KISMET
Page 21
“That means Avery will be alone.” I refrain from rolling my eyes because that will make her cry.
“So we look for a house, talk to my sister and see if she’s good moving in to Avery’s. I’ll need to know what that rent is.” Shit, paying two payments isn’t ideal.
“Uh, Avery wouldn’t charge her rent.”
“I’m not okay with that.” Cue the waterworks.
“Why are you picking a fight with me?” Breathe in. Breathe out.
“I’m not, Embe. Let’s go lay down and figure it out later. I have a meeting tomorrow to give the coaches my new training schedule, and we start back next week.” She nods and cuddles close. Living situations will get handled, and she’ll feel better after a nap.
There was a cute four-bedroom house on the street behind her current house. We put an offer in, and it was accepted. So this is why during Thanksgiving break I’m moving us in. With everyone’s help. The living room is too big for the minimal furniture I had, but it will do. I’m sure her parents will want to help with that, too.
I try not to let it make me bitter, but it’s my job to provide for her, and they won’t let me. Give us the money for the house, buy the baby furniture, drop presents off— plus I know Emberlee still uses her credit card they pay for. It doesn’t matter, I added her to my account and gave her a card. Not one transaction from her.
Her damn bump where Smudge is nestled is so adorable. Saylor and her have grown closer, while Avery and Brecklynn are pretty involved. The guys and I start training hard next week, and I hate to say it— I’m ready. That girl is running me ragged. She doesn’t know it, and I won’t tell her. She isn’t demanding, but I refuse to let her do anything. It causes needless arguments . . . which I’m giving into more and more.
I wake to an empty house. A note informs me she and Saylor went shopping for Black Friday and amazing deals. I tried hard to stop my gloating when they announced last night they were expecting a girl. Fucker can suffer with me. Julie is a beautiful little girl, and I have no doubt their new one will be just as adorable. It’s fine now. It’s in twelve or thirteen years that I worry. And with good reason when I remember last night.
“Shit. Do they have seeds for lollipops?” Mason asked.
“Pop, Unc Mace.” Julie smiled from Deacon’s hip.
“You’re an a-s-s,” Saylor seethed. “And lollipops are candy. They don’t sprout from the ground, you buffoon.”
“Foon,” Julie chimes.
“Well, I need to stock up. Three princesses to wear me down.” He loves it. He and Julie are a sight to see.
Brecklynn has been absent, and it seems she and Mason avoid each other. Refuse to get involved. She doesn’t seem to be hurt, so maybe it just ran its course. “I have an idea, Mason. Learn the word no. I don’t want my kid filled up on candy.”
His mouth drops. “They have tears. Real tears. If you say no they use them. It hurts, man. You can’t tell them no. They’re Princesses.”
“Effing Matilda,” Saylor taunts.
“Ilda.” Julie laughs.
“S-H-I-T!” Saylor shrieks.
“Shortstop. A cuss word isn’t going to kill her,” Deacon tries to explain.
“Oh yeah, Mr. Hotshot baseball player. You don’t have to pick her up from daycare and learn she said a new cuss word. No thank you.” She slaps his chest, and Julie follows her lead.
“And by daycare you mean your mother-in-law? That big scary lady.” Mason makes fun of her. She bursts into tears and runs from the room.
“Nice job, dickhead.” Deacon hands Julie to Emberlee to her chanting, “Dick. Dick. Head.”
“I’m outta here.” Mason hauls ass while I watch Emberlee with Julie. It’s a beautiful sight.
I’ll be strong and able to set limits with my Smudge. The door opens, and in comes my beautiful girl— with an assload of purchases. What could she possibly need?
Who can resist Black Friday shopping? Saylor and I needed maternity clothes. And baby outfits. We’re having girls and have to prepare— bows, shoes, frilly diaper covers. It’s some unwritten rule.
“Embe did you leave anything in the stores?” His face is pulled tight, and his shoulders tense.
“No. I just got us started.” Silly man. I start pulling all the cuteness from the bags, and he isn’t smiling. “What’s wrong?”
