Savage

by Tiana Laveen

  “They waited until her friends vacated the property,” Austin stated dryly, as if the entire conversation was a waste of his time.

  “You want a cookie?! SO WHAT! They weren’t even down the street before your guys were pounding on her door in full gear! These interviews are supposed to be just that—interviews, not arrests! She’s a fuckin’ relationship podcast guru, not a saboteur! The only thing she is out here killing is a runway during her annual domestic violence fashion show fundraiser!”

  “You were on assignment and it was protocol, Savage.”

  “Protocol or not, you shoulda said somethin’, man! Damn! Is that too much to ask? We’re better than this!” Savage jammed his finger into his chest, feeling some kind of way.

  “Look, I understand why you’re upset but I am not supposed to tip you off. She could have become a flight risk.”

  “Where would she go, Austin?!” He tossed up his hands in disbelief. “We are everywhere! She can’t go to the police. They’d report back to us. She can’t go to the governor, send Gavin Newsom an email. She can’t go to anyone. She can go nowhere because we’d always find out. Besides, she’s innocent.”

  “Not anymore. She’s seen far too much and unlike your other conquests, you’re keeping her around, like a pet. You also told her too much. We had to come in and address this. You left us no choice.”

  “I blew away two people in front of ’er! What the fuck was I supposed to tell her, Austin? ‘Oh, Zaire, that was pretend. Hee hee hee, so funny! See, the red shit is ketchup, not real blood. We like to play like that.’ Do you see how stupid that sounds? She’s not a fuckin’ moron! Two dudes got smoked right then and there and she was about to piss her pants. Do you remember your first kill? Do you remember seeing your first dead body?” Silence, only breathing. “You told me you got sick… threw up. I don’t have that trigger. I don’t get queasy, I don’t get scared, I don’t get sick. Never had it, never will; as Harlem jokes, I was born broken. But I can imagine how you must’ve felt that time. Now, it’s old news to you.

  “You don’t bat an eye at bloated bodies floating in the river, putrefied gangsters in trashcans, the stench of decomposition, dismembered escape high-risk felons, guys with their guts pulled out yet their hearts are still beating. None of that phases you. You’ve seen it too many times now. Zaire, on the other hand is not in our world, okay? She will never be like us. Not everyone is built for this shit, and I like her even more because she’s not, man. It makes her human. She’s not in the street, she’s not around drugs, she’s not in our sphere. She still has a heart, unlike the rest of us sons of bitches who are completely desensitized and don’t give a fuck. She’s not a savage… Don’t confuse her with me. Don’t make her a monster, man. She’s not.”

  “I don’t believe she is at all. That’s not the issue and for the record, her interview went well so I have no reason to believe we’d need to address this again unless something else transpires in her presence. However, you understand the risks, Savage. All of our men have had things like this happen. It’s common. We have sex lives, I get that, but then you have unexpected visitors, too. Depending on the person and what transpires determines how we handle it.”

  “And you handled this wrong.”

  “Savage, you’re killin’ me, here.” Austin sounded exasperated. “No, we didn’t. That still doesn’t change the fact that we followed the rules.”

  “Well, here’s a Savage rule for you. Write this shit down. If one of your motherfuckers pops up over Zaire’s house again with no warning, no call to me, no text, not letting me know what’s up, I am going to blow his fuckin’ head off. No hesitation.”

  “Savage…”

  “No… No! I mean this! Since you want to talk to me like everything I say is an over-reaction and this situation should be swept under the rug and you did no wrong, then we’ll be finished talkin’, all right? And I’ll just handle it hands on. You just make sure you have that same energy when I protect what’s mine, okay?! Try me! Not much into conversing anymore about it. All I know is one thing, and one thing only: You better leave her out of this, you hear me? If you need to speak to her, you speak to me first. You got what you needed. Don’t ever do that shit again without giving me a heads up.”

