Being Zolt

by D. L. Raver

  “You’re doing great, Irelyn. Just great,” Brody encouraged.

  “I’m right here. Squeeze my hand as hard as you must.” Zolt brought our joined hands to his lips and kissed mine.

  When I stared at our hands, I was shocked to see just how tight a hold I had on his. Smiling weakly, I dropped it and steeled myself for the inevitable. The best course of action would be to get it over with; rip off the proverbial bandage so I could deal with the wound underneath.

  With a shaking hand, I navigated to where T said the video diary lived. Just as he said, it was hidden in a file named OU812, a reference to our favorite Van Halen CD. It still amazed me that he and his men had found it, but that was what made T-bone the best.

  Pointing the cursor over the entry named For Irelyn, I right-clicked on the file and was prompted for a password. My eyes darted to Zolt’s before I typed it in. I needed to find the strength to do this, but right now, all I wanted to do was crawl under the bed and hide.

  “You can do this, Irelyn,” Zolt reassured.

  I shook my head, wondering if I’d turned yellow because I sure felt like a coward. Seeing Chris and hearing his voice would open old wounds. Though I’d managed to keep myself from falling completely apart after Marcus’s visual and physical torture, I wasn’t sure I could stay in control once I saw the video of my brother.

  Zolt turned my face from the laptop, forcing me to look at him. “Do you want me to open the file, Irelyn?”

  I wanted to say “No, I can do it,” but I couldn’t find the words. They had exited stage left along with my resolve, so I nodded and let Zolt take over.

  A few seconds later, my brother’s beautiful face appeared on the screen. I dug my nails into my leg and begged my tears to stay away, but they coursed mercilessly down my cheeks anyway.

  Zolt glanced at me and paused the program. Without words, he caught Brody’s gaze. His brother stood, squeezed my shoulder and left the room.

  “Stand,” Zolt commanded.

  Without question, I did. He sat down in the chair I had just vacated, spreading his legs and making room for me to sit between them.

  “Sit.”

  I sat on the chair between Zolt’s legs and leaned back against his firm chest. He started the video again, and as Chris came to life in front of me, Zolt wrapped his arms around me, holding me, giving me the love and strength I so desperately needed.

  “Irelyn,” Chris said, letting out a long, agonized sigh. His beautiful green eyes were dark and as tortured as his sigh had been.

  I wanted to reach in and touch him—hold his hand and tell him that everything worked out. But it hadn’t. The situation couldn’t be more jacked up. He was dead. Ruthlessly murdered in cold blood by a monster of a man he’d called a friend.

  I started to shake as the memory of Chris lying dead in a pool of his own blood bombarded me. I couldn’t do this. I just couldn’t.

  Zolt stopped the video again.

  “You can do this, Irelyn,” he said, negating my thoughts with his reassuring words. “I know it will seem like an eternity, but it’s only a few minutes. That’s it, baby. Just a few minutes.”

  Swallowing hard, I nodded, and Zolt started the video once more.

  “If you’re seeing this, it means some major shit has gone down and I’ve either disappeared or am dead. It also probably means you’re with Marcus; though, I pray to God I’m wrong.” Chris’s gorgeous countenance twisted with hate as he growled Marcus’s name.

  “The first thing I’m going to tell you is to get away from Marcus. I just hope you’re seeing this before he’s convinced you to be with him or worse, marry him.” Chris sucked in a ragged breath and leaned closer to the screen. “He’s bad news, Irelyn. Get. The. Fuck. Away. From. Him!”

  My blood turned cold with my brother’s words and his message that had come too late to save me from everything I’d given to Marcus. But I had to hope Chris had more to tell us that would help Kenna.

  Chris’s demeanor relaxed some and he sat back in his chair. “I know things—incriminating things. I’ve kept them to myself because it indicts our father, as well. But I’m done protecting him. Fuck him! He deserves everything he gets and more. I will never forgive him for what he’s done or will do. If I am dead, make no mistake, my death is on his head as much as it will be on Marcus’s.”

  Quickly, I clicked the mouse and stopped the video.

