by Beth Wiseman
Rebecca gasped as she threw her hand over her mouth.
“Of course, we’ll take you anywhere you need to go.” Noah worked quickly to untether the horse, and Rebecca climbed in the back seat so Gavin could ride up front.
“Maybe I care more about that girl than I thought, because I feel like someone’s punched me in the gut.” Gavin spoke in a shaky voice as Noah clicked the reins and headed in the direction of the clinic. Rebecca knew the place well and had been there plenty of times herself for minor things. The owner used to be Amish and had opened the clinic to accommodate the Amish, but lots of Englisch folks went there too.
Fifteen minutes later, Noah pulled into the parking lot. He pulled up to an available hitching post, and Gavin hurried out of the buggy and ran toward the building.
“This is terrible,” Rebecca said as Noah tethered the horse, then filled a pan with water he kept in the buggy. Noah had pushed the animal hard to make good time. “I hope Gavin’s friend is okay.”
“Me too.” They walked hand in hand to the clinic. Whatever Noah’s idea had been to fix things, it no longer seemed important. Rebecca thought about the pettiness of her choices recently, when inside the clinic a young woman was fighting for her life. She wondered if the overdose was accidental or intentional. She’d never met Penny, but she silently fell into prayer for the woman.
Her prayers were cut short when they entered the waiting room. It was empty except for two people sitting next to each other. Her brother and McKenna. Gavin must have gone to see Penny.
Rebecca waited for McKenna to sprout horns or show her fangs, but instead she just smiled, reminding Rebecca of how nice she’d been when she visited their house. Rebecca glanced at Noah. Her fiancé was as white as the walls.
Everyone exchanged pleasantries, although they seemed a bit strained, especially for Noah, who looked everywhere except at McKenna. Rebecca wasn’t sure how everything panned out, but it eased her guilt that Paul and McKenna had somehow found each other. Still, she didn’t know if she could get past the intimacy McKenna had shared with Noah. It was a selfish thought to have when a young woman was in such a desperate situation.
Rebecca’s eyes drifted to McKenna, and she saw the sorrow on her face, similar to the expression she’d had the day she visited looking for Paul. Rebecca then noticed the way her brother was looking at McKenna, the way he pushed back her hair and whispered something in her ear.
Before she had time to ponder what Paul might have said, the door leading to the examining rooms opened, and Gavin burst out. It didn’t look like he’d been crying. He was crying.
CHAPTER 14
Noah stood tall, but he was trembling on the inside. Rebecca was staring at McKenna a lot, and Noah wondered if his fiancée was going to blow up. It wasn’t their way, but it had been known to happen.
Penny was released an hour after they all arrived.
“I can’t believe you thought I overdosed.” Penny rolled her eyes as she reached for Gavin’s hand. “Apparently I’m allergic to Benadryl.”
Even though Penny was trying to play off the incident, her bottom lip was trembling. She had smudged makeup under her eyes, and her long blond hair wasn’t the smooth and shiny mane it usually was. Noah wondered if she was telling the truth about an allergic reaction.
Loud voices sounded from behind the closed door that led from the exam rooms to the waiting room, and a few moments later, a man and woman pushed through the doors.
“Let’s go, Penny.” The lady, presumably Penny’s mother, grabbed her daughter by the arm, but Penny jerked away and kept her hand in Gavin’s.
“No.” Penny’s eyes filled with tears. “I’m not going with you.”
Penny’s father, a well-dressed Englisch man with graying hair, walked past them without a word and left the building.
“Uh, yes, young lady, you are coming with us.” Penny’s mom waved toward the exit door. “Your father is livid and embarrassed. Why would you do something like this?”
Noah kept his eyes down, his heart hurting for Penny, a girl he barely knew. He couldn’t imagine his parents speaking to him like that in front of his friends, or even privately for that matter.
Penny leaned closer to Gavin, and he wrapped his arm around her.
Penny’s mother threw her arms in the air. “Unbelievable. What in the world would make you take a bunch of pills like that? I’m sure having your stomach pumped wasn’t a pleasant experience, but at least you survived.”
