Fixing Forever

by Caroline Lee

  Let the negotiations begin.

  She narrowed her eyes at him. “I like you, Andrew, and I can see this”–she dropped her hands long enough to mimic his early gesture mockingly, then returned to her pose—“going somewhere. I want it to, in fact. So here’s my proposal.”

  This was fun, wasn’t it?

  He leaned forward, planted his elbows, and matched her pose. “I’m listening,” he said seriously.

  “I propose we experiment. There’s one sure-fire way to tell if we should consider fighting for this.”

  “This being a possible relationship between the two of us?”

  She nodded, straight-faced. “Indeed.”

  “Go on,” he invited her.

  “Excellent, thank you.” She took a deep breath. “A relationship would be impossible without some…spark.”

  It was a struggle to keep his expression neutral. “You mean a physical spark. An attraction.”

  “Yes. I find you attractive already, and don’t mind the thought of kissing you.”

  “I don’t mind the thought of kissing you either.” The understatement of the year.

  She nodded once. “Excellent. Then we are in agreement to an experiment?”

  This was the oddest—and most adorable—first-kiss negotiation he could imagine. “You’re proposing we attempt a kiss, and the fate of our possible future relationship would rely on the outcome of that kiss?”

  Another nod. “Yes, but in order to be certain, we must be thorough.”

  It was almost impossible to keep a straight face, seeing her intensity. She was adorable. And how could he consider denying her? He’d wanted to kiss her from almost the moment he’d seen her, and she was correct; a kiss or two would tell them if they had a spark, which would tell them if they should bother to fight for this relationship.

  Of course, he suspected they had a bit more than a spark between them, but time would tell. As Gramps would say, they could burn that bridge when they got to it.

  Breaking eye contact with her, he lifted one finger and called for the check.

  Paying for the meal, complimenting Lin and her husband Brandon on the delicious food, and getting back into their coats took the next fifteen minutes or so.

  Was it Andrew’s imagination, or did Rachel seem as distracted as he was? Was she anxious for their experiment?

  His grin grew.

  Finally—finally!—they were outside in the cold Riston night air. Every time he exhaled, a little puff of steam hung around his face, but he wasn’t about to put on his hat or gloves just yet. Not with her bare hand still in his, their fingers entwined as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

  They strolled along the sidewalk for a few minutes until they reached a circle of light under one of the streetlamps. That’s when he felt her tug on his hand. He turned to find her stopped under the glow.

  She was peering up at him solemnly, but there was something sparkling in her eyes. “I’d like to commence our experiment now.”

  One of his brows raised along with the corner of his lips. “Now?”

  He didn’t have anyplace better, but he liked hearing her professional voice. It was so adorably different from her nervousness at the beginning of their date.

  “Please,” she added.

  So he let his smile bloom. “Gladly.”

  Clearing his throat, he settled himself squarely in front of her, and almost by rote, placed his hands on her hips. She nodded solemnly and lifted her hands to rest on his shoulders.

  “Ready?” he asked.

  She took a deep breath and nodded again. “Ready,” she said softly.

  He lowered his lips to hers. Just a light brush, a faint touch. When she didn’t pull back—in fact, she pressed herself forward, towards him—he smiled slightly and tried again. Her hold on his shoulders tightened, and she whimpered slightly as she lifted herself on her toes to reach him better.

  With a groan, he gave in to the inevitable, and kissed her the way he’d been wanting to kiss her since the moment he saw her.

  She tasted of soy sauce and cherry lip gloss and laughter. In his arms, she felt like spontaneity and wholeness and a fire suppression system tuned so well it was just a breath from going off.

  And in their chests, pressed against one another as they were, her heartbeat felt like forever.

  A spark? A spark?

  Heck, this wasn’t a spark. This was an entire electrical grid, moments away from a meltdown or an explosion, and he wasn’t going to try to stop it.

  It wasn’t until he heard his name—her voice in his ear—he realized they needed to stop.

