Day of Atonement

by Yolonda Tonette Sanders

  “Goodbye, gentlemen.” Edgar slammed the door in their faces and B.K. slid his business card through a crack.

  “He’s definitely hiding something,” B.K. said to Troy once they were in the car. “The question is what?”

  Chapter 22: The Unknowns

  Three more days, Natalie thought to herself as she lay in bed wondering when her husband would get back. It was after ten o’clock at night. Nate was sound asleep and she had no idea whether her parents-in-law were still up or not. She’d pretty much tried to stay clear of both of them after what had happened earlier today.

  Natalie felt bad that she hadn’t told Troy everything. After Tracy left, Reed had come and knocked on her door.

  “May I speak with you for a moment?”

  “Sure.” Natalie felt a little uncomfortable when he shut the door and sat down on the bed opposite of her. She didn’t mind his warm embrace on Christmas Eve in front of the rest of the family, but this—being alone behind a closed door in a bedroom with her father-in-law, a man she had only met once before this trip—was awkward. Despite Troy’s attempt to let go of negative feelings about his dad, Natalie knew he would not appreciate this scenario. Granted, there was no other place for him to sit since the room was empty besides the bed and dresser, but standing seemed like a nice option. Since he didn’t, she did. “What would you like to talk about?”

  “I’m not going to hurt you, Natalie.” Apparently her change in stance had come across as fear rather than discomfort. He stood up, opened the bedroom door and leaned against it, motioning for her to sit back down. “Is this better?”

  “I’m sorry, I—”

  “No, it’s okay. I get that I invaded your personal space. I’m sorry. I want to know how much you overheard, but I can tell by your actions.” He blew a heavy sigh and put his head in his hands. “I think I’ve been able to calm Tracy down. She’s not going to say anything to Troy or her mother, at least I hope she doesn’t. I know I can’t ask the same of you, but because you heard her accusations, I at least want to explain who it was that Tracy saw at the house. Given all the pressure Troy is under because of this case, I don’t think he would understand and I also don’t want to mess up the little progress we have made in our relationship.”

  “Reed, I honestly don’t want to be involved so the less you tell me the better. It’s not my place to tell Diane that you’re seeing another woman and I would prefer that Troy not find out while we’re here.”

  Reed looked confused. “So, you heard Tracy accuse me of being with another woman?”

  “Yes.” Natalie was unsure why his expression changed from confusion to relief. Suddenly she found her anger flaring. It wasn’t only because she hurt for what Reed’s current affair would do to Diane. It was also the fear of this being a setback for her husband. This could really be spiritually and emotionally damaging for him and the fact that Reed was hurting the person whom she loved most infuriated her. Before she could think about her actions, she was on the other side of the bed, standing face-to-face with him. “Personally, I find your actions disgraceful. You should be ashamed of yourself. Diane really has a lot of faith in believing that you have changed and Troy is doing his best to get over things from the past. For both of their sakes, I hope Tracy doesn’t tell and that you get right, especially with God.”

  “Understood,” Reed said and walked out.

  Now, Natalie lay in bed wondering if telling him that she did not want to get involved had been the right course of action. She already felt bad about keeping the sex of their babies from Troy. Did she have the right to withhold this information? Yes! Yes, she did. It was not her business to share. Besides, she didn’t know all the facts. Troy had enough on his mind with Elana’s case and hopefully Tracy would take that into consideration.

  Natalie could not get over how relieved Reed looked knowing that his secret was safe with her. She felt like a co-conspirator. He soon left, likely for his clandestine meeting with his mistress, whom Natalie suspected was the recipient of the voice message she’d overheard him leaving. When Diane got home, Natalie thought it best to stay out of sight. She allowed Nate to hang out with his “Gigi” while she stayed in the room with her heart aching about the false sense of security her mother-in-law had in Reed. If Diane knew that he was still cheating, that would destroy her and uproot any spiritual seeds about Jesus that had been planted in her life. That was the part that angered Natalie the most—that Reed was using Jesus as a cover-up. Somehow Natalie would find the way to resume her heart-to-heart with Diane that they were having a couple of days ago in the kitchen before the crazy broom thing happened. Diane asked once before if Jesus could really save someone like her. Natalie knew the answer was yes, but she did not know how she would ever be able to convince Diane that people can and really do change if her mother-in-law ever learned about Reed’s façade.

