Nick and Tesla's Robot Army Rampage

by Bob Pflugfelder

  “You mean the Wonder Hut lady?” Silas’s eyes went wide. “No way.”

  “Way,” said Tesla. “And it’s time to stop her.”

  She spun and bolted for the store’s front door, with Nick, DeMarco, and Silas right behind her.

  “What’s the plan?” Nick asked Tesla as they rushed up Main Street.

  “Who says we need a plan?” DeMarco said. “We’ll just run in and grab her.”

  “Right.” Silas nodded firmly and cracked his knuckles. “Then we’ll tickle her till she tells us where the comic book is.”

  “Guys, that is a plan,” Nick pointed out. “A really bad one.”

  “Why?” DeMarco asked.

  “Because Dr. Sakurai’s got exploding robots and she probably knows we’re coming.”

  “Oh. Right.”

  “I still think the tickling would work,” Silas said.

  “Could you guys just be quiet and let me think for half a block?” Tesla snapped.

  The boys went silent.

  It took them nine seconds to go half a block.

  “So?” Nick said.

  “Okay,” said Tesla, “here’s what we’re going to do …”

  Tesla and DeMarco marched into the Wonder Hut with all the confidence they could muster. Between the two of them, they could muster a lot. That’s why they were the two marching in.

  Still, Tesla couldn’t help but feel a little queasy as she locked eyes on Dr. Sakurai.

  She was reading something spread out on the countertop near the cash register. Lining the shelf behind her were what Tesla now knew to be her minions. Her own private robot army.

  Dr. Sakurai had been busy. There were even more propeller-topped robots than the day before. A dozen in all, packed in around the robot pirate she’d tried to give Barry Dobek for the Treasure Trove.

  Would she send them swarming at Tesla and DeMarco the second she saw them? Or would she try to play it cool? Keep wearing a friendly mask until it was torn away by the truth?

  Dr. Sakurai looked up and locked eyes on Tesla.

  “Why, just who I wanted to see!” she said with a smile. “Do you guys know anything about Pokémon?”

  So, cool it is, Tesla thought. Well, we’ll just have to heat things up a little.

  “Uhhh, Pokémon?” DeMarco said, sounding thrown. He’d come into the Wonder Hut ready for a confrontation, not a conversation about kids’ games.

  “Yeah. I’m thinking of stocking trading cards, but I have no idea what’s popular anymore,” Dr. Sakurai said pleasantly. “There are so many listed in this catalog I don’t even know where to start.”

  “I’ll tell you where to start,” Tesla said. “With why you did it.”

  Dr. Sakurai cocked her head to the side, a look of puzzlement on her face.

  “Why I decided to start selling Pokémon cards?” she said.

  “Oh, please,” Tesla sneered. “Skip the innocent act. We know why you’ve been giving robots to all the businesses in town.”

  “Because they’re good publicity?” Dr. Sakurai said.

  “Because they’re good spies!” DeMarco barked. “That’s how you knew Mr. Kuskie had Stupefying #6. That’s how you knew where to find his spare keys. And that’s how you got into Jewelry by Angela!”

  “What?” Dr. Sakurai’s expression shifted from bewilderment to concern. “Are you two all right? You’re sounding a little … confused.”

  Tesla crossed her arms and tried to look stern.

  “This is pathetic, Dr. Sakurai,” she said. “It’s too late for bluffs, and you should know it. You saw us in the jewelry store through your little spy. You even spoke to us through it, before you blew it up. So why keep pretending?”

  “I’m not pretending anything. I honestly don’t know what you’re talking about.” Dr. Sakurai started to walk around the counter. “Why don’t you two come back to the stockroom and have a seat and a cool drink while I—”

  “No!” Tesla said, moving to block Dr. Sakurai behind the counter. “Just tell the truth! Why use your genius for evil? Why steal? Why break our uncle’s heart?”

  “Ooooo,” said Silas. “Sounds like it’s getting dramatic out there.”

  He crept to the black curtains that hung in the doorway to the Wonder Hut’s stockroom, parted them an inch, and peeped out at the store.

  “Silas,” Nick hissed. “Get away from there.”

  “All right, all right.”

