Dead End Stories From the End of the World
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Constant fear, very nearly true terror, warred with a sense of duty, and the knowledge that it was all futile. A large part of him was making an incredible effort to keep him from killing himself. That was normal, but the alterations to his neural physiology had become greater since the last time they'd been checked. By him at least. Tess would have done a daily check on him.
They didn't believe in personal violence as a people, the Technologists. Not that anyone left in the world would ever think that was true again. This entire mess was really about him having refused to kill a few people, back when it might have made a real difference. So now so many more had to pass on.
It was a miracle that Jake didn't go on a killing spree, or at least terminate his own life. It showed something that their numbers hadn't counted on at all. Some secret that their science, which was much greater than what the rest of humanity had known about, hadn't managed to catch or measure yet. It was, in a very real way, almost as if his very soul was influencing him to live. To fight and keep going, no matter how much the world beat him down.
That was impossible of course. The human soul wasn't truly capable of that level of action. Its effects had been well measured and were understood. There it was though. In this one body, thin to the point of true starvation, bedraggled and weary already, even if it was still early in the day, a soul burned like fire that propped him up.
That, of course, would end up being a problem. He couldn't harm Jake. Even if he were willing to, Burt doubted that direct means would be survivable or effective. There were some weapons that could be set on the man that no one could survive, of course. Except that knowing a person or being would die because of your actions was wrong, and counter to efficient mental health. So that wouldn't be happening. Even if it meant that they lost in the end.
Really, it was a sign that he was the wrong person for the job. He always had been.
What was needed was a good old fashioned killer. A soldier perhaps could have managed the work. A scientist that knew how wrong destruction tended to be, when not balanced by an equal level of creation though? That was a thing that would eventually lead to a mistake being made.
Looking at the man move with energy he didn't really have into The House, in order to help save them all. Again, Burt thought he understood exactly what that was.
Unlike the rest of the world, his team hadn't believed in the power held inside one simple man.
Jake wasn't that at all however. He was something more than the sum of his parts.
Maybe they all were.
If that was the case, then what they'd done was even worse than they'd thought. In their science blinded eyes, they missed the true spark of divine that lived in everyone.
Then snuffed it out.
Like fools.
Blood and Water- Alan Sims
"Okay." There was a pause as the woman in front of him looked around furtively. Carley was about the last person he wanted to sleep with, so there wasn't a lot of interest in helping her do anything really. It was more that he wanted to avoid her if he could, than lack of personal interest though. "I'll go with you to get more wood, I guess. It's not my favorite thing, but hey, what else do I have to do?"
That wasn't the real reason he was going though. It wasn't even about the off chance that he could hit that fine piece of ass that Carley had hinted at. She wouldn't deliver after all. Her kind never did.
Killgrade women were all like that.
He should know. It was why he'd left Homecore. That she didn't recognize him wasn't all that big of a deal, even though they'd been children together. For years they'd gone to the same school. They'd also dated once, in grade ten. That was when they were both fourteen, so it hadn't moved beyond a kiss on the cheek goodnight. That she didn't remember him...
It wasn't an issue. Most of the Killgrade men were kind of looked down on. Thought weak and powerless by the ladies. That wasn't the truth, of course.
They were too powerful. They did sicken and die easily, but that was because their systems over-produced the viral loads they incorporated just from being in the world. If they could let that specific thing out in a safe environment, they would all have been fine. So they weren't taught that.
Instead they were told they were wimps. The weaker sex. Then hammered into that mold with constant reinforcement, so that, like an elephant chained as a baby, they'd give up and learn to never try to survive.
Alan had. It was when he was a teen that he'd worked out what was going on. That the bacterial and chemical components of his being were fine, but he needed to release the viral load on occasion. About once every six months. It wasn't some huge thing, really. The trick was just getting away from everyone to a place that wouldn't risk anyone finding for about a week, to make sure that all the harmful agents were dead.
The woods could work well enough for that, as long as he didn't get bitten. Not because he could be turned into one of the dead. That was silly. He'd been bitten sixteen times already. No, it was all about the fact that since he'd come to The House, Jake had killed almost everyone that had a bite on them.
Oh, now that Carley had proved that some of them could get around that sort of thing he could explain it. Most likely. What he really didn't want was for the blonde man-killer next to him to realize who he was. She'd flip on him and probably try to make him go back. To protect him. Like he was some kind of pet or property. Not someone special and beloved. Just a person that was useful in regards to making babies.
Second class didn't really explain it though.
It was better out in the real world.
Rubbing his bearded face he tried to look scared. The rest of the regular people were. Not that any of them were exactly normal. The closest they got was probably... No one came to mind.
Even the new kids were all a bit strange. Oh, maybe they didn't get superpowers, but they were all quiet and focused. All the time. Especially the ones that had been there for a while. The Bawdri and her little berserker friend. Ken.
He was about it, wasn't he? As close to a standard human as they had now.
