Blackbird Flies

by Chynna T. Laird

  The two men made their way to the truck, Liam’s army boots crunching the Hoarfrost clinging to the grass. Payton shook his head. Almost May and there was still frost.

  He was definitely living in the wrong country.

  Well, he thought. Here we are, yet again, on another road trip.

  Wonderful. I have to figure out the bus route around here. Or get my driver’s license.

  Payton opened his canvas bag to grab his MP3 player when the smell of Katie’s breakfast sandwich he’d stashed blasted out, filling the car with a greasy, sausage smell. His stomach lurched.

  “You gonna eat that thing?” Liam asked.

  Payton shook his head.

  Liam reached across Payton’s lap, grabbing the sandwich. “Then give that to me,” he said.

  At the next red light, Liam undid his seatbelt, leaned out his window then tossed the heart-attack-in-a-bun into the back of the truck.

  “Sorry,” he said, doing his seatbelt back up. “But that’s just the most disgusting thing there is. I think I ate too much of that stupid Blizzard last night. Katie means well, but I chucked mine in the trash can on the way out to the truck.”

  A smile spread across Payton’s face, then he sputtered out a laugh. He couldn’t help it. For some reason seeing his father, Mr. Starchy, throwing the little breakfast hockey puck into the back of the truck was too hilarious.

  Liam laughed too.

  Laughing made the car ride much shorter because they were suddenly in front of the school. Payton pulled his hood up, grabbed his bag then shoved the truck door open.

  “Katie will pick you up at eleven-thirty. See ya later.”

  Payton nodded.

  Liam drove off while he stared at the school, his hands stuffed deep inside the kangaroo pocket of his sweatshirt. His heart pounded. He shuffled across the grass, following the shuffle marks of other students, to the front doors. That’s when he saw her.

  Lily.

  She stood under a huge oak tree with the same small group of girls he’d seen her with the first time. Their tiny outfits. Too tiny, in his opinion, for such a frosty morning. It gave away their source of income. Lily looked out of place dressed in an oversized sweatshirt, faded boot-cut jeans and thick-soled army-styled boots.

  She saw him, and smiled.

  Payton shot her a peace sign. She waved, then turned back to her friends. Pulling the heavy double doors open, he wondered if she was…one of them.

  He forced the thought from his mind.

  The doors slamming behind him echoed down the hall. A ginormous sign hung crookedly from the ceiling, ‘Welcome New Students!’

  He sighed, then made his way to the auditorium. The orientation went fine. He got his welcome package with all the information about the school. He got the pamphlets about the history of the college, scholarships he qualified for and the rules and regulations of the school, as well as a letter detailing that because he’d already graduated from high school, he could work on earning more scholarships by concentrating on his music.

  Perfect.

  What he didn’t get was why it would take two hours.

  At the end, he scanned the auditorium for Lily. She was missing. He shoved the welcome pack into his canvas bag, took out his MP3 player and headphones then went back up towards the front doors.

  Then he saw her again.

  And she was alone.

  The closer he got to her, the rubberier his knees got. His heart pounded in his throat. He just hoped she couldn’t tell.

  “Hey,” she said, waving him over. “So you made it, hey? Didn’t think you’d show up.”

  Payton stuffed an ear bud into his right ear, letting the other bud dangle down his chest.

  “Yeah, well. Didn’t have too much of a choice.”

  “Your dad made you come?”

  “No. Not really. Just something I promised my grandfather.”

  Lily flipped her hair over her tiny shoulders. “Ah. Well, whatever. It’s good you’re here. So, what do you think? You coming back?”

  Payton shrugged, pushing his glasses up to the bridge of his nose. “I don’t know. I mean, I’ve always wanted to come here and everything. I need to think about it.”

  “What’s there to think about?” she said, sputtering a laugh. “Everything is paid for, right? You got a place to stay and, obviously, you got parents that give enough of a crap to make sure you get here. Sorry, but I overheard the yelling the other day. Geez! Some of us would kill for half of that.”

