Two Little Secrets

by Linda Wisdom

  She playfully scolded Emma for feeding Casper a piece of her chicken while Trey gloated and declared she was in trouble and he wasn’t.

  “Eat and you don’t have to worry about getting into trouble,” Zach told them both.

  “I wish we had a dog,” Emma said wistfully at Casper, who lay happily at her feet.

  “We can have a puppy, can’t we, Daddy?” Trey asked.

  “When you get older,” Zach said, as if he’d said it many times before.

  “How much older?” Trey tried to pin him down.

  “Older.”

  “Daddy talk for when he’s old enough to take care of a dog,” Ginna confided in a mock whisper.

  “But you have a dog.” Emma looked at Casper as if she wanted to run off with him. The shepherd looked up as if he was aware he was the subject of their conversation.

  “And there’re times I feel bad when I’m gone and have to leave him alone,” Ginna replied.

  Emma looked at Ginna with eyes so very like her father’s. “Then why don’t you get another dog so Casper will have a friend to play with and he wouldn’t be lonely?”

  “One dog is enough, thank you very much.” Ginna cut into her chicken. “Casper takes up enough of the bed as it is.”

  “He sure does,” Zach muttered, earning a censuring frown from Ginna.

  “But if you had two dogs, you could give them their own bed,” Trey piped up. “Or maybe you need kids to play with Casper so he wouldn’t feel lonely,” he slyly added.

  She shook her head. “If I had two dogs, they’d both want my bed. Dogs have minds of their own. Casper is spoiled. Not as much as some, but he’s definitely spoiled. He believes half the bed is his.”

  “No sh—!” Zach flinched when the pain radiated across his shin from where Ginna kicked it.

  Emma shook her finger at her dad. “Daddy! You almost said a bad word.”

  “And he’s very sorry about it,” Ginna explained, arching an eyebrow at Zach.

  He obediently hung his head in shame. The twins giggled.

  “Nana Cathy spoils Casper,” Emma announced, using the name Cathy had suggested she and Trey use with the explanation all the children called her that, while Lou was known as Papa Lou. “She makes him special dog biscuits.”

  Since that first visit, the twins had been back to the Walker home several times and now considered it their home away from home. Trey gloried in learning all about engines from Lou and Theo, while Emma enjoyed her time in the kitchen with Cathy. Zach told Ginna that he was waiting for the twins to announce they were moving out there. Especially after the family cat gave birth to kittens. Even the prospect of attending kindergarten in a few months wasn’t as exciting as going out to Nana Cathy and Papa Lou’s for a day of fun.

  Zach was amazed that the older couple had taken two more children into their hearts so easily.

  Going there, becoming part of the group, showed him what it was like in a large family. Lucie and Nick were always invited and had gone a couple times.

  After the children ate, they ran back to the plastic wading pool Ginna had set in the middle of the lawn.

  “Make sure Casper stays out of the pool!” Ginna called after them.

  “We will!” Trey yelled back, jumping in it himself and sending sprays of water everywhere.

  “Are you sure you want that out there?” Zach asked, watching the children splash each other.

  “They love it,” she replied. “And it will remain in one piece as long as Casper stays out of it. Not easy for him to do, since he loves water.” She used her feet to scoot one of the other chairs over in front of her so she could prop her feet on the seat. She picked up her glass of iced tea and sipped it. “It’s such a beautiful day.”

  “We could have gone out for dinner somewhere,” he said. “That way you wouldn’t have had to go to so much trouble.”

  Ginna shook her head. “The kids wouldn’t have had as much fun in a restaurant. Here, we can all relax.” She moved one leg and tickled his leg with her toes. “See?” She lifted her brows in a comical manner.

  “I just wish I could stay the night.”

  “Poor baby,” she cooed. She started laughing. “Look at you! Right now, you look just like Trey when you told him he didn’t need that model car he found.”

  “I miss my car when I’m not with it.” He put on a forlorn face.

