…
“Hey,” I said as I sat down in the chair opposite her. She barely glanced up as she offered her own barely audible hello. I cleared my throat and leaned back, trying to look as casual as possible. “What are you working on?”
“French.”
My brows puckered and I looked down, too focused on her before to notice the very obvious foreign language textbook sprawled out in front of her. “I didn’t know you were taking French. Are you fluent?”
“No, I’m not fluent… yet,” she said, all the while keeping her eyes trained between her book and the paper she was writing on. Grinding my teeth, I leaned forward, no longer interested in taking this easy, especially if she wouldn’t even look at me. My fingers gripped the edge of her textbook before roughly shutting it and sliding it toward me.
Her eyes lifted, narrowing and trying to pin me to my spot. “Give it back.” She made no move to grab it from me, she simply set her pen down and crossed her arms.
“No.”
“No?” Naomi laughed but it lacked humor. “What are we? Twelve? Are you going to start pulling my hair and pushing me down in the sandbox?”
Smirking, I said, “You like it when I pull your hair, so that wouldn’t be much of a punishment, would it?”
I expected her to growl. Narrow her eyes. Cuss me out. Something. I wasn’t prepared for her cold eyes to remain so lifeless. I lowered my voice as I scooted even closer. “Naomi, I’m sorry about your mother. I know—”
“I’m fine,” she interrupted. “If you’re looking for someone to console, go find Derek. Or Mark. Or pretty much anyone else in this hospital, because I’m fine.” As she picked up her pen and started writing once more, still sans textbook, I saw movement from over her shoulder. Alara was standing by the door with a worried expression, her gaze pinned to the back of Naomi’s head. I shifted my eyes back before Naomi noticed.
“We both know that’s not true.”
She scoffed. “Based on what?”
“Based on the fact that you’re acting like you’re okay.”
Even though her head was tilted down, I could still make out the incredulity on her face. “So because it appears I’m okay I must not be okay?”
“You forgot a key word there, sweetheart. Acting.”
Naomi looked unimpressed and bored as she started working once more. I growled in my head, frustrated with her dismissal of me.
“You’re an addict, too,” I threw out.
She froze, her pen hovering in midair. “What?” I heard a crack in her voice, the first sign something was penetrating her cold demeanor.
“You heard me. You are just as much of an addict as she is. But your addiction is control. And now that you realize you don’t have it, you’re shutting the fuck down.”
“Damien.” Her tone was leveled once more but there was an underlying hint of anger.
“And that control will ruin you just as easily as drugs are ruining her,” I continued like she hadn’t spoken, bulldozing through her mask of stoicism. “Like right now. You can use it to push people away, to push me away. You can let it destroy you.”
“I am not my mother.” Forcefully closing her notebook, she moved to stand when a throat cleared nearby. Both our heads spun toward the sound, where Alara was standing at the head of the table. I hadn’t even seen her move, too focused on the girl in front of me.
“Derek wanted me to come get you. Sherry’s here, and he thinks the doctor might be coming out soon.” I nodded and started to stand while Naomi slowly put her belongings into her bag. I shoved her textbook toward her.
“You can leave,” she said as she swung her backpack over her shoulders. Alara’s eyes widened and shifted between us. She opened her mouth to talk, but I spoke first.
“And why would I do that?” I asked casually.
“Because there’s no reason for you to be here?” She was looking at me like I was crazy, and it took everything inside me not to grab her and crash my lips down onto hers. But if she wanted to play dumb and unaffected, I could too.
“Even so, I think I’ll stay.”
“I. Don’t. Want. You. Here. Do you understand that?”
“Naomi…” Alara cautioned as she threw me another nervous glance. “Stop it.”
She glared at her friend. “You want him here?”
Alara stood a little taller as she said, “Mm-hmm.”
“Well that was convincing.” Naomi gathered up the last of her things and moved around the table. “Seriously, Damien. Go home. I don’t need you.”
