Merry Ex-Mas

by Christopher Murray, Victoria

  He faced me and said, "Asia, we need to talk."

  That was when it came back to me. Seeing Bobby had almost made me forget—we were about to have the talk. I was giddy again and wondered if Bobby had brought the engagement ring already, or were we going to buy it together?

  Bobby sat on the couch, and I eased down next to him. After he let a couple of moments pass, he said, "We've been together for a long time, and I never meant for things to go on like this for so long."

  I pouted, just a little, but only because he loved it when I did that with my lips. "Baby, it's okay. The past doesn't matter. It's all about what's happening now."

  His forehead creased, and that was when I realized that he really thought that I didn't know why he was here.

  I laughed. "Baby, I know what you're going to say."

  His frown deepened.

  I said, "I knew it when you said that you wanted to come over." I cupped my hands over his. "I know this is gonna be hard, but it's best for Caroline."

  Bobby flinched, but I knew why. I'd kinda broken the unspoken rule—that his wife's name was never to be spoken. But since he was about to divorce her, it didn't matter.

  I said, "And this is definitely best for me and Angel."

  His eyes narrowed.

  I guess I just needed to come out and say it. "Angel is going to be so excited when we tell her that we're getting married."

  Bobby snatched his hands away from me and jumped up like he'd been bitten by a snake. "No!" He started pacing back and forth.

  "What is wrong with you, baby?" I asked him.

  He was breathing heavy when he said, "You don't understand…I've decided…to stay…with my wife."

  Okay, now see, I had to figure out why my man had stopped speaking English.

  He said, "I'm going to be working at ESPN, and I want to change every part of my life. I want to honor my wife."

  His words literally took my breath away. But I had enough air to ask, "What did you say?"

  "I want to honor…my wife. I owe this to her."

  That fool had gone and said the wrong thing! I sprang up from the couch and got right in his face. "Owe it to your wife? What about me? What do you owe me?"

  "You'll never have to worry. I'll take care of you."

  "You think that's enough?" I could feel my neck rolling with each word. I may have been living the high life for the last ten years, but right now, every bit of my Compton-life-before-Bobby was coming out of me.

  "I'll take care of Angel, too."

  "Damn straight since she's your daughter." I glared at him. "I cannot believe this. I thought you were coming here to tell me that we were getting married."

  He looked at me as if I were the one who was speaking a different language. "I never made you that promise."

  That was when I went all the way off. I reminded him that I'd had his baby. He reminded me that he had a wife. I told him that I thought he loved me. And he said nothing—just turned his back on me.

  I don't know what made me do it. Maybe it was the ten years that we spent together or the fact that he was actually leaving me for his wife. But my fists started flying, hitting his face, his chest, anyplace where I could connect. It wasn't like I really thought my hands were lethal weapons, but I sure hoped that I would kill him. Or at the very least, I wanted to give him the beat down of his life.

  But Bobby was stronger; he held me until I calmed down, but then he was smart enough to back out of the apartment and never take his eyes off of me….

  "Mom! You've got to talk to Dad!" Angel said pushing her phone into my hand.

  I blinked. It was just a couple of seconds, but with all the emotions that I'd just relived from that morning six years ago, I really didn't feel like talking to Bobby. But with Angel standing there, staring in my face, I took the phone from her.

  "Be nice," she whispered.

  With a tilt of my head, I painted on as fake a smile as I could. “Hello, Bobby," I said in an exaggerated, affected tone that was meant to mimic his wife's.

  “Hey, Asia, what’s up?” Bobby said, sounding all chipper, as if he didn't even notice what I was doing.

  "Nothing," I said, returning to my own voice. "Angel said you wanted to speak to me."

  "Oh, yeah." There was surprise in his tone as if he couldn't believe that I wanted to get right to business.

  I understood his surprise. There were some days when I didn't feel like speaking to him, and then there were days when we would be on the phone for hours, making me sometimes feel like he was mine again. Of course, the long conversations were always under the guise of our daughter and her best interests. But when I felt like it, I could keep Bobby talking for as long as I wanted. Which was one of the reasons why I believed that I could get Bobby back if I wanted him.

