Wilde Velvet

by Deila Longford

  “I’m sorry,” he whispers almost defeated. I free my hands and I place one on each side of his face, mirroring the way he’s holding me.

  “Don’t apologise. Last night is in the past and that’s where I want it to stay.” he leans in and lightly kisses me. I pull away from him when his embrace is over. “There’s something that I need to ask you.” his hands fall and rest against each side of his body. His demeanour tenses and his eyes lock onto mine. I search deep into my heart and I find my kindest smile. My hands are slightly shaking, as I edge closer to him. “I would love it if you would accompany me to Dallas as my … boyfriend.” A smirk flashes across that perfect face.

  “I thought you’d never ask,”

  LAX was busy as Jonathon and I arrived. I was surprised that yet more people seemed to recognise me. I was asked for pictures and autographs and that feeling was just so surreal. Jonathon didn’t seem to mind that I was getting attention from other guys, and I must admit that’s a quality that I adore. My previous relationship was consumed by jealousy, and it’s really heart-warming to know that Jonathon isn’t like Brandon on this matter. Check-in was also busy, but we are flying first class so we got special treatment. We were shown to a separate departure lounge, and treated to anything we wanted. There were cafes, bars and even a massage parlour were we could have eased out any tension that we may have. Jonathon bought me a latte and a magazine for the flight. He sweetly kissed me when no one was looking. He made my heart flutter into a million pieces. I feel so lucky to be with him. I never would have imagined that I would find someone like him. He’s perfect in every way possible. He’s talented, driven, successful and most of all he’s caring. All this said, I still feel a little bit nervous about him meeting my family. I am worried that someone will tell him about my past, before I have the chance to. I want to tell him when the times right. I know that I can’t keep my past from him. He deserves to know who he’s getting involved with, but you can’t blame me for stalling. I care about him so much and I even think that I love him. I don’t want to lose him. I want to spend as much time as I can with him, because I will always fear that day when I have to tell him the truth.

  The plane is taxiing along the runway and my nerves are starting to show. I can feel my heart racing, and my feet are rapidly tapping against the floor. I look out of the window, and I can see the airport moving further into the distance. The airplane turns and faces its direction. The noise of the engines is loud, and I can’t help but wonder if that sound is normal. The flight attendants are seated ready for take-off; this is the part where my heart begins to race even more. I shoot Jonathon a darting look and he senses that I am scared. He smiles at me, as he reaches out and grabs onto my hand. The engines roar even louder as the plane creeps forward. It’s slow at first and then the speed is toxic. We are rushing down the runway and I can feel the nose of the plane rising. The speed increases and the plane soars into the sky. My stomach is in knots as we climb through the clouds. I grab onto Jonathon and I rest my head onto his shoulder. He soothes me by lightly kissing the top of my head. The seatbelt sign is still on and my heart is beating franticly out of my chest. I hate flying. I always have and I always will. It’s the fear of the unknown and putting your life in someone else’s hands that gets to me. Maybe I’m just a control freak. Either way it scares the crap out of me.

  The flight was short and to my relief turbulent free. It’s a warm Sunday afternoon, and Dallas is as daunting as I remember. The city feels the same as before, but I feel completely different as Jonathon and I sit in the back of a cab. The streets remind me of my past and everything that I did. I can feel my heart numbing at the sight of the buildings. It feels strange to be back here. I have to take sharp breathes to calm myself down. I don’t want to lose my cool.

  “Dallas is beautiful. You must have loved growing up here?” Jonathon asks smiling at me. I force a smile as I reply.

  “Yeah it was … eventful to say the least.” Crap why did I say that? Jonathon looks confused and now I’m about to be interrogated.

  “Eventful? What don’t I know?” he asks raising a dark eyebrow at me. I let out a giggle as I try to play dumb.

