Old Wounds

by Vicki Lane

  Elizabeth Goodweather frowned. The frantic whisper of Saturday’s call was gone—Rosemary’s tone was calm and perfectly controlled—maybe a little too controlled.

  “Sweetie, you know I love for you to come home whenever. We’ve hardly seen you at all since you bought your house. Laurel was complaining just the other day that it’s been months…and I’d love to go with you to Cherokee—someone was telling me recently how good the museum is—but, Rosie, did you say Booger Dance? Are you serious? What’s a Booger Dance and what does it have to do with Maythorn?”

  “I’m not sure, Mum…but I think it’s important. It’s something that came to me as I was writing the story. You know I went with Maythorn a few times to visit her grandmother over in Cherokee. Remember, she was called Granny Thorn and she was a full-blood Cherokee—living on the Qualla Boundary. Anyway, one of my last memories of Maythorn is her telling me how she was making a mask for the Booger Dance so she could stop being afraid of someone. I went online and found out what I could about the dance. It all seemed really familiar…like I’d seen it. I’m not sure; maybe Maythorn’s granny took us to one that last weekend we stayed with her. Or, I don’t know—it’s vague; maybe she just told us about it.

  “And then…it seemed like more and more memories of those two years started coming back to me, from the first time I saw Maythorn to right before…right before she disappeared…and I remembered a bunch of things she told me. Mum, I don’t know what’s important and what isn’t but I do know I have to follow this to the end.”

  Phillip Hawkins looked at the clock. This was his first semester of teaching criminal justice at AB Tech, Asheville’s two-year community college, and he had a class at ten. There was still time. He reached for the telephone.

  No. He clicked off. What was it she said? Like a hound dog with too many pups? I need to back off—Elizabeth’s got enough on her mind right now.

  He stared at the phone, still undecided. Saturday night had been the first time he’d seen her cry—Sam mentioned that about her, how she almost never cried, tried to hide it, like it was a weakness.

  Back in their navy days, during those last long months before they were discharged, back when the one thing that loomed in their minds couldn’t be spoken of, he and Sam Goodweather had fought against the boredom, the danger, and the loneliness by talking about their girlfriends. Phillip had not met Elizabeth—would not meet her till years later at Sam’s memorial service—but he had known from the picture Sam carried that though she was not really beautiful, her long dark brown hair and startling blue eyes compelled you to look again.

  Sam had told the story over and over—how he’d gone into a used bookstore in Tampa, while home on compassionate leave, in search of something to take his mind off the past, something that might give him a new direction. He’d been browsing the cluttered back room when he spotted a battered copy of Walden, a book he’d been meaning to read for years.

  “I reached for it just as this tall girl with dark hair down to there reached for it too. My hand touched hers, and I swear to god, it was like a goddam jolt of electricity. Then she looked at me with those blue eyes and that was it. It was like I couldn’t get my breath.”

  The tall girl had insisted that they flip a coin for the book. She had won the toss but when Sam invited her for coffee that turned into lunch and she learned that he was on his way back for his final tour of duty, she gave the book to him, first writing her name and address in it. A correspondence had ensued, and a little over a year later, soon after Sam’s discharge, they had married.

  And me, I married Sandy. No electricity there. Just a pregnancy that wasn’t. A pretty, empty-headed, little cheerleader with a cute giggle…at least, it was cute for the first month or so. Hawkins glanced toward the bookshelf where he kept framed photos of his son and daughter. Still, there were some good times—and the kids, they were worth it. I don’t know, maybe if I’d had a different job, we’d still be together. Maybe.

  He shrugged his shoulders and ran his hand over his shiny scalp. Nah, Sandy’s happier with her life now than she would ever have been with me. She’s got a nice tame husband who goes antiquing with her and plays bridge and crap like that.

  Phillip looked again at the pictures of his children. Good kids, both of them. But they’ve got their own things going now—Seth keeps talking about bringing Caitlin to Asheville so I can meet her. And Janie—

  Abruptly he picked up the telephone again and hit the familiar number. The harsh burr of the busy signal taunted him. He waited briefly and touched REDIAL. Once again the mocking busy signal rasped in his ear. Glancing at the clock, Phillip Hawkins muttered a brief imprecation, threw down the phone, and hurried out the door.

