Faking It (McCullough Mountain)

by Michaels, Lydia

  “What about us? Why won’t you look at me?”

  He turned and when he faced her she took a step back. His expression was cold, distant. “I resigned today.”

  “What?”

  “Turns out, the university’s policy is quite clear on student-teacher relationships.”

  “Someone found out?”

  “No, I asked.”

  “What? Why would you do that?”

  “Because I don’t like hiding. I thought about everything you’ve told me about your brother and Tristan. I thought about what my son said and I decided you deserve more than to be kept like some shameful secret.”

  Those were her words, but she didn’t want to hear that right now. If he left where would he go? Where would Wes go? This wasn’t how it was supposed to work. “I don’t mind being a secret if it means having you.” She was a hypocrite. Megan was right. She picked and chose her measuring stick, but it was never absolute. “Alec, tell them it’s a lie.”

  “It’s not a lie. I love you.”

  Her vision blurred and she blinked rapidly, refusing to cry. “Then don’t leave.”

  “I’ll find another job, Sheilagh.”

  “What about Wes?”

  “I’ll work it out. He can get loans and if he keeps up his grades there’s no reason for him to leave.”

  “What about us?”

  He smiled, but the expression was sad. “We’re free to be together. No one can stop us.”

  “But I’ll live here and you’ll be somewhere else.”

  “There are other schools not too far from here where I can apply.” He was already putting things in boxes.

  She stepped close and grabbed the books in his hand, tossing them to the desk. “Stop it!”

  With ever-present calm he said, “Sheilagh, what would you have me do? They’ll have a new philosophy instructor hired by the end of the month. My summer classes have been reassigned to someone else. There’s no reason not to keep moving.”

  A tear trickled down her cheek. “But I signed up for the summer session. Where will you live? What will happen to your house? It’s your home.”

  “Perhaps I’ll rent Wesley’s place or live with you for the summer.”

  “Stop being so damn calm! This is your livelihood, Alec.”

  He laughed and cupped her cheek. “It’s just a job, Sheilagh. You’re worth it.”

  Her lips pressed tight and she stepped back. “No, I’m not.”

  His expression hardened. “Stop. Do not stand there and act like you aren’t worth this. It’s a bloody job any professor could do. I’d give up all this and more if it meant having you. I have money and a good resume with an excellent track record. I’ll find another job at another college.”

  “I’ll follow you.”

  He shut his eyes. “No.”

  “Alec, I don’t want this.”

  His eyes turned wide and he stared at her. “Us?”

  “No, I want us. I don’t want you to lose your job. I don’t want you to move. You never should have said anything.”

  Smiling softly, he said, “Sheilagh, I do intend to marry you some day, but it’s too soon. Until we’re married, this is how it has to be. It’s the ethical thing to do.”

  “What would happen if we were married?”

  He frowned. “Nothing. But you’re too young—”

  “I’m not too young! Stop saying that. My sister was married and knocked up by the time she was twenty. What does marriage change?”

  He met her gaze and drew in a slow breath. “Everything,” he whispered. “You’d be mine. Forever.”

  “And what does it change about this situation?”

  He sighed. “If you were my wife no one could say a word. I would never be your professor again, for obvious reasons, but other than that you would have every right to be here as much as my son. You’d even get free tuition.”

  So what was the problem? There should be a problem, right? She turned and paced to his door. Normal people would see a problem with that, but she couldn’t seem to find one. She loved Alec. He loved her.

  She spun and faced him. “We’ll get married.”

  “No.”

  She sputtered. “What do you mean, no? Why not? It fixes everything.”

  Shaking his head, he approached her, running his hands down her arms. “Sheilagh, marriage is forever. I’m divorced from a very nice woman, but I’ve been through a marriage that didn’t last. I don’t want that for you.”

  “Who says we won’t last?”

  “Sweetheart, we met less than a year ago. Who knows what tomorrow will bring?”

  “Alec,” she said with forced patience. “Remember when you told me that loving someone meant telling them when they were being an idiot?”

  “That’s not what I said.”

