H When Hell Is the Favourable Option......

by David C Jaundrell

  When the all the seats were full two large snarling, spitting wolves were sent through the tunnel, moved on by electric prods which had the desired affect but also made them extremely pissed off. They prowled around the cage, their enormous fangs bared and saliva dripping from their mouths. Suddenly, huge applause erupted and two, what looked like European ‘boys’ but were more than likely in their twenties, appeared through a small entrance in the crowd. They raised their arms triumphantly and stood by the cage door.

  The boys were twins. What was this all about? Three men went round the crowd taking bets.

  ‘What are we betting on?’ asked Hathaway.

  ‘How long before the wolves die’ the Russian replied.

  Hathaway looked at the boys and then at the wolves. ‘How long before the boys die’ he corrected.

  The man smiled. ‘No….’

  ‘What weapons are they given?’

  The man smiled again ‘No weapons’

  Hathaway was lost. What was going on? Here he was in Vietnam about to watch two young men eaten by wolves and the idiot next to him was betting on how soon the wolves would die? He shook his head in disbelief. Suddenly he felt tired and knew his days of coming to these far off uncivilised places had now finished. It was too much…..

  A gong sounded. All the bets had been placed and with one last triumphal fist pump the men let themselves into the cage. Hathaway's mind was now struggling between total disbelief and incredulity.

  Why had they let themselves in? Let themselves in??????

  Were they drugged?

  Why were they smiling?

  What was going on?

  The men had hardly got into the cage when one of the wolves launched itself through the air. Its huge jaws were open and head high. Just as it was about to envelope the man's head he moved. The move was hardly noticeable; it wasn't a lurch to one side or the other but a subtle shift of weight in a semi circular direction. A classic eastern defence and attack move. The slight change moved his body from full on to the wolf to sideways and as the wolf's jaws moved past his face he grabbed its grey white main with both hands and continued to help accelerate the wolfs velocity towards the cage bars. Its head hit the side of the cage with such force that it went in between the bars and stuck. The man braced his legs and with all his might pushed the wolfs body parallel with the bars and a loud crack could be heard as its neck broke and it's body dropped down, and hung there; held in the bars by it's trapped head. Its enormous body twitched several times as it gave up to death and then it was still.

  The man raised his arm and the crowd roared and took a quick look at their watches. Hathaway was transfixed. He had never seen anything like it. And he had seen many depraved things; far too many………but this was different….

  The other male wolf held back; its uncertainty clear. It was the smaller of the two although not by much and the alpha male had attacked first. The second wolf knew it was in danger and should attack but the alpha male had unexpectedly succumbed to a two foot which had put confusion into its head. It knew from experience that its older brother could easily kill a two foot and it was unsure why he had been defeated? He knew a two foot could kill but only when there was a stick in its hands that made a loud noise! They kept away from two foots with sticks………

  It stood there, it's large mouth open, its vicious fangs exposed as it weighed up the options; attack or crouch down and cower?

  Win or lose?

  Live or die?

  Respect the power of the other and back off …..or fight, win and be Alpha Male! It took only a second to reach a conclusion. With the alpha male dead there was a vacancy…….

  As the wolf launched himself through the air at the two foot killer of his brother the other man punched his rear thigh and his body turned in the air and hit the cage. For the split second that it took to get the wind back in its lungs and resume the attack the man had smashed the wolf in the windpipe with his fist. The wolf screamed in pain, then the scream became muted as its throat swelled, cutting off the air. As the wolf tried desperately to breathe the other man stood over it and with two hands raised above his head he smashed them down into the base of its skull and broke its neck……….

  The men looked at each other, put one arm with a clenched fist across their chest in a gladiatorial salute then raised both arms into the air and let out a long high primeval scream. The crowd went wild with cheering and clapping, stamping their feet and hammering on the boards. They had never seen it like this. It was usually longer and bloodier…….. but always the same result. The winners in the crowd scrambled to the official timekeeper to show their tickets and get their money.

  Once a week for a month for three years they had watched the boys do this and it was magnificent. They had fought men, bears, wolves, a full grown bull and once several women. The women, who belonged to a karate club, were convinced that six of them could take the twins down.

  There were two rules…

  One was that they could kill the men but the men could not kill the women. The other rule was that if ever the women talked they would be killed by their own people. The men won and the women lived – just. Two could never conceive again, one lost an eye, another spent the rest of her life in a wheelchair and one more unfortunately threatened to tell and was killed – rules are rules.

  The twins were not interested who they fought; only that they fought. This time they had been lucky and they knew it. Both wolves had jumped which made them very vulnerable and although it looked spectacular it made the boys job a lot easier.

  As the crowd started to leave Hathaway managed to get to the twins. ‘Who are you? Where are you from?

  ‘English…….’ Said one in a slightly upper class English accent.

  ‘Who are you?’ asked Hathaway again.

  The twins both shrugged. It was none of Hathaway's business.

  ‘I'm not prying’ said Hathaway ‘so just tell me one thing….why do you do this? No one makes you….why do you do this?’

