by Sue Julsen
Hearing Frank’s name pushed me over the edge, and my body started shaking and jerking and I couldn’t stop it. ‘Hey! Someone help me! I can’t stop this! Hey, you guys! Anyone there? Please stop this shaking!’
“Doctor!” Daddy screamed. “Doctor! Something’s wrong!”
The doctor and his wife came running into the room.
“Has she ever had seizures before?” the doctor asked.
“No, never! What’s wrong with her, Doc?”
“I don’t know. Her temperature is down a bit, but we still have a ways to go. How many days did you say she’d been sick?”
“Three or four, before I called you. Then it took close to a week to get here. Nine, maybe ten days?”
“You should’ve taken her to a hospital immediately, man!”
“I couldn’t do that, Doc. That’s why I called you. For a few hundred bucks you keep quiet.”
“If you’re running from the cops I don’t care, but if you kidnapped this child from her parents and she isn’t yours…” The doctor stood with his hands on his hips, waiting for an answer to his unfinished sentence.
“No, of course I didn’t kidnap her! She is my daughter! Her mother died in a fire several years ago. We’re heading to Michigan to stay with my sister.” Daddy snapped. “Now, I have your hush money, Doc. Are you gonna help her or not?”
‘Michigan? You just told me California. What are you up to, Daddy? You can tell me. I won’t tell. I’m good at keeping secrets.’
“Yes,” replied the doctor. “I’m going to help her—if I can. If it’s not too late. What did you say your name is? And hers?”
“Damn it! I’m Eddie and she’s Suzy, my daughter! She’s six years old!”
“Okay, Eddie. Calm down. Why don’t you wait in the parlor while I examine her? Let’s see if we can get this fever down to normal.”
“I’m not leaving her! You hear me, Doc? I’m not leaving my daughter!”
“Just wait in the parlor. If there’s any change I’ll come get you.”
“Come on, Eddie, don’t worry. She’s in good hands.” The doctor’s wife led him out of the room.
Daddy, deep in thought, paced the floor for hours. Then, sat for hours. He knew he’d have to keep on his toes with the doctor, and he hoped I wouldn’t say anything in my fevered state.
Under his breath, he mumbled, “Doc’s a smart old cuss and if I slip up just once…well, I can’t let that happen. We’ll have to stay on the run in case he calls the fuzz. I planned too long to have this messed up now. I can’t let them find us! I’ll have to make a few detours on way to California…maybe, I shouldn’t leave any witnesses we were ever here…
“Oh, come on Eli! Are you totally losing it, man? He’s a well-known doctor! You can’t just kill the bastard! No, I’ll have to trust money will keep this old fart and his wife quiet,” he concluded.
“Martha, I don’t know what this man’s done, but I don’t trust him.”
“I don’t trust him either, Matt. Did you see the marks on that child? Her body’s covered with bruises. New and old. This child’s been abused.”
“I know, Martha. I saw those earlier, but that’s the least of our concerns right now. Her fever’s down to a hundred, but it’s been too high for so long. She may have brain damage.”
“Oh, God, I hope not. She’s already been through hell. You can tell that by looking at her little body. I’ll pray for her, and for that man, in case he really is her father…and in case he’s innocent of the way this child’s been treated.”
“He said his wife died in a fire. If that’s true, maybe he’s running with the child to protect her from someone. For now, Martha, we need to give him the benefit of doubt.”
“I agree, Matt. You get some rest. I’ll sit with the child.”
“Thank you, my dear. If there’s any change, come get me.”
“Of course. Now, go.”
‘Soothing voice, can you hear me? I feel better now. I’m not as hot. Can you hear me? Where’s my Daddy? Oh, why can’t you hear me?’
Martha sat next to me, softly humming, and rubbing my forehead with a damp cloth. She prayed for my recovery, but I knew she just wasted her time. God doesn’t listen.
“Excuse me, ma’am?”
“Yes, Eddie.”
“I haven’t seen the doctor in hours. Has there been any change?”
“Her fever’s broken, but she’s still unconscious. We can’t do anymore until she’s awake. You should try to sleep. It may be a while before she wakes up.”