  “Well, you’re being a fucking moron right now. If we got married you could keep your job. Wes could continue his education here and so could I. We could live together. No more sneaking around. Stop worrying about what might happen and let’s do something for us. Step out of the cave, professor.”

  He took a step back. “You’re rushing things.”

  “Rushing things? Everyone’s always telling me I’m too afraid of disappointing others to try. This is me trying. Now strap on a pair and let’s go get hitched.”

  He laughed. He obviously tried not to, but it slipped out anyway. “Sheilagh—”

  No more arguing. “If you leave, I’ll leave too. I’ll follow you to every college you go to. You chase me, I chase you. Stop running. I did it for years. It’s no fun.”

  The side of his mouth kicked up as he glanced at her, a strange look in his eyes. “What happened with Megan today? You’re different.”

  “I cried. You picked a terrible few hours to disappear. A lot’s happened. Luke and Tristan broke up.”

  He frowned. “You called Luke?”

  “No. I called Tristan.” He stiffened so she quickly went on. “Don’t you see? I don’t care about any of that. Right now all I care about is you. I can’t let you throw away a job you love on my account.”

  “I wouldn’t be throwing it away. I’d be making it possible for us to be together.”

  She rolled her eyes. Jeeze he was slow. “I get it, but I’m telling you that doesn’t have to happen. I want to marry you.”

  He was quiet for a long while. “What about children, Sheilagh?”

  “Do you want kids?” she snapped. “Why does that decision rest on my shoulders?”

  “Because I already have a son.”

  “Okay, so I get a step-son—who adores me—and we shelve that topic for now. I may someday want kids, but that day doesn’t have to be today.”

  “How long will you wait? I’m already forty.”

  “And Charlie Chaplin had kids into his seventies.”

  “What father wants to be in diapers at the same time as his son?”

  “Oh, my God. Knock it off! Fine! We’ll have kids now. As soon as I graduate. That gives you three years to reverse whatever you got going on down there and knock me up. You’ll be forty-three, a perfectly acceptable age to have children in this day and age. Does that work?”

  His smile was slow, but told her something she hadn’t known. Alec wanted more children. He caught her wrist and pulled her close, kissing her slowly. “Yes, that works. I’d like to try for a boy and a girl, but I don’t think I’d want more than three.”

  “I’ll give you two and raise you a third depending on who they take after. If they’re McCulloughs, two may be all you get.”

  He laughed and kissed her again. “Are you serious about all this?”

  “Serious as a monkey on a cupcake.”

  He drew back and frowned. “That doesn’t make sense.”

  “Try getting between that monkey and cupcake and you’ll disagree. That’s a serious situation. Now, let’s go get your job back.”

  Two birth certificates, one printed and signed marriage license, two witnesses, and seven
ty-two required hours later and they were on their way to Lambertville. Alec still seemed to be second-guessing their decision, but Sheilagh was whole-heartedly onboard.

  She’d given him the address to a place she knew of and the GPS directed them down a windy road along the Delaware River. She hoped she didn’t make a mistake in trusting the one relative she could always count on.

  Alec took her hand as he drove. “You’re fidgeting. Having second thoughts?”

  “No. I’m just worried we’re gonna get there and there will be a million McCulloughs waiting.”

  “We don’t have to do it this way. We could have a traditional wedding.”

  “No. I want to do it quick. Quick and painless.”

  He laughed. “Don’t romanticize it.”

  She smiled. He got her. At the end of the day that had to be worth everything. Her mum was a maniac, but Sheilagh’s father loved her. “You know my parents eloped.”

  “I believe you mentioned that a few times.”

  “My dad’s older than my mum by quite a bit of years. He was my Aunt Colleen’s friend. The first time he saw my mum he said he never looked at another woman the same. She was it.”

  “Do you think they’ll be angry?” he asked, his thumb rubbing softly over her knuckles.

  “I don’t know. My granddad shot my dad when they got home.”

  Alec laughed.

  “I’m serious. Right in the leg. He has a scar.”

  Alec glanced at her nervously.

