Too Much: A Loveswept Contemporary Erotic Romance (All or Nothing)

by Lea Griffith

  “I never meant to hurt you, Day,” he responded as his hand closed over her own and squeezed.

  “But you did. Do you know how you hurt me?”

  “I didn’t tell you—”

  She shook her head. “You didn’t trust me.”

  “It’s not that I didn’t trust you, Daly. I wanted to protect you.”

  She nodded at that, accepting his belief that that was what he’d been doing. “I understand your thoughts. I was yours, and you felt it your responsibility to control my exposure to the bad things. But while you were protecting me, I was slowly drifting farther and farther from you and you were allowing it to happen. I felt it in your touch, your kiss, the stroke of your flogger on my flesh. It was everywhere and I couldn’t fight it.”

  “That’s not what I was—”

  “Let me finish this. Please, Jeremiah,” she begged.

  He went silent.

  “I thought I was so smart, snooping and putting the pieces together. And my resentment grew. For every piece I managed to connect, I wondered why in the hell you wouldn’t be honest with me. Why wouldn’t the man I loved with all of my heart come to me? You were in danger, Jeremiah. Danger.” Her hand fisted beneath his where it rested over his heart. “You could have been killed, and where would I have been then, Jeremiah?”

  A tear fell and she didn’t bother to dash it away. There was a cleansing to be had here.

  “I heard you talking to Toby the night before I left. You were planning the route the drugs would take, how you’d get them in safely and distributed, and I broke. Something inside me cracked. My man was willing to engage in something illegal to save a brother who had never given a shit about him.”

  “He was still my brother. And ultimately, I never had plans for those drugs to see the light of day.”

  She nodded, and another tear slipped from her eyes. “A fact I didn’t discover until my brother told me the other night, Jeremiah—three years later. And it also affirmed that I made the right decision leaving all those years ago, Jeremiah.”

  He winced and his face went blank. She’d scored him with her truth. So be it.

  “Do you want to know why I feel it was the right decision? Or are you going to shut me out?”

  “Tell me.”

  “You never trusted me enough to give me the truth, Jeremiah. I thought we’d been working toward forever the whole time, but you’d been lying to me.” She held up a hand to cut him off. “Before you start in, your lie came in the form of omission.”

  “It is better to offer no excuse than a bad one,” he said earnestly.

  Anger shot through her. He wasn’t getting her point at all and desperation was creeping in. “George Washington was seriously misguided. It wasn’t an excuse, it was a lie, and a lie by omission cuts just as deeply as one voiced with full intent to mislead. Among other common lies we have the silent lie—the deception which one conveys by simply keeping still and concealing the truth.”

  “Mark Twain,” he said immediately and then quieted. Contemplation danced across his face and finally his gaze met hers, and in his eyes she saw that he was finally beginning to understand.

  “You didn’t trust me to hold you close, to offer you comfort, to give you what you needed as a man. You didn’t trust my counsel, my heart, or my will. You dug yourself up from the gutter, Jeremiah. When I was younger I watched you go through hell trying to stay out of jail, even as you worked for a damn crime syndicate to feed your brother and sister. The same brother who was seeking to drag you back down. And I thought you were willing to dive right back in without even giving me the option of throwing you a lifeline. You took away my rights as the woman who loved you. That’s why I walked away.” Daly pulled her hand from his chest and wiped her eyes. “If I couldn’t trust you to tell me the truth, to love and trust me enough to give it to me, how could I give you all that I was?”

  Jeremiah’s face was tortured and he sat up and turned away from her.

  She sat too and rubbed her face. Daly was tired. This last week with Jeremiah had turned her inside out. And now he’d turned away again.

  She felt him get off the bed and heard the sounds of him pulling on his clothes. Then he was in front her, on his knees, his hands cupping her cheeks, thumbs wiping her tears away.

  “I’m sorry, Daly,” he whispered at her lips. “I’m so fucking sorry.” He grabbed her up and held her close, sitting back down on the bed and leaning against the headboard.

