Come Home with Me

by Susan Fox

  It was a day off for both of them, this Monday, a few days after Miranda had taken the injured bunny to the vet clinic. Although she’d checked a couple of times on the rabbit’s progress, she had yet to give Luke a “yes” or “no” on going out with him again. Maybe this morning’s coffee chat would help her come up with the right answer.

  But it was too soon to dump her man problems on Glory, so instead she focused on the girls. “I never thought of trying this game out on Ariana. I’m not much of a bowler.”

  Glory made a face, her fine features scrunching up, which, combined with her short cap of black hair, made her look even more pixie-like. “I’m pathetic at bowling myself, though Brent loves it. But this game’s fun.”

  “I’m not sure Ariana grasps the concept of bowling, but she loves whacking down the monsters.” Not that the term really applied to the brightly colored plush toys, which were anything but scary.

  Glory laughed. “Same with Gala. It’s driving Brent nuts. He’s all about, ‘You have to use the ball to knock them over,’ and Gala’s just as happy to use one monster to bash another. She’s either a slow learner or a rule breaker. Or has violent tendencies.” She frowned. “None of which is good.”

  “You’re not seriously worried, are you?” Miranda had thought she was the only one who obsessed over things like this.

  “Not so much, but it’s hard, right? I mean, you want your child to be everything. Healthy, happy, smart.”

  Miranda nodded.

  “But really, they’re just kids,” Glory said. “My parents and grandparents help me keep perspective. And so do the seniors at the lodge. Some have the greatest advice.”

  “I get advice, too, from Eden’s parents and her aunt and uncle. And Kara at the store. I appreciate it, but, well, they’re all older than me. It’s really nice to talk to you, to someone my age, going through this for the first time like I am.”

  Glory nodded. “I hear you. So we’ll share. Stupid worries and smart tips.”

  Miranda smiled, knowing she was making a friend. “If I ever come up with a smart tip, I’ll be sure to tell you.”

  The other woman put down her coffee cup and rested her chin on her hands as she stared at the children. “Do you feel like you’re being watched all the time?”

  “Watched?” Miranda studied her profile. Was this seemingly normal woman maybe suffering from paranoia? “You mean, like, stalked?”

  A laugh burst from Glory’s lips and when she turned to Miranda, her brown eyes gleamed. “Oh man, yeah, it is kind of like that. By everyone. Everyone in this teeny little community. They’re all watching. Waiting for you to screw up. Wondering stuff about you.”

  “Stuff?”

  Her mouth twisted. “Like wondering if Brent’s ever going to”—she made air quotes—“‘put a ring on it.’ And don’t you just hate that expression?”

  “Oh my God, on so many levels! Like hello, feminism has happened. This isn’t the dark ages.”

  “Exactly,” Glory said. “And anyhow, it’s up to each couple to decide how they want to structure their relationship, right? It’s no one else’s business.”

  “It sure isn’t. Lots of couples are happy and committed but don’t believe in marriage. Like Di and Seal.”

  She meant to be supportive but Glory didn’t look entirely reassured as she muttered, “That’s true.”

  Miranda returned to the original subject. “Anyhow, yeah, I sure know what you mean about feeling watched. It’s impossible for me to even just start clean with most people, so they don’t have any preconceptions. You, for example. You work with Eden, you were in Aaron’s class in high school, you and I even were in school together. There’s stuff you know about me and have heard about me.” She huffed out a breath. “I’m amazed you invited me over.” Glancing at the two little ones expending their energy on plush monsters rather than in tantrums, she smiled. “Glad, but amazed.”

  “Miranda, our teens are when we try things out. Figure out who we really are.” She grinned, her good mood restored. “You obviously decided that Goth wasn’t the real you.”

  “No, but I haven’t exactly toed the straight and narrow either. Even after my Goth phase, I was a drifter. Fell for a bunch of guys, had a bunch of jobs. God knows, I’d probably still be doing it if Ariana hadn’t come along.”

  “But she did, and you’re not, and from what I can see you’re a great mom.” Glory bit into a chocolate-chip cookie and made an approving sound. “And you’ve lived an exciting life. Whereas me, I’ve just been on this island doing same old, same old.” She shrugged. “Which actually, for me, works really well.”

