“Did you now? I’m impressed you figured it out.”
Aria, by all means, continue your misdirected research.
“I studied about it in books and on the Internet. It was pretty interesting. Most likely, a trauma from your childhood days gave rise to split personalities, and the stress from combat caused your other self to manifest.”
“I see.”
“That’s what happed when your bike and the plane were hijacked, didn't it.”
“Yup.”
“Therefore, the first stage in your training will be to constantly subject you to the stress of combat,” said Aria, suddenly drawing the short katana she even had hidden in back of her cheerleader uniform.
“W-Whoa! Wait a sec!”
“What? I’ll use my pistols afterwards. Don’t worry.”
“That’s not it! If you start waving those things at me, I’m gonna wind up scattered all over this field!”
“Why don’t you try using that teaspoons amount of brains in that head of yours and think a little bit. There’s a rhythm to everything, right?” said Aria in a tone mixed with a sigh that I found particularly irksome. “The purpose of this training is to create a rhythm in which we awaken your powers by subjecting you to stress when you’re in ‘stupid Kinji mode’ and have you counterattack after those powers are awakened.”
“Counterattack ...?”
“You still don't get it? I guess it can’t be helped. I’ll break it down for you, so go ahead and cry tears of relief and joy, but clean the wax out of your ears so you can hear me.”
I think it would be kind of dangerous to cry joyfully while cleaning out one’s ears.
“Number one. You’re standing here in ‘stupid Kinji mode’ right now. Number two. Your powers awake during combat. Number three. You then counterattack. This is the ideal rhythm I’ve come up with.”
That’s it? For a person acting like she’s doing me a favor that sure is a ridiculously simple plan. If this girl is supposed to be the great-granddaughter of the world famous Sherlock Holmes the Fourth, for the sake of their country’s honor, I think the British government should consider having a DNA test done. Seriously.
“So the skill you need to learn is a counterattack technique.”
“Counterattack technique ... What is that?”
“First, you’re going to stop a sword by catching it with your bare hands,” said Aria, raising her katana.
“Wa-”
Before I could say “wait,” I heard the sound of the air being slashed at right next to my right ear. Aria had just swung her sword down towards my shoulder at a speed faster than the eye could follow. I couldn't see it, but she did stop one millimeter away from shoulder though. Riding along the wind created by Aria’s movements was that faint smell of gardenias.
“Okay. Go over that timing in your head five hundred times. You have ten minutes.”
“Go over the timing ...?”
“That’s right. Imagine yourself catching the katana based on the speed at which it just came at you. If you like, you can actually use your hands as if you were shadow boxing.”
Aria returned the katana to its scabbard on her back in one fluid motion.
“In other words … you just want me to do image training.”
“We can start mass producing lumps on your head right now if you want.”
“Alright, alright, I’ll do it.”
After breathing a very deep sigh, I reluctantly began imagining myself catching Aria’s katana. Aria nodded in satisfaction.
“That’s the way. You’re very commendable when you follow instructions. Good boy. I hear there’s a master swordsman among the IU members who made my mom a scapegoat. Techniques for countering knife attacks are the basics for any butei. Don’t slack off now,” said Aria in a condescending tone and with a smile on her face.
Get treated like a kid by her and it’s all over.
“Get to it. I’m gonna start counting now. Nine minutes and fifty-nine seconds. Fifty-eight seconds.”
“I’m doing it, I’m doing it.”
“No useless chatter. As a penalty, you just lost thirty seconds!”
What’s up with that “Aria rule”? She’s as tyrannical as a despot. Well . . . I guess I’ll stick it out with her though.
I let out a short sigh. All this talk about the key to my hysteria mode aside, I had already made up my mind about what I’m going to do after that last incident we went through. I’m not going to become some ally of justice. But ... I will continue to be her ally for a little while longer.
I’ll help Aria out with what she’s trying to do.