  They grinned. ‘Its fun, it pays very well…………..it's our holiday.

  Hathaway persuaded them to join him for dinner that evening and after a general chat he said ‘If you think that is fun, and I think by that you mean exciting and adrenalin provoking, I have a suggestion for you………’

  They said they would get back to him in due course and several months later they did.

  Hathaway made the arrangements.

  They spent two months with Hamas, one month with the Syrian Intelligence Agency and two months in Iran with Hezbollah. Their natural aggression was now complemented with an understanding of bomb making, poisoning, surveillance and modern weaponry. They were now trained assassins. Hathaway bought them two homes; one in England and one in Spain and the twins would spend a month at each separately and then swap. To their neighbours they were one person; which was exactly as Hathaway wanted it. Should there ever be a problem with a sighting whichever twin was involved could be swapped for the other and the alibi would be complete.

  Hathaway rented them out to high paying customers. Coincidentally the trainers used them. The Syrians, Hamas, Hezbollah all had enemies in Europe and one or two were neutralised. Hathaway also did the odd job for the IRA and one for ETA. They even did one job for North Korea. It was very lucrative and it gave the twins danger and high adrenalin situations…… but they missed the physical violence.

  ‘…………. and it ought to be called a wanker engine not a Wankel’

  And that appeared to settle the technical merits of an alternative combustion engine. Hathaway went to a cupboard and took two small packages from it. He gave one to each man and said ‘Happy Birthday’. Opening the packages the twins found the thirty thousand pound Patek Phillipe Perpetual Calendar watches gleaming up at them.

  ‘Thank you Ernest’ they said in unison ‘thank you’

  Ernest was grateful for their appreciation. These boys who had started off as a business proposition he now saw more as sons a
nd they saw him as a father.

  H Chapter 19

  Bogotá Butterflies

  H and Benny went in to Bogotá to find something that H was after. Driven in early they had spent a while trying to find the right kind of place. In a side street just off the main drag H found it.

  ‘Look’ he said pointing at the walls. ‘Bingo!’

  He would liked to have said ‘fucking bingo!’ but he tried not to swear in front of Benny. On the walls were glass cases full of dead butterflies. He went to an assistant and said ‘How much?’

  The man looked at him blankly and H said again ‘How much?’

  ‘Perdone señor?’

  Benny came across and took over. ‘It's not Harrods James and they don't speak English. Now which one did you want to buy?’

  ‘All of them’

  She started to say something in Spanish then abruptly stopped. ‘Pardon? What are you going to do with this lot? Where will we put them?’

  H smiled. ‘They're not for us, they're for Arthur……so get a price for the lot delivered to England care of Mr Harry Evans, The Enclosure……..’

  She talked to the man in Spanish who immediately called out to his boss. Benny explained it again and he nodded continually and gesticulated to the walls at which point it was Benny's turn to nod. She turned to H. ‘All of them…..you're sure?’

  H nodded to Benny. Benny nodded to the Boss who smiled and nodded back. He spoke to her for a moment then she said ‘Did you know that Colombia has……’ she said something in Spanish and he repeated it slightly differently ‘three and a half thousand diurnal and forty five thousand nocturnal species of butterflies. Fascinating eh…….? And I never knew…what a dull life I've led’

  Leaving the shop with nothing left to sell she led James to the Monserrate; the mountain in the heart of Bogota city.

  Look’ she said pointing and James saw the church situated incongruously on its summit. ‘If we go up the views are spectacular’

  There were two ways up; cable car and climb via a long and quite arduous stairway. Benny wanted the cable car and H wanted the stairway as he decided he really needed some exercise.

  At the top a cool Benny waited for the hot, sweaty and panting James who said between huge lungfuls of air ‘Easy’.

  ‘When you have finished using up all the air the locals were hoping to breathe look at the views; aren't they magnificent!’

  James agreed. The views of the city with the rich quarter in all its glory and the down at heel parts that so desperately needed money; and maybe just a touch of hope.

  As they looked at the views Benny felt a bump on her side.

  ‘Pardone Senorita’ said the smart, casually dressed man who smiled, nodded and continued on his way.

  ‘Look’ said Benny ‘aren't the Andes magnificent….?

  H looked at the snow capped peaks and agreed. They were indeed magnificent. Going up to the sky………..

  The casually dressed man had walked about fifty yards when the two men attached themselves to each side of him. Strong hands held his arms and he felt the hard steel of the gun muzzle in his ribs. He tried to say something in protestation but one of the men put a finger to his lips and he immediately shut up. Taking him over to a small wall on the outer fringe of the sightseers, Amond held out his hand. The man made no attempt to put anything in it.

  ‘What's your name?’ asked Amond

  He said nothing. H would have known instinctively what was coming next but the casually dressed man was used to talking his way out of anything but he just needed a bit of time to weigh things up……..let them talk; give me some clues……..? The fist caught him in the solar plexus and the air left his body to be replaced by a dreadful pain. He tried to drop to the floor but they held him straight to increase the pain. Vomit went down his shirt but they kept holding him. Amond looked to the sightseers to see if anyone was watching and saw a lady looking inquisitive.