  “Hey, you…,” Troy said when he came in the room.

  “Hey, yourself.” She smiled, relieved to find him in a decent mood. He leaned over to give her a kiss and she held him tight.

  “You okay?’

  “Yes. You?” She tried to sound casual, but what she really wanted to know was if he had spoken with Tracy.

  He blew a deep breath. “Tired. We went to see two of Lilly’s ex-husbands today.”

  “How’d things go?”

  “Okay. If the person who kidnapped Elana and later left her on the highway are one and the same, then Lilly’s last husband is crossed off the list.” Troy informed her about Herbert’s condition. “There’s no way Herbert could have been involved with disposing of Elana’s body. Now we’re thinking it was either El’s uncle Bill or their father. I thought it might be a different uncle, but he’s been eliminated through DNA. After tonight, my bet is on the father.”

  “What makes you think that?”

  “Oh, babe, it’s a long story and I really don’t feel like getting into it right now. I’m just happy to see you.” He kissed her again. “I know we haven’t spent much quality time together since we’ve been here. Thanks for understanding how important Elana’s case is to me and not complaining.”

  Why would she complain? In three more days she would have her husband and life back.

  “I have an appointment tomorrow, but how about on Friday, we all do something together?”

  “I’m cool with that. You’ll have to check with your mom. I’m sure she’ll be thrilled to be one big happy family.” Natalie spoke with bitterness as Reed’s affair crossed her mind, but luckily it came across to Troy as humorous.

  “Actually, I was thinking that it should be the five of us—you, Nate, me, and the unknowns.” He frowned. “That doesn’t sound right, does it? Sounds like they were made in a petri dish.” He lifted her shirt and began kissing her belly. “I can’t wait to meet them. I do wonder what they are, but I am so glad that we are waiting to be surprised.”

  The knowledge of her deception was too much to bear in light of her now keeping Reed’s secret. “Honey, I have to tell you something.” Natalie remembered how irate Troy got when he’d learned that she hadn’t stopped taking birth control pills prior to this pregnancy. Hopefully, what she was about to disclose would not cause a repeat of that behavior. “I found out what we’re having.”

  Troy froze, looking up at her from her stomach. “Seriously?” He got up and paced back and forth. “You know how I feel about you keeping things from me. I thought we agreed we would wait until they were born. How could you go behind my back?”

  “I’m sorry, honey. At first I wanted to wait, too, but then I started freaking out. I know you say you’ll be more involved, but we both know how you are when you are working on a case. I was scared that I would be overwhelmed and wanted to be as prepared as possible. I’m so sorry, Troy.” She walked to him. “I should have told you when I found out. No, I shouldn’t have found out without talking to you first.”

  “Yes, you should have talked to me first instead of being deceitful. You have violated m
y trust and I don’t know if I can get over this.” He looked at her and then away from her quickly and covered his eyes with his hands. His tone and actions were a little too over the top. When her generally stoic husband started sniffling and asking questions in a voice a few octaves higher than his norm, that’s when she caught on.

  “You idiot!” She playfully punched him in the arm. “How long have you known?”

  “How dare you physically assault me after shattering my trust in your ability to communicate honestly with me?” He continued his antics.

  Natalie rolled her eyes and got back in bed. “You suck at acting. How’d you find out? Did Aneetra tell you?”

  He followed her back to the bed, resuming his position on her mid-section. “Oh, so the BFF is in on this, too? What about Corrine?”

  “No. I didn’t think she would be able to keep it a secret. Seriously, how did you find out?”

  “Babe, did you forget that you’re married to a detective? I discover things for a living. The next time you want to add items to your Amazon wish list without my knowledge, it will help if you changed the setting to private.”

