by L. C. Davis
"No way, man, I'll drive you," Thomas said, snatching them out of the alpha's hand before he could protest. Benjamin nodded and followed Thomas to his car. The drive seemed endless and passed in silence, but by the time Lita's number showed up on the screen, they were already outside the emergency room. Benjamin answered, rushing into the building just as Lita answered.
"Where are you?"
"I'm in the --" Benjamin had no sooner heard his sister's voice through the phone than he saw her across the room. She rushed to him, throwing her arms around him and breaking down in sobs, as if she had been waiting the entire time to do so. "It's daddy, Benjamin. He was tired one moment and then he was on the floor, and --" Her voice broke off as he choked.
"I know," Benjamin murmured, holding her tight. He looked around the mostly empty waiting room and saw no sign of his mother. "Where's mom?"
"She's back with him," Lita sniffed. "She told me to stay out here and wait for you."
Benjamin nodded, relieved. "You sit down, I'll be right back," he said, settling Lita in a chair and draping his jacket over her shoulders before he went to the nurse's station.
"Excuse me, but do you have any information on my father? His name is Heinrich Stillwater."
The petite blonde woman looked down at a chart on her desk. "He's in the ICU. All I can tell you is that they're treating him for a stroke, but I'll have someone come tell you as soon as we know anything."
Benjamin gave a curt nod, collecting himself before he went back over to sit with Lita.
"Any news?" she asked, her voice cracking.
"No, not yet," he said, putting a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "He'll be fine."
He could tell she didn't believe him, of course, but he didn't believe his own words, either. As they sat together in silent anticipation of the worst, Benjamin felt more helpless than he ever had and his role as Alpha only made him more keenly aware that he was now the one responsible for giving reassurance to his pack, even though he had enough trouble grasping it for himself.
The automatic doors slid open and Lita was on her feet before Benjamin could process the fact that Zane was standing there or understand how. "Zane!" she cried, running into his arms. Zane held her close and looked around before they both walked over to join Benjamin.
"I came as soon as I heard what happened," said Zane.
"How?" Lita asked, echoing Benjamin's confusion. "I thought you were at work."
"I was," Zane said, looking between them. Benjamin could feel the panic emanating from the alpha and knew it well as it had so recently ben his own. "I just had a feeling something was wrong and when you didn't answer your phone, I came home. No one was home and Karen told me what happened, so I came here."
"Thank you," Lita murmured, burying her face in Zane's chest as he stroked her hair.
Zane looked up at Benjamin. "How is he?"
"We don't know anything yet," said Benjamin, clearing his throat. "Just that he's stable, but that could mean a lot of things."
"Is there anything I can do?"
"You being here is enough," said Lita.
"I passed a coffee shop on my way in," said Zane. "Let me at least grab you guys something to drink."
"Thanks," Benjamin murmured, sitting back down. A moment later, he had a cup of coffee in his hand, but his stomach felt like it was full of lead and he didn't trust the hospital coffee not to throw off whatever delicate balance his body was maintaining. All that mattered was that Lita had a distraction and a better source of comfort than him for the moment.
Minutes seemed to stretch into hours before anyone came out through the double doors that divided the triage unit from the waiting room. Benjamin was on his feet first, asking, "What happened?" before the man in scrubs could give any answers. The doctor was a stout man who wasn't a shifter himself, but whose sister had married one after losing her husband. Ewan was one of the few humans the pack trusted implicitly, and whenever one of their own needed care that couldn't be provided on Cold Water lands, he saw to their wellbeing and their privacy.
"Your father is stable," Ewan said in a way that suggested he thought it meant something. Benjamin chose to take that as good news. "He's had a relatively major stroke, which can be a side effect of the meds."
"Why the hell is he on those things if they're killing him faster than the cancer?" Benjamin growled.
"Ben," Lita pleaded.
"I understand that you're upset," Ewan said calmly. "We've stopped the bleeding on his brain and once he's stable, we can look into an alternative treatment plan. Rest assured, this is a very rare side effect and not one Dr. Cole could have anticipated."