“Won’t you get that stuff at a shower or something?” I roll my eyes. Then I pause. Will I? I haven’t done this.
I shrug. “There was so much. I couldn’t stop myself.”
He sighs and sits down. I watch his head fall, and he begins rubbing the back of his neck. I’m scouring my brain for what could have caused this reaction. “What’s wrong?”
He lifts his head and swallows a few times. “This is hard.”
“What?” As far as I remember, he was snug in bed while I was fighting the madhouse of the stores.
“How much was all this?” he sputters, waving his arms over the bags.
“I don’t know.” I’m unpacking the bags so I can show him the ‘Daddy’s Little Girl’ onesie I found.
“You don’t know?” His eyebrows shoot up along with his body. “How the hell did you pay for it?”
I don’t like his tone. “My credit card.” Duh, it’s how I pay for everything.
“Your parents’ credit card?” Same difference.
I mimic his same petulant tone. “The credit card that is in my name.”
“That your parents pay for?” His voice booms with each ensuing word.
“Yes.”
“Damn it, Emberlee. I can’t afford all this.” He turns from me.
“And you don’t have to pay for it.” My stomach rolls, and it’s dawning on me what the issue is.
“And who will? Your parents? That’s my baby and you’re my girl. Fuck. We discussed this.” We did. Sorta. Shit, I screwed up.
“I’ll take it back.” I fight tears. I really like this stuff, but I really love him. I’m used to buying what I want— but I don’t overuse the privilege. My dad makes sure I stay within reason.
He comes to me and pulls me in his arms, exhaling. “Don’t cry, baby. I’ll sort it out.”
“No. You’re right. But we aren’t married, so it isn’t up to you to take care of me. I can get a job if you don’t want my parents supporting me.” His arms flex, squeezing my waist.
“Like hell you will. I said I’ll handle it. Show me what you got for Smudge.” The false enthusiasm doesn’t reach his eyes, and the tone he’s using is fake.
I put everything back in the bags, and through my sniffles, I ignore him. I get a few outfits packed up, and he empties them. “What the hell, Brody?”
“I said I’d handle it. Don’t hide from me.” He pins me with his best don’t fuck with me stare.
My hormones don’t agree.
They also don’t allow me to keep quiet.
“I’m trying. You’re upset, and I get it. I didn’t think it through. A lot is changing and that isn’t why I’m upset. I’m thrilled. But I’m also twenty years old, having a baby, unwed, confused about my dad, reeling from hormones, trying to finish school, trying to keep you happy, going to meet your mom in a few weeks, and I went shopping. It shouldn’t be a big deal— if my parents felt differently they would have said something. My job is to finish school with their support. It doesn’t diminish your position in my life, but you draw this line like it does.” The tears are real, and they’re falling fast. I swear I’d think this girl inside me is PMS’ing and passing her symptoms to me. “All I wanted was to get a shirt to hide my sleavage.” I plop down in his seat, cover my face, and cry.
Cry for every pair of cute jeans I passed up because my ass won’t fit in them.
Sob for the high heels I walked by because Smudge throws off my center of gravity.
Weep for adorable flannel shirts that wouldn’t button in a month over my stomach.
Bawl because in spite of all that— I’m happy. But he’s making me feel bad.
“Fuck you, Brody.” I leave my bags, grab my purse and go to Saylor and Deacon’s so I can get a way from him. They aren’t home when I get there, so I go down to my old house where Avery and Brecklynn live.
They’re sitting there in the cute pajamas, sipping coffee— which I’m sure isn’t decaf, but I’ve had my maximum daily allowance so that pisses me off. I slam the door in displeasure. “Whoa, Lee Lee. What’s gotten into to you— besides Brody’s sperm?” Not fucking funny Avery.
I narrow my eyes. She widens hers and places her hands in front of her, offering to surrender, but I mistake it for her wanting to hold me while I snot all over her. Thankfully, she allows it. She even rubs my back and hugs me.
She doesn’t question my spending habits.
She doesn’t mock me.
