Weightless

by Gia Riley

  Her sweet laughter fills the room. “Let’s save all that for when you get here. If you let me know when you’re close to the apartment, I’ll be waiting for you just like this. Okay?”

  “That’s more than okay.”

  “Good,” she giggles while I practically blow from the thought of finding her in bed completely ready for me. I can’t think of a better welcome than that.

  From there the conversation flows effortlessly as the minutes turn into hours. Before Sophie I was never a phone kind of guy, but now, I could stay awake the entire night and never get tired of listening to her voice.

  Two more days and the good-bye’s end.

  MORNING COMES ENTIRELY TOO FAST. The beeping of my alarm clock makes me want to toss it through the window. I had a restless night trying to figure out how to ask Sophie to be my wife. I’ve gone over what I want to say to her, but the proposal itself has to have meaning. I can’t picture myself getting down on one knee in the middle of a fancy restaurant with a crowd of strangers watching. Sophie isn’t an over the top kind of girl, so I want to keep it simple yet make it memorable.

  Before I can even think about putting a plan into action, I have a wrestling clinic to coach. I remember when I was in high school, and what a big deal it was to be paired up against a guy who had the potential to knock you out of the starting line-up. With all the coaches eyeing the best match-ups to form the strongest team possible, I would do anything I could to stand out. It took a while to get noticed as a new guy on the team, but when they finally realized how invested I was, they took my talent to a new level.

  Today, a bunch of other kids are going to realize their full potential and get noticed for the first time just like I was. Wrestling has always been more to me than an extracurricular activity. Whether it was the importance of sportsmanship, how to lose with dignity, or how to be a real man, each year I learned a valuable life lesson.

  The program transformed me from a shy kid with his head in the clouds to one with a dream to wrestle in college—to someday be a coach. Now it’s my time to make a difference—one kid at a time. Before that can happen, I need to roll my tired ass out of bed for a shower.

  “Kipton, are you up?” Dad asks as he knocks on my bedroom door.

  “Yeah. I’m up.” Barely. That’s what I get for staying up most of the night with Sophie. Not that I regret it.

  After a hot shower, I feel ten times better. The aroma of frying bacon only adds to my good mood. Of course mom is in the kitchen in front of the stove cooking enough bacon to feed the entire block.

  “Dad leave already?”

  “Yeah, he was itching to get to the lake. All those fish to catch.”

  I usually go with him, but this year, I had to miss out on the trip. “You kill a pig or something, Ma?”

  “Oh hunny, no. I’m taking advantage of every morning I get with you. Soon you’ll be in your own house again. I’ve got you back for a little while, and I intend to feed you as much as you’ll let me.”

  I grab a slice of crispy bacon from the plate on the counter, kissing moms cheek as I pass by. “You can feed me anytime. Plus Sophie and I will be living in town. We can have family dinners and all that shit.”

  She laughs and at first I think she’s just wiping some bacon grease from her cheek, but when she reaches for a paper towel, I see she’s crying again.

  I walk over to the stove, and take her glasses off her face. “Don’t cry, Mom. This is a good thing. Think about how much cheaper your grocery bill will be,” I tell her as I stuff another slice of bacon in my mouth. So good.

  She laughs, but the water works don’t stop like I was hoping they would. “I’m happy for you, Kipton. These aren’t all sad tears. Maybe I don’t tell you enough, but you’ve made me so proud.”

  I wasn’t expecting a love fest over breakfast, but the news of asking Sophie to marry me must have hit her twice as hard as it hit me. Change is hard for her—nothing makes her happier than having a house full of people to take care of.

  “We won’t be far. Anytime you want to get together, you let us know.”

  “Oh, you’ll get sick of me, Kipton. I don’t want to overstep.”

  “You won’t overstep. Sophie needs a mother to do all the girlie shit with anyway. Especially once we start planning the wedding.”

