A Flawed Heart
Page 8
“God damn, Claire.”
He swoops in over me, places his inked forearms at either side of my head, and kisses me in ways I’ve never been kissed before. I buck my hips up against him—soft lace against hard denim—then reach down and pull at his belt and the fly of his jeans. He stands and finishes the job. I take in his body and the sinewy muscles that contract and flex in anticipation of touching me. He moves to the end of the bed, his gaze never leaving mine. He grabs the insteps of each of my feet pulls my body down the bed. He lifts one of my feet to his mouth, and kisses and licks the sensitive skin. He slides his lips over my ankle bone, the inside of my calf, my knee, my thigh…and places a kiss right over my center, then bites at the thin fabric, just under my belly button. I can’t look away from his passionate stare. He pulls his head back, taking my panties in his teeth, and moves back down my legs. I lift my hips and he slides the fabric over my ass and his body retreats slowly, dragging my panties off of my legs. He stands at the edge of the bed, and releases them from his mouth. Then he picks up my other foot, following the same path, pushing me to the edge of sanity with his slow, wet kisses.
“Please touch me,” I beg.
He bites my thigh in response. The sharp pinch is impossibly pleasurable. I grip his head and entwine my fingers in his hair. He looks up at me and his gaze makes my spine tingle.
“I’m going to make you feel so good…” His tongue slips out of his mouth and he slides it up and down my slit. My whole body tenses as it finally receives the touch it’s been craving. He grasps my hips. “Just relax.”
He spreads my lips with the fingers of one hand, while pushing the first two of the other inside me, and then wraps his lips around my clit and sucks it, flicking it lightly with his tongue. He swirls his fingers inside me and sucks harder, then gently bites. The rough contact pushes me over the edge and I let out a resounding moan.
“Do you know how good you taste?” He slides up my body and runs his fingertip over my mouth, then traces his tongue over the same path, licking my wetness off of my lips. I can feel the massive head of his cock, pressing right at my entrance. Jason’s eyes roll back in his head at the sensation, and he inhales sharply.
“I can’t wait to be inside you. Are you ready for me?” He doesn’t wait for an answer, but the answer is yes.
He reaches his hand into his nightstand and takes out a condom. He leans back on his knees and slides the latex over himself, then places his lips on mine as he moans against my mouth and shifts his weight, pushing himself inside me in one motion. I throw my head back and whimper at the sensation. It’s painfully pleasurable. I ache as my body attempts to accommodate Jason’s massive cock.
“Fuck, you feel so good!” He buries his face in my neck and kisses my shoulder, then reaches back to grab my thigh and bend my leg. He pulls out and thrusts again. With my leg in his grip, the angle is deeper, and I feel my eyes water at how all consuming he feels. He pumps into me, coming back to place his mouth on mine, then slows his pace and looks into my eyes.
“Claire, you’re the only one…”
As I kiss him I feel myself getting ready to climax. I can’t breathe. I want to scream. I feel the pressure building, and I say his name as he slips his hand under me, to the small of my back. He rocks my body up until I’m straddling him, and takes my nipple into his mouth. I slide myself up and down on his length, enjoying the control this position brings.
“Ah, shit. Fuck. Come for me, Claire.”
He bites down on my nipple and I feel myself explode. I dig my fingernails into his scalp and fist my hands into his hair. He throws me back down and pushes my knees up near my shoulders. He pumps into me, over and over, until I hear him groan my name as he reaches his own release.
Then he slumps over next to me and pulls me into his side. We lie there—silent, panting, and covered in sweat.
“Was that good?” he asks after a few minutes.
“Are you kidding me? That was…I can’t even…”
He laughs and kisses my cheek. I’m overcome with exhaustion and I let my eyes close as I bury my nose in Jason’s skin.
