The Hope Jar

by Wanda E. Brunstetter

  Lititz, Pennsylvania

  “Here we are.” Brad pulled his van into a nearly full parking lot and turned off the engine. “Wish we could have come earlier today, to take in the parade and some of the other afternoon festivities. But at least we’ll be able to see the fireworks display and get involved in some of the other fun activities.”

  Michelle smiled, feeling a bit self-conscious all of a sudden. She and Brad weren’t here as a couple, and she didn’t expect him to hang around with her all evening, but how could she bring up the subject without embarrassing Brad or making him feel obligated to spend the evening with her?

  “Looks like there’s quite a few people here,” Brad commented after they’d left the van and made their way toward the festivities.

  “You’re right. We’ll probably get lost in the crowd.”

  “I hope not, but let’s plan to meet back here at the van by ten o’clock in case we do.”

  “Okay.” Michelle assumed from Brad’s comment that he planned to go off on his own. That made it easy, because now she wouldn’t have to bring up the subject.

  They had no more than entered the park when she caught sight of Ezekiel and Lenore walking side by side. They were some distance away and didn’t appear to see them. Michelle wondered if they had come here together. Maybe the two of them had begun courting and were on a date.

  As they walked farther away, the sound of familiar music caught Michelle’s attention.

  “Oh look, there’s a carousel over there.” She pointed in that direction.

  Brad smiled. “Sure enough. It looks small compared to the ones I rode on as a child at the carnivals in Harrisburg every summer.” He chuckled. “At least I thought they were big back then.”

  Michelle nodded as a memory from the past came to mind. On one of the rare occasions when her dad was sober and things were halfway normal at home, her folks had taken Michelle and her brothers to a state fair. Dad had bought tickets so she, Ernie, and Jack could ride the merry-go-round. Michelle chose a horse that had been painted all white, except for a black tail. She’d sat up there so happy, feeling like she was on top of the world. When they’d gone home later that day, Dad had started drinking. He and Mom ended up in a huge fight, and before long, the police showed up at their door.

  Her throat constricted. Why couldn’t I have grown up in a normal household, with good parents who got along with each other and didn’t abuse their kids?

  “Hey, are you okay?” Brad placed his hand on her shoulder. “You look upset.”

  The comforting act caused the dam to break, and despite her resolve, tears coursed down Michelle’s cheeks.

  “What’s wrong?”

  She sniffed deeply and reached into her skirt pocket for a tissue. “Seeing the carousel reminded me of something from my childhood. Guess I’m just too sentimental.” Michelle wasn’t about to tell Brad the whole story. If he should repeat it to Willis and Mary Ruth, they’d think their daughter, whom Michelle had never even met, was a terrible mother.

  Brad put his hand on Michelle’s back and gave her a gentle pat. “Nothing wrong with being sentimental. We all get nostalgic at times.”

  “Yeah, I guess.”

  “Would you like to get something to eat or drink before the fireworks start?” he asked.

  “Well, umm … I didn’t bring any money with me.”

  “No problem. It’s my treat.”

  “Thanks. I am kinda hungry.” Michelle felt herself relax.

  He grinned. “All right then, let’s see what we can find.”

  As they headed toward the food booths, Michelle noticed Ezekiel again. This time he was looking in her direction. She waved, and he nodded in response. Lenore had her back to Michelle and seemed to be looking at something in one of the booths. Maybe she would have the chance to say hello to both of them later.

  Ezekiel stood in line at the cotton candy booth. After Lenore went off to join some of her friends, he’d decided to get something to eat. Not that cotton candy was the best choice, since it was full of sugar, but it reminded him of when he was boy. Back then Ezekiel’s life had been carefree, and he hadn’t thought much about whether he would join the Amish church someday or become part of the English world. Now the prospect of leaving his Amish heritage consumed his thoughts. He didn’t want to disappoint his parents, but he ought to have the right to make his own decisions about the rest of his life.

