by Shawn Luther
“I hope you do not mind.” She looked sheepish. It looked good on her. She continued, “I woke up a couple of hours ago and had a shower. I was starving so I raided your fridge.”
I winked at her and replied, “Hey my casa is u casa”. I threw my keys on the counter and turn a kitchen chair around backward and sat down.
“Seriously though, are you feeling better?”
She turned back to the stove I thought I saw a grimace. She was still holding her ribs.
I took the other pain pill you left for me so It is bearable. My face hardly hurts at all now.
She removed the bacon from the pan and put it on a waiting plate. I stood and got her the loaf of bread off the top of the fridge. I opened my mouth to make a joke about her height but shut it when I saw her warning look. “Do not do it!” She playfully growled at me. I batted my eyes in return which made her grab her ribs and laugh out loud.
I felt a great weight being lifted off my heart when I heard that laugh. If she could laugh like that after a severe beating I knew she'd be ok.
Sabra munched on her sandwich and looked at me quizzically. “Where have you been?” She asked cocking her head to the side in a way which made my heart lurch in my chest. I got up and turned to the fridge to get a beer to hide my reaction. I opened my beer and took in a deep drink before I could turn back and meet her gaze. “I went to visit and old friend”.
She spoke with a mouth full of food asked, “Do you mind if I have one of those?” Pointing at my beer with her sandwich. I admonished, “Do not talk with your mouth full young lady” I stood to get her a beer and was glad she could not see my face when she replied, “yes maam!” And then, “You know you are not that much older than me and I do not need a mama”.
I tensed instantly at that comment.
I opened her beer and handed it to her, “good cuz I aint taking you to raise!”
Neither one of us knew what happened to make the moment tense. It did not matter because as quick as it had come it was gone again.
Sabra finished her meal and got up to rinse her plate. “I wanted to thank you for taking care of me last night”. She started, “You did not have to and I want you to know I appreciate it.”
She was leaning against the sink holding her ribs with one hand while looking at her fingernails on the other. I could tell she hadn’t asked for much from anybody in this world and she was proud. I stood up and crossed the floor and stood before her. I reached down and took her stubbornly set chin in my hand and raised her face to mine.
I hadn’t meant it a romantic gesture but I could see in her eyes that she thought it was. She did not pull away so I continued, “I would have done the same for anyone in need.” Her eyes clouded and she started to cry. I pulled her close and she laid her head on my chest. We stayed that way for a few minutes then I kissed her head and pulled away. “Let me take a look at those ribs”, I urged her softly.
As she raised her shirt I had to grit my teeth. She lowered her shirt and I turned away so she would not see the rage in my eyes.
“I called in sick for work today and explained what was going on” Sabra said, “my boss is a good guy, he told me I could take the a few days off. I do not have to go back to work until Monday.”
“All kidding aside, I have no place to go but I still have most of my paycheck left.” She looked at me with proud eyes and asked, “Do you know where I can find a room to rent cheap?” She lowered her eyes and I knew she did not have enough money for even a cheap room. There are no cheap rooms in Denver.
“I know of a real cheap room if you do not mind sleeping on a couch.” I laid my cheek on Sabras lowered head and continued, “Look kid, I do not mind you staying here until you get on your feet.”
Sabra raised her head and narrowed her eyes and stated in a firm voice, “I’m not some charity case!” She softened a little knowing that I was just trying to help. “I insist on paying you.”
I sat back down on my backwards facing chair. “Sit down”, I asked gently.
“You need to save your money so when you’re ready you will be able to pay deposits on a place” I added firmly, “You can clean up around here or something if you feel that strongly about earning your keep!”
Sabra look at me with a look that said thank you for letting me keep my pride. I just smiled and nodded, letting her know I understood without saying a word.
“I need to get my things from Tiffanies’ place but I can’t stand to go back there”. She looked like she might puke.
“I can go get your things for you Sabra; I do not think you should go there ever again.” I pleaded.
She thought about it for a moment then said, “I do not want the asshole to hurt you!”
I laughed and assured her that fucker did not have what it took to hurt me.
She looked puzzled then asked, “What are you going to do Jo?” Adding fervently, “Please do not go over there and get hurt! I can live with what he did but I could not take it if you got hurt trying to help me!” She was shaking.
“Hey hey hey calm down girl! I’m not going to get hurt! I promise.” I’m not going alone Sabra. I added “My friend Mo will go with me and I promise he won’t hurt a hair on either of our heads.”
She looked at me with non-believing eyes. I could tell she wasn’t convinced yet.
I thought for a minute then said, “Look, how about I call Mo up and have her come over?” That way you can see why I am not afraid of our friend Rudy. “
She still looked doubtful but nodded her head.
“Good! I’ll call Mo now and have her come pick me up, that way you can meet her before we go ok?”
Again Sabra silently nodded her head.
I called Mo and asked if she would go with me to pick up Sabras things. I did not want Sabra to know we had already come up with a plan for revenge. I knew that if I talked to her like it was the first she had heard from me about my new friend. I knew Mo would pick up on it so I did not worry about her arguing.
Mo picked up on the third ring and I told her I needed her to go with me to pick up Sabras things.