  To reevaluate.

  Because he was in danger of doing something stupid, and with the blood pounding in his temples, he couldn’t remember why that would be a bad idea.

  Somehow, they’d migrated during their kiss, and now he had her pressed up against the brick of the building they’d been standing in front of. Her arms were around his neck, her fingers tugging at the short hairs on the back of his head. He’d been kissing her neck, and thank God she’d been sane enough to call his name, to make him remember they were in public.

  Only, the expression on her face—dazed and blissful, and very thoroughly kissed—told him maybe she hadn’t wanted to stop either.

  Breathing deeply to gain control of himself, Andrew blinked down at her. “There’s your experiment,” he said in a rough voice.

  “Successful, I believe.”

  Her tone of voice—half professional, half satiated—made him smile.

  “Imminently successful, I would think.”

  Although it did add a hitch to their plans. How much easier would it have been had they kissed and felt nothing? No spark, which told them to walk away and look for love elsewhere? But they had, and now they had to make a decision.

  Love?

  His lips curved up. No, he didn’t love Rachel yet, they’d only just met in person…but he could see it happening.

  “Yes, rather.”

  She cleared her throat and unwound her arms from around him. He stepped back, allowing her the space to straighten her jacket and her hair, and the light from the streetlamp caught the glossy sheen of both. She was beautiful.

  “So…” When she tucked a strand of hair behind her right ear, he wondered if that was a habit of hers, and what it meant. “That was…successful.”

  He grinned, because she was repeating herself. “I enjoyed myself.” That should’ve been obvious. “I’d like to try this experiment again.”

  “Yes, me too.” She ran her fingers across her ear again, even though there was no hair left to tuck. Definitely a nervous habit. “I think we should consider seeing one another again.”

  “I concur.” Best second-date negotiation ever!

  That’s when she hit him out of nowhere with, “However…”

  He blinked. “What?” Snagging her hand, he pulled her the two steps into the circle of light from the streetlamp. He wanted to see exactly what was going on in her expression. “What do you mean, however?”

  Her smile was tight when she met his eyes. “However, I have a proposition for you.”

  A sense of dread began to creep into his stomach. “Go on.”

  “It’s obvious we’re suited, and a relationship with you would be…”

  When she trailed off, he raised a brow and offered some suggestions. “Awesome? Amazingly awesome? Awesomely amazing? Pretty darn fabulous? Incredible. Full of kisses.”

  “Yeah, all those things.” Her smile turned more natural. “And more, probably. I’d love to date you, Andrew, and see where this could lead.”

  “But?”

  She took a deep breath. “I’m going to offer you a deal. A negotiation. I’m holding our future kisses hostage, you might say.”

  And that sense of dread caught up to him and slammed up into his throat with a certainty. “You want me to work for Bob, don’t you?”

  She shook her head quickly as she took his other hand. “I want you
to interview. Just interview, Andrew,” she said quietly, squeezing both his hands and peering up at him. “Come for an interview with Bob, come sit down and listen to his offer, and…”

  “And you’ll date me,” he said dully.

  She nodded.

  And God help him, but he knew what the answer should be.

  He’d known in the restaurant, when she’d first suggested it: a big fat no.

  But now? Now he’d tasted her, had felt the possibility of forever in her arms?

  Now the answer wasn’t so simple. Now he knew he owed it to himself—to his past, his present, and his future—to explore this. Maybe they wouldn’t have the happily ever after he’d been looking for since he’d started dating. Maybe they’d get a few more dates—and kisses—into this relationship and discover they weren’t suited. Maybe they’d break up messily, or amicably, or maybe they wouldn’t break up at all.

  The point was, now that he’d felt that spark between them, there was no way he could turn his back on it. He had to see it through to the end, good or bad.

  “You’re a hard negotiator, Rachel Chakrabarti.”

  She nodded solemnly. “I intend to one day run my own hotel.”