I grabbed her arm and halted her progress before bending down and whispering, “I’m not leaving you. I don’t care what you do or say. I’m. Not. Leaving.” The last words came out harsh as I leaned back and took her hand. She resisted until she saw me reach into my pocket and pull out her necklace. Naomi froze as her wide eyes bored into it. Opening her palm, I gently placed the piece of jewelry into it and closed her fingers around it.
“You may not need your mother… and you may not need me. But we need you. Think about that.”
…
I slumped down next to Gabe, both of us looking at the three girls down the hall. Alara and a newcomer—Sherry, I learned—were trying to distract Naomi as we waited for the doctor. Derek and Mark were both standing off on their own.
“I’ve never…” Gabe trailed off as his gaze moved to the wall across from us.
“What?” I asked, my eyes still on Naomi. She hadn’t looked over once, and she hadn’t spoken to me since we left the cafeteria an hour ago.
“I haven’t known her long, less than a year. But she’s one of those people that reel you in, ya know? Makes you feel like you’ve been friends forever, like you know everything about her.” I knew exactly what he meant. I knew she was special. “It’s easy to forget that you don’t,” he finished.
“I know her,” I said roughly.
I could practically feel his smirk. “Well I’m sure our relationships with her are a tad different.”
“Our relationships better damn well be more than a tad different.” I looked over and threw him a smile to soften my words. Gabe laughed and sunk further into his chair. He looked around and quickly sobered up.
“My point is, I’ve never seen her like this. She has an opinion on everything. I’ve never seen her numb to anything.”
“She’s just scared.”
“That doesn’t make it easier to watch, in fact… I think it might make it harder.” I set my eyes on the girl in question and while yes, it was hard to watch, I didn’t feel discouraged by it.
“Derek?” a soft voice said from my left.
I looked over to find a brunette moving quickly down the hallway. Her brown hair was tied into a tight ponytail on top of her head and she wore black capris and a simple white T-shirt. The classic style was topped off with black flats.
Naomi’s brother looked her way, his face flooding with relief. “Sam,” he murmured. As soon as she was close enough, they melded against one another. I couldn’t even tell who reached for who first. They just came together like that was what they were meant to do.
A few seconds passed before they pulled away, still standing close and still connected by her hand on his upper arm and his hand on her waist.
“His girlfriend?” I asked Gabe, who had been shifting around.
“Not yet,” he muttered. I gave him a strange look. “She’s my sister.”
Brows raised, I said, “Ahhh… and he’s not good enough for her?”
Gabe shook his head. “No, it’s not that. He’s my best friend—besides Alara, of course—and he’s a good guy. I’m always gonna worry about her, but I trust him. I’ve told him as much so I’m not really sure what’s stopping them, they’ve been dancing around this for a while.”
I opened my mouth to respond when—
“The family of Julie Donahue?”
An echoed “yes” resounded throughout the room as Mark, Derek, and Naomi acknowledged the approaching doctor.
Gabe and I stood up and walked toward them.
“I’m Dr. Sinclair, I’ve been attending to Ms. Donahue this evening.”
“Is she all right?” Mark asked, not even feigning a calm demeanor.
With a solemn nod, the doctor responded, “Yes. We had to pump her stomach due to the alcohol poisoning. But barring any complications, she should be fine.” Another collective reaction, a sigh, went through the group as if we were feeling everything at once.
“Any drugs?” Mark gulped as he voiced the barely audible question.
Dr. Sinclair’s brows furrowed as she looked down at her clipboard, flipping a few pages before tucking it under her arm and looking at Mark. “Ms. Donahue’s tox screens came back completely clear.”
“What…” Derek cleared his throat before stepping forward, his hand wrapped tightly around one of Sam’s. “What are you saying?”
“Ms. Donahue didn’t have any drugs present in her system.”