  “What you don’t know won’t harm you,” I say giggling again. Jonathon shakes his head, and I am relieved when he lightly laughs with me. My brief moment of dread has passed and now I all I think about is seeing my mom. I haven’t seen her since that night I left Dallas. I have given my mom a hard time through the years, and I feel terrible for the way I have acted. I really want her wedding to be perfect; after all she does deserve to have an amazing day. Pete is good for my mom. He compliments her in every way, and he’s the only person I know, who actually gets her wacky sense of humour. I have really missed them and, I am really excited for their wedding.

  The wedding is being held at the Fairmont Hotel and I am rather surprised as this venue is very upmarket. As we pull up at the reception, I gasp as I take in the view. The hotel is stunning. The front reception is like nothing I have ever seen. The driver lets us out and Jonathon pays the fare. I have my overnight bag draped over my shoulder, and Jonathon has a small suitcase. We walk into the hotel and once again I am stunned. The lobby is immaculate with white marble flooring and dark oak finishing’s. Fresh flowers are nicely on display and over friendly staff welcome us as we approach them. I march up to the desk, and I inform the lady that we are here for the Harper wedding. She nods and smiles and then she hands us each a room key. Jonathon looks confused as he didn’t pre-book a room. He begins to quiz the woman about it, and she informs us that there were always two rooms booked under my name. Now I am confused. I realise that the room was for Sydney. With the panic and confusion over, a bell-boy rushes up to the front desk and kindly takes our bags from us. He smiles and urges us to follow him. Jonathon thanks the woman and he follows the red haired bell-boy. I pause as I have a question for the receptionist.

  “Excuse me but which room is the bride in?” The woman smiles at me.

  “The entire wedding party is on the same floor. I believe that your room is just two doors down from the brides.” A smile comes to my face and I thank the women for all of her help. Jonathon looks over as I slide next to him. His arm extends and wraps around my waist. He leans down and kisses the top of my head, as we follow the bell-boy into the elevator. We climb to the third floor and step out into a wide hallway. Dark wooden doors are at each side of us and we follow the help as he marches quickly to our rooms. He pauses at room 309 and he looks at me.

  “Mam this is your room,” he says as he pushes open the door. I smile at him as I step into the room. The room is spacious and has a large bed and flat screen TV. The bathroom is also quite large and the mini fridge looks inviting. The guy sets my bag down onto the bed, and he makes eye contact as he hints for a tip. I pull out a ten dollar bill and I thrust it into the guys’ hand. He smirks and says. “You have yourself a great day Mam,” I smile at his accent, and then I shoot Jonathon a kind look. He briefly smiles and mouths that he will be back. The door closes and I flop myself down onto the bed. My head hits the pillow and then I spring back up when I hear a knock at the door. I rush and when I open it, my mom is standing in front of me. I throw my arms around her and I pull her into the room. She smells like Dior perfume and I inhale deeply as that’s my mom’s trademark. I have never smelt something so wonderful. It’s the smell that takes me back to my childhood. Her face is painted in light but beautiful make-up and she is dressed in a hot pink bath robe. She’s even more beautiful than I remember. She pulls away from me and she eyes me with those deep blue eyes.

  “Oh sweetie I’ve missed you,” she gushes.

  “I know it’s been too long.” I agree. My mom pulls me over to the bed and she plants herself down. She pats the bed for me to sit and I immediately do as she says. She reaches out and grabs both of my hands and her stare deepens.

  “How are you sweetie? Is everything okay?” I smile at her.

  “Yes I’m really, really goo
d Mom.” I gush. She smiles again and I know that look.

  “Does a guy have anything to do with that smile on your face?” I blush she knows me too well. “It’s the music producer, isn’t it?” I blush again and I nod. My mom lets out a squeal. “I knew it, tell me about him. I want details.” I laugh at her words. Right now she’s acting more like my best friend than my mom.

  “He’s amazing, like really amazing.” I have an image of him in my mind and it makes me feel all warm inside. That feeling quickly disappears, when I think about someone telling him about my past. My heart starts to thump, and I realise that I need to warn my mom to not say anything. “Listen Mom there’s something that I need you to do for me.” she looks worried but she nods in agreement.

  “Well what it is sweetie?” I take a deep breath, I don’t know if she will approve of him being here.

