Firebird Alex (The Sedumen Chronicles Book 1)

by Orren Merton

  Damnit, I should have remembered. He wanted to get out of his parent’s house, just like I did. I felt like I was being a bitch. “It’s okay, I didn’t mean to bring up—”

  “No, it’s cool, really. I don’t mind talking about it. I love my dad and my brother, you know? We get along great. But things have just been really…I dunno, heavy around the house since Mom’s disappearance. I felt like I had to get away. Is that wrong?” Jake asked, his expression almost pleading with me to absolve him from guilt.

  “It’s not wrong. I lost my mom too. And I feel the same. That’s why I’m staying with Rabbi Norm for a while.”

  “Aaaaah…it makes sense now,” Jake smiled. His whole face stretching out with the hugest, most inviting ear-to-ear grin I’d seen.

  “What makes sense?” I asked.

  “It was the rabbi who texted me you were here, and if I was around to offer you a ride home.”

  I huffed out a quick chuckle and shook my head. “Rabbi Hirsch, playing matchmaker again.”

  “Uh…oh.” And just like that, his joyful smile disappeared. “I thought…sorry,” Jake shrugged, fighting off the look of disappointment that was taking over his face.

  “Thought what? Tell me,” I prompted.

  “I thought…I thought you asked the rabbi to text me…”

  And just like that, I felt like an even bigger bitch. He barely knew me, and he’d already helped me out and was offering to help me again. I could tell that Jake had a great heart, and couldn’t help but feel drawn to him, even if he was too skinny. The last thing I wanted to do was to make him sad.

  “It’s not that I didn’t want you to meet me here,” I insisted. “It’s just that I didn’t know you were here, so I didn’t think of it. Would you like to sit at the table with me?”

  Jake looked a little happier. “Are you sure? I don’t want to impose or anything. I can tell you’re in the middle of something.”

  “I’m sure,” I said. “I’m just not used to talking…well, to anybody. I stick to myself. But especially guys.”

  “Really?” Jake pulled out the chair across from me and sat down. “How were you able to keep all the guys away from you?”

  “Huh?” I asked, probably too defensively. “What do you mean?”

  “You’re…” Jake swallowed his word nervously. He sat straight and started wringing his hands a bit. “You’re so pretty, Alex.”

  “Thanks,” I lowered my head, a bit self-conscious. “But I’m really shy, and like I said, I don’t really put myself out there.”

  “Trust me, guys notice extremely pretty girls, even if they’re shy and don’t talk. Shy boys get ignored. Shy girls? No way.”

  I could feel my cheeks getting red. It wasn’t just that I wasn’t used to compliments, it was the feeling that he really meant it.

  “Thanks again. But I didn’t get noticed. And when I did, well, I did my best to act like a bitch to scare anyone away. I don’t mean to do that to you though.”

  “You’re not being a bitch, you’re being really nice,” Jake smiled.

  “And by the way, shy boys do get noticed by the girls. You were in Mr. Green’s confirmation class, sitting third from the back on the left, all by yourself—”

  “Oh my God! Yes!” Jake practically fell out of his chair with excitement. “You remembered me! Yeah, I never had friends in religious school. I was, what, fourteen? Everyone was so worried with trying to be cool. I was always just dreaming, lost in my own head.”

  “Yeah,” I nodded. “That’s what I remembered. You were alone, but you looked…happy. I can remember times when you’d laugh or smile to yourself, like there was some private joke that only you were in on. I thought that was the coolest thing.”

  “Ha! I was actually the least cool boy in class,” he chuckled. “I still am, really. I couldn’t be cool if someone poured a bucket of it over my head.”

  I grinned. “Well, you’re talking to the least cool girl in the world, for what it’s worth.”

  “It’s worth everything,” Jake said. His mouth still had the same playful expression, but there was something serious in his eyes. I swear, I could get lost in those eyes….

  “So what are you looking up?” Jake asked.

  “Demons and folklore,” I said.

  “What do you mean you’re not cool? That’s super cool! Is this just for fun, or…” he trailed off.