Noah glanced around the room. Penny’s head was buried in the nook of Gavin’s arm, and she started to cry. Rebecca’s eyes filled with tears, and so did McKenna’s. Paul had his arm around McKenna.
“I’m leaving, Penny. Are you coming or not?” Penny’s mother waited, and Penny eventually shook her head. “Fine.” The woman stormed out of the building, and within seconds the yelling started again, fading after a few moments.
Penny lifted her head from Gavin’s chest but wouldn’t make eye contact with any of them. “I’m sorry.” Tears poured down her cheeks. “I wasn’t trying to kill myself. I promise. I just wanted the pain to stop.”
Rebecca dabbed at her eyes. McKenna eased away from Paul and walked over to Penny, gently coaxing her friend away from Gavin a little. She pushed hair away from Penny’s face and kissed her on the cheek before she pulled her into a hug.
“I love you, and everything is going to be okay.” McKenna’s nurturing, sweet voice seemed to calm Penny, and she fell into her arms.
Gavin, Noah, and Paul stood quietly nearby, but none of them said anything. Rebecca wasn’t sure what to say or do either. It felt intrusive to even be here. She didn’t know Penny, and she’d held on to awful thoughts about McKenna for much too long. It was obvious, though, that McKenna was just an affectionate person. Rebecca recalled their conversation in the kitchen and how much even she liked McKenna. If Rebecca was honest with herself, she could see Noah’s initial attraction to her. Kindness radiated from her.
Rebecca could feel the bitterness draining from her mind.
“I can’t go back there, McKenna.” Penny lowered her head to her friend’s shoulder. “I can’t be around all of the fighting. It’s nonstop.” She sobbed. “My parents are so messed up.” She grunted, then looked into McKenna’s eyes. “I assure you . . .” She glanced around at all of them. “Money does not buy happiness. I . . .” She took a deep breath. “I want peace. I want a different life. I don’t want this one anymore. I’m tired of feeling this way. I want—No. I need God’s love in my life.”
Rebecca was sure she wasn’t the only one with tears in her eyes at the admission.
Penny began to cry again, then whispered to McKenna, “We don’t have anywhere to go. My parents are probably canceling my credit cards on their drive home.”
“We will figure it out.” McKenna tucked Penny’s tangled masses of hair behind her ears. “I have enough money for a cheap hotel for tonight, and you need to rest.”
As Penny and McKenna continued to talk quietly, Rebecca let go of Noah’s hand and walked over to where Paul was standing, then leaned up and whispered in his ear. After he nodded, she went to McKenna and Penny.
“We have a place where you can both stay as long as you want to.” Rebecca lifted her chin, fighting tears of her own.
Penny sniffled. “You don’t even know us.”
McKenna touched Rebecca’s arm and smiled slightly. “I know her, Penny. She’s Paul’s sister, Becky, and she’s gracious and kind.” She turned around and her smile grew as she locked eyes with Paul. “And so is her brother.”
Rebecca lowered her gaze as shame took hold of her. She fought to shrug it off, but it would take time for her to forgive herself for the horrible thoughts she’d had about McKenna.
When she looked up again, she saw the way Paul gazed at McKenna. Perhaps they were all smitten with her in their own ways, but Rebecca had never seen Paul look at a woman the way he was gazing into McKenna’s eyes.
“The daadi haus on our
property is empty. Paul and I are sure our parents won’t mind if you both stay there awhile.” Rebecca put a hand on Penny’s arm. Her people weren’t affectionate by nature, especially in front of others, but Rebecca felt the tension leaving Penny from that simple gesture. “So please be our guests for as long as you’d like.”
Penny wrapped her arms around Rebecca’s neck and cried. “Thank you,” she whispered. “I’ll find a way to pay you. I just can’t go back to my house.”
“There are no worries,” Rebecca said. “You need rest.”