  She smiled. “You’d take a bullet for me, right?”

  His grip on her hand tightened. “Perhaps we should call them.”

  “No.”

  “Why are you so adamant about this?”

  “Because I know them. They’ll swarm in and take over everything. Next thing you know, you’ll be thrown in a kilt, sucking back whiskey, and scared shitless.”

  “I don’t scare easily, Sheilagh. I’ve faced them once, I can face them again.”

  “Oh, you’ll be facing them every holiday and family reunion for the rest of your life. Let’s keep this moment for ourselves.”

  The GPS directed them over a bridge and through a historic town then informed them they’d arrived at their destination. “Does this look like the place?”

  Sheilagh unbuckled her seatbelt and looked at the property. As Alec slowly pulled into the driveway lined with pretty pink blooms she read the sign. Dougherty Bed & Breakfast.

  “This is it.” As he rounded the old colonial she spotted her brother’s car. “They’re here!”

  Alec shut off the engine and she climbed out, stretching her legs. The back door of the quaint house opened and a woman stepped out, smiling and looking so much like an older version of her sister-in-law.

  “You can’t be Sheilagh,” the woman said, smiling. “Last I saw you, you were a little girl. What a beautiful woman you’ve grown into!”

  Sheilagh waited for Alec then walked over to greet the woman. “Hi, Mrs. Dougherty. This is Alec.”

  Mrs. Dougherty shook his hand and hugged her close. “Well, come along. The kids are watching a movie with their grandfather and Sammy and Colin are making dinner.”

  Alec carried their bags into the house and Sheilagh drew in a deep breath. He paused at the door. “You ready?”

  “Yup.”

  They followed Samantha’s mother into the B&B and a shiver ran through her. No backing out now.

  “You can leave your bags there by the step and I’ll have Sammy’s father carry them to your rooms.”

  The house was beautiful, built for entertaining and secret getaways. As they reached the dining room the scent of pasta had her stomach growling. They turned the corner and there were Sammy and Colin. Colin grinned and held out his arms. She ran to her brother and hugged him for a solid minute.

  Kissing her hair, he said, “You know they’re going to kill me for this.”

  “I know. Thank you for coming.”

  He gave her shoulders a squeeze and whispered, “Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

  She turned and hugged Sammy. “Thanks for coming.”

  “That’s what sisters are for. I brought you something.”

  Sheilagh eased back. “What?”

  Samantha smiled. “It’s upstairs. Come on.”

  She glanced at Alec who was talking with Colin as he stirred the sauce. She followed Sammy through the house and up the stairs. “Ready?” Sammy asked, turning the knob to one of the guestrooms.

  Sheilagh nodded. Samantha pushed the door open and she gasped. Hanging from a sconce on the wall was her Morai’s wedding gown, the same gown Samantha had worn when she married Colin.

  “My grandmother’s gown,” she whispered as her hand traced over the delicate Irish lace.

  “I was a bit larger, having just had Tallulah when I wore it, but my mom swears she can take it in by tomorrow. She wants you to try it on before dinner.”

  Sheilagh smiled, emotion choking her. She grabbed Samantha and pulled her into a rough hug. “I love you. I’m so glad you’re my sister.”

  “I love you too. Want to try it on?”

  They shut the door and Sammy helped her dress. The gown was loose around the waist, but as soon as Mrs. Dougherty showed up with a basket full of pins they had it fitting properly. The woman was certain it would only take the work of a slight modesty panel and some extra lacing along the back.

  After dinner Alec disappeared with Colin. Sammy giggled and whispered, “He brought a kilt for your man.”

  “No.”

  Samantha nodded and grinned. “Oh, yeah. He’s a McCullough now.”

  Sheilagh stilled. “Actually, I’ll be a Devereux. Sheilagh Devereux. Does that sound all right?”

  “It sounds lovely.”

  She glanced at the door and back at Samantha. Keeping her voice low, she asked, “Sammy, what’s going on with Luke?”

  Samantha’s expression faltered. “What—what do you mean?”

  “Is he okay?”

