by J. Darling
Linnie heard her name being called, as she stood in the produce section, picking through the apples. Looking up, she saw Nate’s mom heading towards her. “Oh, hi Bev. How are you?”
“I’m fine, dear. Thank you for asking,” Bev said, as she gave Linnie a big hug, “but what I want to know, is how you are? Gosh, look at you! Aren’t you gorgeous? We’ve missed you so much.”
Linnie nodded. “I’ve missed you too, and I’m doing okay, really.”
“Are you staying for a while, or will you be leaving soon?”
“I’m on a leave of absence from my job, so I’ll be around for five weeks, or so. At which point, I need to decide if I’m going back to Chicago, or moving on to something else.”
Looking hopeful, Bev continued, “Might you consider one of the hospitals closer to home? I’m sure they need nurses in St. Croix, or Amery.”
She wasn’t so sure she wanted that. “Possibly, but I don’t know what I want to do just yet. I came home to get some rest, and to think on it some, so we’ll see,” Linnie answered without commitment.
“Of course, I just hate to see you leave again. Could I interest you in coming over tomorrow and helping put together pictures for a slideshow presentation we’re showing at the school? It’s kind of like a scrapbook thing, but on the computer. I’d love the chance to spend some time with you.”
Thinking on it for a moment, Linnie decided she liked the idea. Nodding, she answered, “Yeah, I’d like that. What time should I come?”
Surprised, Bev answered excitedly, “Really? Oh Linnie, I’m so excited! How about you come around noon? We’ll have lunch, and then we’ll work on things till whenever, or till you need to leave.”
Feeling Bev’s enthusiasm, Linnie’s heart warmed, and she smiled in response. “Sound’s great. I’ll see you tomorrow at noon. Say hi to Steven for me, would you?” Then reaching for Bev, she gave her a hug goodbye.
She hadn’t gone farther than the baking aisle, when she ran into Wendy Peltner. They’d known each other all their lives. “Hi Wendy, it’s good to see you. How are you?” she asked.
“OMG! Is that you Linnie Albrecht? It is you! Never mind about me, how are you? Holy cow, look at you! My gosh, when did you get into town?”
Linnie chuckled. “Just a few days ago, and I’m doing good. I see you got a little one. Isn’t she precious?” Stepping closer, Linnie admired the squirming bundle.
“Oh yeah, her daddy and I are totally in love with her,” Wendy said proudly. How about you, any husband or children?”
Shaking her head, she answered, “No, not yet. But that’s okay, I’m in no rush. I just finished my Bachelor’s degree in nursing and am looking to take it easy for a while, so I’m good.”
Wendy’s face lit up. “Say, speaking of taking it easy, maybe you’d be interested in joining us at the Luck Country Inn. As part of the community education program, we’ve started a water aerobics class, and they let us use the hotel pool. Would you be interested?” Wendy asked.
Oooh, she liked that idea. She loved the water, and immediately saw herself lounging in the hot tub. You did come home to relax, she reminded herself. “That sounds like fun. When did they start that?”
“About a year ago. We had class this morning. My grandma watched Mia so I could go, and now I’m here to pick up a few things. The classes are Monday, Wednesday, and Friday from ten to eleven,” Wendy explained. “Just come and see if you like it, if you do, you can register later. We’d love to have you join us.”
Nodding her head enthusiastically, Linnie answered, “I’ll do that. I’m glad I ran into you. Thanks for inviting me, but I better keep moving if we’re going to have supper tonight. I’ll see you Friday, we can catch up more than.”
Rushing through the store, she quickly made her purchases and was on her way. She needed to hurry if she was going to get the food done on time. Having found her mother’s recipe box while cleaning, she’d decided to make another favorite for supper, homemade chocolate cake with homemade chocolate frosting. This was turning out to be a real nice day, she thought. To be honest, she hadn’t known what to expect, but having gone through some of her mother’s things, and then running into two dear friends that day, had been rather therapeutic. It didn’t hurt that she’d gotten so much rest either. Feeling lighter in thought and spirit, her beleaguered heart basked in the glow of simple serenity.