  She continued running her toes up and down his bare leg, moving farther upward with each sweep of her toes.

  “What do you miss the most about your precious car?” she asked in a low voice.

  He looked upward as he considered his answer.

  “Well, the headlights are always nice, but it’s the tires I like the most.”

  “I should have known you were a tire man,” Ginna said with a heavy sigh. “I bet you like the fancy rims, too.”

  “It depends.” He cocked his head to one side, considering her. “A nice peppy engine.”

  “At least you didn’t say perky.”

  He held up a hand. “Smooth lines, nice paint job, maybe one of the European models,” he mused.

  She inched her sunglasses down her nose so she could glare at him. “European model? I don’t think so.”

  He grinned. “Not even one with a snazzy tailpipe?”

  “I’ll have Dad find you a nice clunky truck.”

  Zach feigned sorrow. “And here I thought I’d finally get the car of my dreams.”

  “Ginna! Come play with us!” Emma shouted.

  “I’ll be over there in a little while,” she called back. “Right now, I’m explaining cars to your dad.”

  “Daddy plays Matchbox cars with me,” Trey offered.

  Ginna looked at Zach with amused sympathy. “Poor baby having to settle for a substitute.”

  WHEN THE TWINS fell asleep, Ginna suggested putting them in the guest room, saying the queen-size bed was more than big enough for the two of them.

  Zach was worried about the sheets, since the kids hadn’t had their baths that evening and were dirty from their time outside. She assured him it was fine. The sheets could always be washed.

  Ginna was tucking the sheet around Emma when the little girl opened her eyes.

  “I love you, Ginna,” she whispered.

  She smiled. “I love you too, sweetie.”

  Emma held up her arms and Ginna leaned down for a hug.

  “I wish you were my mommy,” she whispered in her ear. “Casper could come to our house, too.”

  Ginna’s smile slipped a notch. “I see what you’re doing. You just want my dog,” she teased.

  Emma shook her head. “No, I want you, but I wouldn’t mind if Casper lived with us, too.” She yawned and closed her eyes. Within seconds she was fast asleep.

  Ginna checked the covers around the sleeping Trey and kissed him on the forehead. Casper looked up from his post on the end of the bed. She patted him on the head and left the room.

  With her emotions running the way they were, she stopped in the bathroom first. A cold cloth to her eyes kept the tears at bay, but she could still feel the roll and pitch inside her body. She sat down on the commode and fought to keep her composure. After a few minutes she felt better. She checked herself in the mirror, applied a light touch of lipstick and blush for color and walked out to the family room, where she found Zach watching television. He looked up and smiled at her.

  “A night for the record books. They went to sleep without any excuses to stay up,” he said.

  “It would be tempting to use them as hostages to keep you here all night.” She curled up on the couch next to him.

  Zach draped his arm around her as she laid her head on his chest, one arm curved around his waist. He turned down the volume on the television. They sat quietly, his fingers combing through her hair soothingly.

  “With Casper in there, they won’t be able to move a muscle without him alerting us. He takes his job as bodyguard very seriously.”

  “Which gets his attention off me. I�
��m very grateful to them for that. I thought I’d be bribing him with bones for a long time to come.”

  Ginna’s hand crept under the hem of his polo shirt and flattened against the warm contours of his chest.

  The urge to talk wasn’t there. Their shared silences were always comfortable. Just as they were tonight.

  If they talked, would the conversation turn more personal than usual? Ginna wondered.

  Their time together was precious to her. She saw Zach three or four times a week. Most of the time the twins were with him. She never minded, because she loved them. She didn’t want to think about using the L-word with the twins, because then she’d have to admit to herself that she was in love with Zach.

  That was something she couldn’t allow, because in the end it would hurt too much.

  She was prejudiced. Zach was the perfect father. The twins were well behaved, well adjusted and wonderful to be around.

  But no matter how Zach felt about her, she knew the time would come when he would realize he wanted more. Part of that more would involve children. Someone like him deserved a lot of children. She saw how he was with all the kids at her parents’ place. Zach was a man who deserved lots of children just like her father.