  “Mom, Jonathon is here,” I blurt out.

  “What do you mean he’s here?”

  “Well I took your advice and asked him to come with me.” My mom shakes her head but in an approving sort of way. “Listen Mom I haven’t exactly told him about … Brandon and about everything that happened.”

  “Ashley you have to be honest with him!” My mom butts in. I roll my eyes and start again.

  “I know and I will, but not today. And I don’t want you or any of your friends gossiping to him. We’ve had a rough couple of days and I just want to spend time with him and be happy for once. Please say that you’ll do as I ask?”

  “Of course I will, but promise me that you will tell him?” I sigh at her words. I know that I have to be honest with him, but the truth is that I’m terrified of what he’ll think of me. I can’t risk losing the guy that I love.

  “Mom I’m scared of losing him.”

  “Sweetie if he’s as amazing as you say, then he won’t make it an issue.”

  “I think. I know. That I … love him and I guess that I’m just scared of losing him.” My mom pulls me in for a hug.

  “Oh Ashley,” she gasps. There’s a firm knock at the door. My mom pulls away from me, squinting her eyes as she does. I nervously rise from the bed and make my way slowly over to the door. My fingers collide with the door knob; I look back at my mom before I let him in. Her eyes meet mine and she flashes me a reassuring smile. My mom knows how to read me and she can tell that I am nervous. Her smile is warming, it gives me the confidence that I need to let him in. I twist the handle and I pull the door towards me. Jonathon is breath-taking as he stands firmly in front of me. My heart is racing and my stomach is in a thousand knots. He smiles that devilish smile and my knees turn to jelly. He edges forward with a wicked look in his eye. I sense his intentions, so I quickly make eye contact with him, and I blurt out that we have company.

  “Jonathon there’s someone that I would like you to meet.” I say grabbing onto his arm and jerking his body further into the room. He looks over the top of my head and a smile plasters that perfect face. He pushes past me and rushes towards my mom. I watch as he introduces himself. My mom is giddy and I can tell that she is stunned by his good looks. He smiles over at me as he extends his arm for me to curl up at his side. I walk over and take his offer. His hand slides onto my waist sending a chill down my spine. I look up at him and I can’t help but think about what it would be like to be with him. I imagine his kiss all over my body... I blush at the thought as my mom’s voice erupts.

  “It’s wonderful to finally meet you. My daughter has told me so much about you. I feel as if I already know you.” My cheeks burst into flames at her confession. Jonathon looks down at me and he has a smug glint in his eye.

  “All good I hope? I want to thank you for inviting me. Ashley is … very special to me, and it means a great deal to be here with her.” My mom’s approval of him is painted all over her face. She can’t contain her excitement as she lunges forward, and hugs me whilst I’m still holding onto Jonathon. I can hear him laughing as my mom squeezes me. I let her hold me until she feels secure enough to pull away. My heart is fluttering, because I feel that part of my mom’s embrace, is down to the fact that we haven’t been this close in over a year. I hated what I put her through with Brandon. I hated how mean and selfish I was. She had to deal with a lot of shit along the way. It’s been hard being apart from her. After all she is the only parent that I ever knew. All that said I feel that she needed space away from me. She didn’t care for the person that I had become. She needed time to forgive me for everything that I had done. I needed time to become myself again. I feel that I have reached my goal and that with Jonathon by my side, I can be the best version of myself.

  “I’m gonna leave you two kids alone for a bit. Now y’all don’t forget that the service starts at five, and I need you at three now Ashley.” My mom’s adoptive accent is showing. I shake my head at her, as she smiles and marches out of the room. The door closes and I blush as I turn to face Jonathon. He’s grinning from ear to ear, and he has that playful look in his eye. He lunges towards me and grabs me by the waist. He pulls me close and kisses me firmly on my lips. My stomach is flipping and my cheeks are flushing with desire. He moves his lips onto my neck as he edges me closer to the bed. His tongue collides with my skin and I get all sorts of tingles. He pulls away and locks those diamond eyes on mine. His stare is intense and very alluring. He grabs onto each side of my face as he whispers.

