Love Me Again

by Jaci Burton

  "She's happy," Josie said.

  Loretta nodded. "Yes, she's having a wonderful summer. She's happy at the farm, she's made new friends, and she loves her dog."

  "Wouldn't it be great if that's all it took to be happy?"

  "Yes."

  "Though I need to get a dog. Maybe a cat, too. And a rabbit."

  Loretta looked over at her. "The secret to happiness?"

  Josie laughed. "Maybe not. But it's a good start."

  "Animal lover?"

  "Absolutely. I lived in a town house in Atlanta, and I didn't get to have animals there. I'm going to have plenty at the house here."

  "Hazel would be happy to take you to the animal shelter in Hope and help get you started."

  Josie offered up a crooked smile. "I'll bet she would. I'd probably come home with way too many animals. I can't say no when I see them in their cages there."

  "Then you need to take me with you. I'll make sure you start with only one."

  "Done deal. In the meantime, all my friends have animals I can love on."

  "This is true."

  They swam back out to the tubes and climbed on. Eventually, they had all the kids piling on them, pushing them off, and then Zach suggested they take one of the tubes for a ride, so they took turns. Loretta held on to Hazel and went first.

  It was exhilarating, with wind and water blowing on her face, the tube bouncing, and Hazel slamming against her. She was certain she'd be black and blue with bruises tomorrow. Also, she'd never had more fun than she'd had today. Hazel was screaming with laughter the entire time.

  Will took Tabitha the next round, and it was even more fun watching them bounce over the water. Deacon went with Ryan, and she wasn't sure she'd ever seen Deacon laugh that much. It was kind of hard not to enjoy yourself when you had a kid in your arms and you were flying over the wake, tons of water splashing over you.

  Then Josie went by herself, and Loretta could have sworn that Zach sped up the boat, because Josie bounced higher over the waves than any of the others had. When she flew off the tube, she tumbled over and over. But she was grinning when Zach pulled up alongside her, and she swam toward the boat.

  "You totally did that on purpose."

  Zach arched a brow as he reached for her hand to haul her back on board. "Did what on purpose?"

  She shoved at him. "Now it's your turn."

  "Oh, no. I'm the driver."

  "Bull--" Josie looked around at the kids. "Puckey. I can drive the boat. You get on the tube."

  "You can drive this boat?"

  "Yes, I can. Go on, into the water with you. Trust me."

  He gave her a dubious look, but then dove in and climbed onto the tube.

  Loretta didn't know what to make of Josie's evil laugh, but Josie pushed the throttle forward and started slow, then picked up speed. And then she went a little faster, and even faster. Suddenly Zach was airborne, zooming over wakes just as Josie had been. And when he catapulted off the tube, she spun the boat around to go pick him up.

  Loretta figured they were even. And when Zach swam up to the boat, Josie gave him a satisfied smirk.

  "You did that on purpose."

  She gave him an innocent look. "Did what on purpose?"

  He shook his head, but gave her a smile.

  Loretta noticed a definite spark between those two. She made a mental note to talk to Josie about it later, when they had time alone.

  They enjoyed snacks and drinks on the boat, took a ride for a while, and did some waterskiing. Loretta begged off on that, but she watched the others. Deacon was very good at slalom skiing, expertly maneuvering his ski over the waves. He stayed up the entire time until he let go of the rope and dropped down in the water.

  Will skied, and so did Ryan, who was very good at it and obviously had some experience.

  Then Hazel wanted to try waterskiing, which gave Loretta some trepidation, but she figured her daughter had to learn sometime. Both Zach and Deacon gave her instructions on how to lean back and not forward, and how to let go of the rope when she fell.

  "I promise not to go too fast with her, Loretta," Zach said.

  "I totally trust you, Zach." Mostly.

  Deacon sat at the back of the boat to watch her so he could signal Zach when she was down. Loretta decided to go back there to sit next to Deacon. That way she could keep an eye on her, too.

  "She's going to be fine, ya know," Deacon said.

  "Of course she will. Totally fine." Loretta wasn't sure if she was trying to convince Deacon or herself.