  He frowned. That was almost too much information.

  “Yeah…well…there’s someone I gotta talk to before I make a final decision.”

  “Grandpa?” she asked, pushing the door.

  “Yeah,” he said. “How did you know that?”

  “You seem to care a lot about him and what he thinks. Maybe he can help ya work it out.”

  He grabbed the dangling ear bud, and stuffed it into his left ear. “You sound like a counselor or something.”

  She smiled. “Kinda, I guess. You’ll have to come back and get to know me.”

  His step-mother’s car screeched down the side street. He was tempted to keep her waiting just to give her a good scare. He decided that might not be such a great idea in case his siblings were with her.

  “Maybe I’ll take you up on that. We’ll see.”

  He started down the steps, then Lily grabbed his arm.

  “Hey, look. You got a great thing. Don’t mess it up. I don’t want to sound like a fortune cookie here, but you’re the only person who can allow something or someone to mess you up. Take it for what it is. Give him a break.”

  Who? Dad?

  Grandad?

  He didn’t know what to say.

  “Anyway,” she said. “See ya tomorrow. Maybe. Hopefully.”

  He nodded. “Yeah. Maybe.”

  He turned on his music. John Lennon sang about how in his life, he loved some person more.

  Payton was starting to understand.

  Katie frantically waved at him to hurry.

  He didn’t.

  It would be a long ride home. But at least Katie chatted once in a while.

  * * *

  After supper, Payton gave Liam the information from the school to look over. Since the man was paying for his education, he might as well know what his bucks would get.

  “So, this is this stuff they gave me today.”

  “Okay,” his dad said. “I’ll go over this and see if there’s anything else we need to do. What did you think of the place?”

  Payton wanted to retaliate. Tell his dad he hated the place and wanted to go back home. But his grandfather taught him to be honest.

  “It’s all I thought it would be and more.”

  “Well…good. Then we’ll work from it.”

  After that, Payton excused himself from the dinner table and went down to his room.

  He lay on his back, in the darkness, listening to Blackbird by the Beatles. Things were happening too quickly. Too much had gone on, and he still wasn’t sure whether he actually understood everything.

  A week earlier, he’d been a regular guy brooding over his mother’s death and expecting to spend the summer working at the local pharmacy. And then he was thrown on a train and sent to live with strangers who seemed more messed up than he was.

  He closed his eyes, squeezing the tears away.

  Blackbird singing in the dead of night…take these broken wings and learn to fly…all your life…you were only waiting for this moment to arise.

  His ear bud was suddenly jerked out of his ear. He sat up, sick of being interrupted and ready to yell. Katie stared in his eyes, speaking softly, “I tried knocking but you didn’t answer. Your grandfather is on the phone.”

  Payton jumped off his bed, forgetting he was still attached to his player. He ripped the headphones out, throwing the player on his pillow, then thanked Katie as he ran by her. He grabbed the receiver hanging down from the phone and put it to his ear.

 
; “Granddad?”

  “Hey, boy. How are ya? Sorry we haven’t called sooner. We wanted to give you a chance to settle in.”

  “No worries. Everything’s okay. Went and checked out that college today. Wished you would’ve told me that was why you sent me here.”

  His grandfather let out a deep breath, then said. “It was one of the reasons. Look, son. There’s something else you need to know since the cards are all being laid out.”

  Great, Payton thought. More things I need to know. These people must run out of this information eventually, right?

  “What?”

  Grandpa cleared his throat. “The reason we agreed to sending you out there…to letting your dad take ya in and pay for school…is because, well…Grandma and I aren’t getting any younger, you know? This house is just too big and too much work.”

  Payton didn’t like where the conversation was heading. “I know that. That’s why I wanted to stay there so I could help you. You know I had my summer job lined up and I could’ve helped out. I’d do the yard work and stuff. I’ll come back home—”

  “Son, that’s not a life for a young man,” his grandfather interrupted. “Your Grandma and me, we appreciate what you’ve done, but you’ve been taking care of the adults around you all your life. You need to be with kids your own age, having experiences…enjoying the rest of your life. This isn’t where you belong anymore.”