McKenna looked at Paul. “I have my car, so I can take the three of us girls. Paul made arrangements to have an Amish friend at the library take his horse and buggy home.” She looked at Noah. “Can you take Gavin and Paul in your buggy?”
Noah nodded, the color having returned to his face. Whatever his idea had been to fix things between them, God had had other plans. They were all exactly where they needed to be at this moment.
Rebecca reached for Penny’s hand, then McKenna’s. She squeezed both, then guided these two lost souls out of the building, feeling a purpose arising in her that snuffed out the bad feelings she’d had, along with the shame.
After they were in the car, McKenna assured Penny and Rebecca she could drive. On the way to Rebecca’s house, McKenna talked about her mother and the situation she’d been living with for years. Penny shared about life at her house too. Rebecca shuddered at some of the stories, but she’d never felt more blessed in her life, and she prayed for these women to find the peace they both so desperately needed. Rebecca had heard Penny’s plea loud and clear. “I need God’s love in my life.”
Rebecca wanted that for both of them.
Noah’s heart was heavy as he flicked the reins and pushed the horse to go a little faster. Dark clouds were forming, and he hoped to get Gavin back to the hardware store, and Paul and himself home before it started to rain. He was glad the girls were in McKenna’s car.
Gavin planned to finish his shift at the store and had arranged for his father to pick him up later, but Noah’s friend hadn’t said much, so Noah spoke up.
“Did you know things were that bad at Penny’s house?” He recalled the lavish party he’d attended and the temptations that abounded everywhere. The fancy house with technologies Noah hadn’t seen before, the drinking, and the evidence of wealth.
Sitting next to him on the front seat of the buggy, Gavin shook his head. “I mean, I knew Penny had issues, but I’m as shocked as everyone else that she took it this far. I realized early on that she partied a lot—more than I’m comfortable with—but it was obviously an escape for her. Still, I like her a lot. The few times she’s shown the real Penny, I’ve liked that person even better than the one who is always trying to be cool. But it tore me up to see her like that today, especially when she broke down the way she did.” He looked over his shoulder at Paul. “Do you really think it’s going to be okay with your parents that Penny and McKenna stay there?”
Noah had wondered the same thing.
“Ya, it will be okay when Becky and I explain the situation to them.”
Thinking about the temporary living arrangements, Noah recalled his plan to fix things between himself and Rebecca. In light of the seriousness of the past few hours, it now sounded silly, but he’d thought if Rebecca hugged and kissed Gavin on the cheek, then they’d be even and she could put it behind her. But something had happened tonight, and he was still trying to wrap his mind around it. He knew Rebecca well, but he’d seen a side of her he hadn’t seen before tonight, a compassion that touched his heart. In spite of her feelings about McKenna, Rebecca had been the one to reach out to her and Penny and offer a solution. The gesture made him love her all the more.
After a few more moments of silence, Noah glanced at Paul. “So you and McKenna looked pretty cozy.”
Paul cleared his throat. “Ya, I like McKenna a lot.”
“But she’s Englisch,” Noah said.
Quiet again.
Then Paul sighed. “Ya, she is.”
I guess Rebecca was right about Paul not planning to join the church.
When Noah stopped in front of the hardware store, his friend thanked him for the ride and for being there.
“It was nothing,” Noah assured him. He paused. “Rebecca and I are going to be baptized Sunday during worship service. I heard what Penny said about needing the love of God.”
“Yeah, I was surprised about that,” Gavin said, scratching his chin before he opened the door of the buggy. He turned to Noah and smiled. “Surprised in a good way.”
Noah nodded. He’d always suspected Gavin was in a good place with the Lord. “Baptism is a blessed and holy event for us. I think it will be impossible not to feel the love of God during the ceremony. I don’t think the bishop would mind if you and Penny attended. I can explain to him that I work with you, and you and Penny are friends.”
Gavin stepped out of the buggy, closed the door, then leaned in the window. “I think that would be great. I’ll talk to Penny.”
