Once You'Ve Touched the Heart

by Iris Bolling

  JD grabbed her again and tightened his arms around her. Tracy felt his chest swell and it frightened her a little. Impatiently he said, “Did you not understand what I said—there is no turning back. I’m willing to fight for that; why aren’t you? Is it something else, Tracy?”

  She pulled away from him again. “No, Jeffrey. I can’t take the idea of someone like Carolyn Roth trying to use me against you. That’s all it is.”

  “Tracy.” JD took a moment. He did not want to lose his temper, especially with Tracy. But if she kept this up, JD knew he was going to explode. “When you accompanied me on that stage tonight it was because from now on every oath I take I want you next to me, for the rest of my life. I need you beside me, guiding me. That’s why God put us together. All this other bullshit….”

  “How you going to speak of God in one sentence and use profanity in the next?” Tracy asked.

  JD gazed at Tracy, relaxed a little, then smiled. “He knows I’m a little pissed right now, he’ll forgive me. Now, back to the bullshit. You do realize Carolyn has her own agenda here? It had nothing to do with my well-being or yours.”

  “I know that.” Tracy sighed.

  He walked over to her, still a little frustrated. “I don’t know how to help you deal with people like Carolyn. People can only hurt us if we let them. I don’t plan on letting them. Just so you know, I will leave the DA’s office before I give you up.” JD walked to the bar between the family room and kitchen and poured a drink, while Tracy sat at the bar. JD watched her intently and thought. He was an attorney and made a living at convincing people to see things his way. Why was it so hard to get Tracy to understand she belonged with him? He took another drink as he watched her with her head lying on the bar. He smiled. She looked so precious, like a little girl in her own fantasy world. JD wanted to be a part of her fantasy. “Where did you get that dress from?” he asked.

  She looked up at him. “From Penne.” Tracy put her elbows up on the bar, and then put her hands under her chin. “Don’t you like it?” She smiled up at him. The smile was in her eyes as well as on her lips. JD knew she loved him. Anytime a person could deal with the shit that Carolyn dished out, and still be able to smile at him like that, he knew it was love. He leaned back against the counter. This was the second time she had mentioned leaving him. JD could not explain the way that made him feel. But he did not like it. “Marry me, Tracy,” he said without thinking.

  Tracy’s heart skipped. The look on her face was of pure shock. “What?” she asked, not sure she had heard him right.

  JD put the glass down and walked around the bar. He got down on one knee, looked up at her and proclaimed, “Tracy Alexandria Washington, I promise to love all your doubts away; to keep you safe and happy all the days of my life. Please, Tracy, marry me.”

  Tracy got down on her knees with him. Everything in her wanted to yell “Hell, yes.” She couldn’t get the words out. “Did you understand anything I just said to you about hurting you or your career?”

  “Yeah, I heard that. And I ask you again. Will you be my wife?”

  Tracy stared at JD with an intensity that made him feel unsure of himself. Jeffrey had never felt so vulnerable in his life. He thought for a moment she was going to say no and he wasn’t sure if he could handle the rejection; not from her.

  “Yes,” she said.

  JD smiled. “Yes? Wow, yes,” he said again, not believing what he heard. He kissed her.

  “Yes,” she said again.

  He took her face in his hands then proceeded to kiss every inch. Then he stopped suddenly. Both of them were on their knees laughing. “We should call Carolyn and thank her,” JD said.

  “Oh no, please don’t call her.” Tracy laughed. “Let me have this moment before she tries to take it away.”

  He held her and held her tight. “No one is going to take this away from us.” JD exhaled. “No one.”

  While it was an impromptu moment, JD had no second thoughts about asking Tracy to marry him. He held her tight and prayed she had no second thoughts about saying yes. They lay on the floor of Jeffrey’s family room talking through the night. They decided to tell Mama Harrison, Ashley and Pastor Smith only, until they were ready to make a formal announcement.