  “I hurt so bad, Jeremiah. I had no choice but to leave because you’d keep hurting me. It was about more than you reverting back to crime. And I didn’t even realize that until my brother told me what really happened.”

  “I should have told you,” he said, and his voice was broken.

  Long moments he held her, stroking her back, doing his best to warm her. Finally, he drew the covers up and pressed them around her, and she tucked her head between his neck and shoulder and cried some more.

  “When you left, it ripped out my heart.”

  She raised her head at that. He shuddered and closed his eyes. “Do you know what my greatest lesson from leaving you is, Jeremiah?”

  He shook his head and stroked her cheek.

  “That I didn’t trust you enough either.”

  His eyes flared and moisture played on his lashes. Her great big Dom had tears in his eyes.

  “I never once stopped to look past my own sense of betrayal to try to understand the why of it all. Once Toby told me everything, it clicked. I hadn’t trusted you enough to believe that no matter what happened, you’d hold me down, keep me safe, and give me everything you could once you were able. I didn’t trust that you loved me because you’d never given me the words. But what’s so crazy is that I didn’t even realize I didn’t need the words. I should have trusted in the way you handled my body. Every touch should have reminded me that you held me closer than you held yourself.”

  “Please don’t,” he pleaded.

  “I left because I was afraid. I’ve always been afraid and now, Jeremiah, I’m not.” Daly leaned up then, watching emotion break across his face. Pain, love, hope—they tracked back and forth, and all she wanted to do was remove that.

  “I am the one to blame, Daly. Because at the end of the day, I let you go. Yes, I was hurt. But nothing should have ever kept me from confiding in you. My only excuse is that I didn’t want any of my brother’s shit to touch you. And my greatest regret, Daly, has always been that I didn’t give you the words you needed. That I didn’t take the time to prove to you how much you meant to me.”

  Daly felt his words in her soul and she buried her face in his neck again, wrapping her arms around his shoulders, trying to crawl into him.

  “When I saw David’s ring on my doorstep, I panicked. All I could think was … again? It took me ten times of punching in your listed number before I hit dial. And then you wouldn’t call me back. I knew then, Jeremiah, that I’d have to see you.”

  There was a rumble in his chest. “You did right coming to me. I’m a stubborn man, but nowhere near as stubborn as my woman.”

  He pulled her away and lifted her chin so she’d meet his gaze. Butterflies took flight, a million of them, at the look in his eyes.

  “I would have come for you. It has taken a force of will I didn’t know I possessed to stay away as long as I have. You held my heart, took it with you, and I needed it back, so I could give it to you properly,” he said softly.

  He dropped his forehead to hers, and there they remained for long minutes. Holding each other, breathing the same air, and basking in the softness of forgiveness.

  “I love you,” he said clearly.

  “I love you,” she returned immediately.

  He kissed the tip of her nose. “Now there are things you need to know, because I’m hardheaded but even Jeremiah Copeland can learn his lessons.”

  Chapter 25

  “That sounds kinda ominous, Jeremiah,” Daly said nervously.

  Don’t lick your
lips. She did.

  “You’re making me hard and we need to finish this. I know you’re wondering what the hell is going on and I need to tell you what I know.” He got up and set her on the bed, afraid that if he continued to hold her he’d fuck her before he could tell her what he needed to say.

  “Stop pacing,” she said with a smile in her voice.

  He stopped and turned to her, hoping the look on his face conveyed how much he wanted to sink inside her body. It must have, because her face softened and she licked her lips. Again.

  Copeland took a deep breath. Get it out and get it over with. “You know that David is in trouble again. He’s being blackmailed again. But he’s not the ultimate target.”

  “The ring on my doorstep was my first clue he was in trouble.”

  Copeland nodded. “I’m sure. What you don’t know is that at the root of it lies my relationship with you.”