  Silas turned and went back to searching the dark, cramped, cluttered room. He and Nick had snuck in through the back door a minute earlier, while Tesla and DeMarco distracted Dr. Sakurai. But so far all they’d found were stacks of models and chemistry sets and kites and the like, along with a desk covered with bills, some cleaning supplies and tools in a corner, and a pile of dusty PVC pipes outside the teeny staff bathroom.

  Curiosity the robot stood nearby. Even though it was turned off and motionless, its control pad abandoned on the desk, it still gave Nick the creepy feeling that they were being watched.

  “I thought Dr. Sakurai was going to admit everything right off the bat,” Silas said, lifting a mop and peering down into the bucket it had been sitting in. “You know, ‘Yes! It was me all along! I did it because blah blah blah!’ Like the villains always do in comic books so the good guy has time to figure out how to defeat them.”

  “In the real world, people aren’t that dumb,” Nick whispered as he rifled through the folders in a filing cabinet. All he saw were order forms and more bills. “But that’s fine. The longer Dr. Sakurai drags this out, the more time we’ll have to look for the comic book, right?”

  “I guess.” Silas put down the mop and began inspecting a grungy pink duster feather by feather. Picking good places to search obviously wasn’t his strong suit. “You know what worries me, though?”

  “What?”

  “What if Dr. Sakurai’s denying everything because she knows there’s no proof? What if she already got rid of the rings and stuff from the robbery last night? What if the comic book has already been destroyed?”

  Then your dad’s store is doomed and you’re probably losing your home, too, Nick thought.

  “Let me give you a ‘What if?’ ” he said. “What if the comic book is right here in this room, only we’re so busy talking that we end up losing our chance to find it?”

  “Hmmm,” Silas said. “Good question.”

  He put down the feather duster and started rooting through a garbage can.

  At least that was an improvement. Sort of. In a useless kind of way.

  Then again, who was Nick to judge? He hadn’t found anything either.

  He opened the last drawer in the filing cabinet, then sighed.

  It was empty.

  Dr. Sakurai still hadn’t cracked, and Tesla was growing tired of badgering her.

  “Please believe me,” Dr. Sakurai said. “None of this makes any sense to me.”

  Tesla shook her head sadly. “Why do you keep lying? The proof is all over town.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “The robot superhero in Hero Worship, Incorporated,” said DeMarco. “It’s still there—with the camera and microphone inside that you used to spy on Mr. Kuskie.”

  “Exactly. And the robot chef in Ranalli’s Italian Kitchen is probably wired up the same way,” Tesla said. “All we have to do is go get them, and we’ll have proof that you didn’t build them for free publicity. You built them to eavesdrop on people.”

  “But, Tesla—I didn’t build those robots at all.”

  “Oh, sure,” Tesla said. “Then where did they come from? They didn’t just hatch out of little metal eggs.”

  “You’re right about that,” someone chuckled. “I built them.”

  Tesla, DeMarco, and Dr. Sakurai all turned toward the voice.

  Duncan, the Wonder Hut’s roly-poly assistant manager, was standing just inside the front door. In his arms were four small, silver shapes.

  A robot chef, a robot superhero, a robot polic
e officer, and a robot dog.

  He put them on the floor in a little line, all facing Dr. Sakurai and the kids. Then he locked the front door and flipped the sign that hung from it. Instead of telling people outside “COME IN, WE’RE OPEN,” it now told them “SORRY! WE’RE CLOSED.”

  “Wonderful, aren’t they?” Duncan said, looking down at his robots. “I went around town collecting them once I knew you kids had made the connection between them and the robberies. Told everyone that Dr. Sakurai wanted to make some improvements. As if she could!”

  Duncan was wearing a parka that was far too big and bulky for such a warm summer day, and he reached into one of its oversized pockets and pulled out a black box about the size of a textbook. There were buttons and levers on one side, and Duncan took hold of a little metal nub on one edge and pulled out a foot-long antenna. Then he started pushing buttons.

  The robots on the shelf behind Dr. Sakurai began to hum, their little eyes glowing.

  “Giving the robots away was my idea, wasn’t it, Dr. Sakurai?” Duncan said. “And you were more than happy to steal credit for my work—just like you were happy to steal away the store that should have been mine!”