  “I’m not sure ‘exciting’ is the term I’d use for my life.”

  “One day you can tell me stories. When you know me better and trust me.”

  “I’ll do that,” Miranda agreed. She dipped a biscotti in her coffee and then savored the mixed flavors as it dissolved in her mouth.

  “I heard you and Luke Chandler were dancing at the community center a couple of weeks ago,” Glory said. At Miranda’s raised brows, she added, “What can I say? Being watched, right?”

  “Yeah, we were there. Along with my brother and Eden, Di and Seal, Luke’s mom, his stepdad up on stage, and his in-laws. And half the rest of the island. Not you, though. Eden says you like to dance, so I thought I might see you.”

  “My parents were busy and couldn’t babysit.”

  “If you ever get stuck for a sitter, let me know. Most evenings, I’m working on my computer, taking courses online. I could bring over Ariana and the computer and watch Gala. Or you could drop her off at my place.”

  “That’s supersweet of you.” She cocked her head. “Dare I ask? I mean, tell me if I’m being pushy.”

  “To ask me to babysit?”

  “No, I mean about you and Luke.”

  “Ah.” Here was an opportunity, and from what she’d seen, Glory was perceptive and not judgmental. Her perspective could be helpful. “We’ve hung out a couple of times, him with his kids and me with Ariana. And been on two dates. He seems like a nice guy.”

  Glory nodded. “Everyone likes him. This woman I work with thinks he walks on water. He found this cutting-edge treatment for her sick dog and saved his life.”

  “I’ve seen him work.” She told Glory about the bunny. “He was so gentle with it. He has these big hands, right? So masculine. But the confident, delicate way he treated that little creature, it was amazing.” The truth, one she wasn’t ready to share with anyone, was that, watching Luke treat that rabbit, she’d fallen a little bit in love with him. It seemed that veterinary medicine could be just as exciting and sexy as music or acting, at least when Luke was the practitioner.

  “Very sexy.” Glory winked. “You have to love a man with good hands.”

  “You’re so bad.” But yes, Miranda had imagined those hands exploring her body, not to heal but to arouse. “So anyhow, he asked me out again and I do like him, but I’m not sure.”

  “You small-L like him or large-L like him?”

  “Large,” she admitted.

  “Then why wouldn’t you go out with him?” Brown eyes gleaming, she added, “And find out exactly how good those hands can be.”

  Despite her concerns about dating Luke, Miranda cracked up at that comment. But then she sighed. “His mom and mother-in-law told me that he and his boys deserve another Candace. And they’re right.”

  She frowned. “What does that even mean? There was only one Candace. Yeah, he loved her since forever, and it’s tragic that she died, but the fact is that she’s gone.”

  “They mean someone perfect, like her.”

  Glory snorted. “Okay, for one thing she wasn’t perfect.”

  “No? Really? Everyone seems to think so.”

  “Admittedly, she was great. But everyone has some weaknesses, some flaws.”

  Miranda narrowed her eyes. “Would it be really rude to ask if you know any of Candace’s?”

  Glory shrugged. “Look, I li
ked her a lot, okay? But she was a little too obsessed with how she looked. I get it, because her mom’s a superstrong feminist and against anything girly. Like, when Candace was little, she wasn’t allowed to wear pink. Her toys had to be gender-neutral. Once Candace had a decent allowance and was allowed to choose her own clothes and stuff, she indulged her girly side.”

  “That’s kind of understandable,” Miranda said a little grudgingly. “Any other flaws?”

  “This is going to sound petty, but is being too nice a flaw? She was just, well, never petty or mean. She was friendly to everyone, generous, always sunny and sweet. If she ever had PMS or was in a bad mood, she didn’t show it.” Glory wrinkled her nose. “I sound like a total bitch, don’t I?”

  “No, I get it. Well, at least you won’t have that problem with me. No one’s ever accused me of being too nice. But it does make me wonder why Luke wants to date me.”

