The dinner seemed to last forever; but just when I thought the torture was finally over, my mom dropped the bombshell.
“I have a surprise for you guys!” She glanced at Ava’s dad like they were sharing a big secret. “Your Dad and I saved your best gift for last.”
I had a sinking feeling that this wasn’t going to be good. The announcement had caught Ava’s attention, too. We both waited.
“We booked a 7-day family vacation at Widow’s Peak Ski Resort. Remember how much you two used to love it there? You used to ski from sunup to sundown. I got slope-side lodging for us, so you two can ski whenever you want.”
She paused for a moment. “Now, I know with your schedules, you might not be able to go all seven days, but I’m sure you can get some time off. It’ll be a nice family vacation. Just like old times.”
Maybe my mother was being willfully ignorant; because there was no way she couldn’t see the forced and blatantly false enthusiasm that Ava and I half-heartedly faked.
Chapter 18
AVA
I was nervous. How was I going to get through five hours of being trapped in a car and four days of being trapped at a ski resort with Cole? The two months since our horrible Christmas revelation hadn’t dulled the pain or humiliation one little bit. I hadn’t seen him or talked to him since then; it was the only thing that had kept me sane and functioning.
The only way that I could cope was to never think about what happened, even for a second. Denial was my friend, because I had a sinking suspicion that if I actually examined my feelings, I was going to unpack some really sick shit.
I had tried to get out of the family vacation. My efforts led to Marissa asking me if there was something going on between Cole and me. I had panicked. Of course, she probably just thought it was sibling bickering, but I was paranoid. I was convinced that if I didn’t go, she might get suspicious.
In the end, I pretended that my work schedule was getting in the way – that I’d only be able to get away for four days instead of the whole week. Well, that backfired. It turned out that it ‘worked out perfectly because Cole was driving up to the resort on Friday and he could drive you up’. I couldn’t twist out of it without sounding like a fool.
My parents had already been gone for two days when Cole came by my house to pick me up. As soon as I saw him, I was pissed. He acted completely normal – like the whole incident never happened. Even worse, he looked devastatingly handsome in his ass-hugging jeans, snow boots and black thermal top that stretched tightly over his broad chest. Why did my stomach have to fill with butterflies every damn time I saw him?
I met him outside on the porch; my bags were already lined up and waiting near the driveway.
“How many fucking bags do you have? They’re not all going to fit. Jeez, Ava, we’re only going to be there for a few days.”
I ignored him. Didn’t he remember that I didn’t want to talk to him? Like ever.
It was freezing outside, so I jumped into the passenger seat of his car and waited for him to finish messing around with my suitcases. Of course I had a lot of bags, sweaters were damn bulky. So were ski clothes.
A few minutes later, he opened the driver’s door and held up one of my bags, a huge canvas tote. “Do you really need this one? It’s not fitting.”
I glared at him. “If I didn’t need it, I wouldn’t have packed it.”
He looked inside it. “It’s a bunch of boots. Why the hell do you need so many?”
Certain boots went with certain outfits, but I sure as hell wasn’t going to justify anything to him. “Just jam it in somewhere.”
My feet were already resting on a case of beer, so I couldn’t squeeze it in by me.
Cole sighed and slipped into the car, pulling the bag with him. “I guess it can go here.” He set it on the console between us.
“Fine.”
He started up the car and I noticed his keychain. The keychain. Fucking great. Just what I needed, a reminder of how much I should be embarrassed for the next five hours while I was stuck in the car with him.
Neither of us spoke for a long time.
“Ava.” It was a statement and a question all at once.
My insides twisted, “Don’t even,” I warned.
More miles flew by.
Cole glanced my way. “Ava…”
“Cole, I’m serious.” I squirmed in my seat. “I don’t want to talk about it. Ever.”
His fingers squeezed tightly around the steering wheel. “We can’t just keep pretending it never happened.”
I looked out the side window. “Why the hell not? That’s exactly what we should keep doing.”
He was quiet for a few minutes. “I know it’s… awkward.”