  I watch as she dishes the last few pieces of bacon onto the plate. Once she finishes she turns to face me. “And you’re positive this is where Sophie wants to be?”

  “Why wouldn’t she want to live here? It’s not that far away from her dad.”

  “What about her mom, Kipton? They aren’t in a good place, I know, but Montgomery is eight hours away from Ashland. You won’t be able to pick up and drive there anytime you want. It will take planning plus days off work.”

  “I know. She already said she doesn’t ever want to live in Ashland again though. She has too many bad memories there.”

  “I don’t think it would be a good idea for her to live there either, but what if she decides she wants to live somewhere else entirely? Don’t you think she should have the option?”

  “What do you mean? Like Florida? That’s not going to happen.”

  “I mean anywhere. You haven’t considered the possibility have you?”

  “No, because I know she wants us to be together. We already talked about my job before I accepted. It’s nothing new.”

  Mom shakes her head, but now that she’s bringing this shit up, I wonder if she knows something I don’t. “What are you getting at?” I had her support last night. What could have changed overnight to make her doubt my plans?

  “Nothing, Kipton. I’m just reminding you that you have to talk to Sophie before you make all these decisions for the future. Asking her to marry you is one thing—make sure you’re on the same page before you go assuming. Women like to be heard. I think that’s something incredibly important to her given her childhood.”

  Mom sets a plate of egg whites in front of me with cut up fruit on the side. The sight of it makes my mouth water. I dig in, pausing once the fork reaches my mouth. “Do you think I’m doing the wrong thing?”

  “No, honey. She’s a wonderful choice for a wife.”

  “Then I want your opinion on the old Dunlap place.”

  Mom eyes me over her shoulder as she washes the breakfast dishes. “It’s a beautiful house. I used to play with Mr. Dunlap’s daughter when I was a kid. There are a lot of wonderful memories on that property.”

  I was hoping she liked it. She’s mentioned playing there before, and it was the first place I thought of when I started looking for houses. “I was thinking of buying it.”

  She turns the water off before drying her hands on the kitchen towel draped over her shoulder. “It needs a lot of work, Kipton. That’s a project home.”

  She’s right. It hasn’t been occupied since old man Dunlap moved away to a retirement community. It was too much for a man in his late eighties to keep up with. That doesn’t mean someone my age couldn’t completely restore it to its original value.

  “I know it’s kind of a mess right now, but I think we could really make it our own. Sophie would get to decorate however she wanted. And after we get it how we want it, it would be a place we could spend our entire lives.”

  Not to mention the yard is huge and the property has an oak tree big enough to hold a treehouse. The thought of what I could do to Sophie up there is enough of an incentive to make an offer.

  “You’ve put a lot of thought into all of this haven’t you?”

  It’s all I’ve been thinking about since I graduated. “I have. Sophie’s never had a real home, and that’s what I want for her. A place she can be excited about going home to every day.” Mom smiles warmly, my answer obviously a good one. I’m not blowing smoke either. I mean every single word I tell her.

  “Finish up, you’re going to be late.”

  Between dad waking me up and her cooking me breakfast, I feel like I’m ten again being ushered off to school
. But I do as I’m told, finishing my breakfast five minutes later.

  Although a positive conversation, the small bit of doubt mom had about Sophie is enough to make me second guess my choices. I already assumed Sophie said yes to marriage when I gave her the infinity ring. While it wasn’t an official engagement or anything, I gave the ring to her with the promise that I’d ask her be my wife when the time was right. As far as I’m concerned, the time has come. I’m done waiting to start my life with her.

  I YELL OUT INSTRUCTIONS TO the boys on the mat. I’ve been distracted during the first few hours of the clinic, running on pure adrenaline.

  The guys are rowdy today, eager to learn as much as they can as we work through wrestle offs for roster spots. While they’re focused on the prize, I’m making stupid mistakes, almost throwing my own back out while demonstrating a hold. Wrestling on the mat is the last place I should be distracted. I don’t know how many times I’ve told the kids to keep their head in the game and now I’m guilty of the very same thing—daydreaming. As I just learned, the match can flip flop in a split second, taking you from the top to flat on your back.