  Deacon put his arm around her and squeezed. "Kids are better at this than adults. Trust me. I won't let anything bad happen to her."

  She looked at him and realized she did trust him.

  Hazel grinned and waved at them.

  She went down immediately on her first try. Loretta didn't realize she'd been holding her breath the entire time until Hazel splashed into the water. Then she came up laughing, and Loretta exhaled.

  "She's fine, see?" Deacon said.

  Loretta nodded.

  She went down again right away on her second try. And her third. She always came up smiling. But her daughter was nothing if not determined, and she got up the next time. Loretta stood in the boat and lifted up her arms, feeling triumphant. Hazel stayed up for a fair amount of time before falling. Then she got up again and went even longer.

  "Let's pull her out," Zach said. "I don't want her to get too tired."

  Deacon gave her the signal, and Hazel swam toward the boat.

  Deacon grinned at Loretta. "She did good for her first time waterskiing."

  "She did, didn't she?"

  After Hazel climbed aboard, she came over to Loretta and gave her a tight squeeze. "I did it, Mama. Did you see me?"

  "I did. You were so good."

  "Did you see me, Deacon?"

  "You skied like a champion."

  Hazel grinned, then threw her arms around Deacon and hugged him. "Thanks, Deacon."

  Loretta's chest tightened as she watched the bond forming between Deacon and her daughter.

  After that, Tabby wanted to go, and since she'd skied before, she got up right away, though she wasn't quite as experienced as her older brother, who had skied like he'd been born to it.

  "Everyone ready to head back?" Zach asked, making sure to address the adults, since it was obvious the kids would stay at this until dark.

  Everyone agreed, so Zach drove the boat back to the house. The guys took the cooler inside, and Josie and Loretta followed to unpack everything and clean out the coolers.

  Megan, Sam, and Jane were inside prepping dinner. Reid and Brady had already cleaned the fish, which was great, since Loretta was getting hungry, and she knew the kids would be, too. The kids had jumped in the pool for a swim while they fixed dinner, which was no surprise. All three of them were like fish. Loretta gave some thought to putting a pool in at the ranch. Hazel would enjoy that so much.

  "I made mojitos," Sam said, handing her a drink.

  "That sounds amazing. Mine's coming with me to sip while I take a shower."

  She started down the hall.

  "Hey."

  She stopped and turned to see Deacon following her. "Hey."

  "Did you have fun on the boat?"

  Her lips lifted. "So much fun I might just squat in this house and never leave."

  He laughed. "Hazel would enjoy that."

  "She definitely would. Thanks for teaching her to waterski today. She had such a good time."

  "I could tell." He put his arm around her, then took a brief glance down the hall before brushing his lips against hers. "No alone time for us again."

  "I know." She palmed his chest, letting her nails dig into his shirt. "Maybe later."

  "Definitely later. These kids are all going to be tired by the time we get through fireworks."

  He gave her another brief kiss, then rubbed his thumb across her lips. "At some point you and I need a weekend alone."

  Just the thought o
f it made her entire body quiver. "We need to make that happen."

  He took a step back, and she walked into her bedroom with a smile on her face.

  Chapter 26

  * * *

  DEACON AND THE other guys took care of breading and frying the catfish for dinner while the women fixed some amazing side dishes. It was hot as hell outside, so they gathered up in the house and ate.

  He ate a lot of fish. He had worked up an appetite being out on the water, and he wasn't about to apologize for filling his plate with the side dishes as well. He couldn't resist the coleslaw, potato salad, watermelon, spinach, and rolls.

  And then Megan had made a blueberry and strawberry sponge cake topped with whipped cream that melted in his mouth.

  "We should all live together," Sam said as she ate the last bite of her dessert. "I could get used to this food."

  "I could get used to someone else cooking for me every day," Jane said. "Especially if there's dessert."

  Will put his arm around her. "Glad to see you got your appetite back in time for dinner."

  She leaned her head against his shoulder. "It was perfect timing. I would have hated to miss out on that cake."

  "I like dessert," Ryan said.

  "Me, too," Tabby said.