Alan wouldn't have gotten in a fight with him for his life though. Not because the young teen would have won. That might happen, but probably wouldn't. Al could knock a person out in about fifteen seconds if it came to it, without ever touching them. No, it was that The Very Good Man would have been disappointed in him. That was more than he could bear right now.
That one hadn't taken him by surprise when he'd heard it. A lot of people there had acted like they didn't know, or that Jake was some kind of monster that couldn't be the one. As if it hadn't been clear the whole time who he was?
It was, clearly, the end of the world. Probably with capital letters on it. The big nothing to follow with endless void coming after for as long as anyone could see. Death had come for the world. Literally. So of course he was there. It was about the most natural thing possible. The final song was being played, and this place was clearly the center of it all.
So one of them pretty much had to be him. Or her, as the case might be.
Carley actually clapped him on the arm. It was clear that it took work for her to do, because she thought he was just some human guy. A target, not someone to risk bonding with.
"That's one then. I don't suppose you have some friends you could work up for it? It's like pulling nose hairs." That was a Killgrade turn of phrase. One that would have given her away even if she hadn't been someone he knew personally. Then everyone here knew about her, so it was all right for her to be strange. Just not him.
"Maybe. Do we get guards?"
There was a shrug and a pat to the gun on her hip. He'd never really played with any of those. A bit of rifle work, but nothing too deep that way.
"I have this. I don't suppose you want to be the other guard? I'll make it worth your while..." She pretended to flirt. It was a thing that all the girls learned in school how to disarm a target emotionally.
Not able to help himself, Alan snorted.
"That transparent? I'm not a risk that way. I don't go around killing people. Honest."
That got a shrug.
"But does that get me laid? Hmm? Don't hint at it if you don't mean it."
That got her to look away, since it was pretty clear that she'd been caught out. It had been her plan after all. Lead him on, get what she wanted, and not deliver on the goods. Not that she was that special. She was cute. Pretty really. All of their women were. Alan really would have rather slept with the ugliest woman in the place. In fact, he had, several times. She was a sweetheart.
It wasn't that Carley was a horrible woman. Not for one of their people. No, honestly she'd grown a lot in the last months. After her breakdown, where she hid in the cellar for about a week, the woman had come back seeming...
Nearly kind.
Then she kept doing it. If only the rest of them, the other Killgrade women, could have done the same. Then, maybe it could happen now? Most of the targets, human men, were dead. There was no reason for them to not shake things up now. Not that he was convinced that it would happen.
They locked eyes for a moment. Blue to blue. After a second he nodded. It was a good plan. If he could get a guard position, he could walk a spiral, which would be a good reason to get far enough away to do a full release. Not that he had to do it yet. He could last years if he had to. It would just start to wear on him if he couldn't clean his holding system out.
"I can get that done. I'll need to check out a rifle, since I can't hit the broad side of a barn with a handgun, I don't think. Let me see if I can work some people up for this though. What is it for?"
She hadn't really mentioned that part. They were getting logs, but that was all she'd said. He'd already signed up, so it seemed fair enough to ask.
The woman blushed. Not that it was impossible for one of their kind, but it normally was an indication they were about to go into a full release. Dumping everything they had that could kill, maim, hurt or distract another person all at one time. That indicated rage or fear however. For a moment he wondered what was going on, until she stammered a response.
She actually hemmed and hawed.
It was adorable, and better, seemed real.
"It's for Jake. He wants more charcoal for the forge. Wanted more. When he gets back we could have it ready for him?" She sounded almost shy.
Like she expected him to claim that Jake had abandoned them the week before, rather than just gone on a trip. Some had mentioned that. Most of them feeling scared by the idea.
Alan wasn't one of them though. The man would give up on humanity and the others when he died, perhaps, but only then. It was so painfully clear that was the case that he almost wondered how stupid everyone else actually could be.
"Good. He'll be back. I've heard people talking, but let's not jump on that boat? He's the..." This was the hard part. If he were a real human, he wouldn't call Jake a Very Good Man. They called the whole thing something different. "Messiah. We just need to keep things going here while he's out. Besides, having a guard now is almost a joke, Zombie wise. We really need to keep an eye out for cannibals and stupid thieves. You get the idea. The ones too slow to understand they could just come here and ask for things?"
She nodded, even if it wasn't really true. They could come, but just walking up to the place was a bad idea now. People would try to kill you, if they had the chance. They were more scared of new faces than anything else now.
The woman touched his arm again.
"That's right." It was patronizing, but he didn't let that show. She held the contact and didn't move away. "So you don't think that we'll all be killed for our tender flesh out there? Turned into steaks?"
That wasn't going to happen. In fact, if he'd gotten to the main room a little sooner, Alan could have kept Sammi and Barb from being taken when they had been. It wasn't precise, and everyone in the room would have woken with a headache, but he could have done it. It might have saved some lives.