Benjamin forced himself to calm down, if only because the doctor in front of him wasn't the one he wanted to throttle. "Is he going to be alright?"
"For the moment, yes. It won't be clear until he wakes up just how much damage the stroke has caused, but at the moment, he's in a medically-induced coma."
"Coma?" Zane echoed before Benjamin had the chance. "Isn't that the kind of thing you come to the hospital to treat?"
"In some cases, it's the best way to ensure that the body has time to heal," said the doctor. "I promise you, your father will have around-the-clock care and we'll notify you as soon as anything changes."
"Can we see him?" Lita asked hopefully.
"In the morning," said the doctor. "Right now, the best thing he can do is rest. He wouldn't even know you were in the room."
Lita let out a strangled sob and Zane wrapped his arms around her. Benjamin mumbled a few words of thanks he didn't quite remember to the doctor and sat back down to wait. Soon, his mother came out into the waiting room and Benjamin and Lita held her while she cried until she finally fell asleep in the chair next to him. As the night stretched on, Lita fell asleep in the chair across from him, leaning against Zane's side.
Benjamin mouthed his thanks to the other alpha, who nodded in return. Words weren't necessary. If there had been any lingering doubt in Benjamin's mind that Zane was his sister's destined mate, it had vanished the moment he walked through those doors. None of them would forget what Zane had done for them that night, and if Benjamin had to lose his baby sister to anyone, he couldn't think of anyone he trusted more.
Chapter 25
YURI
Benjamin was due at any moment, and Yuri couldn't keep his nerves settled. He had experienced what had seemed like a full recovery from his stomach bug the night before only to be hit with another bout of nausea that had kept him in his room for most of the day. The temptation to call Benjamin and cancel their date was strong, but Yuri knew he would only be procrastinating. This time he had to end it. It wasn't fair to let the alpha throw any more of his time away on a lost cause. Sick or not, Yuri knew his heart wouldn't be able to continue withstanding Benjamin's charms if he let it carry on much longer.
The alpha arrived on time as usual, but there was a somber undertone to his polite greetings. He was quick enough to accept Yuri's suggestion that they take a walk around the grounds rather than going to a restaurant. There was no reason for it to be a public affair, thought Yuri. Besides, he decided he could use the fresh air.
After walking nearly half the courtyard in silence, Yuri figured it was time to speak up. Benjamin was right next to him, but the omega could tell his thoughts were far away. "Are you alright?"
Benjamin nodded. "Sorry. It's been a long week." He hesitated. "There's actually something we should talk about."
Yuri gulped. Maybe Benjamin had grown tired of making the trip and wanted to take things to the next logical step by bringing Yuri back home. He knew he had waited too long and didn't trust himself to give the right answer if Benjamin posed the question. "Okay, but there's something I have to tell you first."
"Sure," Benjamin said, coming to a stop. Yuri felt a pain of guilt at the concern that shadowed the alpha's face and looked away in shame. "Is something wrong?"
"No," Yuri said, wincing. "I mean, yes. There is. I just can't keep doing thi
s."
Benjamin frowned. "By this you mean...?"
"This, you and me," Yuri said, gesturing between them. "It's not fair to you, and it's..." He braced himself for the words his throat kept trying to choke down. Hurting Benjamin was inevitable, he reminded himself. It was just a matter of doing it now or later, when there was so much more damage to be done. "It's a waste of time."
Benjamin didn't react at first. His expression was a stone slate for a long while before it was written with confusion. "I don't really understand where this is coming from. After last time, I thought --"
"You thought you could wear me down," Yuri said, struggling to keep his voice from wavering. "I get it. You act different, but under the chivalry and the politeness, you're just like every other alpha I've dealt with. You're convinced whatever you want in the world is yours to claim, and it doesn't matter how anyone else feels."