  “I wasn’t trying to steal credit for anything, Duncan,” Dr. Sakurai said, her soft voice trembling. “I was following your advice. Trying to build relationships around town, just like you said. As for the store, I didn’t know it was yours to steal.”

  “WELL, YOU SHOULD HAVE!” Duncan roared. “IT WAS ME WHO KEPT THIS PLACE ALIVE ALL THESE YEARS! ME! AND NOW IT’S ME WHO’S GOING TO KILL IT!”

  Tesla and DeMarco both leaned a little away from the man, as if his ravings were a hurricane blowing them backward.

  “Whoa,” DeMarco said to Tesla under his breath. “This guy’s really flipping out.”

  “Whoa,” Silas said to Nick under his breath. “This guy’s really flipping out.”

  They both were peeking through the curtains at the scene unfolding in the store.

  The little bald assistant dude, Duncan, was ranting about how he’d worked at the Wonder Hut forever and had earned the right to buy it when the original owner retired. Yet just because he didn’t have as much money as Dr. Sakurai (he spat out the name with a face-twisting scowl), he’d lost his chance. But it wasn’t over yet, because he wasn’t going to let some snooty NASA big shot make him feel like a nobody.

  “I’m so sorry, Duncan,” Dr. Sakurai said. “I had no idea I was being snooty.”

  “You weren’t,” said Tesla.

  “SHUT UP!”

  Duncan jabbed at the buttons on the control pad in his hand, and the robotic chef, superhero, cop, and dog started marching toward Tesla and DeMarco.

  Duncan pushed another button, and the propellers on the robots on the shelf began to spin.

  Dr. Sakurai squeaked with fright and ran out from behind the counter as, one by one, the robots began to rise into the air.

  “These robots are the only proof that any spying’s been going on,” Duncan said. “I built them just like my little angels. With microphones. Cameras. Everything.”

  “See! I told you!” Silas gloated to Nick. “He’s going to explain his whole scheme!”

  The robots took up positions around Dr. Sakurai, Tesla, and DeMarco, some standing on the floor, others hovering just off the ground.

  “Everything,” Duncan said again.

  Nick turned away from the curtain. Silas didn’t seem to realize what everything meant, but he did.

  The other robots were built with self-destruct devices, too. Each one was a little mobile bomb. And soon—any second, even—Duncan meant to set off those bombs. Individually, the explosions would be dangerous but not necessarily deadly. All together, though…

  Nick put a hand to his chest, clutching at the star-shaped pendant that hung there beneath his shirt. If, as he and Tesla suspected, it really was a tracking device—a link to his mom and dad’s mysterious friend, Agent McIntyre—then there must be some way to activate it or use it to send an S.O.S.

  There was no time to figure it out, though. Agent McIntyre wouldn’t be coming to the rescue. It was up to Nick to save his sister and DeMarco and Dr. Sakurai.

  Nick frantically scanned the stockroom for something, anything he could use to head off disaster. But how was he supposed to stop an army of exploding robots? What could a couple kids like him and Silas do to—?

  Hey.

  Nick’s gaze settled on the PVC pipes piled up outside the bathroom.

  Maybe. Just maybe…

  He hurried across the room and got to work.

  NICK’S

  TOTALLY IMPROVISED SUPER-SOAKER BOT BLASTER

  THE STUFF

  • 1 24-inch (61-cm) piece of PVC pipe (labeled “1¼”)

  • 1 6-inch (15.2-cm) piece of PVC pipe (labeled “1 inch”)

  • 1 end cap for the PVC pipe

  • 1 T connector for the PVC pipe

  • 1 1¼-inch-diameter (3.2-cm) wood dowel, 25 inches (63.4 cm) long

  • 2 1-inch pan head screws

  • 1 ¼-inch-wide Fender washer

  • Rubber gasket material

  • Drill

  • Screwdriver

  • Hammer

  • Sandpaper

  • Electrical tape

  Tip: Ask if the hardware store sells scrap pieces of PVC pipe. You might find the right sizes, and they’ll be cheaper than having pieces cut to order.

