Changing Stiles

by Elaine Allen

  He drops the towel from his body and now, he’s naked too. “I binged on her for days and became forever sick,” he repeats. “Tell me what you need to make us work,” Carter pleads. His voice is strong and deep.

  The lighting in his bedroom makes me feel exposed like I’m beneath the spotlight. Exposed to him exactly the way he wants. I'd give any and everything to make us work but instead, I give him doubt.

  “We live in different states,” I lay down the biggest barrier. “And what if Mira doesn’t like me?”

  “It’s a two-and-a-half hour drive. We both own businesses, so our schedules are more flexible than most. And you’re fly as fuck, so Mira is going to love you if I do.”

  Solutions to obstacles one and two provided.

  He gives me the cocky look that reads, You tried it. Now… Next.

  “Trust, truth, respect, love and affection,” I decare, looking over at him. I smile despite my nakedness and need to be covered. “I want babies. I want to get married. I want good dick all the time. I need to be calmed down, talked off the ledge, and occasionally checked. I need someone who’s rational because I’m irrational. I wish I had the secret to time travel because there are two things I would change. I would have made amends with my father so when his time came, we would’ve had a lifetime of memories. And I would’ve shown up at your house and never have allowed Justin to come over to mine.” That’s just the beginning. “I want to be loved forever.”

  I rush to him but he holds me off. “And if I could give you all those things, would you take it or be afraid?”

  Ba-Bump… ba-bump… Ba-bump… “I would take it,” I chuckle. My heart is racing but it’s not fear; its love. “Carter, if you're offering, I will take it.”

  “Good,” he kisses my nose after he finally closes the distance between us. “Whatever happened in the past is the past. No old niggas for you; no new hoes for me. Agreed?”

  Slowly, I nod my head. “Agreed,” I lean up for a kiss to seal the deal.

  He doesn't give me one but grips my hips and pulls me closer to him. “Now, tell me you love me,” he orders in a husky whisper close to my ear. “I said it first last time.” His breath tickles my neck and sends inviting waves to my girl.

  “You said it first but I felt it first.”

  His lips form a quick frown. “Negative. I was gone over you the night we all went to that poetry slam, and you recited, I Wrote a Good Omelet. You was flirting extra heavy, but you weren’t ready. I definitely wanted to be all up in you, but I settled for loving you from afar.”

  The crazy thing about that, I remember that night and I was ready. I wasn't talking to Justin anymore, and all I wanted to do was have Carter make me feel like Nikki was feeling when she wrote that. It's the night I realized I was in love with him. “Just for the record, I was all the way into you. In love with you by then.”

  “You all the way into me now?” he murmurs, one of his hands traveling down my hip, the other sliding up and down my spine.

  Biting my lip, I nod in response. I'm restrained because I want him to be all the way in me right now. “All the way. I love you, Carter.”

  “Yeah, Princess” He kisses my earlobe, slaps my butt cheek. “You’re mine forever. What you say that day at your house? Kiss me like I'm all you'll ever know… Hold on tight… Never let me go… I need you to be mine for life…”

  I step back, somehow amazed at his ability to recall things I’ve only said in passing. “I just said I love you. I’m still waiting for you to say it back.”

  “You think I did all this ‘cause I like you? I love you, Alieas. I was about to be on some stalking shit to get your contact info from Ty or Dave. I had thought about emailing you or inboxing you on some nut stuff, but I was patient, and you came back to me. I hate that we wasted ten years.”

  Relieved, I laugh. “I hate that we wasted ten years.” I want to tell him about all the mornings I awakened, wishing that I was untangling myself from him. “Carter, I have never stopped loving you.”

  Carter pulls me into his arms and just embraces me. I lean into him and wind my arms around his waist, laying my head on his chest. He holds on to me for what seems like forever. After a couple moments, I glance up at him when his penis reminds me something that I’d forgotten.

  “You know we’re still naked, right?” I inquire, hoping to show Carter just how much love I have inside for him.

  His stomach rumbles as he laughs and lifts me from my feet. “About that,” Carter murmurs, wrapping my legs around his waist. Closing my eyes, I drop significantly lower, swallowing hard as he enters me. In a couple strides, we're by the bed, dropping our wanting and willing bodies onto it. My back to it, his body covering mine.

  Breathlessly, I move beneath him, needing every stroke like I need air. “I prayed for you to come back to me,” I moan, digging my fingers into his back. All but purring, I scream, “Aaah! Yessss! Yesssss!”

  “I love you, Alieas,” Carter rasps, his hands gripping my behind, holding me in place as he increases his pace.

  “I wished for a second chance,” I breathe, lifting my lips to his. His kisses me, devouring my mouth, capturing my cries of pleasure.

  “He listened, Babe. I promise to make all your dreams come true.”

  And just like that, I believed him.

  And just like that, my heart feels free.

  Epilogue

  Eight months have gone by in a flash. It’s like I blinked my eyes and time literally flew. I guess it does when you’re having fun. Standing at the breakfast counter, I lick strawberry shortcake ice cream from the back of a spoon.

  I could sing. I'm in heaven, enjoying the deliciousness of eating ice cream right from the carton at six a.m. and no one giving me sideways ass glances. I thought about making breakfast and got distracted by my fat ass cravings.

  Barefoot, I sway my hips to Queen Bey as she sings her heart out about being Drunk in Love with Jay-Z. I hold my spoon in the air as I sing along. My headphones lock in the sound of Beyoncé as I pretend to match her vocals.