  Each pairing is intense now that the guys know what’s at stake. As we challenge through the last match, a new line-up forms. With a clear cut division between varsity and junior varsity, new rivalries have been born. I’ve been on the JV roster, desperately wanting another shot at my competition so I could have my time in the spotlight during a Friday night match. So I know without a doubt half of the guys in this room are pumped, while the other half are left wishing for a second chance. In time, they’ll get it.

  It’s a challenging system, one that might be hard on some and too easy on others, but it’s effective to get the most out of each guy. You can only stay on top if you keep winning. Adversity makes the weak stronger and the stronger even tougher. Much like a tournament is run, you still have to win to advance.

  “Let’s break for water,” I tell my group. The others have already finished. I take a seat on the mat next to Troy, chugging my sports drink. His interest in our program has only increased since he became the head trainer. I haven’t heard him mention Alisa once today, and the last thing I plan on doing is asking about her. That’s one mess I don’t ever want to be in the middle of.

  “Your back okay, Kipton?”

  I didn’t realize he saw my shitty attempt at a reversal. “Yeah. I wasn’t focused, but I’m cool. Thanks for asking.”

  “No problem.”

  An awkward silence passes between the two of us. Troy’s a nice guy, but knowing he’s screwing Alisa makes conversation with him nearly impossible. Part of me wants to warn him against her, but the other hopes they can figure their shit out.

  Coach finishes up his speech to the team, and dismisses us early for the picnic lunch outside. As the kids all grab their gear and head to the showers, I pull Coach aside, filling him in on my news for Wednesday. I’ve already decided to take a personal day from teaching, so I won’t be around for practice either. I feel guilty about skipping out on my responsibilities, but he takes the news in stride, telling me not to worry about it.

  He’s aware of what has been going on. Most of the staff already knew about Sophie’s attack before I even got back home. With a town this small, it became the talk of the town in no time. They’ll only ever be able to speculate about the details, but I couldn’t keep the rest of what happened private no matter how hard I tried. Front page news at the university is also front page news in Montgomery.

  With that weight off my shoulders, I take a quick shower in the locker room before joining the rest of the team outside. Most of the team sits at the picnic tables, already stuffing their faces full of fried chicken.

  I take my place in the line, filling my own plate with chicken, and a little of everything else. By the time I make it to the end of the table, I run right into Alisa. I guess that means she’s back with Troy.

  “Hi, Kip.”

  I lean down to grab a drink out of the cooler. “Hey.”

  “I heard about Sophie. I hope she’s okay.”

  “She’s doing better.” I knew it was only a matter of time before someone mentioned Sophie today. It makes me feel guilty for enjoying a picnic while she’s at home recuperating. But that’s all the more reason why I need to bring her home for good.

  I assume Alisa is going to wait for Troy, but she takes her plate and follows me to a shady spot underneath the tree. “You sure this is a good idea?” I question.

  She sits down in the grass across from me despite my words of caution. “There’s nothing wrong with two friends eating lunch together is there?”

  “Normally, no. But you and I used to be a lot more than friends and they all know it. People talk.”

  She shrugs her shoulders dismissively. “Then let them talk. I’m eating.”

  That’s easy for her to say when she doesn’t have anything on the line. It would be easy to pick a fight with her like old times, but I focus on my chicken, instead of arguing. I’ve done more than my fair share of that with her over the years. “So, you’re with Troy again?”

  She takes another bite before shifting her gaze to the ground. “It’s complicated.”

  “It always is with you.” She slides her feet back into her flip flops like she’s ready to make a run for it. I’m a dick. “Sit, Alisa. I shouldn’t have said that.”

  “I deserved it.” She sets her fork down on her plate before continuing. “Kipton, I know I threw away the best thing that ever happened to me. I’ll always regret the choices I made while we were in college. Ever since I screwed it all up I haven’t been able to find anyone to treat me the way you did.”