  The article in the Flair section of the Times-Dispatch covering the governor’s reception had the picture of the governor, Tracy, JD, Senator Roth, Carolyn and Gavin. The caption read, “Political couples of the future?” The article went on to mention the awards given to Jeffrey Harrison and the possible announcement of Gavin Roberts’s bid for the governor’s office. In the same article there was a smaller picture of Jeffrey and Tracy while he was taking the oath. Victoria, the author of the article made this statement:

  Now ladies, on a sad note for any of you with thoughts on conquering the heart of JD Harrison for yourself: you are out of luck. This reporter has it on good authority (JD Harrison himself) that he is off the market. I know, ladies, the news hurt my feelings, too. But meeting the lucky lady in person helped. She is a beautiful, intelligent young woman with a heart of gold. No, they are not engaged, but I suspect that will not be far away. I’ll keep you informed. In the meantime, ladies, I will be on the lookout for the next someone for our lonely hearts to daydream about. You can count on me.

  Carolyn’s rage hit the fan when she read that article. You may have won this battle, you little bitch, but the war has not been fought yet. Carolyn vowed to find a way to cause problems, but in a way not to piss off Gavin. Gavin had not proposed yet and Carolyn did not want to take a chance on angering him. She could not do anything to jeopardize the mansion, but she knew someone who could certainly put a wrinkle into Tracy’s day. Carolyn picked up the telephone and called an old rival. She smiled as she dialed the number. “Time for some fireworks.”

  Chapter 17

  After the governor’s function, James and Ashley sat in the lobby of the hotel and talked for hours. James was certain Tracy would not be home and did not like the idea of Ashley going home alone, with David Holt slithering about. He invited Ashley to stay the night at his place, in his guest room, of course, and she accepted.

  Ashley did not get a good look at James’s house when they entered that night. The next morning it startled her to see the size of his home. As she came down the stairs she noticed there were at least three bedrooms, each with an adjoining bathroom. The staircase led to the center of a huge foyer, which Ashley estimated was big enough for at least fifty people to stand in without touching each other. To her right, as she descended the stairs, was what appeared to be a family room or den. To the left was the dining room and kitchen area. That’s where James was sitting reading the paper. Ashley brushed her hair down hoping it was not tangled or standing up on top of her head.

  “Good morning.” She smiled as she entered the room. “You just happen to have women’s clothes in your house?” She asked, tugging at the robe she had on. Please say they belong to your sister, Ashley thought, laughing to herself.

  James smiled. “One never knows when a beautiful woman may need to stay over. One must be prepared at all times,” he said as he set the paper aside and pulled a chair out for her.

  Ashley smiled. “All of this was not necessary, you know.” Ashley sat in the seat and crossed her legs. She put her elbows on the table and rested her head in her hand. She inhaled and looked at James. He was a handsome man with very strong features. To Ashley, James was the epitome of what a man sitting at the head of a table should look like. He reminded her so much of her dad; not the way he looked or his size, but his very presence. James was a proud, private, reserved man on the surface. I know there is some fire under all the public persona, Ashley smiled to herself.

  “Would you like some breakfast, ma’am?” A voice startled Ashley back to the present. A somewhat older, attractive woman of either Mexican or Spanish descent was smiling at her with a maid outfit on.

  “Just coffee would be fine,” Ashley replied as she pulled her robe tighter aroun
d her waist. She had no idea someone else was in the house with them. As the maid left the room, Ashley reached over and took the toast and a slice of bacon off James’s plate.

  James smiled. Ashley did not seem intimidated by him at all. “Are you hungry?”

  “Starving,” she replied.

  He laughed. “Clair would have fixed you breakfast, you know.”

  “I would feel guilty making someone cook for me. But that’s okay, I’ll eat yours,” she said as she pulled his plate in front of her. Clair came back in the room and saw Ashley eating James’s food. She put the coffee in front of Ashley.