We were all silent as we stared at the doctor. Derek was the first to break into a relieved smile, and everyone else followed quickly. But Naomi merely stared, like she was waiting for the punch line to a joke or for the rug to be pulled out from beneath her.
“None?” she asked, a hard edge to her voice. “No drugs of any kind, at all?”
“That is correct, ma’am. Now if you’ll excuse me I have other patients to attend to. If you have any more questions feel free to ask the nurses, or have them page me.” With a quick nod, the doctor turned and briskly walked down the hall. Everyone began hugging and talking as Derek noticed Naomi’s still detached mood.
“This is a good thing, Naomi. She didn’t use,” Derek said as he squeezed her shoulder.
“I know.”
“Then why do you look like someone just used the word ‘affect’ incorrectly?”
She gave him an incredulous look. “I saw the drugs there.”
“And obviously she didn’t take them,” he said slowly, like he failed to see the problem.
“Why the hell would she even have them in the first place if she hadn’t considered using them?” she asked.
“Naomi—”
She held up her hand to cut her brother off. “You know what, don’t bother. I have stuff to finish.” She shouldered her bag and stalked toward the exit. In a few quick strides, I was shoving through the door and calling her name.
Damn, she walks fast.
She stopped in the middle of the sidewalk but stayed looking forward. I placed my hand gently on her shoulder before turning her around until she was chest to chest with me. I framed her face with my hands and dropped featherlight kisses on her lips. One. Two. Three. All of them went unreturned.
“I’m sorry about your mother.”
“I don’t want to talk about her.” Naomi pulled back completely until we were no longer touching before starting toward her car.
“Where are we going?” I asked as I came up beside her.
“I’m going home. I have no idea where you’re going.”
I shrugged and shoved my hands in my pockets. “Well, that’s easy. I’m going wherever you’re going.”
Her glare would have made lesser men shrivel. “No, you’re not.” I said nothing as we continued across the parking lot and to her car. She paused next to it, abandoning her fob in favor of manually opening only her door.
“Naomi,” I warned with a growl. I could see her calculating how much abandoning me in this parking lot would piss me off. But that contemplative look only lasted a second before she yanked open her door and threw her stuff into the backseat. I was glaring at her through the passenger side window as the engine rumbled to life. But she didn’t see it, because she never looked my way. And a minute later I was left standing alone in the parking lot, watching her taillights fade into the distance.
I hadn’t seen or spoken to Naomi since last night. But after talking to Alara, I guessed no one had. She didn’t go back to her apartment, she didn’t go to Derek’s, and Mark said she never returned to the hospital.
So where the fuck had she gone?
I drove around this morning and tried to think of every place she’d mentioned in the past few months, no matter how inconsequential the place seemed, but they were all a bust.
Ellie was sitting on the couch when I walked through the front door a few hours later. She was burrowed under a blanket as she laughed at the television.
“How was the date? I’m surprised you guys didn’t wake me up when you came home. Did you strike out?” she asked playfully before bringing a spoonful of cereal to her mouth. I softly shut the door and she glanced up, her smile falling when she took in my expression. “What’s wrong?” she quickly asked as she turned off the TV and put her “lunch” on the coffee table.
I rubbed a hand down my face before asking, “Naomi didn’t happen to stop by here, did she?” I didn’t know why I asked, I knew she wouldn’t and Ellie all but confirmed it by asking how the date was.
“No,” she answered slowly. “D, what the heck happened? You’re freaking me out.”
Running my hands through my hair, I tugged on the ends before dropping to the couch. “Her mom’s in the hospital. Alcohol poisoning.” I looked up at Ellie’s sharp intake of breath.
“Her mother’s an… I didn’t know…”
I shook my head. “Heroin addict. I guess she figured drinking until she blacked out would stop her from using. Naomi found her yesterday.” My eyes closed on a pained sigh. I hated that she had to walk in on that, I couldn’t imagine coming home and finding Ellie like that. I also hated that she never even thought to call me.