"That's not how I feel," Benjamin said, his voice firm but calm as he reached for Yuri's hand. The touch sent a wave of calm through the omega when he needed to cling to manufactured anger the most. "You know it's more than that. After all this time, I'd think you would understand that you mean more than that to me."
"Well, I don't," Yuri said, shrugging out of the alpha's grasp. He was relentless. What would make him understand?
As Benjamin remained in front of him, a look of determination in his gaze where there should have been rage, Yuri knew what the answer was. There was only one thing that would work. The truth. The facts would have to be tweaked a little, just to be sure Benjamin got the message, but the underlying truth was what it would take to push him away. If Yuri gave in to the desire the alpha could stir in him with a simple look or the brush of his hand, he knew it was only a matter of time before Benjamin uncovered the truth on his own and rejected him. He might as well dress it up and present it to him now.
"You don't get it. I don't want you, and if you knew who I really am, you wouldn't want me, either," he said, growing more certain as he spoke. "You think you were my first? You weren't, and you won't be my last, either."
Confusion flickered behind Benjamin's eyes, then something closer to anger than Yuri had ever seen in them. "What?"
"I've been with other alphas. A few, actually. What we had wasn't special or original, it was just what I needed to do at the time to get what I wanted," he said, folding his arms. "Now that I'm here, I can choose who I want to be with, and I'm not going to give that up."
Benjamin stared at him for a moment, his face unreadable again. "I see," he said at length. "And that's what you feel? That's all you feel?"
"It is." Yuri's wolf raged in grief, tearing at the walls of his heart with its teeth and claws, demanding him to stop. Benjamin's pain was his own, or maybe it was just a bizarre hallucination. Either way, he had never felt more pain than he did in that moment.
"You don't mean that," said Benjamin, his fists clenched at his sides. For a moment, Yuri thought the alpha might hit him. When he flinched, Benjamin's horror eclipsed his anger and he reached out. "Yuri..."
"Just go," Yuri pleaded, backing away. "I've humored you long enough, but it's boring now and I never want to see you again."
Benjamin watched him like he was a wounded animal about to flee. "Alright," he said at length, turning to walk a few steps before he stopped and looked back. "I'm going to leave," he added slowly. "But don't think I believe you for a minute. You can lie to yourself, and you can lie to me, but there's something deeper than that between us. You belong to me," he murmured. "I meant what I said before, about not giving up, but there's only so far I can chase you before you realize I'm not the thing you're running from. When you do, you know where to find me."
With that, the alpha walked away and Yuri turned back immediately, knowing he didn't have the strength to watch Benjamin disappear without following him. Tears streamed down his cheeks as he made his way back to the dormitories, only getting as far as the oak tree outside the building before he collapsed in sobs.
Chapter 26
BENJAMIN
Life in the Cold Water pack returned to normal, even if life inside of the Stillwater family home was anything but. Heinrich still hadn't come home from the hospital and, despite the protests of her children, Sue insisted on staying by her mate's side. Every now and then, she could be convinced to return home for a few hours to sleep, shower and eat, but whenever Benjamin could find the time to tear himself away from the pack's affairs to visit his father in the hospital, his mother was guaranteed to be there.
Stepping into the official role of Alpha had come with more challenges than Benjamin had expected, despite all that he had done to prepare for it. He had gained an even deeper appreciation of just how much it took to maintain the day-to-day order of the pack and had even more admiration for his father's ability to somehow make time for his family in the midst of it all.
There was always something. A beta who felt that one of the others had stepped into his domain of authority. The clubhouse had been double-booked and it fell to the Alpha to play referee between organizations. Another pack needed someone to intervene in a dispute with rogue wolves on their territory. They were all valid concerns, but Benjamin found himself drained at the end of each day. He also had a new appreciation for his pack's insistence on its Alpha having a mate who could share the emotional burden of leadership and be a sanctuary for him while he made sure the pack was that for everyone else.