  THE SETUP

  1. Drill a 3⁄16-inch (0.5-cm) hole into the center of the end cap.

  2. Use the Fender washer to trace three circles onto the rubber gasket material.

  3. Cut out the circles very carefully, taking your time. Each rubber disk should be slightly larger than the Fender washer.

  4. Using the Fender washer as a guide, carefully poke a hole in the center of each rubber disk with the screw.

  5. Again using the Fender washer as a guide, mark the exact center of the end of the wooden dowel.

  6. Stack the rubber gaskets, and then use the washer and screw to attach them to the end of the dowel, as shown. This is the plunger.

  7. Test-fit the plunger in the PVC chamber; it should not be too easy or too hard to push and pull the plunger through the chamber. If the plunger is too big or drags along the inside of the chamber, use the sandpaper to sand down the rubber disks a little bit at a time until you have a snug and even fit.

  8. Wrap a few layers of electrical tape around the rubber disks while pulling the tape taut. Test-fit the plunger as you go along. You can adjust the fit by adding or removing electrical tape as needed.

  9. Place the T connector over the other end of the dowel and drill a pilot hole for a screw.

  10. Secure the T connector to the dowel with a screw.

  11. Attach the smaller (1-inch) piece of PVC pipe to the T connector to make a handle. Secure it by using either a hammer to tap it into place or PVC cement (with the help of an adult).

  12. Use the hammer to tap the end piece onto one end of the chamber to fit securely. If it doesn’t stay on or if it leaks, have an adult use PVC cement to attach it permanently.

  THE FINAL STEPS

  1. Place the end of the blaster under water and pull back slowly on the plunger handle. Air pressure will cause the chamber to fill with water. (Don’t pull the plunger too far or it will come out!)

  2. To fire, aim the blaster and push the plunger into the chamber. The harder you push, the farther the water jet will go!

  3. If your blaster leaks or doesn’t pull up water, add electrical tape to the plunger for a better seal or make new rubber disks that are a little wider.

  “So after I’d sold off that comic book and the jewelry and whatever else I could steal,” Duncan said, “I was going to burn down the Wonder Hut and use the money to start my own hobby shop.” The pudgy little man’s gaze went distant, dreamy. “The Marvel Shed. Sounds a lot cooler than ‘The Wonder Hut,’ don’t you think?”

  Tesla, DeMarco, and Dr. Sakurai all nodded ner
vously. They were clustered in the middle of the store surrounded by robots, some looking up at them from the floor, others hovering nearby like little helicopters.

  Tesla had hoped to stall for time by complimenting Duncan on his robotics and asking admiring questions about his fiendishly clever scheme. Only she hadn’t needed to say a word.

  Duncan had spent the past five minutes talking through his entire plan, complete with a long, detailed description of his struggles to find a Wi-Fi booster powerful enough to reach his apartment from Main Street but small enough to fit in a robotic dog. (The robot dog had been a pain, but what else could he build for a place called Poochie Pizzazz Pet Grooming?)

  Now that he was done with his story, he rubbed his chin pensively.

  “Well,” he said, “that about covers it. I guess this is the point where I’m supposed to say, ‘And I would’ve gotten away with it, too, if it weren’t for you yada yada yada, etc., etc.’ Only I am getting away with it. Ha!”

  Duncan started walking backward, toward the front door. He brought up the control pad in his hands and prepared to push a big red button.

  “Wait!” Tesla cried. “You didn’t tell us how you … uhhh … how you … uhhh …”

  “Knew the combination to the jewelry store safe!” DeMarco said.

  “Oh, yes!” Dr. Sakurai chimed in. “I’ve been wondering about that!”

  “Well, it should be obvious,” Duncan told them. “I was listening in when the lady who owns the place told her … hey.” Duncan shook a finger—the one that had been about to hit the self-destruct button—at his prisoners. “You’re just stalling, aren’t you?”

  Tesla, DeMarco, and Dr. Sakurai all gave him innocent “Who us?” looks.

  “Oh, no, no, no!” they said.

  “We really, truly haven’t figured everything out yet,” Tesla added.

  “All right, then. I might as well tell you, since you’re all about to—” Duncan cut himself off with an abrupt shake of the head. “Nah. I really should get going.”