  She laughed. “I can’t believe I did that. Talk about having baby brain. So, you aren’t mad?”

  “No. At first I was disappointed because I would have liked to have been there with you, but I understand your reasoning. I figured as much. Then I found it hilarious that you were pretending like it was still a surprise. I was curious to see how long you would keep up the charade. I wanted to bust you out the other morning at breakfast so bad, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it in front of everyone.”

  Natalie hoped Troy would be as understanding if he ever found out that she knew his dad was still cheating on his mom. She motioned for him to move closer to her face. “I love you,” she said before giving him a kiss that was sure to wake up his extremity.

  He smiled. “If I say I’m mad, will we get to make up?”

  Instead of answering him, she pulled him in for another kiss.

  Chapter 23: A Good Night’s Sleep

  “Okay, Troy, I need you to take slow deep breaths.” The soft, soothing sound of Shauna’s voice helped calm his nerves as he lay back in the chair, closed his eyes, and followed her instructions. “As you breathe, you will feel yourself relax more and more every time you exhale. Your body is light, like a feather, and you’re gently floating through the air. I want you to think of a happy place and stay there.”

  Happy place? Besides home, his wasn’t a particular location. It was a condition, anywhere that included Natalie, Nate, and peace. His happy place involved seeing the smile on his wife’s face when she looked at him or hearing the excitement in lil’ man’s voice when he walked into the room. The peace he felt when he lay down next to Natalie at night, knowing she’s safe in his arms…smelling her hair…sometimes watching her sleep, the pride he cannot contain when hugging his son…their growing family…these were the things that made up his place of happiness.

  “You should feel very calm right now. I want you to stay there and focus solely on the sound of my voice. I’m going to count down and as I do, you will go deeper into a relaxed state of mind. Ten…,” she began softly, “nine…eight…seven…”

  As she continued, his nerves about the process began to dissipate and Troy found himself at ease as the tranquilizing sound of Shauna’s voice walked him down the road to serenity. There, he separated from himself and followed all of her instructions, uninhibited, answering all of her questions unrestrained.

  “Let’s go back to the day Elana disappeared. How old were you then?”

  “Eleven.”

  “Troy, you are now an observer to the events that took place that day. I want you to look around and tell me everything you see and hear. Tell me where you are and what you are doing.”

  Troy watched the eleven-year-old version of himself sitting alongside Elvin in the living room. It was the day after Elvin’s birthday. He’d turned eleven. They’d been up all night playing the Atari Elvin’s mom had given him. Both boys still had on the same clothes they’d worn yesterday—Troy, a pair of black shorts with a white crewneck T-shirt; Elvin, denim jean shorts and a red-striped T-shirt. Details that had previously escaped him had now become clear—the crumbs from all the junk food they’d eaten overnight as well as the stain from the soda that Elvin had spilled that he had not yet gotten up. To keep Miss Lilly from seeing it, he had placed a pillow over it while pretending it was being used for cushion for his knees.

  “Where’s Elana while you and Elvin are playing the game?”

  At first she was upstairs. Elana had asked if her friend, Salome, could stay overnight, but Miss Lilly had said no because Salome was too “fast” and she didn’t want that little girl staying all night when boys were around. If Miss Lilly thought that Troy or Elvin would take a second look at an eight-year-old, she was really out of touch with the minds of preteen boys. There was no way Salome could compare to the girl who played Thelma on Good Times. That show had been off the air now for several years and yet Troy was still stunned by her beauty. Once he heard his aunt’s boyfriend say that Thelma had curves in all the right places. Troy hadn’t known what that meant back then, but now, at age eleven, he was starting to comprehend. Salome could not compete no matter how “fast” she was.

  Upset that Salome could not come over, Elana spent most of the evening in her room pouting. Miss Lilly would not let her hang out downstairs with Elvin and Troy because it was a given that there would be a fight. There always was. If Elana wasn’t picking on them, they were picking on her. The next morning Elana came down in her Strawberry Shortcake pajamas before Miss Lilly or Mr. Herbert had gotten up.