  I swallow my mouthful of food before asking, “Does Troy treat you like shit?” I’ll set him straight if he’s being an asshole to her. We may not be together, but a woman deserves to be respected by a man.

  “No, he’s been great,” she assures, despite being coy about their relationship. The Alisa I dated wasn’t a shy girl. She would tell you like it was whether you wanted to hear it or not.

  “Help me out then. What’s the problem?”

  She pauses, her eyes set on the crowd of people standing nearby instead of me. “He’s not you.”

  “Alisa,” I sigh. “We’ve been over this.” Taking her back was never something I was comfortable with. I was able to forgive her for cheating, but I’d never be able to love her the way I did before it happened. Anything good we had she ruined.

  “I know you have Sophie, but I guess I’m afraid to go too far with Troy in case there’s another chance for us. Maybe that makes me sounds pathetic, but I can’t help the way I feel.”

  “Is that why you said it’s complicated?”

  “Yes. We were having the rough patch I mentioned before because he said I’m still hung up on you.”

  “You are,” I say matter of factly.

  “I know. I’m not sure how to wipe out an entire chapter of my life like it didn’t exist. I’ve always loved you, and now that I don’t have you, I miss you.”

  “You took what we had for granted, Alisa.” College changed her. It changed us.

  “I know I did, and I have to live with my poor choices for the rest of my life. I can’t stop thinking about you. Even when I’m with Troy, I compare him to you.”

  “You can’t do that if you want to be happy.”

  “I don’t know how to be happy anymore. The guys I found at school were nothing like you. They didn’t care if I stayed or if I left as long as they got some. And I let them use me because I was desperate to feel connected to someone the way we used to be.”

  I get what she’s saying because I felt the same way after we broke up—I would drown myself in girls looking for something I thought could never exist. Until I met Sophie in her damn pink towel.

  “Alisa, if Troy is good to you, you have to figure out if you want him or not. You and I had our chance.”

  “And we won’t get another?” She asks solemnly.

 
I shake my head, “No.”

  “You honestly believe that? That you can never love me again? We were each other’s first, Kipton. That has to count for something.”

  It kills me to have to tell her this, but it’s the only way to make her see that I’ve moved on. Completely. She needs to live her life and give Troy a real shot. I know she’ll never make any progress if she is still holding onto the idea of getting back together with me. “I’m going to ask Sophie to marry me, Alisa.”

  She drops her fork in the grass as she sits in shock. I shouldn’t have told her. Ducking her head, she tries to mask her defeated expression behind the curtain of hair draped over her shoulder. I’ve seen her cry many times, and she’s only a few seconds away from tears. “Alisa.”

  She surprises me when she sits up a little straighter, brushing her hair out of the way. But her smile is as fake as they come. She’s trying too hard for any of this to be genuine. “Congratulations. I’m happy for you.” She tries hard to keep her smile in place, but it disappears as soon as the words leave her mouth. She’s devastated.

  “Thanks.” I drop the subject, not wanting to rub salt in her wounds. I made my point.

  Out of the corner of my eye, I spot Troy watching the two of us. I can only imagine what he’s thinking seeing us sitting under this damn tree like we’re having a private picnic. When he makes eye contact with me, I nod my head, telling him to come join us.

  Alisa smiles when she sees him. “Sit,” she says as she pats the ground beside her. She’s trying too hard to pretend she’s okay with my news. But Troy sits as instructed.

  “Things looked intense over here. Is everything okay?” He leans closer to her, picking up her hand and setting it on his leg. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out he’s into her from his protective body language. It’s the same way I am with Sophie.

  “Kipton was telling me,” she pauses directing her question to me. “Is it okay to tell him?”

  Troy glances back and forth between the two of us. He narrows his eyes, probably expecting some great announcement about the two of us. Not a chance of that happening.