But the one thing I wanted to keep telling myself was that it wasn’t because she was cute, or I had fallen in love with her or anything like that. It was simply a matter of me seeing through to the end what I had already decided. I was only doing what I should be doing. As for the other things I had decided on—transferring from Butei High to a regular school next year, becoming a normal person who leads a normal life—I didn’t intend to change those plans, either.
These were the thoughts swimming through my head as I engaged in image training when Aria pull out her iPod from underneath her skirt and starting fiddling with it. Looking out of the corner of my eye, I saw there was a video being played on the small screen, which also served as a touch panel. It was a video demonstration of the choreography used in Ar-kata. As per Aria’s suggestion, I signed up to join the band, and the Adsiard preparatory committee sent me the same video this morning.
“Hmm ... This might be kind of cute,” Aria said to herself. Then, slightly distancing herself from me, she turned away and ... suddenly started dancing. She wasn’t doing too bad of a job, either.
Well I’ll be. She’s pretty good.
Having no interest in cheerleading, I’m not too knowledgeable on the subject. But even to my untrained eye, Aria’s movements as she began to dance and her twin pigtails flailed about, looked like those of an expert cheerleader. Her movements started out as the normal kind of cheerleading most are used to seeing, and from there, it took on a more gallant atmosphere as she incorporated the martial arts formations. Even so, when adorable, little Aria did all of this in that cheerleader uniform ... it was still very cutesy. Switching from a knife to her pistol, Aria continued to dance, and lifting her leg high into the air, she even performed a back walkover. According to Aria, boy shorts aren’t underwear so there’s nothing to be embarrassed about. But regardless of her choice in undergarments, I had to admit that she was good. Aria picked up her pom-poms and even had the nerve to show off one of those starry smiles. Normally, she was always in a bad temper and practically scowling, so even though Aria was only acting, the effects of these types of smiles were twice as potent. What kind of effects those were, I didn’t know. But despite all of that, seeing Aria practice her cheer routine like this ... really did make her come across as just an average girl. If this had been a regular high school, no one would assume her to be anything but—just a tad short, self-centered, energetic high-school girl that could be found anywhere.
“Hey ... Kinji.” Aria suddenly stopped dancing and her pink ponytails twirled as she spun around. “Have you been staring at me this whole time? Those are the eyes of a lecher.”
Aria placed her pom-poms against her hips. She then noticed her skirt had inched itself up slightly and used the pom-poms to straighten it out.”
“This isn't a show, you know?”
Though a bit late, I think she must have started to feel embarrassed because her puffed up cheeks had taken a red hue.
“I’d say cheerleading is a show—essentially. More to the point, staring at you is the last thing I’d want to do.”
To be sure, I had been fixated on Aria for too long, and feeling a bit awkward, I averted my gaze.
“Why were you watching me then?”
“That’s ... that’s ... nothing you need to be concerned about.”
“... I’m not concerned. It’s just ...”
“...”
Ah. This vibe ...
“Anyways, are you doing your image training like you’re supposed to be? In five minutes, we’re gonna start practicing using the back of the sword.”
“The back of the sword?”
Even if you use the back, it’s gonna hurt like hell. In short, you’re going to be beating me with a metal rod.
“I’ll go slow at first so stop looking so afraid. But I will gradually pick up speed,” said Aria, putting on a truly sinister smile.
“Ow ...”
School had just finished, and I was still rubbing the sensitive lump on my head as I left the Inquesta building.
Dammit. That Aria is a sadistic. She might have been using the back of her sword, but she pummeled me with the thing. I feel like I may have forgotten some English vocabulary or historical dates.
“Kiiinji.”
Aria was running towards me with the sunset at her back. It seems she was lying in wait in front of the Inquesta building again.
“I’ll say this right now; I’m not doing any training after school. I’ve got homework to do for my regular classes.”
“I haven’t said anything yet.”
“And I’m not going back to Assault. If you’re telling me to return to that group of death wishers, our partnership is over. I’m going to be living peacefully as a member of Inquesta until I transfer out of here next year.”