  I looked at him intently. Could I trust him? How would he react to the truth? Would he flip out? Did he really want to know me…or just know that I was interested in him?

  I couldn’t put my finger on it, but something in his face was just so open, so genuine….Rabbi Norm said Jake was non-judgmental. Was that the rabbi’s way of saying that Jake could handle my secret? Perhaps that’s why the rabbi kept trying to push us together?

  What I did know was that it felt really good to have two people in the world who knew me—really knew me. It made me feel less alone in the world. And if Jake could handle my secret, that would make me feel even less alone. Maybe it was worth the risk….

  “Actually…I’m looking for my father in these books.”

  “Really?” Jake leaned forward with a look of admiration. “That rocks! My dad is an engineering manager at Hurricane Games; he’s got his name on a bunch of computer games, but not on any books. Did your dad write any of those?”

  “No,” I shook my head. “I mean…I’m looking for descriptions of him in the pages.”

  “Oh, sorry for the misunderstanding,” he said earnestly. “So your dad is a folklore expert?”

  “You don’t have to apologize. I know this is weird. I don’t expect people to understand, which is why I don’t talk about it. My dad…” I swallowed hard and closed my eyes. “My dad’s a demon. I’m seeing if they might have written what he’s like, so if I ever meet him, I’d have an idea what to expect.”

  I opened my eyes. As the words came out of my mouth, I cringed. They sounded absolutely insane. I’d probably just scared Jake away, and I had it coming.

  Jake nodded. “It’s not weird. I get it. I told you my dad designed games, right? He’s currently in charge of a team working on Starcon Frigate, but he’s worked on the fantasy role-playing games too. I’m mostly into first-person shooters and adventure games myself, but those RPGs can be so creative and social. I totally respect that. So I don’t misunderstand again, do you mean that your father is playing a demon, and you are looking up his character, or that your character has a demon father?”

  I sighed. We were in a public library, I was getting frustrated, but his willingness to accept that I was looking up demons was sort of sweet. So I hadn’t given up on telling Jake the truth, but it was going to have to wait.

  “It’s not like that, it’s complicated. I don’t want to get into it now. We can talk about it later though.”

  Jake swallowed. His expression became concerned. “Did I—”

  “I’m not mad,” I assured him. “It’s cool, really. I’m just not explaining it right. I need to find the words. It’s fine. I promise.”

  Jake nodded, visibly relieved.

  “Have you been here a while?” he asked. “Did you eat yet? If you haven’t, it’s about one now and I’d love to take you to lunch or something.”

  One o’clock? I was surprised it had been that long. “Oh…uh…yeah, I guess.”

  “Really, you don’t have—”

  “No,” I interrupted. “I would like to go to lunch with you. Like I said, I’m just not used to being asked…to go places with people. I’m not sure how I’m supposed to respond.”

  “I understand. And trust me, I’ve never been smooth a day in my life. That’s why I’m always too honest…I don’t know what else to do.”

  “Well, I like that about you, Jake.”

  He gazed deeply into my eyes and slowly smiled. I don’t think a guy had ever looked at me like that before. It felt weird, like I was under intense scrutiny but without any judgment. It made me a bit uncomfortable,
but I liked it.

  “Okay, let’s go,” he finally said. “Do you want me to check out these books for you?”

  “Oh…um, yeah, sure.”

  He closed the books that were open and picked them all up. “I’ll be happy to check out any books you want,” he told me as we walked to the check-out counter. “And do you like Chinese?”

  “I love Chinese!”

  7

  The closer we got to the student parking lot near the dorms, the bigger the bounce in Jake’s step. When we finally approached his car, he practically exploded with pride. It was a bit dorky but actually quite cute.

  “And here we are!” Jake beamed.

  “Cool. Yeah…I remember it from last week. It’s a…very nice car, Jake,” I said, barely repressing myself from giggling. “It’s a sports car?”

  Jake laughed as he opened the door for me. “Yeah, it’s a Subaru BRZ,” he grinned as he shut the door behind me, then walked around the car. He continued when he opened the driver’s side door and climbed in. “I don’t expect you to care, but hey, cars are a big deal to me.”