  ROSEMARY AND MAYTHORN

  June 1984

  WHY ARE YOU living in a barn? The solemn little girl stared down at Rosemary from the top of the granite outcropping. My mama says you’re hippies.

  Eight-year-old Rosemary, climbing laboriously up the slopes of the mountain pasture, a stout hickory stick clutched in one hand, was deep in her pretend of an explorer in unknown lands. At the unexpected sound of a voice, she glanced up in surprise. Two dark eyes in a brown face, half-hidden by a thick shock of black bangs, regarded her steadily from the top of the big rock that she had marked as the goal of her exploration.

  We are not either hippies. My grandmother says that, too, but we’re not ! We’re the Goodweathers. And this is Full Circle Farm. My mum named it. And we’re just living in the barn till Pa and Uncle Wade can get our house built.

  Rosemary pointed down the mountainside to a flat, bulldozed area where two shirtless, tanned men in work boots, straw hats, and cutoff jeans were busy installing a window in the unfinished shell of a modest house. A tall, slender woman in a blue work shirt and faded jeans toiled up the steep road that led to the building site from the barn below. A thick braid of dark hair hung nearly to her waist. In one hand she carried a thermos jug while with the other she held tightly to the unwilling fist of an energetic redheaded toddler. The child broke loose and tried to outpace her mother but soon took a tumble and sat down hard on her overalled bottom. Resisting any attempts to help her up, the child staggered to her feet, and ran. Once again her tiny boots slipped on the gravel and the scene was repeated.

  That’s my mum and my little sister. Rosemary jerked her head negligently in their direction. Her name’s Laurel. She’s only three and a half and she can be a pest.

  I have a little sister named Krystalle and she’s a pest too. The dark child patted the rock beneath her in a proprietary manner. You want to come up on Froghead?

  Is that its name? Rosemary scrambled up the steep slope and climbed onto the tilted surface of the big rock protruding like a granite thumb from the mountain pasture. She moved cautiously up the incline and lowered herself to lie on her belly beside the other child. Who named it?

  Me. The dark girl patted the rock again as if it were a living creature beneath her. It’s one of my special places. I know all about this mountain. My mama stays so busy with Krystalle that she doesn’t care what I do. Long as I get home for supper. A lean brown arm indicated a knapsack that lay beside a pair of binoculars. I pack my lunch and sometimes I stay out all day.

  I’m Rosemary. What’s your name? Rosemary cast an admiring glance at the other child’s long straight black hair and bronze skin. You look like an Indian.

  I am an Indian. Granny Thorn’s a full-blood Cherokee and my real daddy was mostly Cherokee. My true name is Mary Thorn Blackfox but mostly everyone calls me Maythorn. My mama told them at the school that my last name is Mullins now, ’cause my real daddy’s dead and she’s married to Moon.

  Moon? Is he an Indian too? Rosemary propped herself up to look at this interesting stranger more closely.

  No, he’s just ordinary. Maythorn pulled the binoculars to her and trained them on the big pear tree near the house site. The two men, the woman, and the redheaded child were sitting on a stack of lumber in the shade of
the tree while the men drank from tall glasses.

  Is one of those men your daddy? Slim brown fingers adjusted the binoculars for a closer view.

  He’s the one wiping his face with the red bandana. Now he’s tickling Laurie. His name’s Sam but I call him Pa. The other one’s Uncle Wade. He’s Pa’s brother and he’s staying here this summer to help build our house.

  Hmmph. The binoculars stayed in place. I figured they were brothers—both with red hair and all. The lenses turned toward Rosemary. Do you like your uncle?

  Rosemary wrinkled her brow at the glittering lenses. What do you mean? He’s my uncle! He’s really funny and nice and he tells dumb jokes all the time. The impassive lenses continued to hold her gaze. And he’s teaching me how to play the harmonica. Why wouldn’t I like him?

