Indian Moon

by Carolyn McCray

  The woman demurred. “Maybe just one. Something light.”

  After ordering, Quinton allowed himself to lean back and just take in the moment. The candlelight was perfect. The music was perfect. The mood was perfect. So why had he not taken her hand? Probably because she was married, and he was still smarting from last night when she had pulled away from him. Taking a risk, he reached across the table and stroked her finger with his own. Regina opened her hand a bit and allowed his hand to slide into her palm.

  “Have you been here before?” Quinton asked, just trying to fill the void before he said something really damning.

  “No. I’ve heard about it but never been here. This is my first time.”

  Was there something more to her words than just discussing the restaurant? Quinton thought so, and he wanted to be sure that she knew that this was not commonplace for him either. “Me too.”

  Regina smiled more deeply and gave his hand a gentle squeeze. Quinton was glad that he had read her correctly. He did not want her thinking he did this at every town he audited. Quinton was not like Ralph. “Find out anything more about what the Sheriff was talking about?”

  “No,” the woman finished sipping her wine, leaving a faint imprint of lipstick on the glass. “Natalie will track it down, I’m sure.”

  “I thought she was going out of town this weekend?”

  “She was but canceled at the last minute. I think your assistant had something to do with it.”

  Quinton was not sure if Ralph would be happy or upset with this news, but he cared little for the younger man’s problems. He wanted to find out more about this woman sitting across from him. “You asked me last night, and now I’d love to hear your answer. What makes you so complicated?”

  “Not a whole lot I’m afraid. I haven’t had the life you have. I didn’t even finish high school. I mean, I got my GED but that was much later.”

  “I don’t mean to pry, but you must have been awfully young when you had your son.”

  The woman nodded, a bit sadly. “Married at sixteen. Mother at seventeen.”

  “But your husband... He’s a lot...”

  “Older? Yeah, by about fifteen years. Back then, I thought that meant he was more mature and stable.”

  Quinton took a risk and asked. “And now?”

  “Now? I think he was a creep bordering on pedophile.” Regina seemed shocked at both her words and her bitter tone of voice. She tried to apologize, but Quinton would not let her.

  “Sounds pretty accurate to me. That’s why there are laws against those kinds of arrangements.”

  The woman looked away. Unshed tears glistened in the candlelight. Regina pulled her hand away a bit, but Quinton gently squeezed her fingers. She could break their contact, but he wanted her to know that he did not want her to. When Regina turned back, a stray tear streamed down her cheek. Quinton took his other hand and wiped it away. Before his fingers pulled back, Quinton’s palm caressed the side of face. For the briefest of moments, Regina leaned into his hand.

  Quinton would have stayed like that forever, except their waiter returned with their hor’deurves. Worse, the sampler platter of appetizers was huge, and Quinton had to release Regina’s hand as well, or the server never could have fit the dish onto the table. The platter was overflowing with all manner of rich food: calamari, stuffed mushrooms, fried shrimp, oysters, and frog legs. What had they been thinking ordering all of this food? And their dinners were yet to come. Quinton looked over the table to find Regina looking equally incredulous at the banquet set out before them.

  “Guess we didn’t need to order both soup and salad,” Regina said, clearly amazed at the sheer volume of food.

  Quinton groaned, “Oh, I’d forgotten about those...”

  Whether the moment was all that funny or it was just a nice change of pace from the previous intensity, they both laughed. Tears streamed down Regina’s face, but Quinton did not question her about their origin. They both needed this relaxing breather.

  Their conversation drifted from the weather to her kids and back again to the local climatic conditions. Talking to Regina was so very easy. Quinton had to keep reminding himself that they had only known each other for a few days. There was a casualness about their relating that Quinton had sorely missed in his life. Even talking about her daughter’s soccer practice was soothing to his soul.

  Somewhere along their carefree conversation, the topic turned back to Wayne. Quinton was not even quite sure how it got there, but suddenly Regina’s husband felt like he was present in the room. The mood was right, and Quinton took a chance.

