?”

  There wasn’t time for napping, though. Sprocket and I walked over to Dan’s office instead, carrying two take-out coffees and a bag of popcorn bars. Sugar and caffeine can get me through a lot of very bad days.

  The Bunnies were gone from the sidewalk. The press had left, too. Once Antoine was no longer in jail, people had lost interest. Besides, a reality-show star had had a nip slip on an afternoon talk show. Nobody was interested in Melanie’s murder anymore.

  Vera let me in to see Dan.

  He looked up from the papers on his desk, pinched the bridge of his nose for a moment, then took a big breath and said, “Let’s make a plan.”

  We spent the next hour mapping out exactly how we’d convince Marie Parsons that I was back in Antoine’s life for real and forever and how we’d keep her from killing me.

  “I still don’t like it,” Dan said, looking over what we’d sketched out.

  “Do you want this to be over?”

  “Of course.”

  “Do you want Antoine to leave town?”

  “Absolutely.”

  “Got a better plan?”

  He put his head down on the desk and said, “Lord help me, but no.”

  I pulled out my phone and called Garrett.

  “Dead body?” he asked.

  “Nope. At least not yet. Can you come over to Dan’s office? There’s something we want to tell you about.”

  Fifteen minutes later, Garrett sat next to me and across from Dan. He looked back and forth between the two of us and said, “No.”

  “It was my first response, too,” Dan said.

  “Not only no, but hell no,” Garrett said.

  “It was my second response, too.” Dan looked sad.

  “He even yelled at me,” I interjected.

  Garrett swiveled his head and stared at me. “Dan yelled? Dan never yells.”

  “I know.”

  Now Garrett did the thing with pinching the bridge of his nose. I wasn’t sure what that meant. “I saw you almost get shot,” he said, his voice ragged at the edges. “I still have bad dreams about that.”

  I hadn’t known about the bad dreams. I put my hand on his. “I’m sorry.”

  “But not sorry enough to not put yourself in danger.” He didn’t say it like it was a question.

  “I won’t really be in danger. It will just look like I’m in danger.” I’d be protected.

  “This woman has already killed once and come damn close to killing a second time. She’s not going to hesitate.” Garrett turned my hand over as if he was about to tell my fortune.

  “Good. I want this over. I’m sick of it. I’m sick of all this craziness and the media and everything else. Aren’t you?” I asked.

  He nodded. “I am. Very sick of it. I think I was sick of it before it started.” He lifted my hand and dropped a kiss into the palm. “Okay. Let’s do it.”

  * * *

  The next person I needed to get on board with my plan was Antoine. I arranged to meet him at the hotel. It was too far to walk, so Sprocket and I went home to get my car. It was around Evan’s nap time, which these days was also Haley’s nap time. Again, that whole building a human being thing apparently took some energy.

  No such luck. She walked out onto the porch as I walked up the driveway. “What are you doing home?” she asked.

  Then I realized there was one more person I needed to agree to the plan before I tried to talk Antoine into it. Or maybe two. She kind of counted for two these days. I sat down on the steps and laid it all out for her.

  Haley pressed the palms of her hands into her eyes. “You think this will end it?” she asked. “Fast?”

  “That’s the plan.”

  “And Dan’s okay with it?” She dropped her hands back to what there was of her lap.

  “Totally.” She didn’t need to know about his reservations. It wouldn’t help.

  She sighed. “Okay, then. I’m in. What do I need to do to help?”

  “Hold off on that whole going-into-labor thing for a day or two.” She wasn’t due for a couple of more weeks. It shouldn’t be a problem.

  “I’ll try crossing my legs. I’ve heard that’s effective.” She snorted, then stood up and made a shooing gesture. “Well, go on already. Get this over with.”


  * * *

  I drove over to the hotel and made my way to Antoine’s room. He opened the door and let us in. Sprocket didn’t growl, then I realized he was chewing something. “What did you give him?” I asked.

  “A wee piece of cheese. Nothing more.” Antoine ushered us in. “It is just you and me, my sweet,” he said. “Your beau-frère has arranged to have Lucy taken to the airport.”

  “Jason’s still here,” I pointed out.