  Ezekiel paid for his treat and moved on toward the area where the fireworks would be displayed. He’d seen Sara walking in the same direction with that English fellow, Brad. Before that, he had also witnessed Brad with his hand against Sara’s back.

  I bet they came here together. He probably asked her on a date. Ezekiel licked some sticky cotton candy from his lips and kept walking. When he’d mentioned the festival to Sara she had said she wasn’t sure if she’d be coming or not. He’d hoped she might come here with him. Guess it’s my fault. I should’ve followed up with her.

  Ezekiel didn’t understand why he felt envious. He barely knew Sara and certainly had no claim on her. Maybe I’ll have the opportunity to get to know her better when I start teaching her how to drive a horse and buggy. In addition to giving Sara her first lesson tomorrow, it would give him the chance to find out if something was going on with her and Brad.

  Chapter 18

  Newark

  When Sara returned home from her class on Thursday, she was pleased to discover a letter in her mailbox postmarked, “Strasburg, Pennsylvania.” It had to be from her grandparents. I am so glad they finally responded.

  Almost breathless, she hurried into the house, tossed the rest of the mail on the kitchen table, and pulled out a chair. Her fingers trembled a bit as she tore open the letter:

  Dear Sara,

  We were pleased to receive your letters and look forward to meeting you. But since summer is a very busy time for us, we would prefer you wait until sometime in October to come here for a visit.

  Most sincerely,

  Willis and Mary Ruth Lapp

  In one sense, Sara felt relieved that her grandparents wouldn’t be available to visit with her until October. It would give her plenty of time to finish her summer class and prepare for meeting them. In another sense, she was disappointed that she couldn’t meet them sooner. At least between now and then they could communicate via letters. The next time Sara wrote to her grandparents, she would ask for their phone number. If they had one, it was obviously unlisted since she’d had no luck finding it via the internet.

  Sara’s forehead wrinkled as she reread the letter. As the words sank in, she became somewhat baffled. Was I wrong in hoping they’d be a little more excited about finding out they had a granddaughter? She sighed, glancing at the return address on the envelope. But again, what did I expect to happen?

  Her lips formed a grim line as she continued to discuss the issue with herself, only this time out loud. “It would have been nice to put me ahead of their busy summer. After all, they just learned their daughter died, and I’m their daughter’s offspring.”

  The more Sara went over this, the more she became unsure about her grandparents. The fact was, they’d taken their time getting back to her. That spoke volumes.

  Sara continued to study the letter. Her grandparents sounded polite enough, but the more she read over the letter and got to the part about their busy summer, the more disappointed she became. This wasn’t anything like she’d expected. Sara had daydreamed about her new grandparents’ response and expected they would show more emotion than this. She had conjured up a wonderful emotional reunion once they finally met. It would be the type of reunion she’d watched on certain TV shows that brought together people who had been separated for a long time. One show brought people who had been adopted together with their biological parents. Sara cried along with them as they met for the first time.

  What kind of people are the Lapps anyway? she fumed. Was this letter their way of saying I’m no big deal?

  Sara�
�s stomach growled, so she set the letter aside and went to the refrigerator to see what she could grab to eat. An idea had just occurred to her, and she needed something to nibble on while she pursued her search. “I don’t know why I didn’t think to do this before.”

  Sara went to the living room and brought her laptop out to the kitchen table. After signing on, she dug out a box of crackers and a jar of peanut butter from the cupboard. That would be easy to eat while she googled some information.

  After making a few cracker sandwiches and pouring herself a glass of iced tea, Sara returned to the kitchen table. Using Google Maps, she took the return envelope and typed in her grandparents’ address. After hitting Enter, the site pinpointed exactly where Willis and Mary Ruth Lapp lived.

  She changed the screen to the Satellite view and zoomed in. “Well here’s something I didn’t realize. They live on a farm.” Sara studied the rooftop of the farmhouse and a barn. Surrounding the property were fields and a lot of open space. Maybe this is what they meant by being busy this summer. Depending on what they grow, it could take up a lot of their time to farm the place. I wonder if anyone lives there with them, or if they have to hire help with the place.