  Except, I didn't want him. At least, not in the way that he wanted me. If I were to ever be with Bobby, it would have to be a full-fledged relationship. All Bobby wanted, though, was a jump-off, and I was not that chick. So I'd gotten over it, over him, and had moved on.

  Bobby said, "Well…uh…you know next week is Christmas.”

  “Yeah," I said, as I sat back in the chair and tapped in the password on my iPad. I hadn't checked my Facebook page all day, and while half-listening to Bobby, this would be the perfect time to do it.

  "Well…uh…"

  Okay, that made me pause. I knew Bobby Johnson. I knew him as if I were his wife. In fact, that's how he'd treated me—as his Los Angeles-based wife, while the woman who wore the real wifey ring stayed behind in their home in Dallas. So from the years when we were together, I knew everything about Bobby Johnson. I knew about the heart-shaped birthmark that was hidden inside his left thigh, I knew how he smelled after sex, and I knew how much of an attitude he had every time the Lakers lost a game. I knew his favorite cologne, his shirt size, suit size, and shoe size.

  And I knew that when he stuttered, something was up.

  “And uh,” he stuttered.

  "What is it, Bobby?" I asked. My "what's-up” meter was on high alert.

  After a deep breath, he said, “We-really-would-like-to-have-Angel-with-us-for-Christmas." He spoke so quickly, it sounded like his sentence was just one word.

  “What?” I shot up straight in the chair. Leaning over, I placed the iPad on the table, and that's when I caught a glimpse of Angel, standing by the door, shifting from one foot to the other.

  I'd forgotten that my daughter was still in the room, clearly listening to every word.

  "Please," Angel mouthed. "Please, Mom."

  I shook my head at Angel, and to Bobby I said, "You must've forgotten. Angel spends Thanksgiving with you and Christmas with me."

  "I know, I know," Bobby said. "But this is gonna be a special Christmas. Not only are Caroline's and my parents coming, but it's my parents’ fiftieth anniversary, and we're having a special Christmas dinner for them."

  Bobby paused, and I waited for him to tell me what all of his special plans had to do with our daughter. Bobby knew me well enough to already know that I would never give up Christmas with Angel.

  When I remained silent, Bobby said, "So…"

  I said, "So?"

  "Awww, come on, Asia."

  “No,” I said.

  “Yes!” Angel shouted.

  I didn't even bother to cover up the phone when I yelled, “Go to your room!"

  “Why? What did I do?” Angel whined.

  “I need to talk to your father…"

  “But I already know what you guys are talking about. Please, Mom! Please let me spend Christmas with Dad and Mom Caroline this year?"

  I did my best not to cringe, but I cringed anyway. Angel had been calling Bobby's wife “Mom Caroline” ever since our custody agreement had been put in place when Angel was just five.

  I hated that. Caroline wasn't a “mom” anything. She hadn't pushed and screamed a child through her birth canal. But I did my best never to complain about Caroline because, without her, Bobby might have
full custody of Angel due to the stupid move I'd made when Bobby left me.

  All I'd been trying to do was to get him back…make him pay for hurting me. I'd seen women do it on all the soap operas—so, I set Bobby up. I tried to have him arrested for molesting Angel.

  But my lies, my trick, my plan was exposed, and Bobby was livid. When he told me he was going to take Angel from me, I went on my knees to his wife. I begged her, and she talked to Bobby. Hence, shared custody.

  So even though I didn't like Caroline and she didn't like me, I tried to keep the haterade down—when it came to Angel.

  "Mom, please. Just let me go this one time," Angel said bringing me back to the present. "Let me spend this Christmas with Dad and Mom Caroline, and I promise I'll spend every holiday with you for the rest of my life." Angel's hands were pressed together as if she were praying…or begging.

  If Bobby weren't on the other end of the phone asking for something so ridiculous, I would've laughed at Angel. Always the drama queen. But I couldn't even chuckle 'cause there was not a damn thing funny.

  "Seriously, Mom. I'll be ninety and you'll be two hundred and five, and we'll still be spending Christmas together. I promise."

