Megan sat in a tiny chair so she could look her daughter in the eyes. “You know he’s got a job now, Bay. He probably got tied up with work.” He probably lit candles in gratitude that he wouldn’t be stuck with her.
The little girl’s big blue eyes brimmed with tears before she stared down at the pink-trimmed sneakers peeking out from beneath the hem of her white dress. “I thought he liked me a little. I thought maybe—”
With her knuckle, Megan nudged Bayleigh’s chin up. “What, sweetie?”
“I thought he might want to be my dad.”
“Oh, baby—”
Megan bit the inside of her lip to keep back the sob. If she ever saw him again, she was going to give him a gravel extracting he would never forget. He could be as mad at her as he wanted. She deserved it. But that did not give him the right to hurt this child.
As much as she wanted to pin all the blame on him, it wasn’t entirely his fault. She should have told him the truth right away. She knew better than to get so personally involved with a patient. But somehow, with Simon, it had been personal from the first moment she’d seen him. And she’d tried so hard to keep him at arm’s length but nothing had worked.
She’d harbored a small hope that he would show up tonight. Not for her. For Bayleigh. She realized now her hope was selfish, and she’d yearned to see him again. If only for a moment. To give him a piece of her mind. It was all she had left after giving him her heart.
“Simon likes you more than a little.” Megan took her daughter’s small hands into her own. “But he still misses his own little boy.”
“Maybe he wouldn’t miss him so much if he had a little girl.” Behind her glasses, Bayleigh’s blue eyes were tragic and hopeful all at the same time.
Megan couldn’t bear to see the yearning for what could never be. What a mess she’d made of both their lives. She fussed with the angel costume, straightening the wings Simon had engineered, then attached to the long-sleeved white satin dress her mother had made. He’d fashioned a halo from leftover scraps and Megan fiddled with it, making sure it was upright. Bayleigh’s golden hair gleamed in the overhead fluorescent lights.
“You know Grammy and Grampy are already in their seats in the auditorium, saving a place for me. They can’t wait to see how you look.”
“Children, it’s time to line up.” The teacher stood in the front of the room. “We have to go on in fifteen minutes.”
Following her directive, there was a flurry of noise as parents guided their little ones into the line and, with one last fond, nervous look, left.
“It’s time for me to go.” Megan gave Bayleigh a hug and kiss. “Knock ’em dead, sweetie.” She felt someone behind her as she released her child.
The little girl stepped back, looked up and squealed, “Simon!” She squeezed past the chair and threw herself at his legs. “You’re here.”
Megan turned to see him. She couldn’t look at him hard enough. She was so sure he wouldn’t show up. At the same time she was so angry at him she couldn’t see straight.
He went down on one knee and pulled Bayleigh into his arms. “Hey, kiddo. You look like an angel.”
She giggled. “That’s what I’m s’posed to be, silly. Mommy said maybe you had to work, but I knew you’d come.”
“I had some things to work through,” he said, looking at Megan. “But I’m here now. Nothing comes before family. I just wanted to say hi. You better go get in line now.”
“Okay,” she said, nodding.
“I saw your grandparents. They’re saving seats.” He straightened the halo again. “I’ll be up front. Right beside your mom.”
She nodded and started to follow the other children, then she threw herself against him. “I love you, Simon.”
“I love you, too.”
The sight of Bayleigh’s golden head and his dark one so close together squeezed Megan’s heart and churned up all the tenderness inside it. She had a lump the size of a grapefruit in her throat.
Bayleigh looked him in the eyes and said, “I’ll try to help you not miss your little boy.”
He swallowed hard. “I’d like that very much,” he answered in a deep, husky voice.
“If you love me and I love you does that mean you’re my dad?”
“That’s up to your mom.”
“Bayleigh, it’s time to get in line,” the teacher reminded her gently.
Simon tapped her nose. “You’re going to get left behind. Break a leg.”
“Huh?”
“That means good luck.”
Megan’s chest hurt, and she couldn’t think of a single cardiac medication that would help. She couldn’t seem to draw enough air into her lungs. And, most of all, she wanted to cry.
“See you later, Simon.”
“Count on it.”
Then Bayleigh hurried off, following the three wise men as they lined up with the other children in costume. Their teacher led them from the room and a couple of parents followed. Then she was alone with Simon in a kindergarten classroom.
“Hi.” He stood, then glanced over his shoulder at the empty doorway. “She looks great.”
“Yeah. I didn’t think you’d come,” she said, standing, too.
“I had a visit from a wise woman.”
“I didn’t know Janet would go to see you. I just thought she should know that you knew—well, you know.”
“I know.” His mouth tilted up at the corners. “A while back she told me I was living in perpetual midnight. That darkness and gloom were my best friends.”
“Sounds like Janet.”
“And would you like to know what else this wise woman said to me?”
“Yes?” She looked up at him, unable to read the expression in his eyes. “No? Maybe?”
“After she finished beating the crap out of me—verbally speaking,” he clarified, “she said I love you.”