  “You’re not competing, Miranda,” Glory said firmly. “You’re you. Don’t try to compare yourself to her.”

  “Even if I don’t, Luke’s mom and mother-in-law will. Probably he will, too,” she added gloomily. “And believe me, I have lots of flaws.”

  “Being human is good,” Glory asserted. “If you big-L like Luke, give him a chance. Give yourself a chance. See where it goes.” Her eyes narrowed. “Or are you jumping ahead, thinking about getting married and blending families?”

  “God, no. No, but . . .” She sighed. “This is all so different for me. It’s the first time I’ve had a relationship where kids were involved. What if his boys don’t like me? They haven’t exactly warmed to me so far. They’ve never had a mother, but there are photos of Candace in the house and I’m sure Luke and the grandparents talk about her. The boys know she’s their mom, and they’ve had their dad to themselves. Luke hasn’t been dating, so this is new to them. I’m sure they wonder who I am and why Ariana and I are being thrust into their lives.”

  “Give it time. Don’t push, just let it come naturally.”

  “Ariana’s already nuts about Luke.” She studied her daughter, who was bashing one monster with another, giggling madly. “If the twins do come to like me, and then Luke and I end up breaking up”—which, let’s face it, seemed likely given her track record with guys—“what’ll it do to the three kids?”

  Glory slid off her stool and topped up their cups with plain coffee. When she sat down again, she picked up a biscotti and said, “I hear you. Once you’re a mom, you always have to put the kids first.” Her dark eyes got a sad, distant expression.

  Miranda remembered how Glory had said that her birth parents had abandoned her. Was that what she was thinking about now? Should Miranda say something?

  Before she could decide, Glory shrugged. “Life has no guarantees. We hope for happy endings. Sometimes we get them, but sometimes we don’t. I think you probably know that better than a lot of people our age.”

  “Yes.” What was the other woman saying?

  “And we cope,” Glory said firmly. “We may feel awful, but we cope. You can’t . . . not live, just because you’re afraid life may hurt.” She dipped the biscotti and bit into the soggy end.

  Miranda had always coped. Even last summer, when she’d hit an all-time low, she hadn’t given up. She’d swallowed her pride, admitted to being totally pathetic, and come crawling to Aaron for help. Because of Ariana. If she’d been on her own with no money for rent, Miranda would have found a couch here and there to camp on. But no way would she inflict that life on her daughter. So she’d coped in the only way she could—and as a result, her life had slowly turned around. “When it’s just me, I’ll take risks. But I don’t want Ariana to get hurt.”

  “Of course you don’t.” Glory gently touched Miranda’s hand. “But here’s the thing, the really scary thing. Our daughters will get hurt. Life will hurt them. It’s inevitable. You know that.”

  “I do. But I don’t want to be the instrument of that hurt.” It was the thing she’d most tried to avoid. There were times she’d subsisted on generic ramen noodle soup, but she’d always made sure Ariana had decent food. Even if she’d had to go to the food bank. Or even, once or twice, resort to tricks learned in childhood and shoplift.

  “So you plan never to date, because the relationship might not work out? You’ll cut Ariana off from getting to know a great guy like Luke? You’ll nix the possibility of her ever having a father who loves her?”

  “Oh God.” Miranda buried her face in her hands. “I didn’t think of it that way.”

  “So stop being so angsty. You like the guy, he’s one of the good ones, and he wants to date you. Go. Have fun, talk.” Her tone lightened. “See what those big hands are capable of.” She wiggled the biscotti suggestively, indicating that hands weren’t all she meant. “See where things go. If it works, that’ll be awesome for you and Ariana, and for Luke and his boys. If it doesn’t, trust in your ability to cope and your ability to help Ariana deal with it.”

  “You make it sound so reasonable.” Which gave Miranda hope, and she managed a small smile. “Could you now please have the same talk with Sonia and Annie?” She added a quick “Just kidding, of course.”