  Sara continued to stare at the screen. So this is where my mother grew up. Seeing the map of her grandparents’ place made Sara even more determined to go there and meet them. No matter how the Lapps felt about her, she needed to see for herself what they were like and give them a chance to get to know her. If anything good came of meeting them, maybe she would find out who her real father was.

  When a knock sounded on the back door, Sara shut her laptop, put the letter back in the envelope, and tucked it inside her purse. No doubt it was Dean. The last thing she needed was for him to see the letter and ask a bunch of questions. Learning about Mama’s parents is none of his business. If Mom had wanted Dean to know, she would have told him.

  Strasburg

  “Before we begin your first lesson, I have a question for you,” Ezekiel said as he and Sara stood beside his horse and buggy.

  “What’s that?” With an anxious expression, she glanced at Big Red.

  “Since you won’t be staying here permanently and will be returning to your English world at some point, how come you want to learn to drive a horse and buggy?”

  She turned her head to look at him. “I think it’ll be fun, and it will give me a better understanding of my grandparents’ way of life. Of course,” she added, “after seeing my grandpa get hurt when he tried to teach me, I’ll admit I am a bit nervous.”

  “The accident really wasn’t your fault. You weren’t used to Bashful, and she wasn’t used to you.” Ezekiel shrugged. “Besides, your grandpa wasn’t seriously hurt, and he’s doing better now.”

  “Yes but not well enough to do all the chores on his own.” Sara pointed across the yard. “Which is why Brad will be coming over later today to mow the lawn.”

  “Speaking of Brad, I saw you with him last night at the festival in Lititz. Were you two on a date?”

  Sara’s ponytail swished as she shook her head. “He drove me there, and we walked around together for a bit, but it wasn’t a date.” She pointed at Ezekiel. “I saw you and Lenore there too. Were you on a date?”

  He pulled his fingers along his cheek bone, realizing he’d neglected to shave this morning. “Course not. I’ve known Lenore since we were kids, and there are no romantic feelings between us. Least not on my part anyway.”

  “Then why were you with her last night?”

  “We shared a ride in her driver’s vehicle. We were together for a few minutes when we first got there, but then we went our separate ways.” Ezekiel opened the door on the right side of the buggy. “I don’t know why we’re standin’ here talking about this anyway. I’ve got a lesson to teach, and you have some learning to do about driving a horse.” He paused, sliding his tongue over his lips. “Say, before we begin, I have a favor to ask.”

  “What’s that?”

  “If I teach you how to drive a horse and buggy, would you be willing to teach me to drive a car?”

  Sara’s auburn eyebrows lifted high on her forehead. “You said before that you don’t own a car.”

  “Not yet, but I’ve been eyeballing a truck that’s for sale in the area. I wasn’t sure if I wanted it, but I’m actually thinkin’ about buying the truck now.”

  “Are you allowed to do that? I thought Amish people didn’t drive cars. Isn’t that why you hire English drivers to take you some places?”

  Ezekiel struggled not to roll his eyes. Wasn’t Sara listening when they’d had this conversation before? Or maybe she’d just forgot. “You’re right.” He tried not to sound perturbed. “Once a person has joined the Amish church, they are not allowed to own or drive a car. My folks hire a driver if they need to go outside the area or if a trip takes more than ten or fifteen miles by horse and buggy.”

  “What do they have against cars?”

  “It’s not the vehicle itself. The Amish believe owning a car could lead to a tearing apart of family, church, and community. And people who have cars tend to be away from home more, which can make the community more scattered.” He frowned. “My dad says owning a fancy car could easily become a symbol of pride.” Ezekiel pushed his straw hat farther back on his head. “Since I haven’t joined the church, I would be allowed to buy a car. Only thing is, my folks—especially Dad—are against it. So if I get the truck, I’ll need to park it someplace else ’cause I’d never be allowed to keep it on my parents’ property. That’s something Dad’s made very clear to all his children.”