  “You’re getting good practice,” he said a little bitterly.

  She was holding this above his head to get what she wanted, and he knew he’d give in.

  Taking a deep breath, he stared into her eyes. “Okay. I’ll do it.”

  The little noise she made wasn’t triumphant as he’d expected, but a little sad. She wrapped her arms around his middle and pressed herself against him in a hug. As his arms crept around her, he realized he could feel her heartbeat again. Somehow, this hug was more intimate and alarming than their earlier kiss.

  He loved it.

  Closing his eyes, Andrew tilted his head back, welcoming the harsh night air on his skin. What had he done?

  CHAPTER FIVE

  Monday morning, Rachel waited by the front desk, making small talk with Tim, the guy on duty. Truthfully, her heart wasn’t in it—neither was her attention. She was keeping an eye on the front door, wondering what would happen when Andrew stepped through it for his interview.

  What would he say?

  What would she feel?

  She’d manipulated him, plain and simple, but she wasn’t sure if she regretted it. She’d done it for a good cause, and although she didn’t understand the reason Andrew had stayed away all these years, it wasn’t going to get better unless someone prodded him.

  They’d spoken over the phone yesterday afternoon, and the conversation had been stilted and awkward. Not at all like their previous conversations, and it had been rough. Afterwards, Rachel had called Bob to let him know he had an interview this morning. He hadn’t been surprised she was at work—she often worked Sundays so there was a manager on duty—but he had gone strangely silent when she’d told him who the interview was with. He’d thanked her and hung up, sounding preoccupied.

  Yesterday evening, she’d texted Brooke Quinn. The woman was technically her doctor, but they’d become friends, and Rachel needed some answers. Unfortunately, when Brooke called, she didn’t have many.

  “I can’t help you,” she’d said. “All I do know is that Andrew and Heather just sort of disappeared a few years back. I mean, they still talk to their parents and siblings—Alyssa’s got a son, and I’m sure Andrew knows Jer—but he quit coming to any extended family events before the kid was born.” On the other end of the phone, Brooke huffed. “You know how tight our family is, right? Holidays, parties, any kind of event, we use it as an excuse to get together. But not Andrew and Heather, and I know our grandparents aren’t too happy about that. We all miss them.”

  That seemed to be all anyone knew. Andrew had quit associating with the family some years ago, and there was no explanation. But there had to be.

  She knew Andrew well enough to know he didn’t make random decisions; he thought through everything and made logical choices. So why didn’t he want to be around his family? Why didn’t he want to work with this uncle?

  Closing her eyes, Rachel breathed a little prayer she’d done the right thing. They needed an engineer. Bob and his family needed a chance to reconnect with Andrew. And she…she needed a chance to see where this relationship with Andrew would go.

  She hoped she hadn’t just screwed up her chances at all of those things. By making this deal with him, by ensuring Bob would have a chance with Andrew, had she doomed her chances at a further relationship with him? Oh, per the agreement, they’d be able to date—to kiss! But had she betrayed whatever trust Andrew might’ve found in her?

  She groaned under her breath and bit her lip hard.

  Face it, you’ve screwed everything up again, dork.

  No, no. She took a deep breath and decided she needed a more supportive subconscious.

  She opened her eyes just in time to see Andrew step through the front door. He hesitated, and she was moving before she knew what she intended to do. All she knew was she had to offer him whatever support and comfort she could.

  He’d stepped into the lobby by the time she reached him, and without thinking, she took his hand. He squeezed it tighter than she’d expected, but his expression was carefully blank. Whatever he was feeling, being here in his uncle’s hotel, he was hiding it from her. Maybe even from himself.

  “I’m glad you’re here, Andrew,” she said quietly.

  A flash of something in his green eyes told her he wasn’t happy to be here, but he didn’t say anything. Instead, he tugged on her hand once, and when she stumbled closer to him, he wrapped his arms around her and buried his face in her hair. And Lord help her, but she snaked her arms around his middle and wished she was kissing him. But judging from the way he was breathing—deep, carefully controlled, I-can-do-this-thing breaths—he needed a hug more than anything else right now.