  Payton stayed silent.

  His eyes burned.

  “You’re there because it’s a better place for you. Grandma and I are moving into the retirement home over by the river. We just don’t have the money to live here anymore and haven’t for a long time. We’ve sold the house and we’re moving into a two-bedroom flat with everything included. It’s what we need to do. We need to enjoy the rest of our lives without worrying.”

  “…about me?” Payton whispered, tears falling down his cheeks. Payton wiped his face on his sleeve. “You should’ve told me all of this, Granddad. Why doesn’t anyone tell me the important stuff? I’m not a kid anymore. I can handle it.”

  Granddad’s voice squeaked when he finally spoke again. “We know that. Payton, we’re so proud of you. You have no idea. You’re the spitting image of your mom, but you’re so much stronger than she was. Stay there. Slow your life down and enjoy it. Give your father a chance.”

  Give your father a chance

  Funny.

  That’s not the first time he’d been given that advice in the past few days. They chatted a bit more about life in the MacGregor house, the school and his music. He decided not to delve into the conversation about his mom getting kicked out. And Granddad didn’t bring it up. It was silently acknowledged, and dismissed.

  After twenty minutes Granddad said, “Look, son. I have to go. This is already skyrocketing our phone bill into high Heavens. Our number is the same. We’re still here, and we love you. We’ll call you after we’ve moved.”

  Payton gripped the headset in his fist. “I love you too, Gramps. Give my love to Gran.”

  “Will do, son. Do us proud.”

  Click.

  He held the phone to his ear until that irritating beeping went off that told people their phone was off the hook, then he hung up.

  “Everything okay, Pay?” Katie asked, suddenly appearing around the corner.

  Payton brushed by her, heading for the stairs. “Fine. It’s not like you didn’t hear anything. ‘Night.”

  “I didn’t. I respect your privacy. Just…know we’re here.”

  He was tired of being told that.

  He didn’t even wash up or change. He just wanted to fall into a deep sleep and not wake up for a few days.

  Or at least for a few solid hours.

  Blackbird played on automatic rewind while he absorbed his grandfather’s words. It was the crappiest month ever.

  He lost his mom. He technically lost his grandparents. He lost the only home he ever felt safe in. Something good had to happen, eventually.

  It felt good to be able to shut his mind off…even for just a little while. His body tingled from exhaustion. Then slowly, muscle by muscle, he relaxed until the Beatles lulled him into a dreamless sleep.

  Eight

  “Katie’s driving you to school today,” Liam said to Payton, buttoning up his camouflage shirt. “I have an early meeting today with the Brigadier General. I hate starting my day off like this. Nothing productive ever happens at these stupid meetings. Don’t even know why he’s coming. But I have to be there.”

  Payton blew out a heavy sigh. His day hadn’t started off any better. The batteries in his MP3 player died because he’d forgotten to recharge them. And all of his sweatshirts were in the washing machine because Katie kindly grabbed all his clothes while he was in the shower and his little siblings jumped on his bed—with their outdoor shoes on—during the mass clean-up, stomping all over his precious Mozart music.

  “Oh, Payton,” Katie had said, trying to smooth out the wrinkled pages covered in little foot prints. “We can get you a new one.”

  “It was my mother’s,” Payton snapped, snatching the music book from her unusually small hands.

  Then, after all of that, he had to spend the next half hour with the woman whom he knew would yap for the entire car ride.

  Wonderful.

  On his way out the door, Liam said, “I’ll pick you up after school, okay?”

  “Sounds good. See ya.”

  Payton slumped into a loveseat, staring at the ceiling, and waited while Katie got Dahlia ready for the school bus and River ready for daycare.

  Dahlia came over to her big brother. She tapped his knee. “I’m sorry I wrecked your music book,” she said. “I didn’t mean to. I didn’t see it there.”