“I still haven’t said a word.”
Aria acted completely unconcerned with my harsh tone and began walking towards the bus stop. Then she turned around with a smile as magnificent as a sunflower and said, “But we will continue training tomorrow.”
... Well, I guess I can do that much. I am her partner.
Besides, this was one those gags where after giving me a false impression twice, the third statement ends with something about “opening a hole in me.”
“Hey, Kinji. At Assault today, we practiced techniques for countering the knives that an enemy throws at you.”
Aria continued to ramble on happily about dangerous things I didn’t care to hear for. She seemed to be in a fairly good mood recently. The reason was obvious. It was probably because I was acting like her partner more or less. Just like the great detective Sherlock Holmes had John H. Watson, the members of Aria’s family—the Holmeses—required a partner that would allow them to display their abilities to the fullest. Aria, who used to be all by herself and an “aria” in every sense of the word, had been running around looking for that partner. She had literally been searching all over the world. And she finally found one at Tokyo Butei High—me in hysteria mode. I wasn’t able to tap into that power at will, but even so, I was the partner who could be a match for a prodigy like Aria.
“Say, Kinji.”
“What?”
“Hehe. Never mind.”
“God, you’re a pain.”
I get really annoyed by how when we’re walking, Aria occasionally turns around to make sure that I’m there, and then, sending the skirt of her sailor uniform whirling around, she continues on her merry way.
“Aria, you’re not going to look for any other partners aside from me? Wouldn’t it be a good idea to include two or three more people and form a bigger party?
I’d love to have them be the ones to babysit this kid.
“We don’t need any teammates. I don’t work well in groups.”
I’m aware.
“I can fight on my own anyway. I just have to have a partner who can keep up with me. Once your training is complete, there won’t be anything to worry about. You’re the only one I need.”
Ah, crap. That means I gotta be the one to look out for her?
Just contemplating that fact was giving me a headache, and I said as much.
“... My head’s starting to hurt. It’s all because you beat me to a pulp.”
“So take some Aspirin.”
“The only thing I take for headaches or colds is Yamato Pharmaceutical’s ‘Extra Concentrated Kudzu Infusion.’”
“Extra Concentrated ...? What’s that?”
“It means a high concentration of ingredients used in herbal medicine. It’s made up of various Chinese medicines like kudzu and ephedra.”
“You sound like an old geezer. Go and take that then. I’ll be putting more lumps on your head tomorrow.”
“I just happen to be out at the moment ... And they only sell it at Ameyoko. It’s a real hassle going all the way out there. I get it at a drug store between Ueno and Okachi-machi, and there aren’t any train stations nearby.”
“Kinji.” Aria, who didn’t seem to have been listening to my grumbling, suddenly stopped in front of the educational affairs department. “Look at this.”
“... What?” I asked, looking at the bulletin board to which Aria pointed.
“Attention, Second Year Class B Shirayuki Hotogi of SSR. Come to the educational affairs department.”
Shirayuki had been called to the educational affairs department. That was something you didn’t see every day. She was an honor student with a student deviation value of seventy-five, the student body president, president of the horticulture club and handicraft club, captain of the girls’ volleyball team. Aside from the bizarre incident with Aria a few days ago, she led the life of a model student. I never would have thought Shirayuki would be called to the educational affairs department. “Aria, did you make a complain about Shirayuki assaulting you the other day?”
“I’m a noblewoman,” said Aria, glaring at me with her red eyes, “I wouldn’t do something as cowardly as snitch to a teacher about private matters—even if someone did pick a fight with me. What do you take me for?”
Well, well. That’s very admirable for someone like Aria.
I was a little impressed. Aria placed a small finger on her lips and started musing to herself..
“Kinji, this is the perfect chance to keep that savage girl away from you,” said Aria, taking her own savageness up a few notches and looking up at me intently from beneath my chin.