  “Why didn’t he just leave?” I said through my tears, turning to look at Zolt. “If he knew he was in danger, why didn’t he just leave?”

  “I don’t know. Let’s watch the rest of the video.” I could tell from the shake in Zolt’s voice that this affected him as much as it did me.

  I restarted the video, vowing not to stop it again.

  “I’m sure you’re probably wondering why I didn’t leave if I’m worried about my safety?”

  I laughed. Even from beyond the grave, Chris read my mind; he always could. It used to freak me out. Now, it made me love and miss him even more.

  “I had to protect you, Irelyn. I’ve done everything in my power to do so. I can’t elaborate other than to say our father made some major mistakes and turned to Marcus for help. You paid the price to save his sorry ass.”

  Chris stopped again and scrubbed his hands over his face; stress lines marred his forehead. “This isn’t what I wanted. I never dreamed that Jacob could be such a spineless, cheating bastard and Marcus would turn the club into a BDSM sex den. It was supposed to be a harmless club with games of chance and the like. You know a place where rich fucks could come drink, screw around with beautiful women, play some poker — shit like that. When it turned into a place where we planned to auction girls against their consent for money, I put my foot down. But since you’re watching this, I guess my foot wasn’t big enough to stop Marcus.”

  “So,” Chris said and pinched the bridge of his nose. “There’s only one thing I can think to do for you. One thing I’m hoping won’t be sabotaged. Irelyn, I’m sending you Zolt Hamil. I hope to God he can help you, even if I can’t.”

  I gasped at Chris’s words, not believing my ears, and embraced Irelyn tighter.

  What the fuck!

  “I’ll never forget that day on the sidelines during the Cardinal’s playoff game against the Steelers,” Chris continued.

  “Neither will I,” I grumbled into Irelyn’s hair.

  “You were so distraught. At first, I found it irritating when your despair lasted well into the next week. You were a fifteen-year-old girl completely torn up over a man you didn’t even know. You acted as if the two of you had a relationship—some kind of connection based on a fleeting moment. As the years passed, I started to look on it differently, especially when it became clear that day had stayed with you. I couldn’t help wondering if there were something bigger at play. You know me, I’m not a romantic by any means, but something about what happened between you and Zolt struck me.”

  Irelyn and I both drew in a breath at the same time. She turned around and looked at me. The smile and love I saw on her face took my breath away.

  Together we both turned our attention back to the screen to listen to the rest of Chris’s message.

  “So, I did some research on him and found out he had become a lawyer. I went to Dad and convinced him to interview Zolt and bring him here. I knew Dad wanted to bring sports representation into the firm’s repertoire, and the idea of an ex-Arizona-Cardinal-quarterback-turned-lawyer would appeal to him in a big way. I hope that at this very moment, Zolt Hamil is working at the firm and the two of you have reconnected.

  “If you have, if you have feelings for him, and he has them for you, don’t ignore them because of Marcus. I don’t care what he does, Irelyn. Move Heaven and Earth if you have to, but don’t let that monster control you. But I’m afraid I fucked up, yet again. Marcus asked me about Zolt and I stupidly told him Dad hired him. Now, I’m afraid he’ll do something to stop Zolt from coming here.”

  “I’ll talk to Dad again and
remind him of the benefits of bringing Zolt into the firm and the possible increased revenue stream. Hopefully, that will be enough to get him to push for Zolt. I have to believe somewhere in his greedy, black heart that our father cares about you enough to do this for you.”

  Chris ran his hands through his hair. “Time is running out for me. This whole situation is so jacked-up that it’s almost laughable. I just hope I’ve done enough for you. The thought that you might end up with Marcus makes me physically ill. I’ll do anything to stop that from happening.”

  Sobs wracked Irelyn’s body, and I held her tight as I could without hurting her. If I was being truthful, I kind of wanted to cry, too. Chris had orchestrated our reunion not having a clue what Irelyn and the memory of that day had meant to me. He’d brought me to the woman I was going to marry. For that, I’d always be grateful.

  “Okay, I need to wrap this up. I need you to do something for me. Get in the Mustang and take her for a long, fast drive.”