  We woke up in the kitchen,

  Saying how the hell did this shit happen

  Oh baaaby.

  Drunk in loooove

  I dip the spoon back into the ice cream for a small scoop and just gush as I savor my love for Carter and ice cream as it melts in my mouth because I finally have everything I’ve ever wanted: me, Carter, and Bug in the same city, under one roof.

  It only took us a couple months to figure out that what we have is forever and that we didn’t want to live apart. He showed up at a radio interview I gave three months ago and got down on one knee and asked me to be his.

  Of course, I agreed. I moved back to Philly last month because it made more sense. I can write anywhere, and I could do everything I needed to do for J and S through email, Skype, and biweekly visits to D.C. The café/ bookstore will open soon. We decided a move for Carter's construction company would have been far more difficult and taken an infinite amount of planning; plus, he has Bug.

  And I’m—

  “Drunk in love, huh?” Carter slides up behind me, taking one of the buds out of my ears. I was so busy indulging in this strawberry shortcake that I didn’t even sense him come into the kitchen. “Ice cream and Beyoncé at six a.m.?” He leans closer to kiss my neck. I let out a helplessly in love giggle at the playful kiss and the feel of his hands covering my bulging belly.

  Yup, we’re pregnant.

  Five months and counting. “Your son wanted pancakes and then he changed his mind when I saw the ice cream. It was calling my name. I felt fat and helpless, and I was trying to avoid the judgmental side-eye you be giving me,” I tell him.

  We have eighteen more weeks to go before baby boy, Carter Reed II, will make his long-awaited appearance, and I— shit, I'm definitely in love with him already. I can’t wait to meet this baby who has been growing inside of me.

  “Babe, don’t nobody be giving you the side-eye. You’re carrying our future right there,�
� he declares.

  The force of love that Carter has within him for our son radiates into me through his words. It is fierce and unquestionable.

  Placing my hands over his, I nod in agreement.

  This love I have is fierce, and I never would have known it with him if it were it not for second chances.

  Every day, I think of my father and what he gave up with Tyree. They never had a chance and that breaks my heart. We can assign the blame directly to my father. He was a weak man. He couldn’t make the decision to come clean, man up, and be a father to Tyree.

  Even after the fact.

  Like, dude, it never crossed your mind to just tell the fuckin’ truth? As close as he and Tyree were, he couldn’t just give him that small piece of himself that Tyree had been searching for his entire life. It’s hard to be a witness to the fallout. My brother— my Tyree— is the best man I know, aside from Carter, that is. And now, he is a little broken and none of us know how to fix that for him. Not even Bri, who has been his rock forever, can right this. She feels helpless.

  And I’m a little bit ashamed. ‘Cause while the outraged woman in me was shouting, I wish he had manned up. I'm torn because in all actuality, had he confessed to my mother, it's possible that I wouldn't even have been born.

  So, yeah. Riddle me that.

  The complexity of this entire situation drives me crazy, and it’s only the love that I have inside for my growing baby and my family that helps keep me sane.

  It took me a couple months to read my father’s letter, and I had to agree with Tyree; it was dramatic as hell. All he wanted to do was basically apologize for being a liar and a cheater and for failing the ones he claimed to love the most.

  He did tell me one thing that rings true.

  Hold on to love with both hands and never let go.

  Even if Darrien Stiles had never done it with a commitment to any familial, agape, or eros type of love, his ass was correct in that one statement.

  Turning around, I lift my face so I can gaze into Carter’s eyes. Embracing him, I make my favorite confession, “I love you, Carter,” the testament of our love resting comfortably between us.

  “Love you too, babe.”

  Turning my lips up to his for a kiss, I am overjoyed when he obliges, and I fall farther in love, wrapping my arms a little bit tighter ‘cause there is no way in hell I’m ever letting this go.

  “Really, y’all? Get a room,” Mira cuts in on us.

  “I think she just wants some love too,” Carter teases.

  She doesn’t deny it and comes over to rub my stomach.

  Smiling, I close my eyes and just think, “Here’s to second chances that lead to happy endings.”

  THE End

  Bookclub Questions

  Overall thoughts.

  Thoughts on characters.

  Is honesty always the best policy?

  Do you think Alieas was wrong?

  Should Carter have allowed Alieas to explain?

  Bookclub Questions Cont’d

  If you walked in on your significant other in the same compromising situation, what is your initial response?

  When dating several people, how do you handle cutting the loose threads once you want to become exclusive?

  Do you believe in platonic friends with the opposite sex with people you have dated?

  Do you believe in second chances at love?

  What was your worst date ever?

  Additional Notes

  Other books available by

  Elaine L. Allen

  No Ordinary Love

  Hurricane

  E-book and Paperback

  Coming Soon…

  Check out the fallout in

  Briannah and Tyree’s story:

  Love is

  I am overly excited that you chose to witness Alieas’ and Cater’s second chance.

  I Hope you enjoyed it.

  XOXO

  Elaine…

  Elaine L. Allen is currently working on her next project.

  She resides in Philadelphia with her family.

  You can reach her through social media

  www.perfectperceptions.wixsite.com/elainelallen

  perfectperceptionspublishing@gmail.com

  FB: Elaine Allen

  Twitter and Wattpad: @MsSheWrites

  IG: MsSheWrites/ or Ms_imgonnabweighless

  CHANGING

  Stiles