“I’m getting sleavage!” I howl and wipe my nose with her cute pajama top. At least I get a bit of satisfaction in that.
“Did you wipe your snot on me?” She’s somewhat shocked but with a trace of humor.
“Yeah. It’s a really cute top, and I hate you for wearing it around me.” I have no shame.
“Holy shit, you’re as bad as Saylor. I’m thinking I should study abroad.” Avery shoves me off her.
“I thought about that once. Didn’t work so well for me, so best of luck.” I look to Brecklynn, and my anger comes back.
“Ugh, why do you have to look like your brother?” I growl.
She giggles. “I don’t at all, but now we know the root of your issues this morning. What’d he do?” Maybe I should wipe some snot on her, too.
“I don’t want to talk about it.” I sigh.
“I just Googled sleavage. You can get Brody to show you how to use light weights to tone your arms.” Avery is proud of herself, and I’m picturing her missing some teeth as well. Pregnancy must make you violent.
“So you agree? I have sleavage.” The last words are a sobbing mess.
“No. You were complaining, I was coming up with a solution. You’re beautiful, Lee Lee.” Avery is back to rubbing my back, but she’s added petting my head. Like a damn dog.
“Stop petting me unless you want me to bite.” I giggle.
“Jeez. Four months left of this rollercoaster.” Avery sighs. “I think you and Saylor are like birth control on steroids.”
“They’re like playing Wheel of Attitude. Never know what you’re gonna get when you spin.” Brecklynn adds her two cents.
They think they’re cute. “So how are you and Mason?” I turn the tables.
“Oh, that ship sailed to Fuck It Mountain. His ball bitches try my patience, and I don’t have time to deal.” Her voice sounds steady, but there’s something behind her eyes that tells me she isn’t happy with this decision.
“Who decided this? And ball bitches?” I want the scoop. I’ll focus on someone else’s misery.
“I decided. He isn’t happy. Wanted to try a relationship.” Holy fuck, this was massive. “And ball bitches— baseball chasers. They’re fucking everywhere. Like crotch spiders.” Avery and I both bark in laughter.
“Holy shit. Mason wanted a girlfriend, and Brecklynn broke his heart,” Avery teases and I feel guilty. Mason is a great guy. I can look at Brecklynn and see it hurts her, but I don’t like she hurt him. If he was willing to become exclusive, it meant something.
“Avery— stop. Mason is our friend. He’s probably upset,” I warn.
“And I’m not? You try dealing with the girls everywhere. At all times.” She has a point.
“I don’t know, Breck. Are you upset? If he said he wanted you— take him at his word. He doesn’t lie.” I get taking a leap of faith isn’t easy.
“I didn’t say he was lying. But I know me. I’m jealous as hell, and I was creating drama and fights that weren’t his fault, but I can’t deal with his past. I’m being honest.” I understand and I’ll respect that. “Yes, I am upset.” Cue her tears. Fuck, we’re a pair. She’s crying, and Avery and I move to her, and I let Avery pet her head while I rub soothing circles against her back. She wipes her own snot with her shirt, and I feel satisfied.
I’m going to hell.
After a few minutes of cry-o-palooza we eat ice cream— for breakfast. Adulting has its perks. I yawn, and Avery tosses me a blanket. I curl into the couch, and I’m out before the episode of Jerry Springer is over. I better not dream of strippers dating their brothers and having their cousin’s baby—
I wake in my own bed cocooned in Brody’s arms and his soft snore whispering in my ear. I roll over and brush the hair off his forehead. His eyes flutter and come open. “Hey, beautiful.”
“Hey. How’d I get here?” I continue running my fingers through his hair.
“I brought you home. You needed some space, and I handled some things.” Again. The guilt that I’m screwing something up.
“I’m sorry. It’s just stuff. I’ll take it back.” His lips meet my forehead.
“No, Embe. I handled it. I unpacked all the bags. I don’t know what you need to do for them to go up, but I took all the tags off. No returns. And I hid the receipts.”