  Payton looked into her ocean-blue eyes, tearing perfectly, her lower lip quivering.

  Kids.

  He softened, and ruffled her braids. “No real harm done, kiddo,” he said. “Next time, just make sure nothing’s there before you start your Tigger jumps.”

  She brightened. “Okay, I promise. I’m gonna tell all my classmates about you. I think you’re Tigger-ific.”

  Payton gave her a half-smile, then she tackle-hugged him just as the bus pulled up, honking its arrival.

  “See ya later, ‘gator,” he said.

  She waved at him, kissed and hugged Katie and River, then sprinted out to the bus.

  Within minutes, the rest of the MacGregor crew was in Katie’s car. After dropping River off at his home-daycare, Katie and Payton began their car ride downtown.

  The difference between Katie and Liam, in terms of conversation, was huge. Liam didn’t seem interested in talking for the sake of making noise where Katie seemed to need it. She didn’t shut up from the moment they dropped River off to a few blocks before Payton’s drop off point. It was definitely much more torturous than driving in silence with his dad.

  Payton finally had to intervene. “Um, you know, you don’t need to talk so much,” he said. “I don’t mind just listening to the radio. In fact, I’d prefer it.”

  Katie’s face flushed. “Oh, well, I…I’m sorry. I was just trying to—“

  “Don’t try,” Payton said, staring straight ahead. “Please.”

  When they got to the side street she’d picked him up at the day before, she slammed the car into park.

  “Look. I’m sorry,” she said. “I don’t expect to be a mother to you. You had a mother. But I’m trying to be friends here, at least. Cut me some slack, will you?”

  He ignored her, trying to open his door.

  Katie grabbed his arm. “Look, you and I have a lot in common, Payton,” she said, her voice trembling. “I lost both of my parents the same age as you did. Dad to cancer, then Mom to booze. I think if you gave me a chance, you’d find we could at least become friends. You have your music to absorb your thoughts. I clean and organize stuff. Just…well…I’m here, that’s all. Your dad will pick you up later.”

  He paused before getting out. Did he
have a, “The Doctor Is IN” sign hanging around his neck? He grabbed his backpack, got out of the vehicle then watched Katie’s car skid off down the street.

  Payton was officially a jerk. He inhaled deeply, then turned to walk across the street. Just as he spun around, he walked smack into Lily.

  “Geez, man,” he said, exhaling sharply. “What are you doing here?”

  Lily put her hands up. “Sorry, I was over there the whole time,” she said. “I just didn’t want to jump out at you or anything.”

  “So, it’s better to lurk in the shadows to listen in on people’s conversations?” he said, stuffing his hands into his pockets and turning his back to her.

  She ran around him, then shoved her hand into his chest. “Hey, look. You don’t get to talk to me like that, alright?” she said, her face flushed. “This brooding, ‘James Dean’ thing you got going on may turn the chicks on where you’re from, but it doesn’t fly here. Especially there.” She pointed to the school. “Stuff the attitude and start accepting the fact there are people who actually give a crap about you, despite what a jerk you’re being.”

  She shoved him hard enough he stumbled back a few steps, then she jogged across the street. He watched her until she was halfway up the sidewalk to the front doors of the school.

  He stood there shivering, his shallow breath hanging in the air in small puffs.

  Well, he thought. I guess I’ve been told.

  Twice.

  By two different women.

  Payton wanted to run after Lily and apologize, but his stubborn size thirteen feet wouldn’t budge. So he just stood there…shivering…until the bell rang, jolting him back to full attention.

  He bolted across the street, narrowly missing the front bumper of a black pick up. The frosty spring air prickled his lungs, but he kept running all the way to the doors. He didn’t want to think about his dad, Katie or even Lily.

  There was a concert grand piano calling for him.

  And he needed to answer.

  * * *

  Because Payton had already graduated from high school, he was one of the handful of kids whose curriculum was geared more towards the music and working on getting scholarships. His schedule had him attending lectures in the mornings, then he got to spend the afternoons playing and/or performing.