  I frowned. "Not funny. Now, I need to talk to your father by myself, so just step out, okay?"

  With a final pout, Angel moonwalked out of the room. "Please," she said once again. "Remember until you're two hundred and five!"

  "You're not helping your cause." I pointed my finger at Angel before I scooted from the chair and closed the door behind her. I knew my daughter; I was sure she would stay in the hallway and have her ear pressed to the door. But I didn't care what Angel heard, and in fact, she probably needed to hear some of the choice words I had for Bobby Johnson.

  Going back to the phone, I said, "Bobby, I don't know what your game is…"

  "Whoa! Game? What game? I'm just talking about spending Christmas with my daughter, and I already told you why."

  "No," I shook my head so hard, a headache wouldn't be far behind. "Angel has always spent Christmas with me."

  "And maybe that's one reason why she should spend one Christmas with me."

  "That's not part of our custody agreement."

  "I thought we were way past that, Asia. I thought I could just come to you. Didn't know I needed a court order for Christmas."

  I pressed my lips together to hold the curses back. Then, I asked, "Is that a threat?" through clenched teeth. I didn't even give him a second to respond. "Are you saying that you'd go to court, get an order, and then leave me sitting at home by myself on the one holiday that I look forward to all year?" I huffed, "Oh, that's special, Bobby. Just treat me any ole kind of way. I'm just the mother of your daughter," then, just to be mean, I added, "the only child you have."

  In the pause that followed, I could tell that I'd made my point. I didn't know why Caroline and Bobby never had children, but right now, Angel was his only child. And since that made the score one to zero—in my favor—I had the upper hand.

  "Okay," Bobby said a bit softer. "I can see where you're coming from. And I'm not trying to take Angel away from you on Christmas."

  "Good." That was all I had to say.

  But right as I was about to push the “End” button on the screen, I heard Bobby say, "Why don't you come and spend Christmas with us, too?"

  The victory I'd just felt made a U-Turn. "What?"

  "Yeah, yeah," Bobby said as if he were warming up to his own idea. "Yeah, we really would like to have you and Angel come to Christmas dinner…and your Aunt Beverly, too. We can make it a real family affair."

  A pause, and then I busted out laughing. I mean, really laughing. Like throw my head back laughing. Like soon my stomach would be hurting laughing.

  "What's so funny?"

  "You! You got jokes."

  "I'm not kidding," Bobby said.

  "You have to be. Or have you had a divorce that you haven't told me about?"

  "Oh, now you got jokes."

  "It has to be a joke if you think Caroline, your wife who hates me, would spend her Christmas with me."

  "First of all, she doesn't hate you."

  "Ninja, please. The wife always hates the mistress." I wanted to add, especially if the mistress was more beautiful. But the thing was, Caroline and I looked a lot alike. "I can promise you that Caroline doesn't want me in your home."

  "Oh, yeah? Hold on a second?"

  I had no idea why Bobby put me on hold, and I tapped my freshly pedicured toes on the floor, wishing that I'd never taken the call. This was pure foolishness, and I didn't have time. Especially since this was the Saturday before Christmas, and although I'd finished my gift shopping for everyone else, this was when I loved to shop for myself. I loved being in that mix of confusion with all the last-minute shoppers. All of that pushing and shoving—that was the real spirit of Christmas.

  With a sigh, I pulled the cell phone from my ear and looked at the minutes ticking away. Four minutes! Really? This call was already three minutes and forty-five seconds too long.

  Then, "Hello."

  I frowned but said nothing.

  "Hello," came through the phone again.

  "Uh…"

  "Asia, this is Caroline."

  "Oh…yeah." And then I grimaced. Caroline Fitzgerald Johnson always made me feel like a fool. She was one of those high-brow, well-bred women who didn't know a thing about the way I'd grown up. "What's up?" I asked, then I growled inside. What's up? Was that the best I could do?

  "Well, Bobby just filled me in rather quickly," Caroline said in what I called that upper-class tone of voice. "And, I agree. We really want Angel here with us for Christmas, and," then there was a pause that lasted so long that I thought she'd hung up, "we'd love to have you, too."