“Awkward! What the fuck, Cole?” I shot a glance his way. “It’s like the worst, most fucked up thing in the whole world.”
Cole grunted in reply.
Why did he have to be so calm about this? Why did he have to make me so mad? “You know I hate you, right? You’ve practically ruined my life.”
I scored a hit with that one. Cole clenched his jaw. He had no reply. I knew it wasn’t fair, but I wanted to hurt him. It wasn’t very mature, but dammit, I was hurting.
At least another thirty minutes passed in silence. I had almost been lulled into a false sense of security. Maybe he had given up. Maybe if we pretended hard enough, it would all just go away.
“What the hell were you thinking? Going to a sex club?” he growled in a raw angry way. “I could strangle you.”
I answered bitterly, “Oh, that’s rich. Look who’s talking! You were the one working at the sex club. As a Dom!”
He didn’t have a reply.
I couldn’t let it go. “I can only imagine what you were doing with all those women.” I regretted it as soon as it was out of my mouth.
Finally, I was getting some reaction. He looked pretty miserable.
“It’s not what you’re thinking. It was just play-acting. I needed the money.”
His words slammed through me like a ton of bricks. It was just play-acting. He had just been doing a job, but for me it was always something more. I had turned it into something more. And we both knew it.
I concentrated hard on the scenery outside my side window. A hard lump had lodged in my throat and tears were stinging my eyes. I couldn’t let him see me cry.
“Christ, Ava!” Cole slammed his fist on the steering wheel. “I can’t even look at you anymore without seeing… Fuck!”
Oh God. He was remembering all the stuff that we did. I thought I would die right on the spot.
My voice sounded desperate. “Please, Cole. Can we just forget it ever happened?”
This time when Cole looked at me, there was hunger in his eyes. My body’s reaction was immediate - heat bloomed between my legs and a needy ache pulsed in my pussy. My breath caught.
“What’re we going to do, Ava?”
What was he remembering right now? Sucking my tits? How he’d fingered my pussy? How many times he had made me come? How I had begged him? Oh my God, I had sucked his cock! The mortification knew no bounds. It was endless.
I groaned and sunk lower into my seat. “Oh my God, Cole.”
“I know.”
I could only imagine what he was thinking, that had him agreeing so heartily with me.
I sneaked a peek in his direction. He was shifting in his seat, adjusting his pants. “Oh my God, Cole! Do you have wood?”
“Fuck off, Ava.”
~~
Cole had flipped on the radio, and we drove the rest of the way in silence. When we got to the resort, I laid down some ground rules.
“So, the plan is we’re going to completely ignore each other, but remain polite when necessary, so that Mom and Dad don’t’ get suspicious.”
Cole gave me a sideways look. He seemed annoyed again. “Suspicious of what? That we did the nasty? I don’t think that’s on their radar.”
I huffed, exasperated. “That’s what I�
�m talking about. Don’t ever mention that again. Not ever. And just stay away from me while we’re here. You go your way, and I’ll go mine. Just keep away from me.”
The muscle in his jaw was working again. “Fine.”
Cole jumped out of the car, grabbed his few bags and disappeared into our ski condo. I guess I had to lug in my huge bags by myself. All ten million of them. Bastard.
I grabbed a few bags and hauled them inside. The place was small. Cozy. Ugh. No one greeted me; Marissa and Dad must have gone out. I rolled my suitcase toward the bedrooms. I saw Cole’s bags sitting on a queen-sized bed in the first tiny bedroom. The next bedroom was unoccupied. Of course, it was the bedroom with the kid’s bunk beds. Double Ugh.
I sat down on the edge of the bed, ducking my head to fit under the top bunk. The room was so tiny I wasn’t even sure if I could fit all of my luggage inside it. Of course, we were sharing a bathroom again. I didn’t even want to see how tiny that was.
I made a few more trips out to the car, trudging through the snow that was everywhere, while Cole sat on the sofa in front of the gas fireplace drinking a beer. He watched me coming in and out, struggling with my heavy bags, but didn’t say a word.
