‘This!’ Giselle exclaimed from the depths of my wardrobe, ‘Now this is perfect!’ I studied the midnight blue boat neck dress with its full circle skirt. It was pretty but classic. Elegant but not dramatic.
‘I think you might be right.’
A mumbled ‘Hallelujah!’ drifted over from Xander’s direction.
***
Cal had wanted to pick me up but I’d decided it might feel like less of a date if I just met him at the pub. I wasn’t actually sure if this was a date and had sort of forgotten to ask. Hence the hoo-ha with the wardrobe choices. He’d booked a table for us in the restaurant adjoining the pub for half seven and I was now stood there ten minutes early trying to ignore the interested glances I could feel being thrown my way.
Maybe dinner out of town would have been better. I’d dealt with this, and a whole lot more, but Cal was still relatively new here and from what I heard, he wasn’t big on dinners for two with anyone other than George. This was fresh fodder for the gossip machine and I worried how Cal might feel about that.
Straightening my back, and smoothing down my dress, I walked to the bar. I’d done the same thing plenty of times before over the years but rarely in a dress. It felt different. I felt different. The dress was beautiful and I really did love it but I’d spent most of my life either in jeans or overalls and it was what I was used to. When I put my team overalls or shirt on, I knew what I was doing. Who I was. This was a whole new experience and I was way out of my comfort zone.
But there was a part of me that felt excited by that. By all of this. I was still doing my best not to totally fall for Cal Martin but when he looked at me and the rest of the world went into soft focus, it felt right. Even if it was wrong. And OK, so that feeling never lasted long. I was, after all, much better at reality than fantasy. But a little bit now and then couldn’t hurt, could it? And putting this dress on tonight, saying yes to dinner, even as friends, it gave me that feeling again.
I’d actually loved putting on this dress and may even have done a twirl or two in the privacy of my own room. Afterwards, I’d popped into the house to see Mum to check I looked OK and she’d burst into tears. Not helpful to my whirling, contradictory thoughts but kind of lovely.
‘Wow!’
I hadn’t seen Cal when I’d arrived and so had ordered an orange juice while I waited. I looked up as he now stood beside me, an expression of appreciation on his face.
‘You look amazing.’ He bent and placed the lightest of kisses on my cheek as a small smile began to tug at one corner of his mouth. ‘I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in a dress before.’
‘It’s not really my thing.’ My hands went to smooth the skirt again, unnecessarily.
Cal caught my hand, stopping the nervous motion. ‘It really should be. You look stunning!’
I fiddled with my bag for a moment, keeping my eyes lowered. However much I wanted to be like Giselle and laugh prettily, accepting the compliment with the grace it deserved, I had no idea how to do that.
‘It really is cute when you blush.’ Cal’s voice was low and close to me.
I twiddled the chain of my bag. ‘It’d be easier on both of us if you’d stop saying things like that.’
‘I know.’
Even without looking I could hear the teasing smile in his voice.
‘OK. I apologise for making you blush but I don’t apologise for the compliment. Expect more.’
I risked a glance up to find him smiling down at me, warmth – and possibly something else I wasn’t going to even think about right now – dancing in those storm-grey eyes.
‘Let me get you a drink.’
‘I have one, thank you.’
‘You do?’
‘Yes. I got here a little early. I didn’t know what you might want so I didn’t get yours I’m afraid … and now I feel really rude. Oh God, I’m bad at this. I’m used to getting rounds in.’
Cal chuckled. ‘I love your femininity.’
I clonked him on the arm with my feminine bag.
‘Anyway, you’re not supposed to get mine. I’m supposed to get them.’
‘You do know what year it is, don’t you? A woman can buy a man a drink.’
‘I know, I know. I didn’t mean it like that.’ He rubbed a hand over his freshly shaven jaw.
‘Besides, this isn’t a date anyway.’ I fiddled with the straw in my drink for a moment. ‘Is it?
Cal didn’t answer.