  Again, Chris leaned forward. This time he stared hard into the camera as if he were trying to impart something important. “Turn on the stereo, play our song and think of me. I love you, Irelyn; more than you know. I hope you find happiness in whatever you do and whoever you do it with.”

  Chris tapped the keyboard and the screen went blank. I memorized Chris’s instruction about playing their song. It meant something and in Irelyn’s state, she might have missed the reference.

  I shut the laptop, and we sat in silence with my arms around the woman I loved. While she cried, I did my best to soothe her. If the roles had been reversed, and it would have been Brody’s message, I doubt I could have kept it together. I’d get baked and go find a woman to fuck until I forgot all about watching a video of my dead brother talking to me from the grave.

  But Irelyn wasn’t me, thank God.

  She stopped crying, dried her face, and then she stood and faced me. Even with her tear-stained face, she was impossibly beautiful, and I was madly, and irrevocably, in love with her.

  “God, Zolt, I’m so angry with him. I mean he was running a sex club from our grandpa’s home. Why would he do that?”

  “I don’t know, baby. I’ll admit it doesn’t make sense.” I was at a loss. I didn’t know what to say that would make any of this better.

  She straightened her back and stood tall, and resolve lit her eyes. “Regardless of what he did, Chris wanted us together, and I want that, too. Let’s go to Vegas, Zolt. Marry me tonight. Just you and me.”

  “Irelyn?” I said questioningly, taken back by her sudden change in demeanor. “Are you sure that’s what you want?”

  “Yes, Zolt. I’m absolutely sure. Look at what Chris sacrificed for us. We owe this to him. Waiting a year or more so we can have a big-ass, stupid society wedding is fucked-up, given everything. And there is no way I’m going to let my father walk me down the aisle. I don’t want him anywhere near us, ever. Even if he did defy Marcus and finished what Chris started, it’s not enough.”

  I pulled Irelyn to me and kissed her with all I had. Fuck, the thought that we’d go to bed tonight married blew me away.

  “Baby, are you sure? What about Rach, Cory, and Brody? Don’t you want them there?” I didn’t want to discourage her, but I needed to make absolute certain.

  “I love them, I do. But I love you more. I want to give this to Chris, but more than that, I want to give this to us. We deserve this. After everything Marcus has done to ruin us, he’s failed. I want to celebrate by starting our lives together sooner rather than later.”

  “All right.” Smiling, I cupped her face and kissed her incredibly soft lips. “Let’s go to Vegas.”

  As soon as we decided to go to Las Vegas and elope, everything seemed to fall into place, and I had to wonder if Chris blessed us from beyond. We found a lovely resort near Las Vegas that was on a lake and had a beautiful garden venue for secluded wedding ceremonies. Since the flight only took an hour, we’d set the ceremony time for sunset. It was going to be amazing and I couldn’t wait.

  T-bone arranged for us to have a private jet. He and Zolt decided it was best for T to book the jet in case Marcus spied on us; we didn’t need him ruining our plans. But just in case, we’d be traveling with two bodyguards.

  Anna went through my mom’s jewelry and found the antique diamond-and-seed-pearl comb that had belonged to my grandmother Mary. Then, I called Beth, my mother’s personal shopper, and had her bring me some dresses suitable for the wedding. I picked a short, lace dress with fancy cap sleeves, sweetheart bodice, and a lace keyhole opening. Along with the dress, I had Beth bring sexy new white-and-blue lace—my something blue—Agent Provocateur panties and garter belt with silk stockings. I also had my beauty salon send over someone to give me a Brazilian waxing. It hurt like a bitch, but I wanted to give Zolt a little wedding-night gift. Just thinking about him taking off my dress almost excited me more than marrying him. Almost.

  “Are you ready to go?” Zolt asked, leaning on the doorway of his—soon to be our—bedroom.

  “I am. Are you?” I licked my lips. He looked good enough to eat in his black slacks that hung perfectly on his hips and an Armani Collezioni, blue button-up shirt that made his crystalline-blues sparkle. Or maybe it was me who made them sparkle?

  He nodded as he walked toward me. “And you’re still sure you want it to be just us?

  “Yes. I’m sure.”