  “I can’t promise you we’ll never have to speak to her again, especially since, according to the interview, you two are seeing one another. You should know me well enough by now to understand that I would have alerted you regardless had I known it was scheduled while you were in South Dakota, Savage! You’re pissed at me for something that needed to transpire, regardless of how your dick feels about it! Get your head back in the game… the big one.”

  “I believe I’ve made myself clear.” He took a puff of his cigar and hung his arm out the window. “Now, if you’re feelin’ froggy, motherfucker, then jump. Do that shit again, then you just make sure it’s worth it to ya. If you cross that line, you should never call me again. For shit. I won’t be at your son’s graduation, no more parties, no more nothing. I definitely won’t be taking any more assignments from you. You’ll be dead to me. It’ll be like you never existed. There are plenty of agencies who want me should I feel so inclined to stop my solo act. They’ll ask me about Austin, and I’ll say, ‘Austin who? I don’t know that motherfucker.’ I mean that.”

  Tense silence stretched between them for a few moments.

  “How in the hell did we get here? How did this happen, Savage? You and I don’t argue! We get along great. A woman has come between us. Why am I surprised?” He chuckled. “Anyway, I have to admit I find it interesting that this is so serious… you know, between you two. You never told me she was your girlfriend. When did this happen, if you don’t mind me asking?”

  “When was my private life any of your business? Besides, the answer is in the interview. She was grilled—even had to tell them how many times we had sex. Unbelievable.”

  “It is my business if you’d like me to lay off and tell the others to step back. Look, I know how you are. We’ve known each other for a mighty long time, Savage, and not only are you one of the best; I consider you a friend. This disagreement is disheartening to say the least.”

  It truly was. Savage enjoyed Austin as a person, but things had happened, lines had been crossed, and now he was cross, too.

  “If you think I’m enjoying this shit, I’m not. There are just some things I won’t stand for, Austin. From anyone.”

  “I know you don’t trust many people, Savage, and you don’t discuss your life unless it pertains to the job, but in the line of work we’re in, we just don’t… have successful relationships, okay? It can get messy…” Savage leaned his head against the back of the seat. He stared up at the roof of the car, feeling a million things, thinking a billion thoughts as Prince serenaded him. “But I’m not going to try to deter you. I know that this must be pretty important… she must be pretty important for you to proceed forward. Now, back to the original discussion. Do you want the added security or not? You can’t be in five places at once, Savage.”

  After a rolling it over in his mind, he came to a decision.

  “Yeah… But I don’t want her privacy invaded, okay? No cameras in her bathroom, nothin’ like that. Don’t enter her house without knocking, no recorders. Just drive-bys and check-ins. She’s got… never mind.”

  “No, what? She’s got what?”

  Savage sighed, not certain he should say anything just yet. “She’s got some fuckin’ looney toon callin’ her show, emailing her and harassing her.”

  “Looney toon? What’s going on?”

  “Yeah, a fuckin’ nutjob.” He ran his hand down his face. “Some cracked in the head asshole is pissed that she told his wife to love herself again, basically, and leave his ass. See, Zaire is like this women’s empowerment expert, Austin. She gives tough love. It’s entertainment but a lot of her advice is on the money. It’s part show, part truth. She acts overly dramatic and shit to keep the ratings high. People like drama, goes
with the territory, but she still has integrity. She tells them what she believes to be true, and gives good advice, ya know?”

  “Yeah, so what happened?” He could almost hear the man’s brain churning—a leverage tool to get him to do his bidding. Austin was always trying to run deals and trades. This time would be no different.

  “So, the wife, her caller, eventually did kick this guy to the curb and has a whole new life now. New boyfriend and shit and this guy blames Zaire for it all. This has been going on for over a year, but he’s getting more manic. The wife has a restraining order against him and moved across the country with their kids. Zaire said he stopped callin’ for a long time but the other day I was listening to her show and heard him call in. He said some pretty foul shit.”

  “Is Zaire concerned now?”

  “Actually, she didn’t bring it up to me at all about this latest incident, but I’m not surprised. She and I have spent a lot of time together and she’s pretty much caught on that I don’t like shit like this, that I could do something. I haven’t told her I’d heard the call, but I don’t like this shit. I don’t like it at all.”