Chapter Six
I open my eyes to find myself in an unfamiliar place. I feel disoriented, and pull the sheet back to take in my surroundings. My eyes are fuzzy with sleep. A blurry object becomes a guitar, and I realize I’m not in my apartment. A muscular arm is draped across my belly, and the man it’s attached to is breathing evenly into my hair. I hear the sound of a door opening and footsteps.
“Jason? Jay, are you awake? It’s so nice out. Are you awake?” The person behind the door begins to knock.
It’s Lydia, and I’m in her brother’s bed.
“Mmmm…what the fuck? Lydia? Go away.”
Jason slides his hand away from my middle. I’m afraid to roll over and look at him. I feel shy and awkward in spite of the fact that we slept together last night. He sighs and runs his hand up my arm, giving me goose bumps in the sweltering room. I tilt my head over my shoulder, and look back at the man who is currently spooning me and dragging himself out from slumber.
“Did you sleep okay, baby? Why the fuck is it so hot in here?” His voice is deep and raspy.
Lydia bangs on the door again. “I’m coming in.”
I yank the sheet around me, and Jason chuckles at my reaction. Lydia bursts in, looks at us in bed together, and then stops—frozen to the ground like a tiny, stone angel.
“Oh, shit."” She puts her hand up to her mouth to cover her shocked expression. “I was wondering where you two disappeared to. I should’ve known I’d find the little songbirds here.”
“Can I fucking help you? What the hell time is it?” Jason clears his throat and squints at the alarm clock.
She crosses the room, pushes back the curtain, and throws the window open. I squint my eyes, averse to the bright light, and pull the covers over my face. Jason ducks underneath with me, shielding his own eyes from the harsh daylight. That’s when I realize I’m completely naked—and so is he.
I hold my forearm across my breasts, even though modesty at this point is a little silly. Jason has one eye half open, the other squeezed shut. He’s disheveled appearance makes me flash back on all the things he did to my body last night, and my face gets hot in the already steamy room. He adjusts to the light and his gaze moves down my body. He licks his lips as he takes in my nakedness in the light. There is no place for me to hide. I avert my eyes, embarrassed about how vulnerable I am—in his bed, with his sister on the other side of the sheet. As I look at him, I admire the art that covers his bare body. Each piece tells a story—and it makes me want to learn more about him. When I look lower, I’m treated to the sight of Jason’s enormous morning wood. I gasp out loud at the sight of it, and Jason gives me a grin, brushing the hair from my face as I giggle.
“Ah-hem. Can I interrupt you two for one minute? Jesus.”
Jason pulls the sheet back, and together we peek out at Lydia.
“The reason I’m here, waking you up at ten o’clock, is because its eighty degrees and sunny right now. The high today is going to be ninety-fucking-two.” Lydia is beaming.
I’m lost as to why this is a big deal, and, judging by Jason’s confused expression, so is he.
“It’s Indian summer! We’re going to the quarry in Westchester today to have a picnic and go swimming. Don’t try to argue with me. There are precious few nice days left before the ungodly New York winter, and I will not allow them to be wasted.”
“Lydia—”
“I said no arguing, brother.” Her hands are on her hips and she’s tapping her foot. When she wants to have fun, she takes no prisoners.
“Claire, my dear, get up and get dressed. You and I are going home so we can clean up and get our stuff. I stayed at Kat’s place last night. The three of us can pick up food for the picnic on the way. Jason, we’ll meet you and Ben at the quarry.”
She walks out the door. “…and gross boner, Jason. Put some fucking pants on,” she shouts
back over her shoulder.
The sheet that was covering us has drifted down to Jason’s hip, and the deep V of his muscular abdomen is visible. I fight the urge to trace my finger along it. His hands are laced behind his head, and his hard-on juts out from under the sheet. He seems so comfortable, so at ease, and I’m balled up in his sheets, freaking out. The curtain billows in the warm breeze, and it cools Jason’s room. Lydia is right. It’s a beautiful day.
“I guess I should get going.” I sit up, keeping myself covered, and look around the bedroom floor for my clothes.