When I was finally finished, I looked around the place. Where was my parent’s bedroom? A sinking feeling developed in the pit of my stomach.
I walked out to the sitting room, hands on my hips. “Cole, where is Mom and Dad’s room?”
Cole smiled. It was a smile that I recognized – one he used when he knew he was being particularly naughty. “Adjoining rooms.” He pointed to a side door I hadn’t noticed. “Convenient, huh?”
My heart began thumping loudly in my chest. I was suddenly nervous. And excited. It was so damn confusing.
“They left a note on the table.” Cole took a sip of his beer and then returned to ignoring me.
I let out my pent up breath and then found the note.
We went out to dinner – wasn’t sure what time you were getting in. Left some pizza in your refrigerator if you’re hungry. Don’t wait up for us.
Love, Mom and Dad.
There was no way I was going to sit around all night with Cole. The thought of cozying up to the fire with him was… well… I had to escape. I returned to my room and pulled on my warmest boots. I found some knit gloves, a hat and scarf and slipped them on along with my ski jacket. I grabbed my wallet and pulled out my credit card, sliding it into the back pocket of my jeans.
From what I remembered as a kid, the walk to the quaint ski village wasn’t too far. But it was cold outside, the temperature probably in the single digits with the wind chill factored in. I slipped quietly out of the unit; Cole didn’t even seem to notice.
I was wrong. The walk was considerably farther than I remembered. In places, I had to navigate through the deep snow, at least a foot on the ground. The wind seemed to be slicing right through my jacket, and my nose was dripping like nuts. I was pretty miserable. Fifteen minutes in, I wished that I had sucked it up and asked to borrow Cole’s car.
When I saw the lights of the tiny village up ahead, I was so happy. I trekked down the road, passing quaint shops, looking for the familiar sign with the pitcher of beer below two crossed skis. I was frozen solid when I stomped inside of the Snow Bar. I had never been there before, but it looked to be friendly enough and it was warm.
I began stripping my gloves and hat off as I made my way to the bar. I needed a drink. The place was packed with people, some who looked like they had just stepped off a ski trail and some who looked showered and dressed to go out for the night.
A single barstool was open at the far corner of the bar. I weaved through the rowdy crowd and claimed the barstool. I shrugged off my bulky coat and stuffed it in a nearby corner.
It took a while for the bartender to notice me. When he finally did, I ordered a beer and a platter of nachos. I was starving, but I didn’t want to spend a lot of money on food. The prices were ridiculous.
The beer came right away, and I was starting to thaw out. Everyone around me was having a good time. My dark mood was lifting. Basketball games were playing on just about every TV in the room.
I didn’t know much about basketball. Cole had played football and lacrosse in high school. I had been to most of his games until it started to become too painful to watch him flirting with girls. He was a popular jock.
I took a huge sip of beer to try to clear my brain. Why was I thinking about Cole? I was never going to think about him again. The waiter interrupted my thoughts serving my plate of nachos, and I quickly ordered another beer before he walked away.
I was starting to feel pretty good when I was on my third beer, even a little buzzed. I was a complete lightweight when it came to alcohol, so I was usually pretty careful. I had a long walk home, so I decided that this would be my last one.
When a cute guy pushed up to the bar next to me, trying to get the bartender’s attention, I felt chatty. I was definitely feeling the effects of the beer. “This is a bad spot if you want to catch him.”
He turned to me and checked me out before he smiled. “Hmm. Maybe not such a bad spot after all. Are you here alone?”
I couldn’t deny to myself that I was starved for attention. Having a guy show interest in me was a stroke to my ego that I badly needed. “Well, I’m skiing for the week with my parents. But, yes, I’m alone here tonight.”
“That’s awesome.” The guy tried to get the bartender’s attention again. “I’m with a bunch of friends over there.” He pointed to a small group of people in the back. “You want to hang out?”
My sensible side was definitely telling me to say no. “I don’t know…”
The bartender approached and the guy ordered, “Give me a Jager Bomb. Actually, make that two – one for my friend, here.”