  “Okay, we need to do something about this. These issues rarely just go away on their own, you know? I want to help.”

  “Sure you do… and then you have me in the palm of your hand again, out there chasin’ another bad guy while you sit back from the comfort of your office and watch.”

  “Savage, Jesus! Get the stick out of your ass and just talk to me! We have a good relationship. If you’re angry about something else, something you haven’t relayed, just say so!”

  “STAY AWAY FROM HER!” he yelled so loud, his own ear rang. “You kept talking about rules, but I can’t let this go! I need to hear your promise. You keep those motherfuckers away from my girlfriend, Austin! You’ve caused disruption! I am trying to gain her fuckin’ trust, and then as soon as I turn my back, the A-Team crashes into her fuckin’ house! She didn’t want to talk to me about it and had to get herself calmed down. You’re fucking with my life!”

  “You’re relentless, Savage! You’re like a dog with a bone. I cannot believe we’re back on this shit again!”

  “Because it’s not resolved!”

  “I told you that you weren’t home and I damn sure wasn’t about to call you during a sting! You were apprehending the suspect!”

  “You’ve given me a million reasons why you did this, and none make sense. First, I wasn’t around. Then it was you would’ve told me anyway, but I was working. Then it was, you can’t tell me because it would compromise the interview process and that would make us all subject to an interrogation. Next you’ll say it’s because she planned to go to Disneyland and give Minnie Mouse a hug! Fuckin’ clown behavior…”

  “We’re going to settle this once and for all. We had to do it right then, Savage. You know how these schedules work!” He looked at himself in the rear view mirror. His nostrils flared as he shook his head in disbelief. His heart was beating nearly out of his damn chest.

  The fear he’d felt when she’d called him and told him what had happened… and then she wouldn’t answer her phone when he’d called her back. When they did speak again, he could tell she was beyond concerned. How could he have this woman all to himself if he couldn’t even build a foundation for her to stand on? He needed time to do that… but so much had happened.

  “Austin…” He hated how his voice cracked. “I can’t risk her runnin’ off because she’s afraid of what I do, or of me! The first time, in Vegas, it took me hours to calm her down, to make her understand. This is the second time some fucked up shit has happened around her because of her involvement with yours truly, under her own roof, the one place she is supposed to feel safe. If you mess this up for me… I FUCKIN’ SWEAR!” He beat the armrest and rocked about in his seat, seeing red. “She didn’t sign up for this. Don’t do this shit again. Promise me, Austin! If our friendship means that much to you, if you really honor our professional affiliation even a little, promise me that if you ever need to speak to her again, before you send them in like stormtroopers, you will tell me first.”

  “Savage, I can’t just—”

  “PROMISE ME!” He hit the steering wheel.

  “I promise.” They both drew quiet for a spell. “Now, back to what we were saying. We can put a tracer on her show phone, the one she uses for her podcast. Would that be okay?” Savage blew out puffs of smoke and looked about his garage. Everything was where it should be, put in its special place. Sometimes he came out there just to think, tinker around with one of his bikes, or sit back and listen to music.

  “I already did…”

  “Oh. Does she know?”

  “Nope. She’d tell me I was over-reacting probably, overstepping my bounds.” He shrugged. “But I do want some of your equipment. I’ll rig it myself. What do you want in return? Let’s get to the part where you start askin’ for extra shit, like an extra hit for half the price.”

  Austin laughed on the other end.

  “Believe it or not, Savage, I just want you to continue to keep working some of these assignments for me. I’m honest enough to say some things just need a special touch, and only you can deliver it. So, until I find someone as good as or better than you, you are the one that comes to mind when I need assurance that one of the more challenging jobs that I come across will be done correctly. We can’t have any mishaps right now. The FBI is down our throat.” After a pause, he added, “I’ve never had the threat of losing you before.”

  Savage sniffed, feeling a bit of a cold coming on, then took another puff of his cigar.

