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The Remarkable Flight of Marnie McPhee

Page 3

by Daniel Karasik


  MARNIE

  Um. Mom.

  MOM

  Hi, Marnie.

  MARNIE

  You want help standing up again?

  MOM

  Will you visit your grandmother?

  MARNIE

  Oh. Um. Okay. But she's old.

  MOM

  I know.

  MARNIE

  So. Like. She can't do much.

  MOM

  That's why it'd be nice if you went to visit her.

  MARNIE

  Yeah, okay. It's just… when I go… she just lies there and looks at me and stuff. And touches my face. And talks about Uncle Jimmy who likes guys. Which is okay. But there's not much for me to… do. Like, I can't help her.

  MOM

  It's nice for her just to have you there.

  MARNIE

  Yeah, but like I can't save anyone or anything. She'll still be old. She'll be old when I get there, she'll be old when I leave.

  MOM

  She has a better time being old with her family around her.

  MARNIE

  Don't you find it… kinda… I don't know, boring, though? I mean it's nice to go and be a nice person, but doesn't it get boring? I mean you can't even say funny things like, "Hey you're old," or, "Look at you, so old and not even young anymore!" Et cetera.

  MOM

  She's my mom. I love her.

  MARNIE

  Maybe if she loved you as much she would've stayed young.

  MOM

  …

  MARNIE

  Mom. Mom? Are you crying?

  MOM

  …no.

  MARNIE

  Your nose did a funny "I'm not crying but I'm crying" thing. I'll buy you toilet paper when you're old even if it's boring, Mom.

  MOM

  I hope you never have to do that.

  MARNIE

  Why? You do it.

  MOM

  No. You said it. I love you far too much ever to do you the injustice of becoming old.

  MARNIE

  I don't think that's an "injustice." An "injustice" would be like if you stole bread from a poor person. Especially if you weren't even really that hungry.

  MOM

  Look at you. Judge Marnie.

  MARNIE

  Ewww!

  MOM

  Ewww?

  MARNIE

  Judges have to wear those robes! Those robes are gross! But kinda cool. But also gross.

  MOM

  Help me stand up?

  MARNIE gives her a hand.

  Shall I walk you back to bed?

  MARNIE

  That's okay. I know the way.

  MOM

  Yes, but you might get lost.

  MARNIE

  Promise I won't.

  MOM

  Promise for real?

  MARNIE

  Super promise.

  MOM

  All right. Good night then.

  She turns to go.

  MARNIE

  Mom?

  MOM turns back.

  I like it when the pipes sing.

  MOM

  They're a bit rusty.

  MARNIE

  Nobody could tell. Not even plumbing experts.

  MOM

  You're sweet.

  MARNIE

  Ew.

  MOM

  Go to bed soon.

  She goes.

  MARNIE

  Stay strong, McPhee, stay strong!

  Tinfoil in place of sheet metal, stuffed panda bear in place of engine: check, check, check!

  I just need one more spaceship construction item and then we're ready for takeoff! A radio. Now where, where can I find a radio in my house…?

  In her mind's eye she sees, remembering:

  ALAN

  If I put on my headphones, don't think I'm not listening. I'm listening. I'm just listening without being able to hear you as much as I would if I weren't wearing headphones. So don't be insulted. Okay?

  And he lifts up A RADIO! Well, a jukebox. But a jukebox with radio capabilities.

  Overjoyed, MARNIE sings, à la "We're Off to See the Wizard":

  MARNIE

  We're off to Alan's bedroom! to borrow his ra-di-o! to borrow to borrow to borrow to borrow to borrow his raaaaa-di-ooo, because we're building a spa-ace-ship, a spa-ace-ship, a spa-ace-ship, we are, we are, we are, we are, we aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrre…

  She quiets down, creeps upstairs towards ALAN's bedroom on tiptoe—when suddenly she hears a noise!

  From the front porch comes the clicking that we heard before, louder than we heard it before: clickity-clickity-clickity-click. And again.

  Ever so quietly, holding her finger over her lips and motioning to us to do the same, she creeps towards the front door, which is ajar, and steps out onto the porch.

  And there's DAD—peering into a telescope, adjusting it, with a clickity-clickity-clickity-click.

  MARNIE creeps ever so quietly back into the house… but then DAD whirls the telescope around and points it directly at her!

  DAD

  Oh my. Oh me oh my. What's this?

  MARNIE

  Eeek!

  DAD

  Oh, it makes noise. Fascinating. A strange and distant rock formation. Is it a planet? I wonder if it's habitable. Maybe we should send a signal and see if we get a response. Yes yes, check check, sending, sending…

  A sound like a seagull cawing:

  Awwwk! Squaaawwk!

  MARNIE

  Eeek! Eeek!

  DAD

  Awwwk! Squaaawwk!

  MARNIE

  Dad, it's me!

  DAD

  Oh, it talks, it talks! A talking planet! McPhee to base, McPhee to base, we have a sighting of a talking planet, looks like a little girl, seems friendly but we're going to send out a crew to investigate, over.