  “What are y’all playing?” she asked, sitting on the couch behind them. She didn’t have her doll.

  Elvin explained the game and the concept.

  “Will you show me how to play?”

  “Maybe later when Troy leaves.”

  “When is he leaving?”

  “I don’t know. Later.”

  “Then I wanna watch cartoons.”

  “No. Go back upstairs. Mama said that we can have the TV.” Elvin’s family only had two televisions. One in Miss Lilly’s room and the “good” one down in the living room.

  Elvin and Elana continued arguing back and forth until footsteps descended the stairs. It was Mr. Herbert. No one spoke. As soon as he rounded the corner, Elana got up and ran up the stairs. Soon her bedroom door slammed.

  Mr. Herbert belched loudly as he went into the kitchen. Moments later he returned, headed out the front door. “I’ll be back.”

  Elvin didn’t respond. Last night, the night of his eleventh birthday, there had been another fight. This one wasn’t as bad as it could have gotten, but the kids did hear yelling and a few slaps being exchanged as they sat in the kitchen eating cake and ice cream. Elana was with them and they were all getting along. Actually, they were quiet, purposely focusing on the treats while pretending not to hear what was happening upstairs in the master bedroom.

  “Tell me what was happening in the moments immediately prior to Elana’s disappearance,” Shauna prodded.

  Troy and Elvin had been playing Asteroids at that time. Troy’s butt was numb. The heel of his right foot had left an imprint in his left thigh from him sitting Indian style for so long. The soda stain was no longer wet and had become even darker after it dried. Miss Lilly was in the kitchen making several phone calls, worried about Mr. Herbert who hadn’t been seen since leaving that morning.

  The boys had not moved. Still clothed in yesterday’s attire, they continued playing the game. Due to her whining that she was “bored,” Miss Lilly had told them to let Elana play. They did. Kind of. She wasn’t that good so her turn would be over within a few minutes of her having the controller. Instead of making allowances for her being a novice, they took advantage of the situation. They made up a rule that anyone who scored a certain number of points would get an extra turn, maximum of three, knowing that the
conditions would never apply to Elana. Consequently, both Elvin and Troy could be playing for up to thirty or forty minutes each while Elana waited. At first she was patient, going upstairs to retrieve that ugly doll to keep her occupied. After a while, her patience started to wear thin and she began arguing with them. That’s when Miss Lilly got involved. As a compromise, she promised to buy them all treats if they would behave while she was gone. That did not work too well. Before long, Elana and the boys were at it again and she ran out crying.

  “Did Elana take the doll with her when she left?”

  “Yes.” She had been holding it by one arm. Her braided ponytails flopped as she took off. She did not have barrettes in her hair.

  “I want you to really concentrate now, Troy. Did you hear anything after she left?”

  Crying! Troy could faintly recall hearing sobs coming from the front porch.

  “Very good. Now think really hard. Is there anything else you can tell me about that day?”

  Troy heard Elana crying. He was sure Elvin heard it, too, but neither of them paid her any attention. They were both too engrossed in the game and happy to have her out of their way. Troy knew that if Elana was still on the porch when Miss Lilly got back, he and Elvin would get a good fussing out. Knowing Elana, she would cry even harder when her mom returned. Now Troy wished his mom would hurry because he didn’t want Miss Lilly being upset with him about anything. She was pretty. He didn’t like seeing her mad. Plus, she had enough troubles with Mr. Herbert. Troy wasn’t sure how long Elana sat out there sobbing. After a while he heard a car door.

  “When you say you heard a car door, was this right before Miss Lilly came into the house?”

  “No. It was way before Miss Lilly came home.”

  Shauna asked him a series of other questions about whether or not he’d seen anything when they went out to look for Elana such as if they found her doll or any trace of her having left the front porch.

  Troy answered them all.

  “Good job. I am going to count down again and when I do, you will be fully functional and alert, able to remember everything that happened here today.” When she finished, Troy came to himself. “How do you feel?”