“Thank you. I’ll try.” Daddy stood next to me and looked at my frail, limp body, then went back to the parlor.
Days passed before I awakened. My fever was gone and the pain in my stomach had subsided, but my body still ached all over. Sitting up, I looked around the room. A white-haired woman slept in a chair across from me. She had a book on her lap and her head bobbed back and forth. I felt I should lie down and not wake her…
“Well, little one, you’re awake.” The doctor came to the side of the table, smiling.
“Yes, sir. I just woke up.”
“I’m Doctor Brandon. Sleeping beauty there”—he pointed to the woman in the chair—“is my wife, Martha. She’s been with you day and night since you were brought in here.”
“Yes, sir. I heard her humming and telling me everything would be all right.”
“That’s my Martha.” He smiled. “So, how do you feel?”
“Better. I tried telling you what happened, but no one could hear me.” I looked into the slightly wrinkled face of the kind doctor.
“What do you mean, child?”
“When I got here. I was talking, but you couldn’t hear me. I wanted to tell you what happened to make me sick.”
“Well, I can hear you now, so you go on and tell me what happened.”
“Greg, that’s Uncle Frank’s son. He gave me a seed from the yard, and the shell had little holes all over it. He made me eat it and that’s when I got sick.”
“I see. And, what else did Greg make you do?”
Dr. Brandon was old, with silvery-grey hair, hazel eyes and a friendly smile. It would be easy to talk to him, but I knew I had to be careful. Daddy had warned me about old people who would pump kids for information they had no business knowing.
“Nothing, sir.”
“Did anyone else make you do something you didn’t want to do?”
“Where’s my Daddy?”
“I’m right here, baby. You had daddy so scared. I thought I was gonna lose you.”
“I’m sorry, Daddy. I feel better now.”
“Well, hello there, little one. I’m Martha. Do you think you can eat something?”
“Maybe.” I smiled.
“Well, I just happen to have some chicken soup on the stove. I’ll be right back with a bowl.”
Doctor Brandon said he’d be back in a few minutes too, then he followed his wife out of the room. Daddy waited until they were out of hearing range, then whispered, “Sarah, be careful, don’t tell these people anything about us. You’re Suzy and I’m Eddie.”
“I know Daddy. I heard you tell them. I couldn’t open my eyes and no one could hear me, but I heard everything you said.”
“We need to get outta here, Sarah. Do you think you can walk?”
“I don’t know. I can try, if you help me.”
Daddy swung my legs over the side of the table and put his arm around my waist to help me stand. My legs felt wobbly, and when I tried to take a step I would’ve fallen had he not caught me.
“What are you doing!? This child’s far too weak to be out of bed!” Dr. Brandon exclaimed, coming back into the room.
“Sorry, Doc, but we need to get going. How much do I owe you?”
“I’m serious, Eddie, or whatever your name is! We need to get nourishment into her and I need to monitor her for a few days…”
“Like I said, Doc. We need to get going. I’ll get her food and I’ll make sure she gets plenty of rest.
So, how much?”
“Three hundred. My wife’s bringing the soup in just a minute. Won’t you wait until the child’s had a chance to eat something?” he pleaded.
Daddy laid the money on the table. “Tell her thanks. And thank you, Doc.”
“Thank you, Dr. Brandon,” I said. “Please tell Martha bye for me.”
“I will child. I will. Goodbye.”
Daddy opened the car door for me, then looked back at the doctor’s office. He didn’t feel good leaving witnesses, but he didn’t think killing them would be wise either. Besides, he didn’t know if they’d already told someone.
He could only hope the money would keep the doctor quiet, but if the cops were called, he figured we’d be in California before anyone could catch us. Smiling, Daddy helped me into the back seat and covered me with my blanket.
“How does that feel, sweetie?”
“Fine, Daddy, but I wish we could’ve stayed for the soup. I’m really hungry now.”
“I’ll get you some soup very soon, I promise. We just had to get outta there, Sarah. That old man was getting suspicious.”
“I wouldn’t have told him anything. Honest!”