Jason takes a deep breath and blows it out. A soft smile plays on his lips. “Do you have any idea how beautiful you look right now? Wrapped in my sheet…in my bed? So beautiful.” He grabs my elbow and pulls me down into his embrace. I press my cheek to his chest and he kisses the top of my head. “I’m really happy about last night. I want you to know that. I feel…it was just…” He struggles with what to say, and my heart warms.
“I’m happy, too.”
“I’d like to see you again tonight after work, if you’re free,” he whispers into my hair.
“I have to work from three to eight, so maybe after that?”
“Yeah, okay. Do you want to meet me at my rehearsal space?”
“Okay.” I feel my face heat and I try to curb the grin that’s fighting its way across my lips.
He slips out from underneath the sheet and my eyes nearly pop out of my head as Jason’s perfect, naked body gathers my panties and clothes from the floor. He tosses them to me but holds my bra in his hand, running the lace between his fingers.
“Do you have more underwear like this?” His expression is devious and hopeful.
“Yes. I have a lot more underwear like that.”
His mouth falls open as I slip my panties on under the sheet. He places my bra on the bed and eyes me as I reach for it, exposing my breasts to him. He brings the fingers of his right hand up to his lips and runs them along his jaw as he watches me put my bra on. I push the sheet back and stand, more comfortable now that I’m covered up a bit.
“Since it seems like we’re going to be having lunch at the quarry today, what would you like me to get for you at the market?” I pull my jeans up and slide my shirt over my head, thankful that Lydia is driving, and I won’t have to walk in the heat in this outfit.
Still completely naked, he walks over to me. His gaze roams my body as he speaks. “You can get me a roast beef sandwich, with pepper jack cheese—lettuce, tomato, mayo—some bar-b-que chips, and a coke. Can you remember all that?” He puts his hands at my waist, his cock pressing against my stomach.
He towers over me and his shoulder is at my lips. I look up at him and his sleepy eyes burn into mine. I swallow hard and my breath quickens. I sigh, and press my lips to his shoulder, tasting his sweat from last night. He tilts my chin up with his long fingers, and I’m smothered by the intensity of his stare. He furrows his brow and kisses me with passion.
“Claire! Come on. Let’s go!” Lydia shouts at us again from the kitchen. “You guys are going to see each other in like an hour, you know that, right? Give Claire your keys please, Jason. I’m borrowing your car. Get a ride with Ben.”
I push against his broad chest with my fingertips to break the kiss. He turns to his nightstand and retrieves his car keys. He dangles them in front of me, his mouth turned up in a smile.
“I’ll see you later.” I grab the keys and my bag, and leave his room without looking back.
Lydia and I walk out into the gorgeous, late summer day. Jason’s car chirps as she unlocks it and we get in. I blush as the events of last night play through my mind. Lydia rolls down the windows and fiddles with Jason’s iPod.
After stopping at our apartment to change, we pick up Kat and head out of town. Kat has chosen to take over the backseat and falls asleep as soon as we hit the road.
“We got in late last night,” Lydia explains. “So, listen. I know I was unfair to you when I asked you to stay away from Jason, but I’m afraid that if things don’t go well, you’ll move out and you won’t want to be my friend anymore. It was selfish of me to make you promise not to see him, but I do think you should be…careful. I don’t want anyone to get hurt.”
“I get it. I didn’t mean for this to happen, but I…I like him. I don’t think there’s a way for me to not try this. He’s amazing.” I shake my head as I try to make this make sense to Lydia.
“I know you’re attracted to him, Claire. That’s obvious. But I think you know he has a lot of shit in his heart. He has this darkness to him.”
“You know that I’ve been through pain, too. I don’t know everything about Jason, but maybe I can help him. If he lets me in.”
“I hope so. I really hope so.”
I’m not sure if she’s warning me for my benefit, or Jason’s, or hers, but I have respect for the fact that she loves her brother so much.