“Hey,” Ellie said softly as she sat down next to me, her hand on her extended stomach. I gave her a sad smile and threw my arm around her shoulders.
“How is she?” she asked softly.
Not knowing whether she was asking about Naomi or her mom, I said, “The doctor said her mother will be fine. Naomi, on the other hand…”
“She didn’t handle it well?”
I let out a humorless laugh, and my sister worried her bottom lip. She had come to care about Naomi almost as much as I had. “She handled it fine. She was doing her fucking homework.”
“Oh. So she’s really upset?”
I smiled sadly. “Yeah, Ells. And I have no clue where she is.”
Her hair tickled my chin as she snuggled closer. “What do you think will happen to her?”
“Naomi will be fine. I’ll make sure of it. We just—”
“Not her. Her mom.”
“Well, the doctor said she’d be fine—”
“No, not that,” she interrupted once more, raising up off my chest and placing her palms on her stomach for balance. “I mean… even though she didn’t actually take the drugs, she still had them there, right? That’s got to be a felony or something?”
I frowned. “I don’t know, Ells. No one really said anything about it. Naomi just said she saw them. But there weren’t cops there and if the paramedics had found heroin they probably would’ve called them.”
My sister was silent for several minutes as she thought it over. “Maybe… maybe we could call Grayson and have him check it out?”
My brow furrowed. That wasn’t necessarily something we needed to do, I could easily talk to Alara or Gabe, who most certainly knew what was going on. But there was a longing in her voice. My sister said she’d pulled back from talking to Grayson in the last week since our talk. And even though it’d only been seven days, I knew how attached my sister got to people. If she and Grayson had been hanging out or talking with any kind of regularity, she’d have to be going a little crazy without it.
“I never said you had to stop talking to him,” I reminded her. I was still cursing myself for that talk. Because now she felt like she couldn’t even be friends with the guy.
“I know.” She averted her eyes. “But you were right. I need to start focusing on my son. On what’s best for him.”
“You need to be happy, too.”
Jesus. I was probably giving her whiplash with my back and forth. I knew I was driving myself insane. I wanted whatever would make her happy, but was I ready to let go and let her figure out what that might be? Part of me still thought no, absolutely not. But a bigger part of me knew I’d always feel that way to some degree. So as hard as it was, I had to let her do this.
“Ells, I’m sorry I’ve been so domineering about… well, about everything. I’m scared.” I looked over at her. Really seeing her. Not her addiction, not her past, just her, who she was right now.
Lucid expression. An appropriately filled-out form from eating right. Healthy, glowing skin from drinking enough water and no booze. Clean hair. Clean clothes. Just… put together.
Ready.
“Grayson is your friend. Or maybe he’s more, but that’s your decision, not mine. I’ll support whatever you decide.”
She gave me a warm smile. “Thanks, D. But it takes more than one person to make that decision.”
“I have faith in you.” I shouldn’t be smiling right now. I didn’t know where my girlfriend was, and her mother was still in the hospital, but at least I could be grateful for the part of my life that was working out.
In order to stay sane, I had to celebrate this little win.
“I’ll give him a call… and I’ll also let him know he’ll be hearing from you.” I smiled as I messed up her hair.
“You really don’t—”
I cut her off with a look as I grabbed my phone, quickly finding his contact and hitting dial. As always, he picked up on the first ring. But instead of his customary and calm “Officer Grayson” greeting I’d gotten used to, he sounded panicked.
“Damien? Is everything okay? Is Ellie okay?” Grayson answered. My eyebrows rose at the very personal reception. I glanced over at my sister, who was nervously sitting on the edge of the couch. Her bottom lip pulled between her teeth, making it clear she hadn’t heard him.
“She’s fine,” I said slowly, and Ellie’s brows rose in surprise even while her face lit up with happiness. “It’s about something else.”
Unveiling Chaos Page 24