  Her eyes widened and her mouth fell open. He gave her a minute to process what he’d said and as he’d suspected, she had something to say. “We weren’t together when the ring showed up.”

  He crossed his arms over his chest and nodded again. “You’re right. I’m thinking it was intended to bring us back together.” He held up his hand to stop her next words. “I don’t know the motivation simply because I don’t know who’s at the heart of all this.”

  Copeland winced internally, struggling with his decision to keep his suspicions to himself. There was something at play here and he was terrified it would come crashing down around his head. Neither Daly nor Toby needed to know what it was unless it was absolutely essential.

  “What I do know is that someone knows exactly what happened three years ago, and they’re using it to leverage my brother and get to me.”

  “You didn’t do anything three years ago,” she immediately responded, biting her lip.

  He rubbed his chest. She managed to undo him every time. He’d hurt her and she still had faith in him. “I played a game with a drug dealer and ultimately it resulted in his death. I dabbled in things I shouldn’t have and no matter my reason, someone wants the truth to come out.”

  Fear etched her face, and he wanted to grab her up but refrained.

  “My problem with all of this is not how it will impact me, but how it will touch you.”

  Something slithered through her gaze and Copeland wondered at the darkness there, but she cut off his inquiry. “How could it touch me?”

  “Your association with me could destroy you, Daly. I may be a reformed bad boy, but if anyone finds out what happened three years ago, it will do more than touch you. It could destroy the name you’ve managed to build for yourself.”

  “I think you’re reaching too far for an explanation. I don’t think this has anything to do with me at all. But I think it has everything in the world to do with you.”

  He ran a hand through his hair. “Whoever this is specifically told David to leave the ring at your doorstep. That night we played at The Underground, someone called and left a message that indirectly referenced you. Nobody else being played that night met the description given—that’s why Savvy was there. So don’t tell me this doesn’t involve you, Daly. It most assuredly does.”

  “Where were you tonight?” she asked and turned a gimlet eye on him.

  “With Toby, trying to get to the bottom of this,” he answered shortly.

  “Well, you don’t have bite my head off. I didn’t leave the damn ring,” she responded heatedly.

  He glanced up at her as he sat on the edge of the bed. She’d pulled on his T-shirt and looked fucking adorable with her long, wavy mink-colored hair in disarray around her shoulders. Her nipples were hard, pushing the outline of her piercings against the thick cotton of the shirt. How he fucking wanted her.

  “Baby, it ain’t your head I want to bite,” he said through clenched teeth.

  She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at him. “This is important, Jeremiah,” she said dramatically. “Did you find out anything new tonight?”

  He’d initiated this conversation, intent on giving her as much information as he could, but he found his stomach souring. Copeland had a really bad feeling about all of this. The pieces were too neat. Only one other person besides Copeland had access to the information from that night. And Copeland had a meeting with him tomorrow.

  But he could not tell the woman who made his heart beat this. Not right now. Not until he had confirmation.

  “No, nothing that would help. I have another meeting tomorrow. I’m hoping that clears things up and I can put this behind us.”

  “David has no idea who’s doing this?”

  “None. Believe me, if he did he’d have told me.” Copeland knew it for a fact. His brother had always been a pain in the ass but contrary to Daly’s assertion, David had a good heart. He was fallible, easily led astray, but his heart was good. Copeland didn’t doubt it, even though he wanted to wring his neck.

  “Then all we can do is wait?”

  She sounded scared, and that was the last thing Copeland wanted her feeling. He walked over to the bed, stepped out of his jeans, and reached for the hem of her T-shirt. Pulling it over her head, he put his knee between hers and pressed her back. Her gaze locked on his and he read her so clearly then. Lust, need, and love—it was all right there. All Copeland had to do was reach out and grab it.

  So that’s what he did. He lost himself in her and prayed she did the same. Tomorrow he’d have answers. Tonight he’d have her.

  * * *

  He was distracting her with his body. Daly sighed inside because she’d kept something from him. He’d opened the door with honesty, giving her as much information as he had, and she’d kept the pictures from him.