We trade the roads of the city for the winding Hutchinson River Parkway. Being in the country reminds me of home, and melancholy overcomes me.
We enter Westchester County, and just off our exit is a little market where we stop. We place our orders at the deli counter, and Lydia knows what Jason wants without me having to tell her. She places all the groceries in a little cooler picnic basket thing, and we get back in the car. I sit back and stare out the window. The road to the quarry is lined with trees, and the leaves of some are beginning to yellow as fall approaches. The colors blur together as Lydia pushes the speed limit. I breathe in the sweet smell of the countryside, and run my hands through my hair, thinking of Jason’s hands on my body, his mouth against mine, his hips pushing into me, his skin inside of me…
Lydia takes a swift left and we leave the paved road for a dirt one. She slows her speed and we wind through the woods, emerging into a clearing. I see the huge, tree lined, black walls of the rock quarry reflected in the still and dark water. Alana’s car is already there. We park next to it and get out, but I don’t see her or Ben or Jason. I help Lydia and Kat with the cooler and the blanket, and we walk down a steep path to small, shaded clearing. Lydia spreads out the blanket. We sit down, and I light a cigarette.
“It’s so beautiful here.”
“Yeah, we found this place last summer. The water’s really cold, but it’s so peaceful, so quiet.”
I hear a high-pitched squeal and a booming laugh. I jump, startled by the sound.
“I guess it’s not always quiet. Relax, Claire. They’re cliff jumping. Look.” She points to the far right side of the quarry and I see three figures. I can make out Alana floundering in the water. Ben’s enormous figure stands at the edge of the cliff, shirtless and shaking with laughter. Jason sits just behind Ben, his legs bent in front of him, elbows resting on his knees. The anticipation of being near him ripples up my spine even though we were together just this morning.
“Jeez. Is that dangerous? It looks high up.”
“It’s about thirty feet. You have to be careful how you land. It’s scary as shit, I’m not gonna lie to you, but it’s a rush. The quarry is super deep, so there’s no chance of you hitting bottom, and its mineral water, so there’s no fish. You want to do it?”
“I don’t know.”
“You can do it from a lower height if you want. You see right there? That’s about fifteen feet. It’s not as scary. Come on.”
She grabs my hand, pulls me up, and then walks beside Kat. I hear a splash and see that Ben has joined Alana in the water. Jason hasn’t moved. He raises his hand and waves. I lift up my hand and wave back. Even across this body of water, I feel pulled to him. Our connection has only intensified now that I’ve been with him.
We wind up a foot beaten path, and I’ve started to sweat in the heat. The sun is blaring down from the highest point in the sky, and I’ll be thankful once I’m in the cool water. I hear Ben’s voice getting louder as we get closer.
“I did not push you! It’s not my fault you’re a klutz.”
“You’re a jerk! I h
ate you, Ben. Seriously, I do,” Alana says.
“Sure you do, babe.”
We round a bend in the path and come face to face with our friends. I look to Jason immediately. I see the feelings in my heart on his face—relief, happiness, excitement, and anxiety. He stands and walks toward me. His trim, fit body causes my mouth to water. He’s wearing navy board shorts and no shirt, and his smile widens as he approaches. He puts his hand at small of my back and looks down at me with a tempest in his eyes.
“Hi.” He takes my breath away as he places a soft kiss on my lips, and I press myself into him, forgetting where we are.
“Hey, Claire—you jumpin’ or what?” Ben asks.
“Y’all are crazy, but I’ll jump. I don’t know about from this high, though.”
“It’s really not as bad as it looks.” Alana wipes her face with a towel and wrings out her hair. “You’re in the water before you know it.”
Jason looks to me, trying to read my face. “Don’t feel pressured. I’ll jump with you if you want.” He squeezes my hand and winks at me.
There’s no way I can resist this man. “Okay.”
“All right, let’s do this. I’m hungry.” Ben pulls Alana to the edge of the rocks with him. She tries to fight him off, but fails, and they jump into the water together.