He would have, he decided, not really knowing if that was the case. It was always easy to proclaim yourself tough and strong after you were safe. What you did in the moment was most often a reflection of who you really were inside. He was, deep down, very afraid. Still, in his world that meant releasing a combination of powerful stunning compounds. It may have happened even if he wasn't brave or strong.
That was enough.
One thing that he'd learned from all of this, was that being a hero wasn't the job for him.
"Steaks? I doubt it. We'd make better burgers. That's the best thing to do with lean meat. So, anyway..." He glanced down at her arm and shrugged. "I'll get on that now. So... Do you want to get together later, or are you really just trying to be friendly... and botching it that badly?"
It was blunt, and teasing, but that worked now, with almost everyone. If he'd walked up to Carl, one of the straightest men there, and asked for a blowjob, he probably would have done it. Not that he would. There were a lot of women, and he actually did like them. Even Carley. He just didn't trust her.
Yet.
She stiffened then, but didn't drop her hand from his arm. It was nearly like she wanted to say that she'd do something, even if a man had asked her. That was a big problem for their people. The women. They initiated sex, or it didn't happen. That she'd been caught in Derrick's pheromone cloud was interesting, though it made sense. She'd started to like him, and then simply decided that it was of her own volition, Alan was willing to bet. It had happened before he'd gotten there, or he could have gotten her to realize it was happening sooner. Still, that was a handy trick, influencing anyone that strongly.
Alan had picked it up from Carley, when she'd taken the women that had betrayed them as slaves. It was a strong thing, but she wasn't that great at targeting. Women weren't. They just moved in, and sprayed whatever agent they were working with at the moment.
Men had better control that way as a rule. They were more focused when it came to any sort of release.
"Um..." It was so clear that she wanted to say no that he nearly jumped when she got the next bit out. "Yeah. Let's do that. No anal though. You get that, right? My control isn't that great all the time when I get hurt, and I don't want to accidently kill everyone in the room with us."
She didn't add anything about what she meant, even though it was pretty much common knowledge that she was a Killgrade. Cameron the skallawagga... The Sh'elle'erid girl, had gone around explaining about all of the other groups to anyone that wanted to know. It had been useful, since her people, who got around pretty well, had a lot more information than his did that way.
"Oh? That's a bit lame then. I mean, I'm not really into that kind of thing, but not being in better control of yourself is kind of embarrassing, isn't it? If you stub your toe do you release great clouds of death too?" He smiled and patted her on the arm. She'd just said she was willing to sleep with him after all. That was...
Big. For her. To someone with her upbringing saying yes when he asked was pretty much like taking away her power outright.
That was why he pushed her. If she wasn't going to snap at him for pointing that out, then she might be worth spending time with now. Maybe not. He didn't hold his breath, but she didn't turn red either.
"It's not that bad. It's... A bit embarrassing really. That, letting a man do that kind of thing to me, and it hurting at the same time... could get me going. So, if you still want to? You not being into that kind of thing that much anyway? Then I can get rid of part of this reputation I have of being a tease. It's a cultural thing. You know how that is." There was eye rolling, but no significant look to go with it.
He nodded, but felt a bit suspicious anyway. It was like she was hinting that she did remember him. That was... Possible. Even with a beard it was pretty clear that he was better looking than most of the other men the
re. It was a family trait, having fine and refined features. Great skin, too. Acne wasn't an issue for them, being immune to the bacterial infections that made it a lot worse for regular people.
Rather than play coy, or act like she might not get it, Alan cleared his throat. He wasn't going back now, so did it really matter what she said? Carley didn't have the power to order him to do anything here. Here he wasn't a second class person. Or, well he was, since he'd mainly been one of the inside people for a while. It had been safer, since Jake would have shot him if he'd gotten a bite. Now that was safer though.
Even more so if people knew he was immune.
"I do. Of course. Killgrade women all have an issue about being asked for sex. As if saying yes means they're weak. Prey, to the men they're supposed to kill. It's ridiculous of course. Still, you should work on your control. I can show you how, if you want?" He grinned, realizing that something that was just said shocked her from the look she gave him.
"I... Don't think I get it. That's right, I mean. I know that we kind of have a messed up relationship with men, and that it's not right, but how do you know?"
It was his turn to roll his eyes then. She really didn't have a clue about him, did she? Then, really, he got that. Looking down at himself, his normal if slightly thin body, his tall and strong frame that made him nearly six feet, nearly a giant for a Killgrade man, he took a breath.
It was time for him to come clean, he thought. It would probably be a mistake, but it had been lonely. For a lot longer than it seemed like. No one he'd known since he left Homecore had been safe to share who and what he was with.
"I learned, when I was about thirteen, before we had that one date, how to get rid of the buildup that was making me weak and sick. It's just a controlled viral dump. It takes a few seconds, twice a year. I'm a bit taller than I used to be. Alan?" Holding a hand out he touched her hand and put out a thin stream of a rather harmless chemical from his hand, that made hers tingle on contact. It was a numbing agent to humans and most of the other groups, but it worked well enough for signaling what he was.