  Dunno. The binoculars turned back to survey the scene below. The tall woman was rising and the toddler shook her head violently, stamped her foot, and attached herself, limpet-like, to her uncle’s leg. The mother squatted down to look her daughter in the eye, spoke a few words, and slowly Laurel released her hold. The storm passed and the little girl grabbed the empty jug, waved a cheerful good-bye to the two men, and set off pell-mell down the road, the jug bumping the gravel with every step. Her mother hurried after her, pausing to look up the mountainside in Rosemary’s direction.

  Instantly Maythorn lowered the binoculars and flattened herself against the rock. Rosemary lifted up and waved in her mother’s direction. I’m up here! It’s really cool! There’s a—

  Below, Elizabeth, with one eye on Laurel, who was nearing the old tobacco barn—their home for the duration—waved abstractedly at her older daughter and called out, Okay, Rosie, just don’t go any farther off. I’ll ring the bell when it’s lunchtime. Be careful up there.

  She turned and hurried after the fast-moving little redhead, who was disappearing through the open doors of the barn loft.

  Mum’s got to watch Laurel all the time. There’s holes in the barn floor she could fall right through. Pa and Uncle Wade fixed a safe corner for her—kind of like a corral. There’s an old rug that covers the floor and we put her bed and all her play things on it. There’s a kind of fence around the rug and she’s not supposed to try to get out.

  Where do you sleep? Maythorn’s binoculars moved to the barn and studied the picnic table and rocking chairs under the raw new shed at the side of the barn.

  We all have mattresses on the floor and sleeping bags on top of them. Except for Uncle Wade—he has his own tent in the other barn, that little one behind those trees. My special place is in the corner across from Laurel. I have a rug, too, and a bookshelf with my favorite books—the rest of them are in boxes down below till the house gets done. And I have a trunk for my clothes and a box for my very most important stuff. It’s like camping out, except we don’t have to worry about rain. And when it does rain, it sounds cool hitting the metal roof, like a million fairies tap dancing. Sometimes I wish we could live in the barn forever. We have kerosene lamps at night and we sit outside and watch the lightning bugs. And we bathe in the branch or in a big round tub if we want hot water. It’s really fun.

  Maythorn abandoned the binoculars and rolled onto her side, leaning on one elbow to study Rosemary. Do your mama and daddy yell at each other much? Mine do. I’m glad I have my own room to get away from them. I wouldn’t want to live all together like you do. That’s why my mama said you all are hippies.

  No, they don’t yell at each other! Rosemary was aghast at the idea but, after brief consideration, added, Sometimes Pa yells when things mess up—like when the truck wouldn’t start yesterday. He yelled and said bunches of bad words but he wasn’t mad at any of us.

  What were the bad words he said? Maythorn gazed with interest toward the house site, where Sam Goodweather was hoisting another window into place.

  I’m not allowed to say them. But I guess I could spell them for you. He said D-A-M and S-H

  A cowbell clanked and Rosemary jumped to her feet. I have to go now. She paused, reluctant to leave her newfound friend. You could come down and eat lunch with us. There’s plenty. I could show you my books and stuff.

  No, thanks, I’ve got my lunch right here. And I’ve got some other jobs before I go home, some other things I have to see about.

  What do you mean? You’re just a kid—and it’s summer vacation! What do you have to see about?

  Things. It’s my job. Maybe I’ll come down another day.

  The bell sounded again, louder and longer. Laurel was standing at the edge of the shed, waving the cowbell wildly from side to side.

  Okay, maybe another day. See ya. Rosemary slid off the rock and started down the slope. A thought struck her and she whirled to address the binoculars that were following her retreat.

  Maythorn, what kind of job? What do you do?

  The sun glinted on the lenses, throwing bright lances into Rosemary’s blinking eyes.

  I’m a spy, said Maythorn. I find out stuff.

  Lunch was on the table in the welcome shade of the new shed. Bread and cheese, cold cuts, crisp green lettuce, and thick slices of tomato were heaped on two old ironstone platters. Elizabeth was fixing a plate for Laurel—five carrot sticks, half a cheese sandwich with tomato, no lettuce. No mustard, mayo on the slice of bread next to the cheese, not the one next to the tomato. Perched on a cushion atop the picnic table’s bench, Laurel swung her legs and drummed her plastic cup on the table while singing the ABC song, loud and tuneless.