  “I’ll fix you another plate.” She smiled at James then left the room.

  “Thank you,” Ashley said to the woman’s back.

  “Her name is Clair,” James said as he pushed the sugar and cream towards her.

  “Thank you,” Ashley said. “Is she your maid or just your cook or more?”

  James gazed at Ashley then smiled. “Clair is my housekeeper and a little of everything you just said; with the exception of the ‘or more.’”

  “Why do you have a housekeeper?” Ashley asked as she continued to eat. “For that matter, why do you have such a big house?”

  James laughed. “I have a housekeeper because I do have a big house which I do not like to clean. And I like to eat, but can’t cook, therefore, I have someone to cook for me.”

  Ashley smiled, but never stopped eating. “Doesn’t it bother you to have someone waiting on you hand and foot?”

  “No. I pay her very well to do just that,” James replied.

  “Oh,” Ashley said as Clair returned with a plate of food for James. “Thank you again,” Ashley said as Clair left the room. “And the house: why such a big house for one person?”

  “You are full of questions this morning,” James replied.

  “If you want to know something you have to ask, or else you will go on wondering,” Ashley replied in a very nonchalant manner.

  Changing the subject, James put the paper in front of Ashley and said, “Your brother made the paper again today.”

  Ashley smiled as she picked up the paper. “Oh, what a nice picture of him and Tracy. It really was a nice function last night. Thank you for letting me join you at your table.” Ashley smiled.

  “I don’t recall allowing anything. If I remember correctly, you told me you would be there.”

  “You could have said no.” Ashley smiled.

  “And miss the pleasure of your company or the drama of David Holt? I don’t think so”

  James saw Ashley’s disposition change instantly at the mention of David Holt. Ashley appeared to be so lighthearted and charismatic. But the mere mention of Holt revealed a vulnerability that did not sit well with James. He noticed it the day of the luncheon and again last night. Ashley was shaken by Holt’s action, although she would never admit it.

  “You ready to tell me about David Holt?” he asked as he began drinking his coffee.

  “You know, my mom is going to kill me,” Ashley said in an attempt to get James off the subject. “I’m supposed to meet her at church this morning.”

  James picked up the cordless phone. “Call her; let her know you will not make it today.”

  Ashley hesitated. “I don’t want to talk about this right now.”

  James set the phone on the table. “It’s not an option at this point. Call your mother. Let her know you will not meet her at church today. When you finish, we will talk about David Holt.”

  James watched her mind working. She was trying to come up with some clever statement to cover up her fear. But he was not going to let her deal with this situation alone. Ashley noticed James was staring at her. She really wanted to get to know this man. But how would he feel about her once she told him about David? Ashley never discussed the incident involving David with anyone, not even Tracy.

  “Nothing you say to me will be revealed to anyone, if you don’t want it to be,” James said as if reading her mind.

  Ashley hesitantly called her mother. “Hey mom, I’m being held hostage by a very attractive man and I will not be able to meet you at church today.” She put the phone back on the table beside James. “Mom will be saying a prayer for you,” Ashley advised James.

  James smiled. “Thank you. I’m sure I need it.” He waited.

  Ashley sighed. “What do you want to know?”

  “Everything.”

  Ashley related the story to him just about the same way the report read. The difference was the fear he heard in her voice. “I was stupid,” she began. “I thought I was in love, you know. One night Tracy and I decided to meet and study in the study hall next to the library.” Ashley looked down at the plate as if she was ashamed of what she was about to tell James. That part upset James the most. She swallowed then continued to play with the food on her plate. “David got there a few minutes after I went in the room. He said a lot of dumb shit I didn’t want to hear. When I told him that and tried to walk away, he went off.” She was quiet for a moment, then tears rolled down her face. “He threw me against the wall, then jumped on me with all his weight.” She hesitated as the memories came back. “He pulled my clothes off. I fought him. I really did, with everything I had, but he was so strong. He held me down with one hand; I couldn’t move. It didn’t matter what I did, I could not get him off of me.”