As she set the platter of food on the dinner table, Nate walked in the house. She couldn’t say for sure, but she felt confident Jake had called him, and told him to get his butt over there. It’s a good thing I made a triple batch of dumplings, she thought. Shifting gears, her mind reminisced. This was like old times, with Nate being there and all, spending time at the farm, eating meals with them. It’d been that way since forever, as he and Jake had been best friends from the time they were very young. As a result, her mother had often referred to Nate as her fourth son.
When he stepped into the kitchen, Kris moved to their mother’s chair, and Nate sat next to her. Looking at one another, they didn’t say anything, he simply put his hand under the table and gave her knee a squeeze. She tried to pretend he wasn’t there, which was impossible since he took up so much room, and they kept bumping elbows as he was left handed, and she right.
“You outdid yourself, baby girl,” her father said, as he sat back rubbing his stomach. “It was delicious.”
“Yeah,” Nik added. “We haven’t eaten this good in a long time. I think the last time we had dumplings was when mom made them. Thanks Linnie, it was real nice.”
Sitting back in her chair, she looked at the empty platter. They‘d eaten it all. Thinking of her mother, she felt wistful, and wondered if they were feeling that way too. Answering, she said, “It was good wasn’t it? I’m stuffed though, I shouldn’t have eaten so much, but I was really hungry this morning, and it sounded good. I’m glad you enjoyed it.”
“If you were hungry this morning, why didn’t you eat?” Jake asked with irritation.
They would always be protective, she thought, grinning. “I did eat, thanks to whoever left me the plate of food in the fridge, and now, two helpings of chicken and dumplings.” She sighed, as she patted her stomach. “I’m afraid I don’t have room for dessert.”
“What dessert?” Kris asked, perking up.
“The cake I made.” she answered, with a smile.
Jake’s silverware dropped with a clang. Then he asked with a hope filled voice, “What kind of cake? Boxed or homemade?”
Smiling widely now, she answered, “Mama’s chocolate cake.”
All three of her brothers jumped from their chairs, and started tearing the kitchen apart, looking for the cake. “Where is it Linnie?” Kris demanded.
“Yeah,” Jake said, turning to look back at her, “we want the cake.” Then jokingly added, “Tell us where it is, and no one will get hurt.”
She giggled at their silliness, and noticed her dad was smiling as he watched them. So they were all feeling it too, she thought. Sitting up, she answered, “Hah! With the way the three of you are acting, someone’s liable to lose a finger while the cake’s being cut. Besides, there’s no way any of you could be hungry. You just ate three batches of dumplings, for heaven’s sake. Not to mention, you all just destroyed my nice clean kitchen, and I want it put back together. So, when the kitchen’s clean, and the dishes are done, I might just remember where I put the cake. In the meantime, I’ll be in the family room.”
“Damn! She cooks like mom, and now she sounds like her too,” Nik said, to no one special as he started clearing the table.
Getting up to leave, her dad took her arm and pulled her down, giving her a kiss on the cheek. “You done good. Thanks for staying.”
After hugging him, she headed for the family room. With the nip in the air, she couldn’t imagine a better way to end this day but by sitting around a cozy fire. As she knelt in front of the fireplace, Nate came down beside her. Stopping what she was doing, she looked at him. He reache
d out and touched her face, caressing her cheek gently with his thumb.
“I worried when you slept so long. You doing okay?” he asked.
She nodded.
So, she still wasn’t talking, he thought. Taking a deep breath, he asked, “Linnie, will you talk to me?”
Turning and working to build the fire, she replied quietly, “I don’t know what to say.”
“How about we talk about what happened,” he suggested.
“I don’t need to talk about it,” she answered quickly, as she lit the fire.