  Hey, Rosie, did you have a good adventure? I saw you up on that big rock. Her father smiled his crinkly smile at her. Better wash your hands, Punkin.

  Uh-oh, Sam, don’t you remember? Uncle Wade’s mouth turned down in a sad expression. We used up all the water in the branch. Rosie’ll have to wash her hands with something else. Maybe leaves…or rocks…or—

  Uncle Waa-ade, that’s silly. You couldn’t possibly use it all up! Rosemary made a face at her uncle and hurried off to the little stream, where a wooden trough set over a big rock provided a steady flow of icy, clear water. A bar of soap sat on a nearby rock and a faded green towel hung from a convenient spicebush.

  When she returned, her mother had already made her a sandwich—just right—with lettuce, tomato, sliced turkey, and mayonnaise. She slid onto her place on the bench and the family held hands as Sam said, Let’s be thankful.

  The brief blessing done, they ate. Everyone was starving—it had been hours since breakfast—but Rosemary was full of her news. She swallowed her first huge bite of sandwich and announced, I have a new friend. She’s a real Indian and her name is Maythorn.

  2.

  EVERLASTINGS

  Wednesday, October 5

  “Aunt E?” Ben’s lanky frame filled the doorway. “I need to talk to you.”

  Elizabeth looked up from the wreath she was constructing. A giant hoop of twisted grapevine, nearly five feet across, lay on the worktable before her, surrounded by baskets of dried herbs and flowers. Branches of silvery-needled, aromatic lavender jostled pungent green-needled rosemary. Spikes of deep purple lavender blooms, olive-green bay, velvety convolutions of blood-red cockscomb celosia filled the baskets, as did the seedpods of iris, poppy, nigella, and lotus, all gathered at summer’s end. Willow hampers held masses of airy white baby’s breath and clouds of hydrangea in moody blues and mauves that whispered of tea gowns and fin de siècle decadence. Along the workshop’s back wall, sheaves of cattails and ornamental grasses drooped elegantly from tall wooden crates.

  Half of the wreath’s framework was already covered with swathes of the dried foliage, painstakingly wired in bunches onto the bare vines. Elizabeth reached for a handful of rosemary branches and, nodding at her nephew, began to trim them to a uniform length. “Sure, Ben, what’s up?”

  But he hesitated in the door, sunlight haloing his red-gold hair. “I’ve got the van all loaded for a delivery run and Julio’s going with me—he’s going to drive.”

  “Okay…?” Elizabeth twisted g
reen wire around the clump of rosemary, forming a tight little bouquet. Ben lingered, seemingly unable to go on. Taking pity on him, she added, “It’ll be good for Julio to learn the route too—in case you or I couldn’t—”

  “Yeah, that’s what I was thinking.” At last Ben came toward her. He stood by the table, aimlessly picking up and putting down her pruning shears. Elizabeth continued with her work, trying not to reveal her growing apprehension. He’s not here to chat…but he’s having trouble saying what he came to tell me…I wonder…

  “Big wreath, huh? Must be a special order.”

  She gathered a handful of the hydrangea blossoms and made another bouquet. “Yep, it’s for the show house in that fancy new development up on Turkey Run. Evidently it has a huge stone fireplace and they needed something this big to hang above it.”

  “Development!” The word was flung at her like a curse. “Why can’t things stay the same? They’re going to ruin this county—turn it into something like Gatlinburg—waterslides and cutesy gift shops and shit!” He jabbed the pruning shears into the scarred surface of the worktable. “I hate how Marshall County’s changing. When I used to visit, back when you all first moved here, there wasn’t all this…this crap.”

  Thump. Thump. Thump. The sharp tip of the shears dug little triangular gouges into the unfinished pine. “And all these new people! Driving fancy foreign cars and they’re walking around Ransom in overalls, for god’s sake, like they think that’ll make them fit in.” Thump, thump, thump. Three more gouges were added to the tally. “And they’re buying up the old buildings and turning the town into a different place. A gourmet deli where the old dime store used to be! And an Internet café next door!”