  “With everyone else gone, I told him he could also go. He and his wife have decided to take a brief vacation together to rekindle their romance.” He paused. “It is a nice idea, is it not? Rekindling a love between a husband and wife?”

  “I’m not your wife anymore, Antoine. I have actual legal papers that say so.” I sat down on the couch.

  “Papers that could be torn up. Or trumped by different papers,” he suggested.

  “Antoine, no.”

  He sighed. “I knew that’s what you would say. I had to try, though.”

  “I need a favor from you, though. I need you to act like that wasn’t what I said.”

  * * *

  By four o’clock that afternoon we were back in the conference room with Lisa from WOHH. This time, I did my own makeup. I might not wear it everyday, but I knew how to put it on and I wasn’t going to let Tanya turn me into Tammy Faye Bakker again.

  Once the cameras were rolling, Lisa looked directly into the camera and said, “We have an update on the status of Antoine Belanger.” Then she turned to me.

  “These terrible tragedies have made me stop and take stock of my life. It’s too short not to go with your heart. Antoine and I are getting back together.” I took his hand and smiled up into his eyes.

  He leaned down and kissed me on the lips. “I am so grateful, my darling. I vow to cherish you forever as you deserve to be cherished.”

  For a second, it all felt a little too real. Antoine had seduced me away from all of them before. He hadn’t even broken a sweat doing it. It wasn’t a big stretch for him to think he could do it again. I wasn’t one hundred percent certain he couldn’t, either. All that charisma was seductive.

  But too many people had sacrificed too much with my return to Grand Lake. Coco had ended up sacrificing her life because of it. There was no way I was giving up now.

  The interview went on with me prattling about how in love with Antoine I was and Antoine making big googly eyes at me.

  “Thanks for the scoop, guys,” Lisa said as we wrapped up.

  “Oh, the pleasure is all ours,” I said, trying to smile. “When will this air?”

  “We’re teasing it for this evening’s broadcast.” Lisa smiled. “We’re going to trounce WCLV in the ratings.”

  After she left, Antoine turned to me. “Now what?”

  “Now we act like the ickiest most loviest-doviest couple Grand Lake has ever seen.”

  * * *

  First we went to the lighthouse, where we strolled along the lake holding hands and stopping to smooch along the way with Sprocket trotting happily beside us. Then we dropped Sprocket off at my apartment. I picked up some clothes and my toothbrush. We went over to Winnie’s Tavern for a drink. Antoine made the mistake of asking for a glass of wine, which he nearly spit back into his glass after the first sip.

  “You should have tried a cocktail,” I said.

  “Probably best not to drink at all,” he said. “Probably smarter to keep our wits about us.”

  He had a point. We were trying to draw out a woman who had killed once and attempted to kill a second time just to get close to Antoine.

  * * *

  The piece on us aired, and the Belanger Bunny social media world went wild. Even if Marie Parsons didn’t see the show, she’d know what was going on. Antoine and I had dinner at the diner. Megan Templeton was nicer to me than she’d ever been before. “How soon you leaving?” she asked when she brought our orders.

  “We haven’t made specific plans yet,” I said.

  “Soon, though?”

  I looked up at her. “Do you want it to be soon?”

  “Things were calmer before you came home, Rebecca. Simpler. You go on back to California, where you belong, and let us be.” She turned on her heel and walked away.

  So much for having won the hearts and minds of my hometown.

  We finished dinner and headed back to the hotel. I texted Dan: Anything?

  He answered: Not a peep.

  Once we got to the hotel, we went straight to Antoine’s room. He opened the door and we both went in and then stopped.

  “Well,” I said. “This isn’t awkward at all.”

  “Indeed.” He gestured at the bed. “Perhaps you would want to share the bed with me? For old time’s sake?”

  I shook my head. “I’ll take the couch.”

  “Suit yourself.”

  I went into the bathroom, brushed my teeth and changed into the pajamas I’d brought with me. Well, not exactly pajamas. More like yoga pants and a T-shirt. Antoine went next and came out in a pair of boxers.

  We both settled into our respective beds. After about ten minutes, he said quietly, “Are you awake, Rebecca?”

  “Yeah.” I had a feeling I would be awake most of the night.

  “Do you ever miss . . . us?” he asked.