“We’re going to investigate this matter and find out what her weakness is.”
Didn’t you just say something about noblewomen not being cowardly?
“Her weakness ...? Why? Shirayuki hasn’t come near us since then.”
“Yes, she has!”
Huh?
“Lately, whenever I’m alone, I can feel the presence of someone behind doors. It feels like someone is watching me from the shadows. Telephone lines have been cut apart as if they were bugged.”
...
“Water is dumped on me when I walk through the hallways on school grounds. Blow darts come flying at me out of nowhere. I tumble into pitfalls!”
…. Whoa. Wait a second ...
“I also received letters with the word “home wrecker” written on them. Anyways, that girl is constantly harassing me! How blind can you be to not have noticed?! You’re so incompetent!”
“So that’s what was going on ...”
“And that’s not the end of it.”
It's not?
“When I opened my locker in the girl’s locker room the other day, there was piano wire strung across inside! She knows that because of ... certain physical limitations, I have to go deep inside my locker to get my clothes, and she set the wire up so it would be level with my neck!”
Now that … I can’t laugh at.
So basically, as soon as Aria dove into her locker, she would have lost her head. The only people who learned how to set up brutal traps like that were seniors in the Assult division or those in the Lezzad (intelligence) division.
“Kinji, the time Shirayuki is supposed to report to the educational affairs department is posted here. Let’s ...” I was knitting my brows when Aria, seething with anger, gave me the most terrifying order out of all those she’d given me since I first met her. “... sneak into the educational affairs department while she’s there.”
There were dangers lurking in every single inch of Butei
High, but among them were particularly hazardous areas known as “the three great danger zones.” These would be Assault, Junction (underground warehouse), and the educational affairs department. Why is the educational affairs department (a simple, staff room for teachers) such a dangerous place? The answer is simple. Every single teacher at Butei High is a dangerous person. What do you expect? Teachers at a school this abnormal are guaranteed to be abnormal themselves. To put things into perspective, as far as I know, they were all previously soldiers in the special operation forces for various countries, mercenaries, mafia members ... There are even rumors that some of them were hit men. The list goes on. They’re a band of people with career histories I wish I had never known. Of course, there are some respectable teachers at the Inquesta and Connect (communications) division, but they’re such a minority that it’s really quite sad.
“Kinji, my hands won’t reach. Lift me up,” whispered Lady Aria as she and her slave (me) were infiltrating the lion’s den, a.k.a. the educational affairs department.
“Alright, alright.”
If I had refused go along with her plan, Aria would have given me a thrashing before opening a hole in me. If that were the case, it would be better to have a teacher kill me instead. They would probably make it quick. That sad logic is what propelled me to go along with Aria’s plan of sneaking into the educational affairs department. As I tried to keep my conscience distracted, I helped Aria reach the air duct attached to the ceiling of a hallway. If I had lifted Aria up in my arms, she would have just made comments about me molesting her again, so I put both of my hands on her sides and lifted her up like a little child.
“Ooh, look how tall you are,” I said under my breath, not really caring about the consequences.
“Gonna open a hole!” Aria responded as her knee, covered in black knee socks, dug itself ten inches into the pit of my stomach.
“Ngh!”
Paying no attention to my agony, Aria did a pull-up and climbed into the ceiling. Just when I thought the section of Aria’s legs between her skirt and her knee socks, or what Muto referred to as “absolute territory, flashed by my eyes, her foot used my head as a steppingstone and she crawled all the way inside. Taking Aria’s hand, I climbed up as well, and we noisily crept our way forward. With my master’s pigtails dragging along and her skirt right in front of my face, I became aware of the slight risk of going into hysteria mode, but luckily it was dark inside of the air duct. I couldn't even see the “absolute territory,” let alone the skirt. After proceeding a bit farther, I noticed Aria was crawling awfully fast. I was barely able to keep up with her as she turned the corner.
Aria the Scarlet Ammo (novel), Volume 2 Page 3