Yuri was never far from Benjamin's thoughts, and his wolf longed to return to Mountain Ridge and claim what was theirs more than ever. As much as Yuri's last words had stung, they had been hollow. Benjamin knew the omega hadn't really meant them, but he had also come to accept that he couldn't be certain enough for the both of them. He could love Yuri to the ends of the earth--and he did, with a love that somehow grew with the distance and time that passed between them--but until Yuri had made peace with it himself, all his efforts to bring them close would only push him further away. If Benjamin gave in to his instincts and brought his omega home where he knew he belonged, he would be further away than he ever had been.
Chapter 27
YURI
Yuri opened his eyes to the sound of a knock at the door, but he couldn't bring himself to get out of bed. It wasn't just a lack of energy, it was the fact that the last time he had dared to lift his head from the pillow, the entire room had spun beneath him. The knocking grew more frantic, and he heard a worried call in Angel's voice. "Yuri? You alright? I haven't seen you in days."
Yuri opened his mouth to answer, but talking seemed to take more strength than he had. A moment later, or maybe a few, Angel opened the door and rushed over to him. "Oh my gosh, Yuri... what's wrong?" he asked, pressing a hand against the other omega's cheek. "I thought you were better."
"Me, too," Yuri croaked, shivering. He wrapped himself tighter in the blankets, but it did nothing to help the chill that seemed to have worked its way inside his bones.
"I'm calling the doctor," Angel said, draping another blanket over Yuri. "I'll be right back."
Yuri closed his eyes and by the time he opened them, he was in the infirmary. He couldn't remember anything other than the sound of the door falling shut behind Angel, or being carried out of his room, but there he was. He didn't feel chilled anymore, and the nausea had dulled to a tolerable degree, but his head still spun when he tried to sit up. The steady mechanical beeping and the stinging in the crook of his arm alerted him to the fact that he was hooked up to a heart monitor and an IV. He could hear voices on the other side of the crisp white curtain surrounding his bed, and he recognized one of them as Angel's.
"What do you mean you 'just' lost the results?" Angel hissed.
"I'm sorry, sir," the other man replied. Yuri recognized his voice as one of the betas who worked under the doctors in the hospital. "We've had more intakes than usual and once of the interns must have lost his results."
"It could have been a lot worse," Angel scolded. "They both could have gotten sick."
Both?
"Angel?" Yuri called, his voice only slightly steadier than it had been the other day. The argument ceased and Angel peeled the curtain back, giving him a stiff smile.
"Hey there. Glad you're awake."
"How long was I asleep?" Yuri asked.
"Most of the afternoon." Angel shot the beta a pointed look. "Dennis has something to tell you."
The beta sighed. "I'm very sorry, Yuri. There was a mix-up. You really should have been notified of this a week ago."
"Notified of what?" he asked warily, gripping the railing to sit up.
Dennis' Adam's apple bobbed noticeably. "You're pregnant."
Yuri let the words wash over him, but they wouldn't sink in. "I'm what?" he squeaked.
"You're only a couple of months along," he murmured. "I believe being separated from your mate is what's exacerbating the morning sickness."
"Mate?" Yuri frowned. "I don't...he's not my mate," he said, feeling his face run through all the shades of red.
"No?" Dennis mused. "Sorry, I just assumed because of how ill you were. Of course, it's possible for an unmated omega to get pregnant, but it isn't very common."
"I'll take it from here," muttered Angel, sitting on the edge of Yuri's bed. "How are you feeling?" he asked, stroking the other omega's hair.
"Better, but...I don't understand. It was just one time."
"Sometimes that's all it takes," Angel said in a dry tone.
It was starting to set in a little, but Yuri wasn't sure realization was an improvement upon denial.
"It'll be alright," Angel assured him. "Maybe things are a little out of order, but Benjamin is a good man and he wants you to be his mate. He'll take care of the both of you, and I know you feel the same way he does."
"You don't understand," Yuri said shakily, remembering his last encounter with the alpha. "I didn't want him to have to."
Angel frowned. "You're right, I don't understand."