  “I know this is personal, but why do you stay with him?”

  Regina’s face sagged a bit, and she shrugged. “Why do you stay with your company? You know it’s bad for you. You know it’s not who you are, but still you plug along.”

  Quinton felt his lips tremble, and he had to force himself to keep his emotions under control. Why did this damn discussion keep turning on him? It was Regina he wanted to know about.

  The silence prolonged for a few more seconds, then Regina smiled as she said, “That wasn’t a rhetorical question. Why do you?”

  Quinton’s insides churned. Quickly he was in as much physical discomfort as emotional distress. Regina looked like she was going to say something which forced Quinton to speak again. He did not want her thinking that he was emotionally distant or uncomfortable with speaking about feelings. Of course, right now, he felt emotionally distant and was extremely uncomfortable talking about his feelings, but Regina was worth the turmoil.

  Preparing himself for Regina’s possible reaction, Quinton blurted out the truth. “Until the last few days, I didn’t know it could be different.” Despite the clutter on the table, Quinton found Regina’s hand. “Until I met you, I forgot that I could be different.”

  For a moment, Quinton did not know if the woman was going to cry or shout. Regina’s eyes blinked furiously, trying unsuccessfully to hold in the tears. Then it was as if a dam broke. Suddenly, Regina began talking. All of this pain and fear poured out of the woman. At first, Quinton felt he was riding a small skiff during a winter squall, then her words started sinking in.

  If he had hated Wayne before this, he now loathed the arrogant bastard. To hear about all the verbal, physical, and emotional abuse Wayne had unloaded on Regina was almost too much to bear. Quinton wanted to drive over to Bend and wring the bastard’s neck. But that was not what Regina needed right now. Right now, she needed someone to listen to it all. To let her finally vomit up all the black dregs of her soul and allow the healing to begin.

  Her discourse did not stop even when the servers came and quietly took away their dirty dishes and brought the main course. Regina’s sordid life history flowed past it all. No matter what happened to the table’s contents, Quinton held tightly to the woman’s hand. He knew she needed an anchor to allow her to let loose like this. Finally, she broke into repressed sobs and could no longer speak. Quinton held her hand until she stopped shaking. Even when she pulled away to wipe her tears, Quinton made sure to cradle her feet with his own, keeping the physical connection alive.

  “I’m so sorry. I don’t know what got into me,” Regina said as she straightened her make-up. She looked so upset and embarrassed that Quinton took her hand away from her face.

  “It’s fine. You look fine.” Quinton knew, though, no matter how much he consoled her, Regina was still going to feel awkward about revealing that much of herself to a near stranger. The scales needed to be balanced if they were to move on from here. But that would mean Quinton had to open up himself and share as much as she had. Taking a deep breath, Quinton prepared to bear his heart to the woman sitting across from him.

  ***

  Regina was squirming in her seat. Had she gone completely insane? Blabbering on like that? Spilling out all those intimate details? Some of which Wayne did not even know, and her complaints were about him? How badly Regina just wanted to excuse herself and go to the rest-room.
Dinner was almost over anyway, and she could make some apology and get home. This had to have been the worst idea of her entire life. The guy probably thought she was some kind of Jerry Springer nut-case.

  “Remember, I told you I had lost a lot in the past? That I was afraid to lose it all again?” Quinton asked softly, his voice barely above a whisper.

  She could only nod. Her throat was still constricted with tears.

  Luckily, Quinton continued, “I was engaged. A long time ago.” The man looked lost in thought. “Jesus, it was over fifteen years ago. We were both in our early twenties, and you know how it is. Everything seemed so straight forward. So do-able.”

  Regina really did not understand, but she nodded anyway. This was Quinton’s story, and she was not going to interrupt it with her own sad feelings of loss and disappointment. They sat hand in hand, and Regina repositioned her feet so that she both her feet were in contact with Quinton’s. She wanted him to feel her support as he had given it so freely to her.