Even after Noah dropped off Paul, he couldn’t stop thinking about the events of the day. Rebecca had been so upset about McKenna, and then she’d transformed in front of his eyes. Penny wasn’t the rich girl who had everything, the way Noah had assumed. McKenna and Paul were clearly smitten with each other, but that was a complicated situation. In the end, six friends and acquaintances—Englisch and Amish—had bonded together for the good of all.
Noah cringed as he thought about how close he’d come to being sucked into a world that he now knew he wasn’t a part of. He prayed Rebecca would become his wife, but one thing he was sure of was that he was going to be baptized on Sunday.
He felt a new closeness with God. Something deeper. For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them. Paul, McKenna, Penny, Rebecca, Gavin, and Noah—each person in that waiting room had been there for a reason, and the grace of God shone down on all of them.
CHAPTER 15
Sunday morning arrived with crisp fall weather, and as the clouds parted, sunshine found its way between the cracks in the barn where the worship service was being held. Rebecca could feel God’s presence, and it was everything she could do not to cry when the bishop’s wife blessed her with a holy kiss on the cheek. She glanced at Noah just as the bishop blessed him with a holy kiss.
Rebecca and Noah hadn’t talked about wedding plans, and she was happy about that. She wanted to know that she and Noah were both being baptized for the right reasons, and not just because they wanted to get married. Everything was in order for a wedding, but on hold. Penny’s and McKenna’s situations had taken priority. Both girls wore dark circles under their eyes today, and Rebecca suspected they stayed up late talking.
As was normal, the women were on one side of the room and the men on the other. The bishop and deacons were in the middle, along with Noah, Rebecca, and the bishop’s wife.
Rebecca glanced at Penny and McKenna as the bishop said his final prayer. McKenna’s expression was sober, as if she was in deep thought. Penny wept openly. Rebecca had been witness to a lot of baptisms over the years, and each time the Holy Spirit had been present. She could recall that even as a child she’d been overwhelmed with God’s love during a baptism. The first attendance to such an event, as it was for Penny, was always special. Almost as special as this day was for Rebecca. She prayed again for peace for McKenna and Penny. Then, seeing Paul across the room, his gaze fixed on McKenna, Rebecca prayed for her brother and McKenna too.
Gavin was standing next to Paul and had the same serious expression McKenna did. His eyes never left Penny.
But despite Rebecca’s baptism and the love she felt swelling in her heart, there was still something she had to take care of. She waited until after the meal was served before she found McKenna and asked to talk to her privately. McKenna followed her out of the barn until they were a few feet into the front yard of the Petersheims’ house.
“Thank you
and your family again for letting me and Penny stay in your extra house.” She touched Rebecca’s arm. “I will get a full-time job and pay back any rent, or whatever arrangement your parents are willing to work out until we get on our feet.”
Rebecca tried to smile but failed and instead blinked back tears. “I’ve held ill will against you, and I want to say I’m sorry.”
McKenna pulled her jacket snug, glanced at the ground, then back at Rebecca. “I know this is about the hug and kiss, but I promise you, nothing happened, and it never would have.”
Rebecca nodded. “I know that now, but at the time, I let jealousy latch onto me, and I laid misplaced blame on you. I want you to know I’m sorry.” She lowered her eyes. “And I’m ashamed.”
McKenna touched Rebecca’s arm and spoke softly. “Please don’t apologize. Any ill will you felt toward me was understandable. But don’t let shame bring you down. It can be like a weight around your neck. I’ve always been ashamed of my mother’s behavior, even though I love her very much. I struggle with shame, too, and it’s a horrible emotion brought forth by the enemy.”
“I guess . . . I guess I just need you to forgive me.”
McKenna smiled. “There’s nothing to forgive, Becky.”
Rebecca huffed, grinning. “There is one other thing.”
McKenna’s eyebrows drew in as she brought a hand to her chest. “What is it?”
“Can you please call me Rebecca? I’m not sure if Paul calls me Becky just to irritate me because that’s what big brothers do, or if he really can’t shrug the habit because he’s called me Becky since we were kids.”