  I sat up. “Of course. There were a lot of good things about being married to you.”

  “Then why won’t you come back?” He rolled onto his side and propped himself on one elbow to look at me.

  “I think you probably know the answer to that by now.”

  He flopped onto his back. “I suppose I do.”

  * * *

  I was awake when my alarm went off. I wasn’t sure I’d managed to get any sleep. Between waiting to be attacked by a psycho stalker and my feet hanging over the end of the couch, it wasn’t exactly a restful scenario.

  I texted Dan: Please tell me you’ve spotted her.

  He answered: Sorry.

  I showered and dressed. Antoine was waking up as I left. “Watch your back,” I said as I went to the door.

  “You are the one whose back needs to be watched. Are you sure you don’t want me to come with you?” he asked.

  “Dan has pretty much the entire Sheriff’s Department ranged around watching me. I think I’ll be fine.”

  And I was. Nothing happened. Not in the back alley behind POPS where I parked my car. Not as I prepped for the morning rush. Not as I served coffee and breakfast bars to my much diminished crowd. I’d told Dario to stay home. I didn’t want to put anyone in danger who didn’t need to be in danger. Finally, at ten o’clock, my phone rang. It was Dan. “We’ve got her.”

  “Oh, thank goodness. Where? When? How?”

  He laughed. “Posing as a maid at the hotel. She bribed one of the maids into giving her a uniform and keys. She was sneaking into Antoine’s room. I have no idea what she intended to do once she was in and I don’t want to.”

  “Did she confess?” I sat down heavily in a chair.

  “No. At least not yet. We really haven’t had time to question her yet. It’ll come. I’m sure of it.”

  “What a relief.” That didn’t begin to sum it up, but it was all I had at the moment.

  “I know. Antoine can go back to California. Things can finally go back to normal.”

  Normal sounded very, very good at the moment.

  I opened the back door. “Free coffee and snacks to anyone who was trying to keep me from getting killed.”

  Huerta, Stephens and Vera converged from three separate spots and jogged toward the door. Annie appeared in her own doorway. “I would totally have thrown myself between you and a bullet.”

  “Sure you would have.” I waved for her to come in as well.

  * * *

  After my crew left, I sank down at the table in th
e kitchen myself. I called Garrett. “It’s over.”

  “I heard.” He sounded as relieved as I felt. “Dinner tonight?”

  “Yes, please. I’ll even let you bring in takeout. I’m so tired my eyelids feel like they have ten-pound weights on them.”

  I couldn’t stay sitting for long, though. The room was a mess: empty coffee cups and plates everywhere. Then there was prep for the afternoon rush. I had a feeling that having been part of the arrest of Marie Parsons wasn’t going to make me any less of a subject of conversation and speculation. I figured I’d better be ready for double crowds.

  I was exhausted, nearly stumbling I was so tired, but it still felt good to work in my kitchen. It just felt right to be mixing and measuring, testing and tasting, sipping and savoring as I made popcorn and fudge. I heard the tinkle of the bell signifying that someone had come in the front door. I grabbed an apron and headed to the front to meet my first afternoon customer.

  It was Lucy.

  “Lucy, what are you doing here? I thought you’d flown back to California.”

  “Just because a person goes to an airport, doesn’t mean they have to get on a plane.” Her tone was sarcastic.

  “I don’t understand.”

  She rolled her eyes. “What a surprise. Rebecca doesn’t get it. You are so freaking dim, girlfriend. You never get anything right.”

  I’d never heard Lucy speak in that tone of voice before. “What are you talking about?”

  “What are you talking about? What’s going on? Who did this? Who did that? Why? Why? Why?” she said in a whiney singsong voice. “I don’t know how anyone can stand to be around you. I really don’t know what Antoine sees in you.”

  I didn’t have an answer to that since I wasn’t entirely sure what he saw in me, either.

  “But he’s totally smitten with you,” she said. “Can’t stay away from you. Can’t stop talking about you. Can’t stop thinking about you. Of course, there are a lot of things I don’t understand about Antoine’s taste in women. I mean, can you believe he promoted Brooke over me? What was that about? And after all I did to get Melanie out of the way so I could step into her place.”