  “We met -- Caitlyn and I -- in Canada. Well, I guess that doesn’t really matter how we met.”

  Squeezing his hand, Regina smiled encouragingly. “Please. I’d love to hear the long version.”

  Quinton grinned back, but she could see that he was already in the grips of the painful memory. “I was doing a logistics study on reintroduction of the wolf back into Yellowstone and was following a Canadian pack to see if we could use them to transplant. Caitlyn was a wildlife photographer doing a moose layout for Wildlife International. We didn’t even know there was another human being for miles around.”

  Regina allowed Quinton a long pause. It was obviously difficult for him to discuss this subject. As much as she wanted to hear the tale, Regina did not want to rush him.

  “Anyway, inevitably the wolves did what they are meant to do, and my pack attacked a moose cow and her calf, nearly bringing down the baby.” Quinton sniffled, and it looked like he wiped away a tear, but the action had been so quick, Regina could not be sure. His voice was thicker as he continued. “Even though the number one rule in wildlife observation is never to interfere with the natural order of things. I just couldn’t watch them kill this pitiful young moose, so I charged out of the brush and startled the wolves. Caitlyn ended up doing the same thing at the same moment. I think we scared each other as much as we did the animals.”

  A faint smile crossed Quinton’s lips. “Obviously, we were both embarrassed. I mean, we were both professionals and had broken a taboo like some kind of geeky tourists. Still, neither one of us could stomach letting the wolves kill the calf, but the pack had pups to feed and we couldn’t let them starve so...”

  Quinton stopped as the waiter cleared away a few more dishes. Regina took the opportunity to squeeze Quinton’s hand again. She even got so bold as to kick off her high heel and caress his ankle with her foot.

  “So, we did the only thing open to us. We set out our own food for the wolf pack. Those canines never had it so good. Unfortunately, a storm blew in. She and I were stranded in the back country with no supplies. Luckily, she had some Girl Scout cookies that I wouldn’t let her give to the wolves, and I had held back some protein bars. We subsisted on those until I was able to radio for a rescue helicopter.”

  Regina filled the long pause. “Sounds like you two were meant to be together. What happened?”

  The temporary smile faded from Quinton’s face. “We were together for two years. No fights, no anything. Just big plans for the future and a huge church wedding for her family. By then, we had both joined on with Greenpeace and were on assignment in Thailand.” Quinton’s voice lingered on the country’s name.

  When he did not continue, Regina asked. “I hear it’s beautiful there.”

  “Oh, it’s astonishing. It’s a strange country, though, even back then. There are skyscrapers yet hand-pulled taxis in the street. We were... we were late for our flight, and the traffic was a snarl so we decided to make a dash across the street...”

  Regina stroked the outside of his hand with her finger. Quinton’s eyelashes were damp, and his jaw was clenched.

  “Neither of us saw the ox cart until it was too late. The animal most have gotten spooked by all the bicycle horns because it charged forward and... Caitlyn was caught underneath the wheels.”

  “Oh god, I’m so sorry.”

  Quinton was looking off into the distance. “There was no such thing as ambulances over there, let alone trauma centers. By the time we freed her and got her to a hospital, it was too late. She hung on for a few hours, but she finally died at six eighteen p.m.”

  Regina had no words of consolation to offer him that would soften this pain. She just let him sit in silence for as long as he needed. Soon, his breathing became more steady, and his eyes dried up a bit. Even though they spoke no words, their touch conveyed enough caring that both of them were comfortable with the quiet.

  That was why it was easy for the waiter to startle them. “Would either of you care for dessert?”

  Both blurt out, “No.”

  With all of the intense emotion, they both started laughing, leaving the waiter to wonder about their sanity. Quinton recovered first.

  “No, thank you. Please, just bring the check.”

  Regina went to get her wallet, but Quinton stopped her.

  “I’m paying tonight.”

  “But --”

  Quinton shook his head. “I don’t want Wayne to be able to lay any claim on this evening. It is my gift to you.”