  ‘Alcohol’ volunteered Amond

  She smiled and shrugged. It was certainly a hot day. A day for too much cold beer…..

  They gave him a few moments. ‘What's your name?’ asked Amond again.

  ‘Philippe’ gasped their still breathless captive.

  ‘Philippe’ said Amond ‘you have something that belongs to a friend of ours….you should give it to us before you accidentally go over this wall and bounce off the cliffs to your death……’

  Philippe took the purse out of a compartment within his loose shirt and gave it to Amond.

  ‘You are a stupid man Philippe’ said Amond ‘very stupid’

  He nodded to his partner who held Philippe's hand and with one slash of a knife he severed the finger tendons to leave a right hand that would never be of use again….. And to make sure he didn't transfer his pick pocketing dexterity to his other hand he slashed the tendons in that as well. This time they let him drop, whimpering to the ground and walked away.

  Benshima felt a light tap on her shoulder. She looked round at the man but took a moment before she said anything ‘Good morning Amond, how are you?’

  ‘Very good Senorita Reyes. Thank you. And I hope you are well?’

  ‘Yes Amond. Thank you………’

  ‘I think you may have dropped your purse Senorita. It was on the ground by you…….’

  She looked into his eyes……. ‘Thank you Amond…….you did well to spot it’

  He nodded then melted back into the crowd….

  H looked some more but after a while one view blended into the next and he had had enough. H was more a doer than a looker. As they were leaving he bought Benny a cheap but beautiful necklace from one of the artesanias that plied their trade there.

  The next day a large Mercedes, with escort, took them and Senor and Senora Reyes to the airport for the flight to England. At the departure gate H shook Senor Reyes hand. ‘Thank you for your hospitality sir. I have enjoyed and appreciated it very much’

  ‘You are welcome; but please there is no need to call me sir. My name is Jose. Please call me Jose’.

  ‘Thank you sir’ said H as the flight was called………’

  H Chapter 20

  Rico

  Later the next evening H was back in England. He called Toby to get the location of his guests and told him to arrange for a meeting at ten the next morning. Benny was tired and had a bit of a cold so went to bed early leaving H free to chase Rico. He pressed the button on the front of the computer; it hummed into life and the two monitors flickered. He went into his usual site but no Rico; then went on to Party Poker but still no Rico. Another icon on the screen took him to a more obscure one that he knew Rico used and there he was playing Heads Up for $2500 and just about to win.

  H typed into the observer chat ‘Cerberus is looking for Rico’

  ‘You have found him’ he saw on the screen ‘You want to lose some more money?’

  ‘Try me…….’

  ‘$5000 heads up……. Next table’

  ‘Ok’

  They found a table and logged on.

  Rico V Cerberus.

  $5,000.

  One thousand chips each.

  Winner takes all.

  The cards were dealt.

  H had two Aces; Diamonds and Hearts.

  First hand and two Aces!

  Fucking magic!

  Right, let's do this properly. The odds of Rico having anything were remote. In heads up a pair is quite often a winning hand; indeed even a high card regularly wins. So how then to get maximum value?

  Rico was small blind and so a lot depended on what Rico did. The clock ticked and was down to four seconds when Rico went all in!

  It took H by surprise! You don't often sit there with two aces and the other guy goes all in!

  Christmas!

  H called the all in and the hole cards were shown.

  Rico had Kd, Kh.

  H smiled.

  Rico wasn't bluffing; just pretending he was to get a call. Well fuck Rico!

  The flop
came A, K, Q.

  H had three Aces and Rico three Kings.

  Fuck Rico!

  H marvelled at the cards. All that paint. All those fucking pictures!

  There were less in the National Gallery!

  The turn came.

  A queen…… H had done it. Aces full of Queens. Rico had Kings full of Queens so fuck you! H was typing a crude word into the chat line when the river came. He only looked at it as an aside as it made no difference.

  The river card was a King…

  He waited for the chips to come to him but they went to Rico. Confusion enveloped H. They're my fucking chips…..?

  For a moment it didn't register but then H realised his Full House had lost to four Kings. Quads!

  Fucking quads? How can it be fucking quads? H was stunned….he had won…..and then he had lost!

  The computer bonged and the chat line showed

  Rico: Thanks for the money you f****** gay loser

  The next moment the table was empty and Rico had gone. H was quite lost. He had no idea what had just happened…..? You just can't play heads up and a full house is beaten by quads! It just can't happen.

  Mathematically the odds were enormous. Just getting quads was about ten thousand to one, plus getting a full house as well, plus getting them on the same hand, plus getting them on the first hand. And not only that the bastard; the lousy thieving fucking arseholing bastard had won yet again on the river.

  Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck….

  His fist went smashing towards the monitor…….. and stopped fractionally short.

  He looked, dumbfounded at the empty table and another note popped up in the chat box

  Observer – Rico Perhaps £1 beginner's games would suit you better? Ga-y Loser!