  "At least the kids burn it all off," Loretta said. "I'm going to need a long walk before bed tonight. I'm so full."

  After dinner, they cleaned up, then sat outside by the dock. It was just about sunset, which meant the lake community would be starting their fireworks show soon.

  Fortunately, they had all brought some of their own fireworks for the kids, so as soon as it got dark enough, there were sparklers and snakes and a few sizzlers, which they set off near the water. Will had the hose at the ready, and they'd prepared a bucket of water to toss the used sparklers in. They left the dogs in the house with the TV sound turned up so they wouldn't be scared by all the loud noises.

  Deacon loved watching Hazel's face light up as she dashed around the backyard with sparklers in both hands, waving them around. He enjoyed watching Loretta running around with her even more. She had a childlike enthusiasm about her that punched him right in the heart. And hearing her laugh with her daughter brought back memories to some of the Fourth of Julys they'd shared together.

  When she collapsed in the chair next to him, he tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. "Remember when we went to the lake on the Fourth that one summer?"

  She looked at him for a few seconds, then nodded. "Oh, right. You and me and a bunch of our friends. We packed a cooler of food and drinks, swam all day, then sat on the bed of your truck and watched the fireworks. And then I ended up grounded because I got home late."

  "I remember. We couldn't see each other for a week after that."

  She nodded, then leaned over and brushed her shoulder against his. "It was worth it. Fun day."

  His lips curved. "Yeah, it was."

  He was glad she remembered the good parts of it. And now, as his gaze met hers, he wanted nothing more than to kiss her. But they were in a crowd of people, one of whom was her daughter, who sat right at her feet. But the way Loretta looked at him told him she wanted the same thing.

  A little restraint was a good thing, right?

  The first pop of fireworks across the lake distracted him from his need to put his lips against Loretta's. He settled in to watch the explosions of color and light. The kids all screamed and everyone yelled out as each firework seemed to get bigger and brighter.

  "Oh, look at that one," Hazel said. "Did you see it, Mama?"

  Loretta laid her hands over Hazel's shoulders. "I did. And look at that one, Hazel. All the colors."

  Deacon sat back and enjoyed the show, both in the sky and on the ground. Hazel stomped her feet and squealed, then she and Tabitha held hands and giggled together as they watched.

  Looked like Hazel had made a new best friend. He was happy for that. Hazel and Tabitha got up and went to the edge of the dock, letting their legs dangle as they sat together, their heads tilted back as they watched the rest of the show.

  "I'll bet they'll be friends forever after this weekend," he said to Loretta.

  Loretta nodded. "I sure hope so."

  The fireworks ended with a finale of multiple, colorful explosions, then all went quiet.

  They had the kids burn off some excess energy by letting them play outside with the dogs for a while before sending them inside to get ready for bed. Deacon, Zach, Will, and Brady cleaned up outside while everyone else went in.

  "Hell of a party here," Deacon said to Zach as they put away all the lawn furniture and secured the boat. "We sure had a good time."

  Zach grinned. "Yeah, it was fun, wasn't it? I'm glad my friends decided to spend the holiday in the Hamptons with their family."

  Deacon arched a brow. "You must know some interesting people."

  He shrugged. "Yeah, I know a few."

  Zach was an enigmatic guy. He didn't reveal a lot about himself other than that he loved teaching and coaching the high school football team. He was a great guy and Deacon had grown to like him a lot, but he didn't know a lot about his background. He knew he'd moved here to Hope a couple of years ago from Detroit, that he was an ex-football player who'd suffered a career-ending injury. Zach didn't talk much about his football career. Maybe he was just a guy who liked to look forward, not back.

  Deacon knew all about the looking-forward thing. Mostly. Maybe he hadn't completely shut the door on the past. But everything in his past with Loretta hadn't been bad, so why would he want to shut that away?

  "Anyway, thanks for inviting me. I had a great time."

  Zach grinned. "Anytime. I'm all about gathering my friends together and having some fun."

  They finished up in the backyard, then everyone headed inside. Josie was in the kitchen unloading the dishwasher, and Zach went to help her. Loretta came down the hall, so Deacon met her in the living room.