  “You won’t. All of this comes with the territory. I can’t stop doing this; it’s who I am. I haven’t stayed single this long just because I’m a commitment-phobe. I mean, yeah, that played a part in it, but I had never met anyone to even make me consider settling down. She’s… she’s different.”

  “I know it hasn’t been long, but with your irritation over the interrogation schedule and what happened in Vegas, do you believe you love her?”

  Savage took a deep breath and turned off the music.

  “Maybe… Hell, I might… time will tell. I don’t know what that’s supposed to feel like, really, Austin. I’ve never loved anyone before.” He shrugged. “I mean, I love my mother and my father. I love a couple of my friends, wouldn’t want anything bad to happen to ’em, but that romantic love? Nah, I have no fuckin’ clue. It seems a little silly to me. Well, it at least it did.”

  “Doesn’t seem so silly now, huh?” Austin laughed forlornly.

  “Nah, it doesn’t. I was blindsided. This wasn’t supposed to happen, ya know? But it did. It’s never funny when it’s happening directly to you, is it?” He smiled sadly as the realization set in.

  “Savage, I’m struggling here.”

  “With what?”

  “My own self-interests versus what I know is right.” Austin cleared his throat. “I have been in love many times. I’m a bit older than you, so I’ve seen a bit more shit. One woman though, she was the one that got away… the one I think about to this day. I should have never let her go.” Austin’s breathing became louder. “She understood our line of work. She was a cop, so she wasn’t surprised that organizations like ours existed. But what did I go and do? I imploded it. I made excuses, Savage. I was afraid I would put her in the line of danger. I was also afraid of being saddled down. I mean, if we’re really honest, we’re around beautiful women all the time. We travel the country, sometimes the world. We’re high on adrenaline, no one can touch us… It’s a dangerous life. An exciting life. A fucked up life.” Savage nodded and sighed. The man was right. “I already had a young son at the time from my brief relationship with Meredith. Anyway, I lost her, Savage. She got tired of waiting. She married someone else.

  “This happened over fifteen years ago. Now, she’s got two kids. The oldest is like, thirteen, I believe. I ran into her the other day, and all of those feelings rushed back. She looked even more beautiful. But
I was too late. She gave me a kiss on the cheek, told me she was happy, and wished me well. I’ll never be well though, Savage… because I let my work come before my heart. If you can find a balance, do it. If you’re ready to try to commit, go ahead with it. It’s not going to be easy. If Zaire’s easily offended, squeamish, has a big mouth, any of that, your goose is cooked. Cut her loose. But if she can hang with you, Savage, if she can learn and listen, if she has true interest in you as a man and not just the fact that you’re a legal killing machine, she can be, as the young kids say, ‘your ride or die.’ So you should fight for that. I mean it.”

  Savage hung his head, feeling the man’s words deep in his soul. “I hear you, Austin…”

  “We all need love. I don’t, uh, I don’t think we’re supposed to be in this world alone…”

  Inside, Savage felt like a time bomb. He refused to confess everything that was on his mind and in his heart. Zaire had become such an intricate part of his life that he allowed her to see bits and pieces of him he’d kept under lock and key for years. The sex was becoming more intense. The words they shared were serious. The time they spent together meant everything to him. When they weren’t together, he was thinking about her, and when he was working, he couldn’t wait to finish the shit up and get back to her. His first love had always been his gun and the intended target. Now, his bloodthirst had competition.

  “I want her, Austin. I’ll do almost anything to keep this going with her. It feels so good. She makes me feel like I’ve never felt before. That’s all I want to say about it. Maybe that was even too much.”

  “You’ve confirmed my suspicions. You’re in love. It’s too late. That’s why you became so angry with me. I get it now. Look, you have my blessing—not that you asked for it, but you have it all the same. Now, get your ass over here as soon as possible for your next assignment. Pick up that equipment tomorrow for your little project. I’ll have it waiting for you.” The call ended abruptly.

  Savage placed the phone in his lap, then turned the music back up. Prince belted out, ‘Why You Want to Treat Me So Bad?’