I knew she had reservations about my helping this woman but I was a little shocked when she asked with a gruff note in her voice, “Seriously Jo! Are you sure that’s such a good idea given what we are planning?” When I did not answer right away she softened and said, “It is just that I think we should remain anonymous given our plans”.
I hadn’t thought of that. Mo was right proving once again she had my back.
I simply replied, “Your right.” Then I asked, “Do you have a better idea?”
The silence on the other end of the line told me what I already knew. My lifelong friend disagreed with my helping Sabra. I also knew she would come through. As if hearing my thoughts Mo answered, “Have Sabra call the cheating whore. Tell her if she does not want charges filed on her and her punk ass boyfriend she had better take her belongings to the Cats Ass and leave them with the bartender. You call the bar and tell her we will be by to pick them up later.”
I smiled at my friend’s cunning. “As always Mo you are a fucking genius...I’ll do that but I still think you should come over. I paused for a moment and then added,” and bring some beers. “I heard my friend sigh with resignation. I hung up knowing she would come.
I wanted her to meet Sabra. Mo needed to see what I saw in her that makes me want to help her. I knew my friend was helping me and did not care why. I wanted her to meet the person for whom she could go to prison for if we got caught.
Sabra looked at me with a question in her eyes when I hung up. I told her, “Mo is coming to have a few beers.” I handed her the phone and told her to call Tiffany and have her drop her things off at the bar.
Sabra called and I was glad to hear the chill in her voice. It meant she was not going to let this bitch take herself worth and stomp on it.
When Sabra hung up she told me Tiffany had agreed to take Sabras things to the bar and leave them right now. She did not want any mo
re trouble.
I had news for her though; her friend Rudy had more trouble coming to him for what he did to Sabra, much more trouble.
Sabra was in the bedroom resting when Mo finally showed up. I went in and told her Mo and I were going to pick up her things. I asked her if she felt well enough to sit with us when we returned and she agreed.
I pulled the bedroom door closed and Mo and I were on our way to the bar.
We took Mos ride to the bar. I did not want anyone to see my truck and later make the connection to Sabra.
We were backing out of the drive when Mo finally spoke. “So I guess this is all going down now for sure?” I did not have to answer. She already knew my mind was made up. She was looking at my friends profile as she drove. I knew she wasn’t going to try to talk me out of it. She was just trying to protect me from myself.
I stayed in the car when we got to the Cats Ass. I knew the bartender had seen me with Sabra the night before. Mo agreed to go in because nobody would connect her to Sabra.
We drove back to my place in silence. I asked Mo to please keep an open mind.
“I will give her a chance Jo, but I still won’t think it is a good idea for you to get involved with her!” She reiterated firmly.
“Mo! I swear to you that I do not have any hidden motives! Damn woman what am I going to have to do to convince you?” I realized I had raised my voice when I looked up and saw my friends’ brow furrow hard. I added, “I’m sorry Mo, I’m trying to do this right and I feel like you aren’t giving me the chance to prove I can.”
Mos brow relaxed and she punched me on the shoulder and said with a resigned grin, “Well alright then what are waiting for!” God bless her she was going to stop busting my proverbial balls. I grinned back at her and we went inside so Mo could meet Sabra.
Sabra was still asleep when we walked in so I asked Mo to grab us some cold ones while I went to wake her up.
I went into the bedroom and Sabra was lying there curled up in a tight ball sleeping. I sat down on the bed and gently touched her shoulder. She started awake with a sharp intake of breath.
“Whoa there kid It is just me” I put my hand to her face. She relaxed instantly.
“What time is it?” She asked sleepily. I stood to go get her some more meds from the bathroom and answered, “Its 10:30, and I just wanted you to know we got your things with no trouble.” She took the pill from my hand and swallowed it with water from the nightstand.
“I have someone in the living room who wants to meet you.” Sabra sat up and asked, “Oh I am in no shape to meet anyone!” She exclaimed raking her hand through her hair nervously. I smiled and reassured her. “It is ok, It is just my friend Mo. Sabra trust me when I tell you she is a person you want to know. We have been friends for a long time. She is a little gruff and looks like a big ol tough dyke but she’s a marsh mellow. I promise.”
Sabra looked doubtful but agreed, “Did you say you have my clothes? If I am going out there I want my own clothes.”
I laughed and said “I’ll be right back.”
I went out and got the bags we had retrieved from the bar and took them into the bedroom. Sabra was already in the bathroom fixing herself up. “Just leave them by the door. I’ll be out shortly.” She instructed.
I put the bags on the bed and went back out to get myself a beer. Mo had already helped herself. She made herself at home anytime she comes to my home. She had turned on the satellite radio and tuned into “The Acoustic Lounge”. We had the same taste in music so I was cool with her choice.
Mo glanced at the closed bedroom door and said, “If she's too tired I can meet her another time you know.”
Before I could answer Sabra came out. She went right up to Mo and looked her dead in the eye and held out her hand. I could tell Mo was amused. She glanced at me with a raised brow and the faintest of smiles.