  Something flashed in her eyes and Sheilagh sucked in a breath. “Do you know?”

  Sammy’s gaze darted away guiltily. “Know what?”

  “Don’t lie to me, Samantha McCullough.”

  Samantha’s eyes were wide, her mouth grasping for words that weren’t there. “Are you talking about Tristan?” she whispered.

  She knew. “Yes. What’s happening to them and how long have you known?”

  Her expression turned guilty. “I’ve known since I was with Braydon. Does anyone else know?”

  This was insane. All this time someone else knew and Sheilagh had no idea. “No. I don’t think anyone knows. I thought I was the only one. Does Colin know?”

  “I don’t think so, at least not from me. I’ve never told anyone.”

  “Well, what’s happening? I talked to Tristan and he said they broke up,” Sheilagh quickly rushed out before the others returned.

  “I don’t know. Luke’s so private. He’d never admit to anything. I know Tristan was missing for a while and now he’s back, but neither of them have been hanging around. It isn’t like it’s my place to ask.”

  “Tristan said he’s moving,” she told Sammy.

  “What? He can’t move. Center County’s his home.”

  The sound of Alec and Colin laughing in the hall had them leaning back in their chairs. This was a mess. While she had the chance, she said, “They need to stop hiding.”

  Sammy nodded and the men entered the kitchen. “Hi,” Sheilagh said as Alec bent to kiss her cheek.

  “You’re brother seems to think I’ll be saying my vows in a dress.”

  Sheilagh laughed. “It’s a kilt, not a dress.”

  “I think I’ll wear the suit I brought.”

  She shrugged as if it made no difference. “That’s fine, but just so you know, kilts are sexy as hell.” He raised a brow and she tipped her head. “Sammy?”

  Samantha turned and nodded. “Yes, nothing sexier than a man in a kilt.”

  Sheilagh ga
ve him a cheeky smile. “See?”

  Since arriving at the B&B, Alec had calmed a great deal. Colin, although not Sheilagh’s parent, seemed okay with what they were doing. The evening had been cordial and nothing was as great as seeing Sheilagh so happy.

  The girls returned upstairs for some wedding project they were working on and Colin settled back into the kitchen table and slid him a beer after returning from putting the kids to bed.

  “I think we should talk about this,” Sheilagh’s brother said.

  Alec liked Colin. He seemed a hell of a lot more levelheaded than the rest. Alec sipped his beer and nodded. “Probably not a bad idea.”

  “I’m going to assume you love my sister and know what you’re doing.”

  “I love Sheilagh very much. Nothing in my past can compare to the feelings I have for her.”

  “Good. She’s a handful and I think you have to love her so you don’t wind up strangling her.”

  “Sheilagh is…” He thought for a moment. Sheilagh was so many things. She was adventurous, yet hesitant. Brave, yet afraid. Wise, yet inexperienced in certain realms. “She’s a beautiful example of being human. I love everything about her, even her flaws.”

  “She’s happy with you,” Colin said. “I see it, where most people choose not to. Not the happiness, but the absence of the sadness.”

  Alec put down his bottle and eyed Colin. He wouldn’t betray Sheilagh. “She’s been facing a lot of her fears, coping with them, and hopefully, in time, they’ll fade away.”

  “I think going away to school was something she needed.”

  “Agreed, although it wasn’t always something she wanted. She’s stubborn and lets the untried parts of life intimidate her.”

  Colin watched him for a minute, his eyes scrutinizing. “Why did your last marriage end?”

  That was a bold question, but in light of their current circumstances and the fact Colin was there to support his little sister, Alec was persuaded to answer. “My ex-wife is gay.”

  Colin stilled, lips parted, gaze pegged to Alec’s as though measuring the truth of his confession. Finally, he said, “I imagine you and Sheilagh have had some pretty interesting discussions on the subject.”

  That wasn’t necessarily Colin acknowledging the fact his brother was gay and Alec wasn’t about to divulge information that wasn’t his to give. However, there was another man involved—not a McCullough—and Alec wasn’t so inclined to protect him. “Are you referring to Tristan?”