“I know you wouldn’t on purpose, Sarah. But guys like that can get you sayin’ things before you realize it. Lie down and rest, and when you wake up we’ll get you that soup.”
I pulled my blanket up around my neck, and it wasn’t long before I was dreaming of happier times with Mama running through a field of blue flowers, and Daddy sitting on a blanket waiting for us…. Fried chicken, potato salad, cookies, and lemonade were spread out. Everyone was laughing…Hey kid, down on your knees…
“No! Leave me alone! Leave me alone!” I screamed.
“Sarah, wake up! Sarah!” He shook me fiercely. “Wake up, baby. It’s daddy.”
“Oh, Daddy, it was terrible!” I sat up, shaking and crying.
“You had a nightmare, baby. You’re okay. It’s just you and me. We just pulled into the restaurant parking lot. You still want that soup, don’t you?”
“I guess so.” I wiped my tears.
“Well, come on. I’m starving and like the doctor said, you need nourishment.” He helped me out of the car, then held on to me as we walked across the parking lot. We stepped inside the door of the restaurant and a very pretty lady greeted us.
“Hello. My name’s Bobbi. I’ll be your server tonight.” She smiled and led us to a corner booth near the back.
“Well, hello, Bobbi. A beautiful name for a beautiful lady.” Daddy looked up at her and flashed his most alluring smile.
“Thank you, sir.” She smiled. “What can I get you two?”
“Do you have chicken soup?”
“Yes, sir. It’s homemade, and very good.”
“Is that what you want, Suzy?”
“Yes, Daddy.”
“A bowl of chicken soup for her, and give me ham and eggs, over easy, rye toast, and coffee.”
“Do you want something to drink, sweetheart?”
“No, thank you.”
“Oh, she’s so polite for a little thing.” Bobbi smiled. “I’ll be right back with your coffee, sir.”
“Well, Sarah, what do you think of her?”
“She’s nice, and pretty, too.”
“Well then, you stay here and let me get to work.” He grinned, and went up to the counter.
Once he started talking to Bobbi, she smiled and laughed a lot, and she kept looking over at me. His magic was working! It wasn’t long before she disappeared, and returned within moments with keys in her hand.
Daddy came back to the table, smiling. “We’re in, baby. Didn’t take me long with this one. She doesn’t live far and we can stay as long as we want.”
“Good! I like her.”
“Yeah, me too.”
“Okay, soup for Suzy, and ham and eggs for you, Eddie.” Bobbi smiled at me and winked. “Eat up. I get off work in twenty minutes.”
“We’ll be ready when you are, gorgeous.” Daddy squeezed her hand.
The soup tasted really good and I was very hungry. I still felt a little weak, but after a good night’s sleep and more food, I figured I’d be just fine! I’d just finished my soup when Bobbi slid into the seat next to Daddy.
“You guys ready?” She smiled at Daddy, then at me.
“I am. How ‘bout you Suzy? You ready to go to Bobbi’s house?”
Grabbing the napkin, I wiped my mouth. “I’m ready!”
Bobbi lived four blocks away, and she’d walked to work for exercise. She told us her husband had died, left her everything, and they never had any kids.
“I always wanted children, but it didn’t happen for us. Turn right at the next street. George was a good man. A good provider. He was killed on his way home two years ago by a drunk driver. I haven’t been with a man since. Okay, slow down. It’s the white house with the blue trim on your left.”
“This one?” Daddy asked, pulling into the driveway.
“Yep. It’s too large just for me. I do hope you like it here, Eddie, and you too, Suzy.” She looked back at me and smiled.
“I’m sure we will, Bobbi.” Daddy smiled at her, then he too looked back at me, and smiled.
“Well, come on in. I’ll show you around in the morning, but for now, Suzy, let me show you to your room.” She took me up the stairs and to the end of the hall. At the last door she stopped and opened the door. “This would’ve been my little girl’s room.”
“Wow!” I exclaimed walking into the large room. “It’s beautiful! Is it all for me?”
“It sure is, honey. And, you have your own bathroom, too.”
“Wow! I never had my own room, or my own bathroom before!”
“Well, you do now. Make yourself at home, and I’ll see you in the morning. Goodnight, honey.”