Sabra shook Mos hand firmly and said “Good to meet you”. Mo muttered the same in return as Sabra released her hand, turned and asked if it was ok to have a beer on top of the medication I had given her. “I’m not asking permission mind you just asking about the medicine mixing with alcohol”. I saw Mo bust out into a full on smile as I told her, “I do not think it will hurt you. They aren’t narcotics so I think you’re good. Sabra went into the kitchen and got herself a beer saying over her shoulder, “I’m feeling much better. I do not think my ribs are broken. They are sore but it doesn’t hurt as much when I breathe. “
I watched her walk back into the living room and it did seem she was moving better. Sabra sat down on the couch beside Mo, looked up at me and asked, “So you did not have any trouble getting my things?”
I sat on the arm of the sofa shaking my head. Sabra turned to Mo and said “I did not want her to go. Thank you for going with her. I was sure that bitch would bring Rudy and jump her in the parking lot. “
Sabra did not know it but she was winning all kinds of brownie points with Mo. She had shown Mo her self confidence by looking Mo in the eye and shaking her hand. Now she was showing that she had concern for my safety and well being.
I relaxed because I knew Mo liked Sabra. I watched my friends’ eyes as they chatted about this and that. I could see she was starting to understand my motives a little better.
It was after 2 am when I walked Mo out to her truck. She was silent but I could hear her wheels turning.
As she got in her truck she simply said, “We will talk about this in the morning.” Call me when you get up and I’ll come over. We have to figure out what to do about your bumper.”
I winked at her and she backed out and drove toward home. I knew my factory bumper would not stand up to my plans.
Chapter 9
Later, in the darkness of my bedroom I began to go over the whole situation in my throbbing head.
Am I going through with this? Did I even want to? What about the trouble I could bring down on my best friend?
Mo was a rock and had been there for me unquestionably through thick and thin. This was not my battle or hers. I knew Monica would do whatever I asked of her, but she had not had the best life herself. She too had to grow up fast. Her family wasn’t dysfunctional in the least. Her family was a good upstanding Christian family. One mommy one daddy, and 2.5 children.
This is the math of the American dream family.
Monica “Mo” Lewis had been placed in a mental hospital by her fine upstanding family at 16 years old. Monica got caught kissing a girl in our high school sports equipment room. Our softball coach was a hard ass and turned her in. We knew it was because she was hiding deep in her own closet. She would not take the chance of looking like she was pro “gay” if anyone else ever found out.
Our coach was one of those gay women who try to dress and act straight. She might be fooling the administration, but she set off gaydar everywhere else. It was her fault Monica was “treated” with electroshock therapy for her “disorder.”
When Monica got out she wasn’t the same. She never again said another word about her sexuality. That is until one night at 18 years old she packed her shit and told her great American family to kiss her white dyke ass. Monica and I started planning our get away when my father beat the hell out of me. My dad had seen that it was Laura pulling away that night. When he saw the hickey he threw me out with just the clothes on my back the same night he caught me sneaking in at 4 am.
Monica had saved every penny she earned or had gotten for birthdays and graduation. She also took her father’s coin collection valued at five grand. Monica had originally planned to wait until summer so she could save a little more. She gave that idea up to rescue me. She had gotten a car for her 17th birthday. She and I both knew it was more because her father felt guilty for having her committed.
When we left Texas we never looked back.
We headed for Denver where Monica found work right away and I started my photography career. We lived in a small cheap apartment for a year before we both could afford to live in our own. Monica and I sta
yed best friends through all our lives and I value this.
I had to think of her safety in this plan of mine. I could not let anything happen to Mo.
Chapter 10
I must have drifted off to sleep because I jolted awake when an arm slipped around my waist. It took me a second to understand Sabra had crawled into my bed. I did not say anything to her I just let her cuddle up and fall asleep. I lay still until I heard her soft rhythmic breathing.
My mind began to scream “What the hell is going on! You have to wake her up and tell her to return to the couch! Better yet you go sleep on the couch! I told my inner voice to shut the hell up. It felt good to have this contact. I started thinking about my own motives.
Sometimes I am my own worst enemy. Mo had seen me hurt by many others in the past. We used to get into arguments about my seemingly endless need to play the knight in shining armor.
This is a condition many suffer at one point or another throughout their lives. We think we are a knight in shining armor. We will show up on a white horse to rescue you. I have played this game of delusion most of my life. I did not know why, but it seems like something in us drives us to hop in and look for someone to fix us or fulfill us. Yet we know that this is unhealthy and doesn’t work. But still, we hope that he (or she) will show up and fix it all or the other way around. I thought I needed to “rescue” or “fix” people. But I’m learning something and It is changing me a little at a time. I am learning to listen to my own intuition. I am experiencing the satisfaction that comes from rescuing me.
Every decision that I’ve made from that place of looking for someone who needs rescuing has caused me all kinds of grief and drama. I had even begun therapy after my last girlfriend clearly used me to get away from an abusive ex-girlfriend.
Mo and I had argued about her as well. I had won the argument that time but lost in the end when the woman I had helped left me. She had left me while I was away on a shoot. I would not have minded except she took everything I owned when she left. It seemed the abusive ex had talked her into coming home.