  Zolt ran his hands through my hair, making me shiver. His eyes darkened, and I could tell he had something to tell me.

  “What?”

  “I’ve been thinking about the video. I think Chris left us a clue. I don’t think he simply wanted you to remember him by driving his car. What was yours and Chris’s favorite song?”

  “Cabo Wabo. Why?” I asked, arching a brow.

  “My sixth sense is telling me there is something there. He did leave the video in the OU812 file folder. I told T-bone about it. He’s going to check out all the Van Halen files in the Mustang’s stereo.”

  “I don’t understand.” I picked some lint from my black, tuxedo-inspired jumpsuit.

  “I just have a feeling, is all? It can’t hurt to have T and his guys go through it. I promise the Mustang will be returned in pristine condition.” Zolt kissed my nose. “You look amazingly hot in that, by the way. Too bad the flight is so short; I’d love to introduce you to the mile-high club.”

  I smiled at him wickedly. “Oh no, Mr. Hamil. No sex until you’ve made an honest woman of me.”

  The doorbell rang, saving me from Zolt’s advances. I was pretty sure he was about to test my resolve.

  “That’s probably the guy from Kavanagh’s with my wedding band. I told him to have the Irish jeweler make a band that matches your engagement ring, but we won’t have that for at least a month.”

  “Well done,” I said patting him on the back. “I didn’t even see you cringe when you said wedding band.”

  “I’m ready for this, Irelyn.” He kissed me sweetly. “I have no nerves about this at all.”

  “Me either.” But I did have concerns about one thing, and I didn’t know how to bring it up. Instead of saying anything, I started gnawing on the side of my thumb.

  “What?” The corner of his eyes tightened with concern.

  “What about your medical marijuana? You can’t travel to Vegas with it.” I sucked in a breath and hoped he’d see the question as one of concern and not condemnation.

  “T has arranged for it. The driver will have some waiting. It’s nothing for you to worry about.”

  “Okay. I just want you to have what you need.” I gave him a small smile.

  “I have everything I need, baby.” Zolt pulled me into him, and his mouth descended on mine. He kissed me until we both panted for air. “I better go see who’s at the door.”

  I nodded, smiling as he left the room. Just a few weeks ago, I felt terrified at the thought of marriage, knowing that the proposal would come from a man I couldn’t stand. It didn’t matter to me that our we
dding would be small, not the grand affair Rach and I had always fantasized about. With all the changes in my family, and with Dad’s involvement with Marcus, the sordid details would come out, along with the snubs and finger pointing.

  Yes, it was selfish of me to do it this way. Rachel and Cory, not to mention my parents, were going to be pissed we’d eloped. But as I glanced over at Zolt and saw him wearing the same large grin as me, I knew I’d made the right decision.

  We drank champagne on the plane to Vegas and enjoyed our time alone.

  “Hey, Zolt,” I said after I finished my second glass.

  “Hey, Irelyn.” He winked at me, and I felt my insides turn to mush.

  “Will you tell me about your mother?”

  “My mom? Sure. What do you want to know?” He turned his chair to face me.

  “You never talk about her. I’m just curious,” I said tentatively. I didn’t want to pry, but then we were getting married…

  “Neither Brody nor I have spoken to her in years.” He ran his finger up and down the stem of his flute.

  “Why?”

  “Well,” he said, dragging his gaze to mine. “She married a man we both couldn’t stand. A man who used her for the money she’d received when our Dad died.”

  “Oh.” I didn’t know what else to say.

  “After our dad died, Mom went crazy. She started dating all kinds of losers.”

  “He died in a car accident, right?” I remembered reading that in one of the articles about Zolt when he played football.

  “Yeah. The weather was rainy and wet, and he lost control of the car and ran into a tree. I was nineteen and in my first year of college.” Pain flashed in his eyes and he glanced down and to the right. “She was out-of-control, partying night after night, drinking too much. Grief had consumed her—I can see that now. But then she married Henry.”

  “I’m sorry, Zolt.” I grabbed his hand, wondering if this was why he’d been reluctant to have a relationship before. “I didn’t mean to open up a sore subject. I just wanted to know.”