  MARNIE

  Dad?

  DAD

  Now it appears to be talking directly to me, over.

  MARNIE

  Dad!

  DAD

  …yes?

  MARNIE

  What are you doing?

  DAD

  Oh. Nothing. And you? Why are you still up? What were you doing?

  MARNIE

  Oh. Nothing.

  They stare at each other for a moment.

  DAD glances up at the night sky.

  DAD

  If we lived in the country you could see way more stars than here. Hundreds. There's so much light pollution in the city. And pollution-pollution. People shouldn't be allowed to drive their cars. We sacrifice the infinite for the Honda.

  MARNIE

  Um… I think people need to drive… to drop their kids off at school. Et cetera.

  DAD

  That's true.

  MARNIE

  But… yeah… of course… you wouldn't want to lose the, um… the infinite.

  DAD

  They should teach you the map of the sky in school. Do they teach you that?

  MARNIE

  Sure. Um. That's the moon. And I know how to find the sun, during the daytime. And Alan showed me how to find Uranus.

  DAD

  Oh yeah? How? It's difficult to spot in urban environments, depending on—

  MARNIE

  Never mind.

  DAD

  You should learn the stars. Or at least a handful of important ones. The North Star. Ursa Major, Ursa Minor. The archer. You should learn where the stars should be. The star Maia, for instance, should be right there. But you can't see it from here. Which is a bit terrible, if y
ou ask me. But what's more terrible is that most people don't even know it to miss it.

  MARNIE

  Show me where it should be.

  DAD gets behind his telescope, adjusts the angle, the focus. He finds the spot he's looking for.

  DAD

  Here.

  He leads MARNIE behind the telescope. She looks.

  MARNIE

  I don't see anything.

  He adjusts the telescope, prompts her to look again.

  DAD

  I've been staring at this all night.

  MARNIE

  It's really beautiful.

  DAD

  What does it look like?

  MARNIE

  Colour. Fiery colour.

  DAD

  Do you know what it is?

  MARNIE

  …a star is dying.

  DAD

  It'll be doing that for hundreds of hundreds of years. It'll keep dying beyond the deaths of all our friends, everyone we know. But most of the time we can't see it. It's too far, the light's wrong, the earth's orbit is off. But it's pretty amazing, isn't it?

  MARNIE

  I think it's scary.

  DAD

  Me too. But also exciting. But also exhilarating. Because it says that there too, where we think there's fixity, eternity—is mystery. There too, things come into being and pass away.

  MARNIE

  It makes me sad.

  DAD

  Yeah. Me too.

  MARNIE

  …do you really think it'd be all that great to see the stars close up? I mean… do you really think it'd be so different? Like after a few minutes, I mean?

  DAD

  It was what I wanted. I would've practically built my own spaceship to get there.

  MARNIE

  Why didn't you?

  DAD

  What, all by myself?

  He laughs.

  I didn't have the right tools. Good night, sweetie. Go to bed soon.

  He goes inside.

  She gazes up at the stars.

  MARNIE

  He really does seem to love the stars, huh? I thought Dad was just weird, but is it possible he's not weird at all but actually… awesome…?

  She shakes her head furiously.

  No, no, no!

  It's a trap!

  I can't let them trick me into thinking it's okay to be like them! I have to be different! I have to be special! More of a super-human-being than they are! Or else I'll grow up and be—no! There's only one solution! It has to be tonight, tonight! I have to finish building my spaceship and get out of here before the sun's up!

  To Mars! To anywhere but here!

  I'll wait till they're asleep, borrow Alan's radio, and be gone.

  I'm going… I'm going… I'm going…

  4

  Three A.M.

  ALAN's bedroom.

  MARNIE, creeping, singing under her breath, again à la "We're Off to See the Wizard":

  MARNIE

  We're inside Alan's bedroom, in the midd-ddle of the niiiiiight, in the mid-dle, mid-dle, mid-dle, mid-dle middddddle of the night, to borrow to borrow his radio, la la la la, la la la la…

  She spots his radio, glowing like a Holy Grail (or not) above his bed. She leans in, reaches for it, smiles as she has it in her grasp—when she hits a button by accident and the radio turns on and country music blasts out!

  ALAN flies out of bed!

  ALAN

  Thief! Thief!

  The noise draws DAD and MOM; they rush in and see MARNIE!

  DAD

  The thief looks familiar—!

  MOM

  Marnie, what is this—?

  ALAN

  It's three in the morning—!

  MARNIE

  It's nothing! It's… you are still dreeeeeeaammmming…

  ALAN

  I don't think that'll work, Marns.

  MARNIE

  Oh! Eek! Bye!

  She runs away. They wait for her. A moment. She returns.

  Oh hi, everybody! Ah. What's everybody still doing up? It's three in the morning!

  They stare at her.

  MOM

  Explanation, Marnie?