“Night, Bobbi.” She closed the door, and I looked around the room, then whispered, “I can’t believe this!” I looked at the big bed with a pink canopy covered in white lace, a matching bedspread, and a toy box full of toys!
“This is the most beautiful room I’ve ever seen! I’m gonna like it here! I hope we stay forever and ever!”
When I finally came down from the clouds, I laid my nightgown across the bed, then quickly decided to deal with the few other clothes Ellie had scrounged for me in the morning. I went to check out the bathroom.
Finding a bottle of bubble bath on a stand next to the tub, I filled the tub with warm water and added lots of bubbles that smelled like vanilla. Climbing in, I lay back until my head slipped underneath the water, and held my breath as long as possible.
For the first time in a very long time I felt really happy, and very glad Bobbi didn’t have kids.
“Or a fuckin’ man to make us do things, or hurt us!” Jean voiced with spite.
For once I felt completely safe—in my own room!
I stayed in the tub until my fingers and toes were wrinkled and all the bubbles were gone. After using one of the matching pink and white towels, I crawled into the big, soft bed, and slept better than I’d slept in years.
I awoke to the smell of bacon, and the sound of laughter, coming from downstairs. Jumping up, I dressed quickly and ran down the stairs. I was so hungry, and the smells that came from the kitchen were wonderful.
That’s where I found Bobbi, cooking breakfast, and Daddy sitting at the table with a cup of coffee. They both were smiling!
“Good morning, sweetheart. Did you sleep well?” Bobbi asked.
“Oh, yes! The bed and the room are wonderful! Before I went to bed I took a nice, long bubble bath. I liked the smell, too!”
“Oh, I’m so glad. I always kept that room set up for a sweet little girl just like you.” She smiled. “Are you hungry?”
“Starving!”
“Well, sit right down here and it’ll be ready in a minute.”
As I watched her in the kitchen, it reminded me of Mama. I felt sad thinking about her, but still, I ate like I hadn’t eaten in months. Bobbi was a
great cook!
After breakfast she showed me every room in her house, and she even had a color TV that I could watch whenever I wanted! Bobbi showed me her room last. It was so beautiful decorated in different shades of purples. She had her own bathroom, too!
Then we went to my room and she helped me make my bed and put away my things.
“Are these all the clothes you have, sweetie?”
I nodded. “I don’t need much.”
“Well, this just won’t do. I’m off work tomorrow, so we’re gonna go shopping and get you all new clothes. Would you like that?”
My eyes lit up at the thought of new clothes; not something that had been tossed in the trash or in the corner of a garage to be donated to charity. Even the few things Ellie had given me were used.
“I’d like that, but I’ll have to ask Daddy.”
“Don’t you worry about Eddie. I’ll handle him. I might even get him new clothes, too—if he’s a good boy.” She winked, then tossed her head back, laughing.
Her beautiful blue eyes glistened like the sky on a clear day when she laughed, and her silky blond hair that came down to the middle of her back swayed like corn silk in the wind when she moved her head. I sat mesmerized for several moments looking at her beauty.
“I used to have long hair, Bobbi. It was down to my butt.”
“Why in the world would someone cut it? You have beautiful hair.”
“Daddy said I got gum in it, so he had to cut it.”
“Oh! Well, one good thing, it’ll grow back. Just be careful chewing gum next time.”
“I will. Can I ask you something, Bobbi?”
“Sure, sweetie. You can ask me anything.”
“Do you like my daddy?”
“Very much. And, I like you, too, very, very much.” She gave me a big hug, and smiled. “I want you to feel at home, Suzy, so don’t be shy. If there’s anything you need, anything at all, just ask. Okay?”
Not knowing what to say, I nodded.
“Good! Now, I have to get ready for work, but I’ll see you tonight.”
After Bobbi left my room, the smell of flowers from her hair lingered, and I thought: so this must be what a real family should be like—what happy and safe—should feel like.
I knew I felt good! And for once, I didn’t pray for death. I prayed we’d live with Bobbi forever. Happy and safe—forever and ever. “Please God, please let me be happy.”