  As he licked the valley between her breasts and sank deep inside her body, rolling his hips in the cradle of hers, she let herself go.

  Tomorrow she’d have time to show him the pictures. Tonight she’d have him.

  Chapter 26

  An alarm woke Daly and she panicked. What day was it? Tuesday? She glanced at the clock and saw that, yes, it was in fact six A.M. on Tuesday. The lights in the bedroom were low but the smell of bacon wafted in the air, and she pushed her hair out of her face, searching for her shirt.

  She located it on the floor. Then, slipping it over her head, she walked out to the living room. Daly found Jeremiah in the kitchen frying bacon. He had on those same jeans and a University of Georgia T-shirt. He looked delicious.

  “I sent Toby to your house for clothes,” he said without turning around.

  She groaned and hung her head in her hands. “Let me guess—you stole my key.”

  He didn’t respond.

  “I hope you told him to just go with something black.”

  He chuckled. “You don’t trust your brother to pick out your clothes.”

  It was her turn to remain silent. He turned around before he grabbed a mug and filled it with coffee. He slid it down the counter to her and she smiled weakly.

  Daly was not a morning person. Waking without Jeremiah in the bed had kinda set her mood for the day. Maybe the coffee would help.

  He didn’t say another word to her until she’d consumed the first cup, and then it was just to say, “Here’s another one,” as he refilled it.

  She drank it, feeling more normal but watching the clock tick down her time with Jeremiah. “I’ll miss you today,” she heard come out of her mouth.

  He pulled the last of the bacon out of the pan and turned the stove off. “I hope you do.”

  Daly felt the thrill of his words, as much a declaration of his own anxiety as a taunt to pull her out of her funk. Her man was funny that way. And she loved him.

  “You’ll call me when you know something?” Daly couldn’t keep her own nervousness from leaking through.

  “Eat, baby, and don’t worry about anything. I’m going to drop you off at work once we’re ready and … there’s your brother,” he said as he passed her a plate heaped with bacon, eggs,
and grits.

  “Is there sugar in these grits?” she asked irritably.

  He snickered. “Is there any other way to fix ’em, woman?”

  She couldn’t answer because her mouth was full of crispy bacon, fluffy eggs, and deliciously sweet grits.

  It took about ten minutes to polish off the amazing breakfast her man had cooked for her. It turned out her brother wasn’t half bad at rifling through her clothes and picking out something that matched for her to wear to work. She’d thank him later, she thought to herself as she watched Jeremiah dry off and begin dressing.

  He really was a gorgeous man, and as she watched him shrug into a white silk dress shirt and put on a red tie, she couldn’t help but lift up a prayer of thanks. Her man. She was grateful for whatever had brought them back together but offered another silent prayer that whatever was going on didn’t tear them back apart.

  Her stomach knotted and she pushed the feeling of impending doom down deep. She looked up and found him watching her. “Bathroom’s yours, Day.”

  Daly lifted the T-shirt over her head and enjoyed the way his gray eyes flared blue. She pranced by him, no other word for it, swinging her hips a little extra and loving the way his breath drew in as she walked by.

  She did not expect the sharp spank on her ass, though it heated her immediately. “Promises, promises, Mr. Copeland.”

  “Oh, I’m going to have that ass soon, Ms. Edwards. Believe that,” he murmured.

  “And I’m going to enjoy the hell out of it,” she tossed back as she jumped in the shower.

  One hour later, Jeremiah dropped her off with a hot kiss and the assurance that he’d call her soon.

  That call never came, and by four thirty she was a mess. Was he okay? What was happening? Why hadn’t he called her? She drove home and had just made it there when her cell phone rang. She didn’t bother looking at the display, just picked it up and said, “Hello.”

  “Dalia, it’s your father.”

  Her heart dropped and she knocked her head against the steering wheel. He’d been calling her for days and she’d avoided him. Her time had run out. “What do you want, Heyward?”