‘I’d rather you just be yourself,’ I said, feeling the need to fill the silence between us.
Cal gave me a long look. ‘Good advice.’ He lifted the non-alcoholic beer he’d ordered from the bar and raised a quizzical brow. ‘I’m not sure why, but you seem nervous tonight. More so than you did the other night.’ He bent close to me. ‘Don’t worry. I promise I’m not going to do anything you don’t want me to.’ The uninvited thoughts of where that statement took me caused another rush of heat to my chest and face. ‘I said friends, and I meant it. So perhaps we should both just be ourselves?’ he finished.
I took a sip. ‘In that case, I need to nip home and put my jeans on.’
Cal grinned. ‘Don’t you dare! I love this look. I’m making the most of it.’
‘That might be a good idea because it’s unlikely you’ll see it again for a while.’
He slanted his eyes towards me. ‘You decided to take the job.’
‘What? No … I … I mean. Yes, I probably will but that’s not what I meant about the dress. I just don’t tend to wear them very often.’
‘Maybe you should.’ Cal held me in that gaze again and the hint of a smile teased the corners of his mouth. ‘Maybe you should try something different. You might find it suits you.’
With some effort, I broke the gaze. ‘The last time I tried something different it didn’t end well, so I think probably I’m just best at sticking with what I know.’
‘Then how you do ever discover new things?’
‘New things can be over-rated in my opinion.’
He shook his head, the smile still in place as he steered me carefully away from a bar that was beginning to get busier and louder, his arm protectively blocking me from any bumps or shuffles.
‘I think you like wearing that dress.’
‘Oh pfftt.’
His smile broke into a grin. ‘Now I definitely know I’m right.’
‘Cal, your table’s ready.’ With perfect timing, the owner appeared through the restaurant door, easily spotting Cal thanks to his height and size among the crowd.
‘Ready?’ Cal asked.
I nodded and he indicated for me to go first, his hand resting ever so gently on the small of my back as we were shown to the table.
‘Carly will be with you in just a moment.’ The owner smiled at us both and headed off into the kitchen.
‘Can I say – as a friend – you really do look beautiful,’ Cal said, his eyes on me as he took his seat.
I couldn’t help the smile that formed, both at the tease and at the compliment. It was a long time since I’d felt, or been told, I looked beautiful.
‘Thanks. You look … good too.’ I gave myself a mental kick at the lameness of my repartee. The truth was, Cal always looked good. Not in a spend hours in front of the mirror way, just in a natural, effortless style way. I, on the other hand, had indeed spent hours in front of the mirror, and had definite help in the form of Giselle.
‘I mean, not that you don’t always look lovely, but –’
‘It’s fine, Cal. I know I don’t do the whole hair and make-up thing a lot.
‘You look lovely with, or without.’
Flicking him a slightly awkward smile, I turned my attention to faffing with my napkin for a moment.
‘Have you decided what you’d like?’ The waitress was keen, young, pretty, and smiling full wattage at Cal. I got the distinct feeling she wished she was on his menu.
‘To be honest, we haven’t had a chance to look yet.’ He smiled disarmingly, charming
her. ‘Could you give us a few more minutes?’
‘Of course, sir.’ She flashed him a big smile, turned, and walked off, her hips swaying a little more than they had on the way over.
‘Perhaps we should choose,’ I said.
Cal looked at me for a moment. I could see he’d figured out that there was something else going on here, something unsaid. But we both knew the waitress would be back shortly, interrupting the conversation flow again.
‘Yes. Of course. You’re right. Do you know what you’re having?’
I scanned the menu and made my choice. Indecision when it came to food wasn’t a problem I ever experienced.
‘Yep.’
‘Please tell me it’s not salad.’
‘OK. It’s not salad.’
‘But is it actually salad?’
‘No. Of course not. It’s bloody freezing out there. Why would I be ordering salad with only a few weeks until Christmas?’
‘It’s not exactly unknown for a lot of women to order salad, even when they don’t need to.’ He pulled a face that indicated he wished he’d never started this conversation.