  Chapter Thirteen

  Luke drove his white SUV slowly through the grounds at SkySong, with the boys in their booster seats in back. The forecast had for once been right and the sun shone with surprising warmth for this time of year. April had just begun and spring was literally springing out all around him. Pink blossoms festooned the magnolias and ornamental fruit trees, daffodils were giving way to tulips and hyacinths, and a pale green haze of buds and unfurling leaves skimmed the deciduous trees. In the vegetable and herb garden, Seal and several others were at work. Miranda had told Luke that many of the retreat’s guests enjoyed tending the organic garden and the grounds. Down on the lawn by the ocean, he saw Di, graceful in a flowing top and leggings, leading others through moves he guessed were tai chi.

  He pulled up in front of Miranda’s cabin, where she and Ariana sat side by side on the top step. With a warning, “Be nice, guys,” he turned off the engine and climbed out.

  Brandon and Caleb were less than thrilled about having two girls come along on their Sunday outing. Luke wasn’t sure whether it was the gender of their guests that most bothered them, or having to share their dad’s attention.

  Miranda smiled and stood as he approached, as fresh and springlike as the flowering trees in her pink T-shirt and tan capris. But it was Ariana who gave him the warmest welcome. “Luke!” she cried excitedly, bouncing to her feet and stretching her arms up to him.

  He hoisted her. “Hey, Ariana. I’ve missed you.” Shifting her to one arm, he reached out his free hand to touch Miranda’s shoulder but, mindful of her prickliness and his sons’ gazes, didn’t lean in for a kiss. “You too. I’m glad you decided to come.”

  “So am I.” Her faded-denim eyes twinkled. “It’s Sunday and you shaved.”

  He winked. “Because this is a date. You okay with that?”

  She smiled again, a slow-spreading one. “I guess I am.” She slipped one strap of a small backpack over her shoulder. “Are you finally going to reveal where we’re headed? I’m thinking the kayaks on the roof are a clue.”

  “Can’t fool you for a minute, can I?” He owned one kayak and had borrowed another kid-friendly one from neighbors. “We’re going to Thuqulshunum Lake,” he said as they went down the steps, him carrying Ariana. “Do you know how to kayak?”

  “I went out a couple of times with Aaron last summer. But Luke, the kids are too young for kayaking.”

  “Too young to do it on their own, but it’s never too early to get them comfortable on the water. Does Ariana swim?”

  “Swim?” Ariana picked up on the word. “I swim!” Her big brown eyes were so bright and pretty.

  “You do?” he said. “That’s wonderful. What a smart girl you are.”

  “She splashes and paddles, wearing water wings, with me right beside her,” Miranda clarified.


  “I has wings!” Ariana said.

  “Just like a fairy,” Luke said. “I guess that makes you a water fairy.” When she looked puzzled, he tried again. “A swim fairy?”

  She nodded vigorously. “I swim fairy.”

  They’d reached his SUV and Miranda said, “I’ll go get her car seat out of my Toyota.”

  “Before you do, take a look in back. I brought one of the boys’ old seats. See if it’ll work.”

  She opened the door to the back seat, where his boys sat in their front-facing boosters and he’d installed the smaller rear-facing one for Ariana. “Hey Caleb, Brandon,” she said.

  “Hey,” Brandon said in an unfriendly tone, while Caleb didn’t reply at all. If the boys didn’t smarten up, he’d be having words with them.

  The dogs were enthusiastic, though. Three-legged Honey and fluffy little Pigpen barked tail-wagging greetings from the back of the SUV.

  “Nice to see all of you,” Miranda said. “All set to go kayaking, boys?”

  “We kayak with Dad,” Brandon asserted.

  Luke winced. “What do you think of the car seat, Miranda?”

  “It looks good. I’m glad it’s rear-facing. At the store, we recommend keeping kids in them as long as possible, even up to age four.”

  “It’s a little kid seat,” Brandon said dismissively.

  “Well, Ariana’s a lot smaller and younger than you,” Miranda said in a friendly tone. “When she’s a big kid like you two, she’ll get a different seat.”

  “We’re big kids,” Caleb said proudly.

  “Good,” Luke said. “Because big kids are polite to their guests.”

  Brandon’s gaze fixed on Miranda’s bare left forearm and his eyes widened. “You have a tattoo! It’s a dragon!”