He shook his head. If he wasn’t so torn up about her, he would laugh. This was so like her. He didn’t know a woman out there who’d let this sleeping dog lie. They’d want to know every detail and then some, while raking the guy over the coals. This was one of the reasons he loved her so much, she just wasn’t like other women. “It’s important we talk about it,” he pushed.
Resisting him, she responded, “No, not we, you, it’s important that you talk about it.”
Well, hadn’t she just hit the nail on the head? “Okay, when then? When can I talk with you about this?”
“Not today.”
“Can I ask why?”
Answering him as she built and banked the fire, she explained, “Because today, I woke up feeling the best I’ve felt in years, and I ran into some friend’s while I was out shopping and we had a nice visit, then I made one of my family’s favorite meals, and now we’re about to eat chocolate cake made from my mother’s recipe. I don’t want to ruin this day by being upset.”
She’d needed all that, he thought. Honestly, they’d all needed that little bit of normal. “Fair enough,” he said, and because he felt like he needed something, anything from her, he asked, “You want me to leave?”
Sitting back on her heels, she hesitated and answered while staring at the fire, “Only if you want to.”
“I don’t want to. I want to stay with you, and hold you, and love you forever.”
Turning slightly and lifting her eyes to his, she said softly, “Then don’t go.”
Taking her face in his hands, he kissed her with a passion.
CHAPTER 6
Linnie woke in Nate’s arms. The night before, they’d eaten cake, and sat by the fire watching TV to the point they both fell asleep on the couch. He was so warm, and she was surrounded by him. Turning to him, she snuggled in close against his chest. Tightening his hold, he dropped a sleepy kiss on the top of her head. He kissed me, she thought, thinking back on the moment. It was a sweet, yet passionate kiss, and she’d felt a small frisson of energy, a little leap, deep inside when his lips touched hers. It’d always been that way with him. Whenever they’d been apart, her stomach would be all butterflies and knots at the thought of seeing him again, and when they kissed, she’d get all warm and syrupy inside, leaving her wanting more of him.
Because of their closeness, she was certain people, including their families, assumed they’d been sexually active, but they’d never gone beyond touching and kissing. It wasn’t because they hadn’t wanted to, it was because it’d been smart at the time given their ages and the consequences. How smart were they being now, she wondered. More to the point, how smart was she being? Her heart was telling her to slow down, while her head was trying to convince her he’d come for her, and it was okay to throw caution to the wind, or wait, was it the other way around?
Oh man, they hadn’t even gotten started, and she already needed to slow this train down. She knew if she gave an inch, they’d go the full mile. Nate’s hand moved to her chin, and tilted it upwards. He had beautiful eyes, she thought, and in the dim morning light, she was lost in their sultry color.
“Good morning,” he said. “I would hope to wake like this every day, with you in my arms.”
He had a raspy morning voice, and upon hearing it, she felt a little flip, followed by a tightening within. Lifting her hand to his chest, he took her under the arms and pulled her up to face level. There was no escaping him, and honestly, she didn’t know if she really wanted to. His mouth was on her, on her lips, then her neck, her shoulder. Gentle, delicate, teasing nibbles, slowly up, and then back down. He was tantalizing, and she quivered as she gently moved her hands along his sides and up onto his strong, muscular back. When he came to her ear, his breath was hot, and his lips determined. She couldn’t stop the sounds that bubbled up in response to his ministrations.
Trying to turn her head to give him better access, she couldn’t. Picking her up with one arm, he had her under him in a moment’s time. Continuing his exploration, he brushed softly with his lips, rubbed tenderly with his bearded stubble, and she was about out of her mind from the sensations of erotic delight. Wanting more, and yet needing it to stop, she turned her face to him and he took her mouth, just seized it, kissing her long and deep, adding fuel to the fire that had started between them.
Gasping, the need for air breaking their kiss, he went back to attending to her ear and neck. Breathing hard, she was on fire, and couldn’t remember feeling this way, with such intensity, for a long, long time. Oh boy, if this is what he could do just by kissing her, then what about when… Oh Lord, she was in trouble, big trouble. Just then, she heard someone moving around upstairs. He’d heard it too, because he stopped what he was doing and put his forehead to hers, while he worked to reign in his control.