‘Oh. I see. Yes. Well, each to their own I guess. Personally, in this weather I want good old rib-sticking, stodgy, warming goodness. Not a couple of lettuce leaves and a pretty radish, however good it might be for me.’
Cal grinned. ‘I’m glad to hear it.’
‘You might not be, when you have to try and get me to move later.’
‘I’m sure we can come up with a solution.’
The waitress was soon back, taking our orders on an electronic tablet and checking that we were OK for drinks, suggesting a wine we might like. I was definitely not going to drink anything. I needed a clear head so that I could avoid doing something stupid, like – say – kissing Cal Martin because for once I felt pretty and he’d told me I looked beautiful. And kissing Cal Martin was, as I had already told myself, a bad idea. As would be alcohol.
‘I’ll have a large white wine, please.’ Oh well. It’s the thought that counts, right?
‘And for you, sir?’
‘Just mineral water, please. Still. Thanks.’
‘Great. I’ll be back in just a moment with those.’
Silence settled over the table momentarily.
‘George was really excited about going over to Dan and Claire’s tonight. It was kind of them to invite him.’
I gave a wave of my hand. ‘They love it. All the kids love going to their place, especially in the summer with that fantastic tree house he built.’
Cal fiddled with the better knife for a second. ‘I heard about the miscarriage. It’s heartbreaking the problems they’ve had. They’re so great with the children.’
I looked off to where the waitress was setting up our drinks on a tray, my stomach twisting a little at Cal’s comment.
My face obviously twisted a little too.
‘Should I have not said anything?’ He let out a breath. ‘I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have …’
‘It’s OK.’ I turned back to him and gave a practised smile as the waitress arrived with our drinks order. ‘You’re right. It is heartbreaking.’
I took a sip of the cool, crisp wine, its fruity notes zinging around my taste buds before replacing the glass on the table. For some reason, my nerves had me wanting to down the whole glass and order another before the waitress had even turned on her stiletto heel, even though I knew that wasn’t a good idea. Cal was still looking uncomfortable at the thought of having put his foot in something. He lifted his gaze and held me in it.
‘I can hold a meeting with anyone and not be fazed. Make deals for cars worth hundreds of thousands but I don’t feel like I’m getting things right with you this evening. Which is kind of weird because normally I feel completely relaxed with you. And I thought you did with me too. So, I’m guessing between the other night, and this evening, something’s changed. Any chance you want to share what that is with me?’ His hand left the fork he’d been worrying alone and he sat up a little straighter.
‘It’s nothing. Really.’ I could see that he didn’t believe me. I wasn’t a good liar and normally I didn’t care. It wasn’t a skill I was interested in honing, but right now it would have been easier if Cal Martin couldn’t immediately see through me.
‘If it’s nothing, then why do you look so sad?’
What I really wanted to say was that none of this was fair. Not on him or me. It wasn’t fair that I’d finally met a man I felt so comfortable with, could be myself with, had a tonne in common with, and who actually liked me – and I still couldn’t have him.
‘Dan told me himself about everything, you know. I’m not gossiping. Believe me. That’s definitely not my style.’
My eyes widened. ‘Oh goodness, no. I didn’t think you were. Not for a moment. I think it’s pretty obvious it’s not. Although you must have got used to all that a little by now, having been here for a while. It’s hard to keep anything a secret here. I assume you know the fact that we’re friends – and more than, according to some – is already a favourite topic of conversation in the village. By tomorrow, they’ll know exactly what we ate tonight.’
‘Is that true?’ Cal looked a little unsure.
I gave a little head wobble. ‘For the most part, yes. It’s a great village. But it’s shit at keeping secrets and great at gossip, even though that gossip generally isn’t unkind.’
‘Right.’
‘You’re putting the house on the market tomorrow, aren’t you?’
Cal let out a laugh, and his beautiful smile lifted the concern from his face. ‘Not a chance.’
‘OK. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.’