  Regina never would have chosen such an expensive restaurant if she had known Quinton was going to pick up the bill, but she was delighted at his consideration. It was the best present he could ever give her.

  ***

  Quinton was surprised at how cool the night had become as they walked out of the restaurant. It had also rained, leaving the street slick and shiny. He held onto Regina’s arm as they exited to be sure that she did not slip on the treacherous pavement.

  “Oh, doesn’t it just smell delicious out here?”

  He took in another appreciative breath. “There is no better aroma in the world.”

  As they crossed to the parking lot, Quinton noticed that Regina had parked right next to him. It seemed even their cars liked one another’s company. The night was drawing to a close, and Quinton slowed his pace. Once they reached the cars they would have to say their good-nights, and he was not quite ready to do so yet. The longer this night lasted, the better.

  “Ya know. I’m not ready to go home. Do you dance?” Regina asked.

  “Country? Like last night at the Wagon Wheel?”

  “God, no! That music... That’s not my kind. I was thinking more like that,” the woman said as she pointed to a club a few doors down. Music pounded out of the building, driving and relentless.

  “There?” Quinton asked, a bit dubious of her choice.

  “We’re in central Oregon, remember? Got any better ideas?”

  Quinton did not, but neither was he in any hurry to enter that dark, crowded club. “It looks awfully... trendy.”

  “I know. That’s what is so perfect. We’re trying out the new us.” Regina suddenly sounded not so confident. “Aren’t we?”

  Not wanting Regina to be at all unsure of his intentions towards her, Quinton picked up her hand and strode over towards the club. “Absolutely.”

  The line was not too long, but it looked like the bouncer was being pretty strict about dress code. This must have been the sole upscale street in Queen’s Court. Quinton could only hope that his black jeans would get them bumped from the line. Given enough time, Quinton was sure that he could come up with something agreeable for both of them to do. The bouncer took one look at Quinton and gave them the thumb to leave, but Regina was fast. Suddenly, a hundred dollar bill appeared in the guy’s hand. There was a flash of a smile on the bald man’s face, then he lifted the rope and allowed them into the club.

  As they walked in, Quinton could not believe the woman’s audacity. “Regina!
That was a lot of money.”

  The woman squeezed his hand and leaned next to him so that she could be heard over the throbbing music. “Don’t worry. It was grocery money.” Regina’s lips curled up into a smile. “The kids won’t mind pizza for dinner next week.”

  The pounding noise nearly shook Quinton’s fillings. He watched the surging mass of dancers out on the floor. Quinton had not felt quite so old in a while. The young dancers threw themselves around the room with abandon, swaying to music no matter how suggestive that made them look. Quinton could not count the number of nose rings and eyebrow piercings.

  “Are you sure you really want to --”

  Regina gave his arm a tug towards the dance-floor. “I’m sure.”

  Quinton let her enthusiasm carry him out into the chaos. The music was loud and booming, and it was certainly not his kind of melody. He tried to pick up on the rhythm, but everyone seemed to be dancing to their own beat. Quinton felt completely self-conscious as he tried to look at least passable. Regina on the other hand was cutting loose. Her silky dress caressed her hips as the woman danced intensely. She seemed to almost be another person -- confident and self-assured.

  And was she singing along with the lyrics? Quinton tried to listen intently to the song, but could only make out a few words. Something about witches and burning and going up in smoke. The only musical genre Quinton could put it into was something akin to death rock, only with a semi-danceable beat.

  “You know this song?” Quinton shouted over the mayhem.

  Regina nodded as she lip-synched the words. When the song went into the screeching instrumental part, the woman came in close beside him and yelled in his ear. “It’s Rob Zombie.”

  “Rob Who?”

  Playfully, Regina snuggled up against him and got on her tip-toes to speak directly into his ear. Quinton was intensely distracted from her words as her lips brushed past his ear lobe. It was almost like a kiss but not quite.