  Sara shook her head. “I didn’t realize Amish parents were so strict. I heard some of them looked the other way when their young adult children went through their running-around years. Rumspringa. Isn’t that what it’s called?”

  “Yeah. The Pennsylvania Dutch word for it is rumschpringe. It’s a time that allows Amish young people who have not joined the Amish church yet to experience the modern world. Of course, some get this privilege and some don’t. It varies from church district to district.”

  “Do you get to wear English clothes during that time of running around?”

  He nodded. “Course not all Amish teens and young people do. Some are content to wear Amish clothes, and they just enjoy the freedom of going to movies, dances, or taking long trips with their friends. A couple of my friends went to Disney World during their running-around time, and my cousin Raymond spent some time in Sarasota, Florida.”

  “I see.” Sara shook her head several times. “Boy, there are so many things I still don’t know about the Amish.”

  “Such as?”

  “I’m curious to hear how the Amish religion began.”

  “Well, the Amish people are direct descendants of the Anabaptists of sixteenth-century Europe. The Anabaptist religion came about during the Reformation.”

  Sara tilted her head to one side. “Anabaptist is a word I’ve not heard before. What exactly does it mean?”

  “The term first started out as a nickname that meant ‘rebaptizer’ because this group rejected the idea of infant baptism.”

  “How come?”

  “An infant doesn’t have a knowledge of good and bad.”

  She stood quietly, gazing at the ground. She slowly lifted her head. “Is that it? Or is there anything else about the Anabaptists you’d like to share?”

  “I can tell you more if you like.”

  “Sure, go ahead.”

  Ezekiel wasn’t sure why Sara would be so curious about the Amish, but he was willing to share what he knew. Maybe her curiosity had to do with the fact that her grandparents were Amish and she wanted to know and understand them better.

  “Before they came here to America, the Anabaptists were seen as a threat to Europe’s religious and social institutions, so they were often persecuted.”

  Her eyes widened. “Seriously?”

  “It’s true. And some of the things that were done to them were so horrible it’s hard to t
alk about.”

  Her eyes darkened. “That is so sad.”

  “Yeah. No one should be persecuted for their religious beliefs.” Ezekiel folded his arms while shifting his weight. “Another thing you might find interesting is that the Amish religion is a branch of the Swiss Mennonites. The group got its name from its founder, Jacob Amman. Another leader was named Menno Simons, and the people who followed him were called, ‘Mennonites,’ ” he explained. “Eventually, those who followed Jacob Amman formed a new group known as the Amish.”

  Sara stared at Ezekiel with widened eyes. “Wow, you sure do know a lot about the Amish religion.”

  “Well I should, seeing as to how I was raised in an Amish home. And actually, most Amish don’t like to think of it as their religion, since they confess to be Christians, just as several other denominations do. They prefer to say that being Amish is a way of life rather than a religion.” He waved away a bee trying to land on Sara’s arm. “I’d be the first to admit that I don’t have all the answers concerning Amish life, but having attended church with my folks ever since I was a baby, I’ve learned a lot.”

  “Yet you still haven’t made a commitment to join your family’s church?”

  “That’s right.” Ezekiel rubbed the back of his hot, sweaty neck. “So changing the subject, how about it, Sara? If I decide to buy that truck or some other vehicle, will you teach me how to drive? I’ll get a learner’s permit first of course.”

  Her forehead wrinkled slightly before giving a hesitant nod. “Sure, I guess so.”

  Grinning, he clapped his hands. “Great! So hop up in the buggy and let’s be off.”

  As Michelle crawled into bed that night, she inhaled deeply. The sheets smelled so good—like fresh air. It was one of the benefits of hanging laundry outside. While it might be more work than tossing clothes in a dryer, it hadn’t taken her long to get used to pinning freshly washed laundry on the line in the Lapps’ backyard. In fact, she rather enjoyed the task.