‘So, hypothetically, if I were to lean across right now and kiss you, you’re saying that might be headline news tomorrow?’
I tried not to smile. ‘I’m pretty sure that might even make the late edition.’
Hypothetically I didn’t give a monkey’s and right now I wanted nothing more than for him to follow through. I stole a look at him through my lashes as he glanced at the screen on his phone. He’d already apologised for having it out but he had a small child at home and I understood. Running a hand around the back of his collar, he then stretched his neck, tension showing on his face.
I shouldn’t have said yes to dinner. We were too close. This was too close to what each of us wanted it to be, and what both of us knew it couldn’t be.
Chapter Thirteen
I craned my neck around Cal. Where the heck was our food? I desperately needed a distraction from those eyes and that body. I could see him looking at me as I kept my eyes on my wine glass. He knew I wasn’t as calm as I looked. Which in truth probably wasn’t very. He knew something was up, and somehow he also knew that trying to force it out of me was probably the worse thing he could do. I’d dated Marco for well over a year and he never did figure that out.
‘So, this car of yours we were talking about? Have you had a chance to do much work on it since you’ve been home?’
I shook my head, the relief of being back on a topic I was comfortable with obviously showing on my face, if the twitch of Cal’s dark brow was anything to go by.
‘No, unfortunately. Between helping out with the festival stuff, plus the upsurge in orders we’ve had since the shop got featured in that glossy mag, there just hasn’t been the time. It’s kind of crazy how much influence these things can have, isn’t it?’
He nodded as he took a sip from his mineral water.
‘When I have had the chance to do a bit, it’s been so damn cold in the barn. Like you said the other night, I’ve gone soft too.’
‘I don’t think anyone could accuse you of being soft, Lexi.’
I swallowed, accepting that. It was after all the face I’d been putting out to the world for most of my life. Acting like nothing bothered me. Only my family and close friends knew the truth.
‘Although I’m pretty sure that’s all a front. I don’t think anyone who’s as tough as you like
to try and make out goes around mending teddy bears and taking care of people the way you do.’
‘That’s just being a nice person.’
‘No, I think it’s being a softie.’
My mouth made an “o” shape. ‘Don’t you dare go spreading rumours like that about me!’
He laughed and I felt it wrap itself around me, warm and comforting, just like the scarf I’d tied on George’s Bear the first time I’d met them.
‘What rumour? That you’re a marshmallow inside?’ His mouth was serious but there was humour in the eyes. That and a shadow of wariness.
‘Anyway, I’m not sure I’m going to be able to finish getting it ready to take Dad out in as a surprise at Christmas like I planned. I might have to think of something else and make that a birthday present.’ Although I knew that once I took this job, getting home was going to go back to being much more infrequent. It was easier to rent a flat nearer the factory so living at home, or even somewhere in the village, was going to involve a killer of a commute. Plus the travel abroad once the season kicked in. ‘To be honest, I might have to look into paying someone to do it. At least then Dad could take it out for me occasionally, get some use out of it instead of it sitting there looking sad and unloved.’
‘We could take it over to my workshop? I’ve just shipped out an order so I’ve got some space at the moment. It’s warm and dry and you can come and do stuff on it as and when you get the time. But if you’re OK with it, I can get the guys to do a bit of work on it too so that you meet your Christmas deadline.’
‘Oh, Cal, that’s really lovely of you. But I couldn’t ask –’
‘You didn’t ask,’ he pointed out. ‘I offered.’
‘Yes, but …’ It was a brilliant offer and really would help. But I didn’t feel right accepting it. I’d already got to know Cal’s generous nature first hand, and from what my family and friends had told me. I knew he’d end up doing a lot more than just provide a warm space to work. But Dad would be so thrilled to see his car restored back to glory again …
‘Whatever it is you’re thinking, don’t. There’s no caveat. I’m not expecting anything. It’s just a favour, and frankly, it hurts me to see that poor old thing sat there when it could be a real beauty.’
The Best Little Christmas Shop Page 14