  When she stopped and thought about it, she realized he was a lot like Brian and Jeff. Loyal to his woman and his children.

  Except, in the long run, she couldn’t be his woman. She didn’t want him to ever regret not having more children because he’d chosen her.

  “Why so quiet?” Zach brushed her hair from her cheek. His fingertips lingered against her skin.

  “No reason. I’m just so comfortable.” She shifted slightly, enjoying the feel of his bare skin against her palm. She moved her face so she could inhale the musky scent of his skin. “You’re like a nice lumpy teddy bear.”

  “Lumpy?” He sounded offended. “You couldn’t come up with a better word to describe my body?”

  “I like teddy bears,” she said sleepily. “They’re warm and comfortable and make me feel safe.”

  “And here I thought I was nothing more than a sex toy to you.”

  She raised her head up enough to smile at him. “I do have to say you are a wonderful toy.”

  He found the hem of her tank top and slid his hand under the soft cotton.

  “You had to know that wearing this and no bra today would drive me crazy.” He proved his statement as his hand moved over her rib cage.

  “And here I thought you were a tire man.”

  “I am,” Zach said promptly. “And damn proud of it.”

  Ginna branded his bare chest with her smile.

  “That’s for being such a wonderful man,” she told him. Then she struck fast as lightning, blowing a raspberry against his chest. “And that’s for having the nerve to compare me to a car.”

  “Oh, really?” He sprung equally fast, tickling her in every vulnerable spot.

  “Zach!” She laughed, pulling him, then losing her balance so that they both fell off the couch. They rolled around on the carpet in a battle to see who would give up first.

  In the end Ginna cried uncle. She was laughing so hard she couldn’t breathe. Zach sat up and brought her upright.

  “See what happens when you play too hard?” he chided.

  A low woof caught their attention. Casper stood in the doorway looking at them as if to say, You’ll wake the twins!

  “Sorry, we’ll be more quiet,” Ginna told the dog.

  The dog turned and left. A moment later they heard a soft thump that told them he’d jumped back on the guest-room bed.

  Ginna smothered her giggle.

  “First time I’ve been scolded by a dog,” Zach said.

  “He takes his baby-sitting duties very seriously,” she explained. Twisting her body, she suddenly pushed him backward until he lay on the carpet. She leaned over him with her hands planted on either side of his head. “But if we’re very quiet…” she whispered.

  “Just how quiet can you be?” he whispered back.

  She leaned down, skimmed his lips with her own. “Quiet as a mouse.” She grazed his lips again until they parted. She touched the tip of her tongue to his.

  At the same time, Zach pulled her down on top of him, their legs tangling. He wrapped a hand around the back of her head and rolled them over so that he now lay over her. He lowered his head and kissed her deeply. They ran their hands over each other, reacquainting themselves with every curve, every line, every sensitive inch of skin that responded to the lightest of touches. Even a feathery touch ignited a firestorm neither expected.

  Shirts were yanked up, pants yanked down. It was swift and silent. A coupling they were desperate for. The need to connect in the most elemental way.

  When Ginna opened her mouth to cry out Zach’s name, he swallowed her cry with his mouth. When she climaxed, he followed her.

  “I don’t care what you say, you’re a succubus,” he said once he could talk. “You attack me and take my vitality. One morning I’m going to wake up and find myself a withered old man.”

  “No way I’d do that to you. I like you the way you are.” She gave a sigh as she lay back with her eyes closed. Her hair was mussed, lips swollen and rosy, skin flushed.

  “I already feel safer.” He leaned over and pulled down her shirt. “Nice headlights.”

  Ginna laughed and groaned at the same time.

  “I’m hungry. Can I have some more cake?”

  They looked up, quickly scrambling to make sure their clothing was at least partially put back to rights. Trey stood in the doorway, looking bleary-eyed.