  And whereas on Friday, holding Andrew had been full of promise, today she only felt his…well, desperation might be the right word.

  It was over too quickly, and when he pulled back and she stared up at him—both breathing hard, one thought ran through her head:

  What have I done?

  She’d forced this, and she was no longer sure it was the right move.

  She had to make things right. “Are you sure—”

  “Where’s my uncle’s office?” he asked in a hard voice.

  Ah.

  So he was willing to go through with the interview.

  “This way,” she said quietly, and tugged him towards the back hall.

  She passed the front desk clerk without meeting his eyes, knowing she’d just made a spectacle of herself.

  You’re going to start rumors about the AGM embracing strange men in the lobby.

  Andrew wasn’t strange; he was the boss’s nephew.

  Suddenly, Rachel really, really hoped they wouldn’t run into Roxane or another of Andrew’s cousins.

  “So…” Once they were in the back hall, she cleared her throat and began again. “How was Sophie’s game?”

  During their attempt at small talk yesterday, Andrew had told her about his niece’s hockey career. Today, his response was decidedly less enthusiastic.

  “Fine. She scored,” he said in a monotone. “I told her she could get a scholarship with an arm like that.”

  “Um…yeah,” she agreed in a small voice. This was so awkward!

  Stupid, stupid.

  As they approached the big door at the end of the hall, Rachel paused, realizing she was nervous as all get out. Beside her, Andrew took a deep breath and released her hand.

  Why?

  Did he not want Bob to see them holding hands? Or did he just want to adjust his tie with both hands?

  She knocked, and from inside, Bob’s voice sounded a little strained when he called “Come in.”

  And once they were inside, and he’d stood up behind his desk, his expression told her he was just as nervous.

  Why?

  Did he really
know why Andrew had stayed away all this time? Or was he nervous about finding out?

  “Andrew, my boy,” he said with obviously forced cheerfulness. “It’s wonderful to see you!” He held his hand out, the way he would at the beginning of any interview.

  But unlike any other interviewee, Andrew just looked at the hand as he approached the desk. And once there, he sank down into one of the chairs opposite Bob, still staring at the hand his uncle was offering with a blank expression.

  When it became clear he wasn’t going to shake his hand, Bob did his best to play it off. He forced a chuckle and ran his hand through his hair, as if that had been his intention all along.

  “Well, Andrew, I hope you don’t mind I’ve asked Rachel to sit in on the interview. Even though you wouldn’t be working for her directly, I think she has some valuable insights into running this hotel. I couldn’t manage it without her, far too stressful.”

  Slowly, Andrew turned to meet her eyes, and she winced at how hard his were. “I would’ve insisted on it,” he said blandly.

  “Ah. Right.” Bob shuffled a few of the ubiquitous papers on his desk. “So, let’s get started, shall we?”

  He launched into an explanation of what they were looking for, explaining how their chief had left unexpectedly, and how none of the remaining engineers were suitable for the job. He covered the breadth and scope of the hotel, and it was impossible not to hear his pride as he spoke about all the improvements and expansions.

  Rachel did her best to focus on her boss’s words, but she couldn’t help watching Andrew. His hands had clenched into fists on his knees, although she doubted Bob could see it on his side of the desk. And through his carefully trimmed beard, Andrew looked…pale. Sick, almost. Bob didn’t seem to notice.

  “Now, Andrew, I know you’re used to a place like River’s End Ranch, where there’s a million responsibilities and no end to the work. We’re a smaller operation here, but it’s perfect for Quinn Valley. We have more guest rooms, as I understand it, but fewer headaches!” He laughed at his own joke, then barreled on, “While you’ve got all the bells and whistles over there in Riston, we’re limited to just a company fleet—of four-wheelers!—and the water park.”