  James went around the table to where she was, pulled her into his arms and just held her. He rubbed her back as she continued telling him what happened.

  Clair walked in the room. James shook his head for her not to say anything; she went back into the kitchen. He lifted Ashley in his arms then carried her into the family room. He sat on the couch with her in his lap and held her until she had calmed down. Here she was, this very confident, independent woman with everything going for her. No one would ever know she had been carrying this around with her all these years. “Did he actually…?”

  Before James completed the question, Ashley shook her head. “No.”

  “Okay, did you ever tell your brother about this?” James asked.

  She shook her head. “No.”

  “You and Tracy are the only ones who know?”

  “David knows,” she said as she sniffled.

  “That all happened, what, five years ago. Why is he bothering you now?” James asked.

  “He had a problem with the way Tracy and I handled things,” she sighed. “Since the coach cleared everything up for him, I felt he could do whatever he wanted with me. Tracy didn’t like the idea of him having that kind of control over me. So she wrote an article and had it published in the school paper with his description.” Ashley laughed through her tears. “He was so mad, but there was nothing he could do about it because she never named him. See, David has a very distinguished birthmark on his butt and when Tracy entered the room she saw it. When his girlfriend heard about the article she broke up with him.” Ashley began to laugh more. “Life got interesting after that. Tracy never got involved in anything. I mean nothing until then. She was my rock until I was able to get my backbone back.”

  Ashley stopped talking. She did not like feeling this vulnerable with James or any man. She had to get out of this situation. She attempted to stand, but he held her still.

  James could sense she was uncomfortable now that she had revealed the event. “I know at this moment you feel vulnerable; as if you just exposed yourself to me.” He kissed her forehead. “I’m honored you trust me with this. I would never reveal what you shared with me today with anyone. What you do have to worry about is what I’m going to do to Holt if I ever see him near you again.”

  Ashley looked up at James; he truly was a fine man. Ashley surveyed James’s face as she sat there. He had thick eyebrows over deep brown eyes, with a very commanding baritone voice that was comforting to her. She smiled. “I must be losing my touch. I stayed in your house overnight. Here I am sitting in your lap with nothing on but a robe and you have not made a pass at me. Why is that?”

&
nbsp; James smiled and pulled her closer. She was back to Ashley now, full of life and a mischievous spirit. He could see it in her eyes and he liked it; he liked the idea of her. “You can try all you want to keep from talking about this, but it is not going to work. There is nothing you can do to avoid this conversation.”

  Ashley reached up and kissed him. Startled, James pulled his head back a little and looked at her.

  Why in the hell did she do that? He thought. His body’s response answered the question for him as he leaned forward to return the kiss.

  Ashley was surprised by the feeling she was getting inside. She had been with other men since David, but none who touched her emotionally the way James did. James got lost in the kiss for a moment, but when his body began to react to Ashley in a way that James did not expect, he knew he had to pull away. James was a careful man, a man who liked to stay in control. He did not get involved with anyone on any level without thinking it through. James slowly pulled away from the kiss. “I guess I was wrong.”

  Ashley smiled at him then tilted her head to the side. “You are an extraordinary man, James Brooks.”

  He smiled back. “You are a woman of many talents, Ashley Harrison. One of which is using that wonderful wit of yours to keep people away.”

  She began kissing his neck. “Are you really as composed as you appear?” She kissed the other side of his neck. “Or am I really out of my league here?” She stopped and waited for his response.

  Ashley was getting to him and James knew it. He stood up and set her on the sofa. “I always stay composed.” He smiled. He turned to walk away; he needed some space from her.

  Ashley stood and grabbed his arm. “It’s Tracy, isn’t it? Are you in love with her, James?”

  James thought for a moment. “No, I’m not in love with Tracy.”