  Zach turned to Ginna. “Real life intrudes,” he said softly with a hint of regret.

  She touched his cheek. “At least he didn’t show up five minutes ago.” She stood up. “Since it’s pretty late for cake, how about a cup of hot chocolate with baby marshmallows in it?” she asked.

  Trey’s face lit up. “Yeah!”

  “Then let’s go make some hot chocolate, and if your daddy says please, we’ll make him a cup, too,” she confided, holding out her arms. The little boy leaped up, wrapping his legs around her waist. She kissed him on the nose as she carried him to the kitchen.

  As she turned on the light, she realized just how natural it felt to bring a little boy in here and fix him a cup of hot chocolate.

  All those feelings she feared were rolling in full force.

  “Can I have hot chocolate, too?” Emma walked in, looking as heavy-eyed as her brother.

  “Of course.” Ginna smiled as she guided the children to the table.

  When Zach joined them a few minutes later, they sat around the table and drank hot chocolate.

  It should have been a happy time for Ginna.

  So why did she feel like crying?

  “SO HOW ARE THINGS going? Really?” Nora pressed as she and Ginna were seated at a restaurant the next day for lunch.

  Since both had a couple of free hours, they decided to enjoy a leisurely lunch and some shopping.

  Ginna hadn’t expected Nora to see her confusion. She should have known better.

  “I’m fine. You know how busy it’s been lately. Except for today.” She managed to chuckle. “Dad’s excited because he has a Tucker to work on. Mom’s taking yoga along with her kickboxing class. I don’t know where she finds the time to do all she does. Then Jeff and Abby…” Her voice fell off.

  Nora shook her head. “Zach, Emma, Trey.” She stated each name. “They’re obviously a team. And you did it right, Gin. You not only fell in love with the man, but with his kids, too. And they obviously love you. How great is that? Judging from the expression on your face, it’s obviously not as great as it should be,” she answered her own question. “Tell Aunt Nora.”

  Ginna toyed with her iced tea.

  “Emma told me she wishes I was her mother,” she said. Her laughter came out strangled. “She said Casper can live with them, too.” She picked up her purse and dug through the contents.

  “Here.” Nor
a handed her a handkerchief. “Why did I know this would come in handy?” she muttered. “Gin, you said yourself that he knows all about you. He’s spent time with your family and survived. That alone is a biggie. Each time I’ve seen that man he looks at you the way I look at Keanu Reeves. Except, unlike me, his is more than major lust. The man is so in love with you that it’s turned into a blinding aura. Do you know how lucky you are?”

  Ginna nodded. “But it won’t work.” She started crying. She finally took a deep breath. She carefully wiped her eyes, then blew her nose. “I’m sorry. We go out for lunch and I get a crying jag.”

  “Oh, Gin, how long have you held this in?” Nora asked, watching her sip her iced tea.

  “Probably too long.” She eyed the Chinese chicken salad she’d ordered. Considering how she had been looking forward to it, she now didn’t even want to look at it. She reached for her roll and tore it into bits. “Because Zach didn’t tell me right away about the kids, I wanted to be mad at him, but I couldn’t. After all, wasn’t it better for me to date a man who already had children? Then he wouldn’t start thinking I was a bad deal since I couldn’t have them. Right?”

  “You were never a bad deal,” Nora said forcefully. “Denny was the bad deal. You’ve gone past that. You lucked out finding the absolutely most perfect guy in the world. I wouldn’t be surprised if he asks you to marry him. When that happens, you will not think of any idiotic arguments as to why you can’t marry him. Do you hear me? You will smile, tell him what a surprise and say yes, because deep down that’s what you want.”

  Ginna stared at her friend. “Where did this aggressive side to you come from? You used to be such a calm levelheaded person.”

  “That was before my best friend decided to do something stupid. And you are, aren’t you? You’re going to do something stupid.” Nora took the second roll out of Ginna’s hands before she could demolish it, too. She split it open and buttered it. “Eat your salad,” she ordered.