“What? Brody, no. I won’t pretend to understand why it bothers you that I use my credit card— that you don’t pay, but I’ll respect it. What are you going to do when I get access to my trust? That’ll be our money . . . unless you don’t want to get married.”
“Stop that train of thought. I’d marry you tomorrow— it’s you who balks at that idea. I appreciate you understanding and from now on, please use the card I gave you. If it’s a huge purchase, let me know so we can discuss it. For the time being I’ve worked some stuff out. And we’ll cross the trust thing when it happens.” He pulls me closer. “I need some rest. I’ll be starting my new job tonight.”
“New job?” I bolt upright and get dizzy. “Whoa.” I reach for the nightstand to stop the room spinning.
“Lay back. What’s wrong?” He’s up and over me before I can answer.
“Dizzy.” I close my eyes and breathe. “I didn’t eat yet today.”
“SHIT!” He stomps to the kitchen, and I hear rattling and slamming, but I remain where I am. Trying to get the room to stop acting like I’m on the Gravitron at the county fair. I put one foot on the floor— it worked one too many drunken nights. But, it doesn’t do shit this morning.
He brings eggs and toast in the room. “You can’t skip eating.” He’s so cute when he’s up in arms over something I’ve done.
“I forgot— I had ice cream at Avery’s.” He shakes his head and goes back to the kitchen to get his own plate. When he’s settled next to me, I broach the subject. “What job?”
“Security at Club Rodeo. Weekends only.” I snort. Really?
“They have live bull riding.” I don’t know why I bring that point up.
“Yes. I won’t be in charge of the bulls. I’ll handle the belligerent college kids.” He grins. I frown. “What?”
“Why’d you get a job?”
“It’s just during off season. Extra cash. I went by your parents and asked them to stop paying your credit card bill. I gave them a check for the shopping expedition you took today, and it made a dent in my savings. This way there will be money coming in besides my stipend and other job. It’s weekends so it won’t interfere with school.”
He did this without talking to me.
He did this because of me.
He did this and it makes me sad. And I feel like shit. “Brody, I’m sorry. Don’t do this.” I royally fucked up.
“It’s done. I’m not upset, and you shouldn’t be either. We need to be prepared— we have a baby coming.” I know. I know all this. I just don’t know what it entails.
I take our plates to the kitchen, and he’s snoozing when I get back. Time to go talk to my parents. I ne
ed a wake-up call, and I have a feeling it’s one they can deliver.
“Well baby girl, I can give you a man’s point of view. But, it’s a bit different because money hasn’t been an issue for us.” I sigh. My dad is walking a fine line, and I respect he’s trying to help. “I wouldn’t say Brody is struggling, he’s made good financial decisions, and he’s invested well— that won’t pay off until later. He laid it all out for me, and I don’t doubt he can take care of you . . . even if that is still my job. You won’t be living off cereal and Ramen noodles, but you can’t shop seven days a week.”
“I don’t do that. I just don’t want him to take all the responsibility on himself and now he’s gotten an extra job. If he’d just talk to me— give me a budget or something.” I whine.
“That’s a good idea. Did you tell him that?” My mom sets a glass of milk down in front of me.
“No. I was kind of reeling from emotional overload.” I need to do that. I can deal with that.
“I talked to him regarding your trust. I’d like to do what we discussed. Give you an amount upfront, and when you two graduate, you can pay me back or wait until you get the rest and pay me back from that. I don’t want you two starting life and a family with financial burdens.” My dad has a point, but I can imagine how Brody took it.
“And?” I question.
“He wasn’t receptive to it. I tried to explain that it would be for you and essentially him and your family whether it was now or when you were older.” He’s so damn bullheaded. Missing incisors and Brody’s face dance in my head.
“Thanks, Daddy. I’ll talk to him.” I kiss his cheek so I can catch my significant other before he goes and plays with bulls.
“I’m proud of you, Emberlee.” I freeze. I need to hear that again.
“I’ll go back to therapy,” I blurt.
His eyes smile. “I’d like that. If I didn’t think the two of you could handle this, I’d be pitching a fit. You’ll be fine.”