  He started the car and listened to the engine revving with a huge, satisfied grin.

  “Like I said, it’s a nice car. It looks all sleek and clean…the dashboard is all…glowy…” I couldn’t contain myself anymore and finally started giggling.

  “Look,” Jake turned to me, his huge grin letting me know that his feelings weren’t hurt and he was taking my attitude in stride. “I’m a computer science nerd, okay? I’m not into sports or drinking or being a ‘bro,’ you know? But I do like cars. That’s my one dude-like hobby!”

  He looked in the rear view mirror and started backing the car out of its parking space.

  I laughed. “I get it, I do. And I’m totally serious. It’s a nice car. A great car. I’m not making fun of you, really.”

  “Yes you are!” Jake threw me a good-natured thanks-for-saying-that-but-I-don’t-believe-you sideways glance as he drove out of the parking lot.

  “Okay…just a little,” I teased. “And I certainly don’t care if other guys think you’re a ‘dude’ or not.”

  Jake turned to me again as we were turning out onto Culver Street, this time with a look infused with gratitude—and something else.

  “I did so much research,” Jake said. “Into what I could get that had killer performance, while still having decent mileage so I would go easier on the environment. I paid for half of this car out of my savings and my salary doing Q&A testing for Hurricane Games, and my parents matched the rest.”

  “That was really cool of them,” I said. “And you picked a winner.”

  “I’ll stop talking about her before you never want to ride with me again,” Jake chuckled.

  “Her?” I raised my voice playfully. “The car is a her?”

  “Hey, she’s my Batmobile!” Jake smiled. “Although I haven’t named her. But I did trick out the stereo and did some other stuff as well.”

  “Okay. I thought it was another guy thing,” I grinned.

  “Like what, like I imagine my car is a hot sexy woman when I’m alone in bed or something?”

  “Not like that!” I laughed. “But like, I dunno, you and the guys would talk about your cars like they’re your chicks or something.”

  “Me and the guys,” Jake snickered. “I don’t have a lot of guy friends, to be honest. Really, not a ton of friends period. And we sort of scattered all over the country when we all got into college. The first thing I did when I got my car last year was take a road trip to San Francisco with my best friend Jillian, so she could meet her girlfriend for the first time.”

  “So your best friend is a girl named Jillian, who lives in San Francisco with her girlfriend?”

  “Close,” Jake said. “My best friend is a girl named Jillian who goes to UC Berkeley, majoring in social welfare. She had an online girlfriend in high school, who we went up to meet. They dated for a while when Jillian got to Berkeley, but it didn’t last. Jillian has another girlfriend now who is awesome.”

  “So you’re saying that your car is female because everyone important in your life is female,” I said.

  “Yeah,” Jake nodded. “It’s just where my head was at. I’m really, totally, not one of the ‘bros.’ I just like cars.”

  “Got it,” I nodded my head once for emphasis.

  “Just be glad I’m not talking to you about phreaking,” he grinned impishly.

  “Huh?” I asked, my defensiveness coming back.

  “Phone hacking. I told you, I’m a total computer geek. I get it from my dad. ‘Phreaking’ is hacking telecom systems with phone boxes, like they used to do. You thought I was talking about a sex thing, didn’t you?” Jake laughed maniacally.

  I felt a bit embarrassed, but Jake was in a good mood and clearly not judging me, so I didn’t feel too bad. “I told you, I usually avoid people. So I’m pretty inexperienced about what guys talk about.”

  “Okay, seriously, Alex,” Jake’s smile faded but retained its open, kind expression. “Why avoid people? Is it just that you’re insecure? Because you seem so smart and warm. You don’t have anything to be insecure about. At least with me.”

  Oh boy, I thought, here we go. Let’s try this again. “Thanks Jake. But it’s not just insecurity. Trust me, I’m completely different than other people. I’m not like them at all, and I don’t want them to find out.” I swallowed anxiously.

  “I’m not like other people either,” Jake shrugged as he turned down Jamboree Road. “So you’ll never need to be insecure around me.”