“We have to talk. Sooner than later,” he said, while breathing hard. “There’s stuff that has to be cleared up between us.” More deep breaths. “It’s important, you’re important, and you have to know what happened. If this goes further between us, I won’t be able to let you go if you change your mind. I don’t even know if I could now,” he said, as he moved to lay next to her.
“Hey,” Jake said, poking his head in the room.
“Your timing sucks,” Nate growled.
“Yeah, well so does yours,” Jake answered, as he walked through the room to the kitchen. “Dad’s up, and will be down any minute, so you might want to quit mauling his daughter before he walks in. I’d hate for you to have survived Iraq and Afghanistan, only to meet your maker in Luck, Wisconsin.”
Leaning in and kissing her on the temple, he asked, “Can I see you later?”
She shrugged. “Maybe, I’m going to spend the afternoon with your mom working on a project.”
Pleased with the knowledge, he nodded and smiled, then kissed her on the lips. Moving to get up, he answered, “Nice, I like that. Why don’t you go back to bed, get some more rest before you meet mom.”
“I might,” she answered, stretching a long stretch as she took advantage of the extra room on the couch, her shirt ridding up in the process. Pulling it down, she yawned and rubbed her bare arms.
Groaning at the sight, he rubbed his eyes with his thumb and forefinger, while giving his head a brisk shake. Taking a deep breath, he looked at her and said, “You’re killing me here.” Grabbing the blanket off the back of the couch, he wrapped it around her and tucked her in, kissing her once more time before leaving.
**********
Linnie stood on the front step of Nate’s house, waiting for his mom to answer the door. For whatever reason, she felt nervous. She couldn’t say why, she just did. She’d been to Nate’s house so many times in the past, it’d been like her own, but then everything changed, and— the door opened.
“Linnie, I’m so happy you’re here. You don’t have to wait, come on in,” Bev said, becoming misty eyed as Linnie walked into the house. “Oh my, it’s like it was… Oh never mind me,” she said, with a wave of the hand. “I’m just so happy. Things haven’t been right for a long time and now, they’re…better,” she finished with a smile. Then overwhelmed with emotion, she threw her arms around Linnie and hugged her tight, not letting her go.
Being there, held in Bev’s arms, was right and strange all at the same time. Linnie knew she held a special place in the Sanders’s heart, a place she’d always cherish, as they’d fully expected her to become their daughter. So, it was understan
dable they’d have missed her, as much as her own family, had while she’d been gone. That was the right part. The strange part, was that this was the first motherly nurturing she’d had, since her mother passed away. It felt good, and yet it was awkward and a little unsettling, too. Nate’s mom was one of the nicest people she’d ever known, and they’d always gotten along, but being here with her now, made Linnie feel the loss of her own mother more than ever.
Taking notice, Bev asked, “Is everything okay?” When she didn’t answer, Bev pulled her over to the couch and sat next to her. “I’d hoped this wouldn’t be difficult for you, but I see that it is. Can I say something to you, something I’ve wanted to say for a long time?”
Looking down, Linnie nodded.
“You’re the daughter I wish I could’ve had, and although I’ll never be your one true mother, I hope you’ll look upon me as one. No matter what happens, you can always come to me, you’re not alone.”
Crying, she was crying again. Weren’t they supposed to be working on a project or some shit? She hadn’t planned on this today. Man, when was the crying going to end? She hated crying. Well, at least she wasn’t bawling. Taking the box of tissues Bev was handing her, she used a couple to wipe away her tears. How had Bev known that was exactly how she was feeling? Alone. No mom, no sisters, no grandma, no aunts. Just Jules, and the men in her life. She really needed to get out more. Taking another tissue, and a deep breath, she looked at Bev and said, “Thank you. I appreciate that.”