  MARNIE

  Me no speakie English.

  ALAN

  I'm going back to bed.

  MOM

  You woke your brother, Marnie.

  ALAN

  That's okay, I don't sleep anyway, I'm an insomniac, remember? God. People these days.

  MARNIE

  Sorry, Alan.

  ALAN

  Oh, it's not your fault. You're innocent.

  MARNIE

  Thanks, Alan.

  ALAN

  It's the adults who are corrupting what's pure in today's—

  DAD

  Weren't you going back to bed, Alan?

  MOM

  Please, do we have to do this in the middle of the night—?

  ALAN

  My night started three days ago, because I HAVE INSOMNIA, Mom—

  DAD

  Maybe you're falling asleep and dreaming you're still awake—

  ALAN

  Great, Dad, so I'm not an insomniac, I'm just an idiot who can't tell dreams from—

  MARNIE

  Stop stop stop!

  They stop.

  Your interrogation methods are horrible! Okay—I'll show you what I'm doing. But only if you promise you won't make me stop doing it.

  MOM

  Well, what is it you're doing?

  MARNIE

  No, promise me first.

  MOM

  How can we promise if we don't know what the promise entails?

  ALAN

  Mom's a logician, Marnie. It's like a magician, but less fun.

  DAD

  I promise you I'll promise if it's a promiseable promise.

  MARNIE

  And if it isn't?

  DAD

  I promise I'll hope it is.

  ALAN

  Don't worry, Marnie, they'll probably forget about it within a couple of days anyway.

  MOM

  That's not true. Why would you say that?

  ALAN

  Because your short-term memory is starting to fail. It's perfectly natural, if a little sad—

  DAD

  Very nice, Alan—

  MARNIE

  Arrêtez!

  Ils arrêtent.

  Come with me. It's in the basement.

  She leads them into the basement.

  Now, I don't want you to be shocked. Or alarmed! So don't be. It's not what it looks like.

  They stare at her. She goes over to her would-be spaceship and pulls away the sheet that covers it, and…

  Silence.

  Her family doesn't gasp or shout. So MARNIE gasps for them. Dramatically. She looks for a response. Gets none.

  Well?

  Silence.

  So?

  Nothing.

  Sew?

  That is: "sue"?

  MOM

  …it's pronounced "so."

  MARNIE

  Aren't you shocked? Or alarmed?! Ahhhhhh! Ahh.

  ALAN

  What…

  MARNIE

  Yes?

  ALAN

  …oh never mind.

  DAD

  I think what your brother wanted to ask is—

  MOM

  What is it?

  MARNIE

  …what is it?

  DAD

  Yeah.

  MARNIE

  Have
n't you ever seen a spaceship before?

  Silence. They look at her. They look at it. They look at her.

  ALAN

  I'm going back to sleep. Or not sleep.

  MOM

  Me too.

  MARNIE

  But aren't you… upset?

  MOM

  Upset? I'm relieved this is just playing pretend. For a moment there you really had me worried.

  MARNIE

  But… but…

  ALAN

  Send me a postcard from the moon, okay?

  MARNIE

  You're… you're laughing…?

  MOM

  We're not laughing—

  ALAN

  We're laughing a little. It's cute.

  MARNIE

  Cute?

  MOM

  Cute when it's not in a pile that anybody can trip over. We'll keep it over in the corner, okay, Marnie?

  MARNIE

  But I… I… CUTE!?

  MOM

  We'll talk about this when I'm more awake.

  MARNIE

  And you!

  ALAN

  Me?

  MARNIE

  You! I didn't laugh at you, when you told me about your—

  ALAN

  Shh.

  MARNIE

  Your—

  ALAN

  Shh. Okay. Sure.

  MOM

  Your what?

  ALAN

  Yawn. I'm tired. Me no speakie English. Bye bye.

  He leaves.

  MOM

  (to MARNIE) You and I. Conversation about this. Later.

  She goes too.

  MARNIE looks very small, bewildered, defeated. Pause.

  DAD

  You want to build a spaceship?

  MARNIE

  Never mind. I'm just… playing pretend.

  DAD

  But you really want to build a spaceship?

  MARNIE

  Forget it. I'm just being cute.

  DAD

  Because if you were really trying to build a spaceship… maybe I could help. If you tell me why you want to build one.

  MARNIE

  …that's simple. To be independent. To be alone. To be in outer space, where you're happy because you're all on your own, not counting the Martians, and you're not surrounded by grown-ups who…

  DAD

  You don't like it here?

  MARNIE

  No, I do, I do, I think I do, sometimes, but…

  DAD

  But you want to know what it's like to be alone.

  MARNIE

  Yeah.

  DAD

  I understand.

  MARNIE

  You do?

  DAD

  Let's build ourselves a spaceship.

  5

  The next day: Saturday.

  DAD and MARNIE are in the basement. DAD's hard at work on the spaceship, his tool kit beside him. MARNIE watches in gratitude and awe.

 

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