  I sighed heavily. Oh Jake, if you only understood….”That’s not what I mean,” I inhaled deeply. “I mean, that too—but I mean I’m…Jake…I’m not human. My father really is a demon.”

  Jake let out a long sigh. “You know, sometimes I forget how cool it is that I have such a great relationship with my parents. Well, parent now, I guess,” Jake said, swallowing back an obvious tinge of grief. “But whatever your dad is like, you’re still human.”

  I immediately felt bad for making him get sad about his mom again. But I really wanted to make him understand. I was getting frustrated, but I didn’t want to burn up his car by getting so upset that I flamed out in it.

  I took a deep breath. “Jake, I’m serious; my father was an actual demon.”

  Jake turned on the turn signal and started pulling toward the curb. What was going on? Did he finally get it, and he was throwing me out of the car? Did he hate me?

  He stopped the car and turned his whole upper body to face me. His eyes were glassy and red, tears welling in them.

  I inhaled quickly, afraid of what he’d say next.

  “Did he…” Jake took a deep breath. “Did he hurt you?”

  I exhaled. My frustration vanished, and I was left moved by how deeply the thought that I’d been abused upset him.

  “No no—I’m sorry,” I explained as soothingly as I could. “My dad never touched me. Mom made sure of that. Let’s just eat lunch, okay? We’ll talk about this later. I really need to figure out how to bring it up right. But Jake: thank you. It means a lot to me that you were concerned for me. Really.”

  Jake nodded, his eyes getting less red. “Any time you want to talk,” he said. “Whatever it is, I want to listen. I’m serious.”

  “I know,” I nodded. “And we will. Right now, Chinese is sounding really good.”

  “And we’re only a couple blocks away,” Jake said as he pulled back into traffic. “Mandarin Palace, right in that shopping center over there,” he lifted his hand from the steering wheel to point out the window at a parking lot up the road.

  “I see it. It’s not expensive is it?” I asked.

  “It isn’t. But it’s my treat anyway, so don’t worry,” Jake said.

  Mandarin Palace was not a large restaurant, but it wasn’t fast food either; white tablecloths, all the hot tea you could drink, and really, really good food. You could tell it was good because there were many Asians there for lunch, o
rdering in Chinese. This was not just a “Westernized” chain restaurant pretending to be ethnic. I had a fantastic Chicken Lo Mein, which I shared with Jake. He ordered Mongolian Beef, which he also shared with me.

  We kept the conversation light after the episode in the car. This may have been my first meal alone with a guy, but Jake was so easy to talk to that it felt like we’d known each other for a long time. He really listened and seemed interested, had a wicked-fast wit, and I never felt out of my depth. Even sharing food added to the experience and just felt right somehow. I’m not sure if Jake had planned this out, but it was really the perfect “first date.”

  “That was so good,” I smiled, pleasantly stuffed as we both finished eating. “Thank you so much for taking me here. This was really awesome.”

  “The pleasure is all mine, Alex,” Jake grinned back. “And I agree, this place is fantastic.”

  “It’s not right around UCI though,” I commented as the waitress took Jake’s credit card to pay for lunch.

  “No,” Jake said. And his eyes started to get a bit glassy again. “It was my mom’s favorite.”

  Oh geez. Jake had been so great to me, I really wanted to be there for him, but I didn’t want to make him sad. “She had great taste,” I said, hoping my smile was sympathetic enough.

  “She really did,” he agreed, his eyes getting redder.

  I thought for a moment before speaking, saying the words in my head before I spoke them. I didn’t want to screw this up. “Jake, if you don’t want to talk about this, I totally understand. Sometimes I don’t want to talk about my mom either. But if you want to talk, I want to listen.”

  “Thanks Alex. I mean it,” he said softly. He quickly dabbed his eyes on his napkin.

  “My mom…she…she’s dead,” he blurted out. It was as if the words took him by surprise. He nodded, almost as if he was convincing himself. “She’s dead.”

  “Are you sure?” I asked.

  He looked at me and inhaled deeply. “I am. But they can’t officially pronounce her dead, because they haven’t found her body. So the Irvine Police have her as a missing person, presumed dead.”