“Ava.” I smiled at him. My slightly drunken side was telling me that he was cute. Why should I deny myself a little fun? “My name’s Ava.”
Suddenly, he gave me the full force of his smile. “I’m Ian.”
A few seconds later, the bartender arrived with our drinks. My brows knitted in concentration. The bartender had slid two drinks in front of me – a glass of beer and a shot. “What’s this?”
Ian laughed at my confusion. “It’s a Jager Bomb. Have you ever done one before?”
I shook my head. “No. What do you do?”
Ian picked up his shot glass. “You drop the shot glass into the tall glass and then drink it down as fast as you can. It doesn’t taste too bad because it mixes. Here watch me.”
Ian slid his shot glass slowly inside the tall glass of beer and then let it drop. The two liquids started to splutter and foam as they mixed, but he was already chugging it down.
He set the glass down with a thud when he was done and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “Your turn.”
Giggling, I picked up the shot glass. “Okay, here goes.”
I slid the shot glass into the larger glass and then fumbled to pick it up and bring it to my mouth as quickly as I could. I watched as the dark liquid from the shot glass headed for my mouth, but by the time it reached my lips it had mixed with the beer - except it didn’t taste like beer at all.
I kept drinking and drinking. It was an awfully big drink. I could feel some of the cold liquid escape the corner of my mouth and drip down my chin. It felt like an eternity of drinking, until I had finished it.
“Look, I did it!” I slammed the glass down in triumph, a little too forcefully.
Ian’s finger wiped the wet spot on my chin. “You’re adorable.”
I was grinning at him like a fool. Whether it was from the alcohol or not, I didn’t care; I was having fun. More fun than I’d had since graduation – almost a year earlier.
Ian managed to catch the bartender’s eye and ordered two beers. He turned to me while he waited. “C’mon over and hang out with me and my friends.”
“Okay.” I hopped off the barstool. “First I need to use the ladies’ room. I’l
l find you when I’m out.”
I headed to the back of the crowded room where I thought the bathrooms might be located. When I made it into the relatively quiet space of the bathroom stall, I realized that at some point, I had definitely moved beyond tipsy, and whatever that shot was – it was only just starting to take effect.
A burst of laughter escaped my mouth as I struggled to pull my pants down in the cramped bathroom stall. Okay, mental note made: no more alcohol for the night.
When I was finished in the bathroom, I headed back out to the main bar area, anxious to find Ian again. I shrugged off the tiny little voice inside my head that was trying to whisper warnings to me. I could barely hear that voice; I was having too much fun.
I caught a glimpse of Ian across the room, so I was headed in that direction when a steely grip caught my arm. It spun me halfway around, almost causing me to lose my balance. My nose bumped into a solid male chest.
I looked up, feeling distinctly dizzy from my half-spin, and saw Cole. I frowned. “What are you doing here? Are you following me?”
“Don’t flatter yourself. This just happens to be the only bar in town.”
I shrugged out of his grip. “Well, it’s a free country, I guess.” - except it came out as, “I guessshh.” I was slurring my words! Oops.
Cole’s eyes narrowed as he studied me. “Are you drunk?”
“Nope.” Why couldn’t I stop the giggle that bubbled up after my answer?
He clearly didn’t believe me. “C’mon, Ava. I’ll take you back.”
“I don’t wanna go back. I’m hanging out with some frenzzz. Friends, I mean.”
I could see that Cole was about to dig in and force me to return with him, but I wasn’t about to let him ruin my fun. Before he could stop me, I slipped away through the crowd and headed towards Ian and his group of friends.
Ian was happy to see me and handed me a beer when I rejoined him. Naturally, the alcohol had loosened me up a bit, but I think it was Cole’s presence that had me acting even more forward with Ian than usual. Even though I had already decided not to drink anymore, I found myself downing the new beer pretty rapidly. I was totally aware that Cole was watching my every move the entire time and I was putting on a show for him.
My Stepbrother the Dom (Stepbrother Romance) Page 9