  Translation: We really want Angel, and I'll take you if that's the only way we can have her. Yeah, that's what Caroline meant. See, hoochie-game recognized hoochie-game. Now, I'm not saying I'm a hoochie, and I'll be nice and say that neither is Caroline. But we had both gotten Bobby in some kind of way. He was a star basketball player, and under those circumstances it was never an ordinary dating situation. Caroline and I had both done whatever we had to do to get that man. And that meant we both knew how the other operated.

  So, I knew what she was thinking. And I knew there was no way the wife wanted to spend Christmas with the mistress. Especially since I wasn't any ole mistress; I was a ten-year-long mistress who'd given birth to her husband's child.

  A few moments passed, but I still didn't say anything.

  So Caroline spoke up, "I'm going to put Bobby back on the phone…and I really do hope you'll join us, Asia. And your Aunt Beverly, too."

  "She'll be in New York for Christmas."

  "Oh, that's too bad…maybe next year." And then Caroline was gone.

  As I waited for Bobby to return, I paced. I had to figure this out—what was their game? What was their plan?

  When Bobby called out my name, I asked, "What are you guys up to?"

  "What?"

  "When your wife wants to celebrate with your mistress, something's up."

  "You're not my mistress…"

  “Anymore.” I said.

  “Not for the last ten years.”

  “It’s only been six years, Bobby.”

  "However long it's been, my point is that a lot of time has passed; we've been through a lot, but Caroline and Angel have their own relationship, and it’s a really good one. And not only Caroline, but her parents, too. They love Angel just like my parents do. And none of them get to spend enough time with her. This Christmas is the perfect time for that."

  His genuineness came straight through the phone. Maybe Bobby didn't have a plan. Maybe this was exactly what he said it was—just a way to bring Angel closer to his family.

  But now I had a new problem—if Bobby drew Angel closer to his family, where would that leave me? "I don't know…"

  "Okay, I respect that," Bobby said, surprising me. After he'd put
Caroline on the phone, I'd been sure that he wouldn't take no for an answer. He said, "We still have a few days; just think about it."

  "Why?"

  "Why what?" he asked.

  "I get why you want Angel there, but why me?"

  "'Cause like you said, I don't want you to be alone when there's no reason for it. Plus, it really is time for us to put the past all the way in the past and build a new future."

  I rolled my eyes. “When I think about my future, I don’t think about spending time with you and your wife.”

  “Well, we’re all a part of the same family—Angel's family. We all love her, and that's what's most important."

  That sounded good, so why didn't it feel good, too?

  He added, "And Angel wants to do this.”

  “Yeah, thanks a lot for that. Thanks for setting it up so it’s going to be hard for me to say no to her.”

  “It's still going to be your decision, so just let me know.”

  Without saying goodbye, I pressed "End" and slumped back down into my pedicure chair. "Ugh," I growled. I couldn’t believe this. There was no way to win this fight. Angel wanted it too much, and now that I was invited, there wasn't a real reason to say no.

  Except for the fact that I didn't want to spend Christmas with my ex-lover and his wife and both of their parents. What kind of celebration would that be?

  I could understand all of the grandparents wanting to spend time with Angel, but couldn't they do that at a wedding or a funeral, the way normal Americans got together?

  I shook my head. I had no idea what I was going to do.

  "Oh, holy…" and then, just before I muttered what I really wanted to say, I thought about the season and edited my words. Taking a deep breath, I said, "O' Holy…Night!"

  Chapter 4

  Sheridan

  I slipped into the booth across from Kendall and Asia. "Sorry I'm late," I said to both of them.

  "Do we look like we care?" Asia held up her martini glass as if she was about to give a toast, but then she took a sip instead. "Thank you for choosing the Martini Bar for our prayer meeting." She giggled.

  "A prayer meeting?" I said with a frown. I was about to tell Asia not to say something so blasphemous. As if I would call a prayer meeting in a bar. But I didn't have to say a word. Kendall would handle Asia; she never let her get away with anything. It was like a torque reaction—Asia opened her mouth and Kendall threatened to punch her in it. So I just sat back and waited for the battle.