“Janet loves you?”
He laughed. “No. Well, yes, but not that way. I’m botching this so badly.” He ran a hand through his hair. “Why is it so hard with the most important things?”
“I’m not exactly sure what you’re trying to say. But I have something you need to hear. After that, you may not want to say any more.”
“Okay.” He stuck his hands in his pockets.
He looked good—plaid sport shirt, brown slacks, coordinating jacket. Casual. Wonderful. She’d been nervous when she first saw him. Now, she felt like the condemned with nothing to lose.
Her chin lifted as she met his gaze. “Bayleigh let you off the hook because she’s only five. She was easy. I’m not. You made her love you. You promised to be here, and she thought you weren’t coming. If you’d spoiled this for her—how dare you do that to her?”
“You couldn’t possibly know—”
“Don’t tell me I don’t understand. I know you’ve been to hell and back. Maybe I should have told you the truth right away. I didn’t. That’s my mistake. But it doesn’t give you the right to hurt my child. You insinuated yourself into our lives—in spite of my objections. That comes with responsibilities. Top of the list is not breaking promises.”
“If anyone understands that, I do,” he said solemnly. “It’s why I’m here. That and the fact I admire you more than you can possibly know. Protecting and defending Bayleigh above everything. That’s the way it should be. I know better than anyone.”
“Protect and defend? Sounds like LAPD.” Her bubble of fury was beginning to lose air. That was bad. As soon as it was gone the pain would hit.
“Megan, you’re absolutely right. I handled it badly. My only excuse is—” He sighed. “I have no excuse. There is no good reason for hurting Bayleigh. I swear it will never happen again. And I hope you’ll accept my apology.”
The mad disappeared. Gone. Poof. An aching sadness with overtones of pain filled her from the pit of her stomach all the way to her heart.
She nodded. “Forget it, Simon. I have to go find my seat now.” She started to slide past him.
“Wait. There’s one more thing I have to say.” He took her hands in his. “The last time I saw you—when you said you were sorry you love me, did you mean it?”
“That I love you? Or that I was sorry?”
“Never mind.” He sighed. “I just want to say I love you. And I will never, ever be sorry.”
That did it. The tears she’d been trying desperately to hold back overflowed and trickled down her cheeks.
Concern darkened his eyes. “Don’t cry. Please. I hate myself for hurting you like this. I promise, if you’ll give me another chance, I’ll make it up to you.”
“No. I need—”
He shook his head. “Don’t you dare tell me that. I know I haven’t given you any reason to trust me. But I swear I’m not like him. I won’t turn my back on you and Bayleigh when you need me most. Not now. Not ever.” His grip on her hands tightened almost painfully as dark intensity glowed in his eyes.
“It’s not that. I know you’re not like him.” She shook her head. “I didn’t mean no. I meant finding out the way you did was a shock. As much as I’d like to, I can’t blame you for being angry with me.”
“I’m not mad. I’m an idiot. But I’m finally at peace with the past. Or maybe it took you to get through to me. To give me a reason to live, to love, to take a chance again.” He stared into her eyes and myriad emotions swirled in his own. “But if you can’t forgive me—”
“Of course I can. I love you.”
“As simple as that?”
“Of course it’s not. I want to stay mad. You’re not the only one afraid to take a chance, you know.”
“I know.” He cupped her face in his hands, brushing the moisture from her cheeks with his thumbs. “But what else can you do when you love someone?”
Megan’s eyes drifted closed. When his lips grazed hers in a sweet kiss, she couldn’t suppress a sigh of utter contentment.
Then she looked at him. “So where do two cowards go from here?”
“All the way,” he said. “Simon says marry me.”
Her eyes widened. “You don’t waste any time.”
“I’ve wasted too much time already. Waiting won’t make it any more right. You’re a moonlight kind of gal, and I’ve waited my whole life for you. I love you and I want to be Bayleigh’s father. The question is—can you trust me to do that?”
She smiled through her tears. “Absolutely.”
“How can you be so sure?”
“A man who grieves as deeply as you is capable of love in direct proportion. That’s a whole lotta love.” She nodded. “There’s not a question in my mind. Bayleigh would be a lucky little girl to have you for her father.”
“Does that go for husbands, too? Because I want more than anything to be yours. I promise to spend the rest of my life making both of you happy. What do you say?”
“I say we’d be fools to turn our backs on this miracle. I say, yes, I’ll marry you.”
He grinned and her knees went weak. “Then Nurse Brightwell, I think we should seal the bargain with some serious mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.”
“Okay. And I’ve always wanted to say this—kiss me, you fool.”
And he did.
After existing in midnight, moonlight and miracles were the very best medicine.
ISBN: 978-1-4268-6782-8
MIDNIGHT, MOONLIGHT & MIRACLES
Copyright © 2003 by Teresa Southwick
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*The Marchetti Family
**Destiny, Texas
Midnight, Moonlight & Miracles Page 21
