Hit Or Myth

by Robert Asprin

  "Say that again, Aahz."

  "I said, 'it's a good...' Oh."

  "From the Deveels, right?"

  "Oh come on, Skeeve. It's just a house. What could be wrong?"

  "To use your phrase, 'The mind boggles.' I've been trying to spot the catch, and I want you to check me to see if my facts and logic are correct."

  "Okay."

  "Now. Deveels are experts at dimension travel. If I understand it right, they manage these 'bigger inside than outside' houses by offsetting the dimensions just a bit. That is, if we numbered the dimensions, and Deva was one, then our door is in dimension one and the rest of our house is in dimension one point four or something."

  "Now that's one I hadn't thought about before," Aahz admitted. "The Deveels have been pretty tight-lipped about it. Makes sense, though. It would be rough to play the poverty-stricken shop owner with a place like this just over your shoulder. If I had thought about it I would have realized a Deveel needs someplace secret to keep his wealth."

  "So we've effectively been given our own dimension," I continued; "An unlisted dimension that's all ours. For free, no less."

  "That's right," Aahz nodded, but there was a note of doubt in his voice now.

  "What I wonder about is how many of these offset dimensions do the Deveels have access to, and why is this particular one standing vacant? What's in this dimension?"

  "Our house?" my mentor suggested tentatively.

  "And what else?" I urged. "I've noticed there are no windows. What's outside our back door that the Deveels were so eager to give away?"

  "Backdoor?"

  I pulled away the tapestry to reveal the door I had spotted during our first tour. It was heavy wood with strange symbols painted on it. It also had a massive beam guarding it, and several smaller but no less effective-looking locks around the edge.

  "I tried to say something at the time, but you kept telling me to shut up."

  "I did, didn't I."

  We both stared at the door in silence for several minutes.

  "Tell you what," Aahz said softly. "Let's save investigating this for another day."

  "Right," I agreed, without hesitation.

  "...And until we do, let's not mention this to the others."

  "My thoughts precisely."

  "...And, partner?"

  "Yes, Aahz?"

  "If anyone knocks at this door, don't answer unless I'm with you."

  Our eyes met, and I let the tapestry fall back into place.