  "Did you get Hazel settled in?"

  Loretta nodded. "She's still a little hyped up from all the fireworks excitement, so I left her reading. I'm sure once she settles down, she'll fall right to sleep. It's been a hectic day, and I know she's tired."

  He ran his hands down her arms. "Do you need to be in there with her?"

  "Oh, no. If I stayed in there with her she'd want to talk all night, and then she'd never go to sleep. It's best if I give her some quiet time."

  "Then how about a walk?"

  She looked down the hall. "I don't know."

  "I'll keep an eye on her for you," Josie said.

  Loretta looked around Deacon to Josie. "Are you sure?"

  "Of course. I'm not going anywhere but the sofa right now."

  "Thanks, Josie. I won't be gone long."

  Josie offered up a knowing smile. "Take your time."

  "Yeah," Zach said. "Take your time. We've got this."

  Deacon gave a nod to Zach, and they headed out the front door. As soon as he closed the door, he took Loretta's hand and they started up the path. It was hot and muggy outside, and Deacon could already feel his shirt clinging to him. There were probably already a billion mosquitos ready to dive-bomb them, but they'd put on repellent earlier before the fireworks, so hopefully that would protect them. All he wanted was a few minutes of alone time with Loretta before the end of the night.

  "Did you have a good time?" he asked as they crested the hill.

  She looked over at him and gave him a warm smile. "I had such a great time. Thank you for bringing Hazel and me. She had a blast. She's going to be so wiped out she'll probably need to go to bed early for the rest of the week."

  "It's good for her to get out and try new things, have a little fun. Before you know it, school will be starting."

  Loretta nodded. "Just a little over a month. That reminds me, I need to make a mental note to get some cute notebooks into the bookstore. I think the schoolkids would really like that."

  "See? A little walk to clear your head and you're already thi
nking of work things."

  She let out a quiet laugh. "Sorry. I didn't mean to let work intrude on our minivacation."

  He stopped and turned to face her. "Hey, it's okay. That's your livelihood, and it's important to you. Don't ever apologize for making that a priority in your life."

  She tilted her head to the side. "You've been so nice to me. Why?"

  He frowned. "What?"

  "Ever since we got past that initial period of being uncomfortable around each other. You've been nice to me. Forgiving. I don't know, Deacon. I just don't feel like I deserve the way you treat me."

  "So you want me to be mean to you?"

  She let out a short laugh. "I don't know. Maybe that's what I'm used to. Or maybe that's how I feel you should act around me. I was terrible to you, Deacon. I dumped you. I just don't understand how you could even speak to me, let alone want to be around me after all that happened between us in the past."

  He placed his hands on her shoulders. "Are you the same person you were all those years ago? God, Loretta, you were barely eighteen then. We were just teenagers trying to make the best decisions we could. You had all those forces bombarding you. Me, your parents, Tom, his parents. Everyone was telling you what was best for your future. You made what you thought was the right choice. I didn't always make the best decisions at that time, either."

  She'd been looking down at the ground, but she lifted her head, and he saw the misery reflected in her eyes. "But you didn't hurt anyone in the process."

  "How do you know what I did or didn't do? You were gone. I made some tough choices, hurt some people in relationships. It happens. You feel shitty about it and you hopefully mend fences. Sometimes you don't, and you have regrets about it. You've got to stop beating yourself up over what happened between us. If I'm okay about it, shouldn't you be okay about it, too?"

  She heaved in a deep breath. "I . . . guess."

  He folded her against him. "Stop bringing it up, Loretta. It's over. It's in the past. It's done."

  She laid her head against his shoulder. "Okay. I'll try."

  He took a step back. "Try really hard."

  "It's just that you're so . . . nice."

  His lips curved. "I'm not always nice."

  They started walking again. It finally started to cool off some, though for July, that meant it was probably ninety degrees instead of ninety-five. But the sun wasn't beating down on them, and that meant he wasn't sweating, so it would do.

  "When were you not nice?"

  His gaze snapped to Loretta. "What?"