  “I want you Ashley. I want you to be MINE,” his voice sends chills down my spine. I know that I want exactly what he’s offering. I leap forward and plant my full lips onto his. We kiss until we fall onto the bed. He pushes me further up the bed and he takes a second to remove his white t-shirt. A sly smile plasters my face at the sight of his ripped body. He crawls to my level and he positions himself just hovering over me. He lightly falls against me as his lips meet mine once again. His tongue explores my mouth and then moves onto the skin of my neck for the second time. One of his hands slides up my inner thigh and the other cups my cheek. A moan escapes my mouth at his touch. I close my eyes and think of how long I have wanted this for. I think of how I tried to resist him. Now my reasons aren’t even clear in my own mind. I want him. I love him. He’s mine. Confidence explodes in me and I flip him over and now I’m the one who’s on top. With one embrace, I remove my vest to revel my pink lace bra. Jonathon’s smirk is obvious as he approves of my body. His hands grip my waist as he pulls me further onto his body. My loose hair is flying all over the place as our passion heats up. Jonathon slides off his jeans and he removes my shorts at the same time. As his jeans fall to the floor, he grabs them and reaches into the pocket. He pulls out a small packet. I realise what it is and I wait as he performs his duty. He flips me around and now our clothe-less bodies collide. He feels amazing. He’s amazing. His kisses flood my body as we pant together at our passion. My hands slide into his hair. His hands squeeze my breasts until we both scream out with pleasure. His spent body falls against mine. He’s done. I’m done. I can hardly breathe as he showers me with yet more kisses. His breathing is heavy and exhilarating. He lightly graces my cheek with his index finger as he whispers.

  “Te Amo!” I squint at him as I have no idea what he just said. He laughs at my confusion and then he rephrases in English. “It means I love you!” A tear forms in my eye. He loves me? I grip onto his face as my tears stream down my face.

  “You know that I love you too, right?” I say breathless and gasping for air. He rolls over onto his back and he pulls me onto his chest.

  “I do now!” I smile through my tears. He lightly wipes at my face and then he kisses the top of my head. I rest my body onto his and let out a sigh. This is it. I have met the guy that I want to be with for the rest of my life.

  Eighteen

  “Mom, you look amazing!” I gush as we stand behind two large oak doors. The wedding music is playing. The bridesmaids, flower girls and Charlie the ring barrier have all graced their way down the aisle. I look at my mom. She looks nervous as her moment arrives. There is a brief silence, and th
en Whitney Houston’s I will always love you chimes through the closed doors. I smile at my mom. I knew that she would pick that song. I am little upset. I wanted to sing it for her and Pete at their first dance. But this is my mom’s day, and thankfully she and Pete have a whole collection of special songs. I have plenty to choose from. My mom’s dress is elegant. She didn’t choose pure white, instead she opted for ivory. Her hair is fixed into a high bun and she has a string of pearls neatly placed around her bun. She looks amazing. I am so excited for her.

  “It’s time,” an usher informs us. I flash my mom a smile as I link into her arm. The doors open and I’m overwhelmed when everyone is standing facing us. My hand starts to shake, as we take our first steps onto the red carpeted aisle. My heart is racing. I spot some familiar faces who have hated me over the years. I don’t make eye contact with any of them. Instead, I put on my best smile and walk gracefully with my mom linked into my arm. We reach the alter and Pete looks handsome in his tux. He embraces me first with a kiss on my cheek, and then he winks at my mom and takes her by the hand. I take my place next to the other bridesmaids. I scan the crowd for Jonathon. He’s sitting in the front row next to Pete’s brother. He puckers his lips and air blows me a kiss. I can’t contain my smile at his action, and a gentle giggle explodes from my mouth. Gloria –my mom’s best friend gently nudges me and reminds me that I need to be quiet. I smile and apologise. She returns my gesture and winks at me in approval of Jonathon. I shake my head and focus as the reverent chimes his duties.